He didn’t come to me. He didn’t try to talk to me.
I wipe the tears off my cheeks, and then stop dead in my tracks.
“Jesus, Addie, you’re being such a fucking hypocrite.”
He came to me tonight.
He apologized, and told me that he’s missed me, and he wrote me that incredible song.
And all the while, I’ve been punishing him for the way other men in my past have treated me. And that’s what I’ve accused him of: punishing me for what happened in his past.
I’m a goddamn hypocrite.
Oh my God.
Yes, he was scared, and he made a rash decision. It’s not like I’ve never done that. Yeah, I’ve done that plenty.
He’s gone to great lengths to make it up to me, and I’ve acted like a spoiled, wounded bear, licking my wounds.
I grab my handbag and slip my bare feet into flip-flops. I have to follow him. I pray he’s still willing to talk.
Please let him be willing to talk.
I shut my door behind me and turn to lock the dead bolt. It’s difficult to see through the dark and my tears.
“God, it tears me up to see you cry.”
I whirl, startled, and breathe a sigh of relief when I see Jake leaning against the wall beside my door.
“You’re here,” I breathe.
“I was trying to figure out a way to get you to let me in.” That smile. Even in the dark I can see it spread across his face, and I can’t stand it anymore. I just walk right into his arms, rest my head on his chest, and begin to cry in earnest.
“I’m sorry, Jake.”
“I’m the one who’s sorry,” he whispers, his face pressed into my hair. His arms are so tight around me it almost hurts, but there’s no way in hell I’m going to ask him to let me go. His hands rub soothingly up and down my back, as though he can’t believe I’m in his arms. “God, you feel good.”
I tip my head back and cup his cheek in my hand. The stubble is rough, but what makes me gasp is the wetness I feel on his skin. “Don’t go away.”
“I’m not going anywhere, sweetness.”
He leans his forehead against mine. “Addie, I love you so much it hurts.”
Just when my tears were drying up, he goes and says that.
“I feel like I’ve loved you for a long time,” I admit softly. “I think that’s why I was so stubborn this week. I let myself fall in love with you, and when you hurt me, I knew that I’d never survive it if it happened again.”
“Ah, baby.” He plants his lips on my forehead and takes a long, deep breath. “Let’s go inside. I’d rather the neighbors weren’t privy to the entire conversation.”
I grin and nod. “Good idea.”
I lead him into my condo, to the couch, where he sits and tugs me into his lap, wrapping his arms around me again. “I thought I’d lost you forever,” he murmurs, his voice rough with unshed tears. “I don’t ever want to feel that way again, Addie.”
“Me too.” I drag my fingertips down his face, his neck, and back up into his hair. “You need to understand, Jake, that you could never ruin my life, as long as you’re in it. You bring a lot of good to people.”
He begins to interrupt, but I lay my finger over his lips, stopping him.
“You. Are. Wonderful. You’re surrounded by people who care about you very much. You’re not going to ruin my life, Jake.”
“I know that now,” he says quietly. “And I realize that it was pretty egotistical of me to think so.” He shrugs, embarrassed. “I just always linked my bad decisions to my loved ones hurting, and I didn’t want to chance ever doing that to you.”
“And running away from me is what hurt me. Ironic, huh?”
He shakes his head. “I’m so sorry.”
“I owe you an apology too. The first time you asked me to talk with you, I should have. But I have my own baggage, because you don’t get to be our age, have life experiences, and not have the baggage that goes with it.”
“I’d like to help you unpack,” he says, kissing my forehead.
“I’d like that too.” I bury my face in his neck, kiss his smooth skin, and take the first deep breath I’ve taken since before our fight at the restaurant. “Jake, there isn’t one person in this world that I want more than I want you.”
He stills, then rubs his hands up and down my back, to my waist, and then simply hugs me close. “Not even one?”
“I might think twice if Scott Eastwood were to make me a proposition.”
Oh, how I’ve missed this!
