‘What the fuck … what have … you done?’ I slurred, the glass falling from my hand and shattering on the floor as I reached out to try and steady myself.
‘Darling, you really thought the three of us would be happy to accept you cheating on all of us? Not to mention the little slut you’ve been seeing in Hong Kong this week? You forget my cousin Butler works as head of security at The London Domville. When I told him that you’d been cheating on me in Singapore, it wasn’t hard to get footage of you over in Hong Kong, out on a date with your latest conquest.’ Carly laughed. ‘Trust me, we’re all still seething and we’re about to teach you a very valuable lesson.’
‘My brandy?’ I gasped, desperately clutching the drinks cabinet as I felt my legs starting to buckle. O my God, they’d put cyanide or something in it. I was going to fucking die.
‘Drugged with a dangerously large dose of my sleeping tablets and diazepam. Needed, by the way, to cope with my anxiety over my failing marriage. We need you unconscious for what we have planned for you, so no one hears you scream.’
‘Get away from me,’ I yelled, blindly swinging my hands as the light started to dim and I fought to keep my eyes open. I could barely see the multiple fuzzy and grossly contorted faces in front of me and why the fuck could I see the shining steel of a load of kitchen carving knives?
‘You never heard Thai expression, “Better get home or the ducks will have something to eat?”’ giggled Sai.
‘I should carve, after all I’m just the lowly cook and housekeeper he fucks when he feels bored,’ Laura announced. ‘I’m the most qualified to use the knife.’ Hers was the last voice I heard as I felt my body slump to the floor and I blacked out.
I groaned and blinked a few times, the sun streaming through the floor to ceiling glass windows blinding me. Jesus fucking Christ, what the hell had happened, I was in agony. My groin was on fire and my head was pounding. I tried to sit up as I shook my head, trying to come back around, but was immediately pulled back down, forcibly, to my bed. I squinted to the side and cursed to see my hands had been tied to the struts of my four poster bed. Flashes of my last memories before I blacked out started coming back. The witches of fucking Eastwick had drugged me, but I was still alive. I guessed I should be grateful, considering I’d thought they were poisoning me.
‘Fuck,’ I moaned, why the hell did my crotch hurt so badly and why did I feel all wet and sticky? What had those crazy bitches done to me? I opened my eyes fully and lifted my head to look down at my torso. It took a moment to register that the hysterical screaming I could hear was coming from my mouth, as I looked at the carnage below my waist. The sheet draped over my privates was covered in bright red congealing blood, but worse was the sight of the blood stained carving knife and a severed penis lying next to it. I started to hyperventilate between the screams for help. What the fuck? They’d cut off my cock?! I felt the room spinning as I fell back on the bed, yanking at my restraints, screaming at the top of my lungs, praying someone would hear me. They’d cut off my cock! I must be dreaming, no way would they have done that. One more glance, through a face contorted with nerves and horror, confirmed my fears that they had. They’d turned me into a fucking eunuch. I felt my body buck as I vomited all over myself. Shit, I was going to pass out from the pain and shock. I was going to fucking bleed to death before anyone found me.
‘Charles, Charles, can you hear me?’ I was vaguely aware of a faint voice calling me as I began to sob involuntarily. I had no idea how long I’d been lying here, tied to my bed, feeling the life slipping away from me. Every time I came around and looked at the sight of my mangled and bloody cock lying next to that knife, I’d thrown up and passed out again.
‘Help me,’ I mumbled. ‘Please help me.’
‘Charles, it’s Zena. You’re safe now. It’s ok, we’re on our way to the hospital.’
‘Zena?’ A small wave of relief ran through me. I wasn’t going to die here, alone, tied to the bed. That relief was soon dampened when I remembered what those evil bitches had done to me. I may as well be dead if I couldn’t ever have sex again. I opened my eyes, trying to find her, needing some consolation from a friendly face and realised I wasn’t tied to my bed anymore. I was in an ambulance, with a drip attached to me and two paramedics checking my vitals.
‘I’m here,’ she smiled, stroking my hair, which was damp from sweating with panic. ‘I’m so sorry I didn’t check on you sooner. I came to look for you when you didn’t show up for work this morning and let myself in. Christ, you gave me one hell of a shock when I found you lying there like that.’
‘They … they cut off … my …’ I felt tears rolling down my cheeks again. Sex was everything to me and look where it had got me, I might never be able to fuck again. Zena surprised me by bursting out laughing.
‘Charles, relax, your manhood is still firmly attached to you. No one cut off anything. You’re going to hospital for dehydration from no liquid since they left you tied up on Saturday, and because you emptied the entire contents of your stomach all over yourself. It seems that they put a very realistic butchered dildo on the bed, then covered it, and the sheet covering you, in pigs blood, along with a bloody carving knife to teach you a lesson.’
‘I’m not … I’ve not been …’ I tried to take calming breaths as I held her gaze, trying to ascertain if she was being serious, then yelped as she grabbed my crotch through the sheet and squeezed hard.
‘Feel that?’ she asked with a raised questioning brow.