“Who is Scott Eastwood?” he asks with a growl.
“You know, the actor. Clint’s son.”
“Hmm.” He narrows his eyes. “I’ve already been replaced by an Eastwood? I’m clearly off my game.”
“I haven’t replaced you yet,” I say with a laugh, combing my fingers through his soft hair. “I’m just saying, you’re all I want. Unless Scott crooks his finger at me. And even then, I’d probably still choose you.”
“Probably?” He kisses my forehead, then nuzzles my nose with his.
“Most likely.” He nibbles the corner of my mouth, down my jaw to my neck, and then sucks the skin between his lips, releasing it with a loud pop.
“Are you sure?” he whispers against my ear, and every hair on my body stands on end.
“I’m not so sure of my name right now,” I reply breathlessly. God, how does he turn me on with just one little touch?
“I think I can make you forget all about that Eastwood guy,” he says as he moves me effortlessly onto my back, laying me across the couch, hovering over me, kissing down my chest where my dress dips to show my cleavage. He’s dragging his nose down the crease, barely touching me, yet making me squirm beneath him.
“Jake, get me naked.”
“Not yet.” He grins, and I know I’m in trouble.
The best trouble ever.
I’m clawing at his black T-shirt, trying to drag it up his torso, but he’s keeping himself just out of my reach, frustrating the hell out of me.
“Please,” I whisper. He drags his lips, his tongue, back up my chest and neck, lowers himself against me, and buries his hands in my hair, brushing it gently.
“We are not going to take this fast, baby.” He nibbles my lips. “I’m going to make love to you, as slowly as possible. I didn’t think we’d be here again, and I want to savor you.”
“It’s no wonder you win Grammys,” I murmur. “You have such a way with words.”
He shakes his head and chuckles. “Every word is true.” He skims his nose down mine, sending goose bumps down my arms. “I know that our love isn’t perfect, Addie. But I do know that I will fight for us, I will protect you.”
“Even though I’m a wreck sometimes?” I whisper.
“In spite of it. I love your chaos, sweetheart.” He kisses me now, truly kisses me, taking it long and slow, in that perfect way that Jake does. This man has a gift when it comes to his mouth.
He’s plucking pins out of my hair, letting it down, and then his fingertips scrub my scalp, making me purr.
“That feels nice,” I say against his lips.
“I love your hair,” he says with a grin. “I love your style. And I love that I never know from one day to the next what you’ll look like. I have so much fun with you.”
“That might be the best compliment anyone has ever paid me,” I say, surprised. “Most people just see the boobs or the legs. They don’t pay attention to anything else.”
“I see you,” he says as his lips take a journey down my neck. His hands are pulling on my dress at my shoulders, pulling it down far enough to reveal my breasts. “Not that your tits aren’t absolutely gorgeous.” He grins up at me as he takes my already hard nipple into his mouth, teasing it with the tip of his tongue. My hips surge up, but he’s holding me firmly.
And he’s hard.
He moves to the other side, paying it the same attention. I try to pull his shirt up again, and this time he helps me pull it over
his head and tosses it aside, then resumes showing my breasts just how much he missed them.
And I get to touch his smooth skin, skimming my fingers up either side of his spine, into his hair, and down again. He’s low enough that I can hook my feet into the back pockets of his jeans and give a little tug. “I’d love it if you were naked right now.”
“I’d like to get you there first,” he replies, and helps me shimmy out of my dress and bra; then, with just my panties remaining, he plants his hand flat on my chest and pushes me back down onto the couch. “God, you take my breath away.”
I smile brightly as his gaze rakes down my body, then back up to my face. “Thank you.”
He leaves wet, openmouthed kisses down my torso, on my belly button, my hip. He hooks his thumbs into my panties and guides them down my hips and legs, kissing every inch of me as he slowly peels them off of me.
He tosses them aside, and kisses the arch of my foot. I’m lying here, bare as the day I was born, open wide for him, and he’s still taking his sweet time, kissing me, gazing at me.
Making me fucking crazy.
“Your skin is so soft,” he murmurs, then takes my other foot in his hand and begins his journey back up my leg.
I jump when his tongue grazes the back of my knee.
“Ticklish?” he asks.
“I had no idea that was an erogenous zone,” I breathe. He raises a brow and skims his tongue over the sensitive skin again. I tip my head back and moan, then gasp as he kisses up my inner thigh.
“I will never get enough of your pussy,” he whispers as he pulls my lips apart with his thumbs and leans in to swipe his tongue from my opening to my clit in one long, fluid motion, sending me reeling. “So pink, so responsive.”
I bury my fingers in his hair and tug, but he’s stronger than me. He just grins up at me and continues to wreak havoc on every nerve in my body with that amazing mouth of his, pulling my lips into his mouth and sucking gently, his tongue massaging and driving me out of my ever-loving mind.
“Jake!”
“Yes, baby.” He slides his hands under my ass and tilts me up. “You taste so sweet.”
“You’re going to make me come.” I can’t breathe, and I don’t care.
“That’s the goal,” he says with a chuckle, then blows on me, making the wet skin cool. He gently pushes two fingers inside me and wraps his lips around my clit, sucking in little pulses.
And that’s it. I’m done. I cry out as my world explodes into a million tiny pieces. My body is on fire. I can’t think. I can’t do anything except feel.
As I come down from the high, Jake kisses the sensitive crease between my thigh and pussy, then up my body, covering me again. I reach between us and unfasten his jeans, tugging them down his hips, and when he springs free, I cup him in my hand and guide the tip to where his mouth was just moments ago.
“Addie,” he whispers, his amazing green eyes pinned to mine.
“Jake.”
He’s barely inside me, but oh God, it feels so fucking good. I’m still gripping the shaft, and urge him in farther, until he’s buried completely inside me and we both sigh.
I clench my muscles, squeezing him, and he groans. “I missed you so much.”
“Me too.”
He begins to move slowly, in long, steady strokes. He’s not pounding me, he’s not fucking me.
He’s enjoying me. Every inch of me.
I’ve never felt so beautiful in my life.
He links our fingers and pins my hands over my head as he moves a little faster, just a little harder, as though he just can’t help it.
“Is this okay?” he whispers.
“So much more than okay,” I reply, watching him. I can’t stop watching him. His muscles are all flexed tight, and his stomach as he moves in and out is just . . . well, it should be fucking illegal.
“You are so sexy,” I moan.
And that does it. He swears under his breath, releases my hands, and buries his face in my neck as he comes, pushing in one last, hard time as he lets go.
My hands are skimming up his back and down his sides, my feet resting on his calves.
“God, what you do to me,” he whispers in my ear, kisses my neck, and pushes up to smile down at me. “I love you.”
“I love you.”
“THIS IS GOOD,” Jake says, his mouth full of grilled cheese with turkey and tomato. He passes me the bag of Doritos.
After we snuggled—I can’t believe I’m a freaking snuggler—and cleaned up, we decided we were starving. I don’t remember the last meal I had. So I made us the hearty sandwiches and we piled back onto the couch with our food.
“I think the sun is about to come up,” I say, gazing out the window. “How long did we snuggle?”
“For a while. You’re so crazy about me, you couldn’t bare to let me up,” he says with a shake of his head. “You should be so embarrassed.”
“You’re hilarious,” I reply dryly and roll my eyes. “That’s some ego you have there, Keller.”
“It’s not ego if it’s all true.”
I smirk, then shrug. “Okay, I guess it’s true. I might like you. A little.”
He sighs deeply, chewing on the last bite of his sandwich. He’s sitting on the opposite side of the couch, in just his jeans, and I can’t take my eyes off his tanned, toned torso.
And then I giggle at the alliteration in my head.
“What?”
“Nothing.” I nibble my sandwich as he sets his empty plate aside and begins to rub my feet, his thumb digging into my sole. “I think I love you for this alone.”