‘Fuck yes!’ I groaned, the biggest wave of relief and happiness hitting my body at once. ‘Thank God for that. I’m still whole.’
‘And getting hard,’ she muttered, releasing me and slapping my arm with one of her scowls. ‘Have you learned nothing from this little lesson? Your cock is what got you into all of this trouble.’
‘Why does it still hurt so badly? I feel like I’m on fire down there,’ I moaned, trying to lift the sheet, just to make sure with my own two eyes that everything was intact and in working order.
‘Hmmm, well you’re going to need to see a tattoo removal specialist. You now have “Steer clear, cheating arsehole with syphilis” written in English, Thai and Malaysian, just for added emphasis, tattooed across your pelvis. O, and a crude pigs face tattooed on your actual shaft.’
‘What the fuck?’ I exclaimed sitting up and lifting the sheet. Even looking at it upside down it looked like a five year old had got loose with a load of thin black marker pens, but the markings were raised and red, dried blood sticking to them.
‘On the bright side your manhood remains intact, though until you get those tattoos removed, I doubt anyone will want to go near it again,’ she winked. I didn’t object as one of the paramedics pushed my shoulder to make me lie back down. Jesus! An embarrassment those tattoos might be, but in comparison to what I thought had happened, I’d live with the bloody things forever if I had to.
‘I sincerely hope that you learn a lesson from this,’ Zena warned. ‘One woman at a time, if anyone will have you now.’
‘Fuck, Zena. I’ve screwed up so badly,’ I groaned, rubbing my hands over my eyes.
‘Understatement of the year,’ she laughed, taking one of my hands and squeezing it tightly. ‘What went wrong with Alana, you were so infatuated with her. She was all you talked about in our daily calls. Was she really just looking for a sugar daddy after all?’
‘No,’ I replied, sighing heavily. Alana. I wanted to hate her so much, but I couldn’t. I’d even dreamed of her while I’d been lying there, imagining I was dying.
‘Then what?’ Zena prodded. I beckoned for her to come closer and whispered the truth and my reaction to it in her ear, wondering what she’d make of it. I trusted her implicitly, I knew it wouldn’t go any further and I needed someone to share this with. My head was completely fried from going over and over it all trying to decide how I really felt, if I could really handle the fact that I was still attracted to a guy.
‘So?’ she replied
, gracing me with another of her scary looks. ‘Until you found out the truth you were falling in love with her, she didn’t have to tell you and you’d have been oblivious. Ok, she’s a little different, so would you have been if your three ex conquests had actually severed your penis. Would you have been hurt if a woman who you thought had fallen in love with you, ran away as fast as her legs could carry her when she found out you weren’t quite what you seemed? That’s not love, Charles. Love is unconditional and it comes in many forms. No one should judge anyone for where they find it and it’s not like you need to tell anybody else. It’s your own private business.’
‘But she’s not a she, she’s a …’ I broke off and shook my head, barely even able to vocalise it without being ashamed.
‘She was, she’s not anymore. She must have cared for you very deeply to trust telling you and look how you treated her, fleeing back home. It’s worse than the way you treated those three women. I’ve stood by you over this fiasco this last week, but if you don’t man up and fly back to Hong Kong when you’re better, and sweep her off her feet, you’ll definitely be looking for a new assistant. Honestly, I warned you when I took the job no personal business and on top of dealing with your conquests, I’ve had to strip your blood, vomit and urine soaked sheets and see your damn naked penis. Do you have any idea how traumatic that is to a lesbian?’
‘A what?’ I spluttered, looking at her aghast.
‘As I said, love comes in many forms and private lives really can stay private if you want them to,’ she smiled. I squeezed her hand, grateful that she’d shared something personal to put me at ease. ‘As well as clearing up the mess that was your office, I’ve arranged for you to have two weeks off work with a burst appendix.’
‘I don’t have an appendix, it was removed when I was eleven.’
‘What sort of assistant would I be if I didn’t know that?’ she grinned, with a wink. ‘But no one else in the firm does. So now you can recover from this trauma and you have plenty of time to go and find your unconventional love. I have another date with a super-hot, blonde, leggy Australian tonight.’
‘You’re quite the assistant, Zena. As soon as I’m back at work, you’ll be getting that raise.’
‘I’d better, or I’ll finish off what they started,’ she warned, with a pointed finger.
I stood in The Domville lobby and ran my free hand through my hair. I’d spent a week holed up in my suite, licking my wounds, having the first of many sessions of painful laser tattoo removal treatment done. I’d decided to leave the pig on my cock, as a permanent reminder that I had actually been one. Carly, Laura, Sai and Alana had all deserved to be treated far better than I’d treated them, but I’d definitely learned my lesson. Thinking you were going to die, or worse that you might have to live with a stump for a cock, was a fast, sobering and valuable lesson indeed. It only made what Alana had willingly done, seem even braver in the harsh light of day. I’d been sick and felt my life was over just at the thought of having lost my cock. To choose to remove a part of yourself, because you felt so strongly that it wasn’t you? I knew I couldn’t have been so brave if I’d been in her shoes.