“Yeah, my thumb skills are impressive.”
I send him a smug grin. Yes, he’s good at planting that thumb against my clit and making my world explode. “I should know.”
“You’re such a naughty girl,” he says with a smile. “I love it.”
“I warned you a long time ago that I was.”
“And you weren’t lying.”
“I don’t lie. About anything.” Finished with my sandwich, I set my plate aside and settle back to enjoy the massage. “It’s a waste of time, and then you have to try to remember what you said.”
“It’s a good policy to have.”
“I also don’t waste my time with liars.” I’m looking him in the face now, hoping he understands what I’m saying. He stops rubbing my foot, reaches for my hand, and tugs me into his lap, cradling me close.
“I’m not a liar either, sweetness.” I wrap my arms around his neck and hold on tight. Is he really here? Is this real? His hands are firm and warm over his T-shirt as he rubs them up and down my back. “But I do notice that you’re a thief, always stealing my shirts.”
“I like them,” I mumble against his neck.
“Addie, I can’t promise you that there won’t be times I fuck up or that things won’t ever feel broken.” His voice is a shaky whisper, his mouth planted against my temple. “But I can promise you that I will never walk away from us.”
Us.
Not me. Us.
I hug him tighter as tears form at the corners of my eyes. “That’s the best promise you can make.”
My eyes are getting heavy. His arms are strong around me, his breathing is long and steady, and before long, I feel myself drifting.
The next thing I know, he’s lifting me and carrying me through the condo, turning off lights and checking that the door is locked before carrying me into bed. He lays me gently on the bed, then shucks out of his jeans and joins me, turning me away from him so he can spoon up behind me.
But I want to see him, so I turn around and thread my legs through his, hugging him around the middle and burying my face in his chest.
“Just go to sleep, baby,” he whispers against my forehead.
“I don’t want to.”
He tips my face up, frowning down at me in the darkness. “Why?”
“Because what if I wake up and you’re not really here? What if this is just the best dream I’ve ever had
?”
“I’m here,” he replies softly. “I’m here for as long as you’ll let me stay.”
Forever.
I’m not ready to say that out loud yet, but damn this feels so good. So right. I missed him so much.
“Sleep,” he says again, and I can’t resist it. My eyes close, and I fall asleep with Jake’s heartbeat in my ear and his arms locked around me.
Chapter Twenty
Jake
I have to convince her that I’m sorry, and that I love her. I need her with me, always.
God, I miss her so much.
I wake, the anguish washing over me, just as it has every day since I stupidly walked out of Addie’s apartment, and then I take a long, deep breath.
I can smell her.
I open my eyes and sit up, looking around the brightly lit bedroom and grin. I’m in Addie’s condo.
And I held her all night while she slept. Well, technically all morning because we didn’t fall asleep until very early this morning, but who’s counting.
She’s mine.
And if I have anything to say about it¸ she’s going to be mine for the rest of her gorgeous little life.
But first things first . . . where the fuck is she?
I pad out of the bedroom and find her in the kitchen, still wearing my shirt, pulling pans out of a cupboard.
“Did I say that you could get out of bed?” I ask sternly. Her head jerks up, those blue eyes round in surprise.
“It’s two in the afternoon, Jake.”
“I don’t give a fuck,” I reply and take her hand in mine, abandoning the pans, and the eggs and bacon sitting on the countertop, and lead her back to the bedroom.
“I’m hungry.” I glance back to see her purse her lips in a pout.
I’m going to take that pout right off her pretty face.
Once next to her bed, I lift my shirt off her and toss it aside, then inhale sharply, taking in her amazing, naked body. “Beautiful.”
Her hands drift down my chest to my cock, and I step out of her reach. “Lie on your back.”
“Bossy,” she says with a raise of a brow, but her breathing has increased and I know she’s turned on.
“Do I have to tell you again?”
Listen To Me (Fusion #1) Page 22