I shook my head as I thought of all the research I’d done this last week into gender reassignment, including the psychology behind it. What she must have been through, all the hormone treatment, the painful surgery and the regular stretching of her artificial vaginal walls after. Not to mention losing her family who couldn’t accept who she was anymore. Except like she’d said, she hadn’t changed, not on the inside, it was all superficial. She was who she’d always been. I was actually ashamed of my reaction when she’d told me. It must have taken so much courage for her to be honest with me, I’d probably never have guessed if she hadn’t, and how had I repaid her for honesty that I’d been unable to show to my own wife? I’d screamed at Alana and thrown her out of my suite. My heart leapt into my mouth as the lift opened and she appeared, nervously wringing her hands, the manager of The Hong Kong Domville escorting her towards me. I’d only landed back in Hong Kong about an hour earlier and on arrival I’d instructed him to bring her to me, requesting that he not let her know who had summoned her, or why. Part of me was worried that if she found out I was back here, she’d refuse to see me. I wouldn’t have blamed her after my appalling reaction. She didn’t look up as he guided her by the elbow, stopping just short of me. I gave him a nod of gratitude and he stepped backwards, giving us a little space. I noticed all the reception staff rubber necking, trying to see what was going on.
‘Alana,’ I murmured. I heard her take a shocked breath, then she slowly lifted her head to look up into my eyes, fear filling them immediately. I knew she must be thinking that I’d come to get her the sack, so I quickly produced the bouquet of red roses I’d been hiding behind my back and handed them to her.
‘Char … Mr. Ponsonby,’ she whispered, her voice and hands trembling as she took them from me. I immediately dropped to one knee in front of her and took her hand.
‘Forgive me, my love. I was a fool. This last week away from you has made me realise that I don’t care where you came from, or how you got here, I love who you are now,’ I nodded, hoping she understood my deliberately ambiguous references to her gender reassignment. ‘If you can forgive me for being so short sighted, for reacting badly to finding out who you were, I promise to spend the rest of my life making it up to you. I want to start by helping you pack your bags and taking you back to Singapore with me now, as my girlfriend. I have a new housekeeper in place, an old and ugly one so there’s no reason for any jealousy,’ I teased as she blinked down at me, shock etched on her face. ‘So, you can start applying for business school as soon as you arrive. I’ll make sure you’re provided for in every possible way. Financially, emotionally and sexually. You know my past, I’ve been with many women, never wanting to settle with any of them, so when my heart tells me that I want to be with you, regardless of the truth coming to light, I have no choice but to listen to it. Please tell me that I’m not too late, that I didn’t blow this?’ I implored her with my eyes, and my heart, which was racing far too fast. Zena had been right. Love did come in many different forms, Alan, Alana, I didn’t care anymore. I was in love with the person standing right in front of me.
‘You really mean it?’ she asked, her voice and hands still trembling.
‘I mean it. I’ve been served with divorce papers. I want to take the time to prove to you that I’m sincere about my feelings for you, that I can be faithful to you. Maybe once I’m divorced, if you believe in my feelings for you, we can talk about marriage, but I want you to see the real me first. I want to be as honest with you as you were with me. I want you, Alana, if you’ll have me, knowing how I’ve lived before you and how I treated you. I’m ashamed of myself, but I promise I’m going to be a better man, for you.’
‘A wise man once said to me that it didn’t matter who you were yesterday, it was who you were today and tomorrow that mattered,’ she nodded, with tears of happiness in her eyes, her voice now trembling with pure overwhelmed emotion instead of fear. ‘And though you hurt me very deeply with your reaction, I have received so much judgement in my life, that I find I am now more tolerant of flaws in other people. You were confronted with something unexpected and reacted from a place of hurt over something you didn’t understand. Everyone has flaws, Charles, but it’s what we do when we realise that they don’t have to define us, that makes us who we really are. If you promise me that you can get me a job in Singapore if things don’t work out, then yes, I’d love to come and give a relationship with you a try, Charles Ponsonby.’
I had to choke back some tears at her gracious acceptance of my apology. She was the most non-judgemental person I’d ever met. She was going to make me want to be a better man for her, to live up to her ideals. I stood up to grab her, spinning her around in my arms, kissing her as the whole hotel lobby watched and broke into applause at our public display of affection.
To think it had taken me a
lmost getting my cock sliced off to bring me here, back to the first person, or woman as she was now, that I’d ever truly loved.
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The Domville 5
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The Shrewsbury Domville sits proudly in the middle of the rolling Shropshire hills. Affluent tourists converge on the hotel in peak season, looking to explore the historic town and breath-taking countryside and experience gastronomic delights in nearby Ludlow. The last thing you’d expect to find in this quintessential British setting, was the home for the largest monthly swingers’ meeting in England. Couples and singles alike descend on the sleepy town for the first weekend in every month, looking for new sexual experiences or companions. When Anthony and Tracy Hodgins hear of this and decide to spice up their routine sex life, everything changes.
But was it for better, or worse?
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The Domville 4 (The Domville #4) Page 8