Rainy Day Lovers (The Rocklyns Book 3)

by Alicia Street

  “Hey, I didn’t know you kept liquor in the office,” Roman said.

  “It was a gift from a patient.” Thurman filled the glasses and handed one to Roman. “You need this, my friend, because you have some tough questions to answer.”

  “Well, yeah, why else would I be asking you for a consultation?” Roman knocked back the shot, then said, “But I can see now the best solution is to just keep up the avoidance. Rainy and I know some of the same people, but I can manage to make myself scarce and she’ll eventually find somebody else. She’ll probably get married and that will cancel my options around her and effectively end my confusion as well.”

  “Sounds very clinical.” Thurman sipped his cognac with a pensive expression. After a few moments he cleared his throat and said, “This is the first time I’ve ever seen you seriously twisted up inside over a woman. Usually it’s all fun and games with you giving out glaring signals not to expect any more. I think you really want Rainy. Bad. So cut the bullshit and go ahead and make it real with her. Tell her the truth. She’s going to recognize who you are at some point, you know.”

  “No way. You saw the pictures Sidney took of me. I had burn scars over three quarters of my face. I wore my hair long to try and hide it, but nothing could. I was a freak. It was bad enough I had to see myself in the mirror, much less having her look at my ugly mug.” Roman surprised himself with the amount of bitterness he still felt. He’d thought those days were gone, but maybe they never would be.

  Thurman refilled both of their glasses. “Your voice and eyes are the same. And you probably move the same way.”

  “Sydney changed my nose a bit, so my voice is slightly different. And my body broadened out when I got into my twenties. Remember we’re talking fifteen years here.”

  “You sound desperate to convince me of that. Or maybe convince yourself. Why? What are you getting at?”

  Roman took a sip of the brandy and let the warm burn soothe him. “Because I’ve been thinking of going ahead and starting something with her as the guy I am now. Not bringing up our past.”

  Thurman shook his head. “Sorry, but I smell trouble if you do that.”

  “Why couldn’t I just see where it goes? Maybe I’ll tell her down the road, or maybe I never will.”

  “If you wait too long before telling her and she finds out in another way, it’ll ruin any chance you’ve got with her for the long run.”

  Roman rubbed a hand across his face. Did he want the long run with Rainy? “How can I possibly know if we’d be good in the long run if I don’t get to know her first?”

  “Telling her the truth would be part of getting to know her.”

  Roman clenched his jaw, resisting. Every time Rainy looked at him, he could see desire, even longing in her eyes. And admiration. “But she sees me as this successful guy with power and moves and—”

  “Because that’s who you are, Roman. Are you so sure she’d look down on you because of your past? Did she when you were teens?”

  “What she did was an act of charity for a pathetic loser. I wasn’t the kind of guy she would have dated or fallen for in a million years.” Roman hadn’t realized he’d raised his voice until he saw that wide-eyed look from his friend. “Sorry. Didn’t mean to overreact.”

  “I understand. But that’s one of the questions you have to figure out—is it Rainy you want or are you merely after a chance to redeem some lost part of your adolescence?”

  “You think I haven’t asked myself that?”

  “Well, if you did, what was your answer?”

  Roman sipped his cognac and spoke in a softer tone. “My mom, bless her sweet memory, used to have these kind of mystical ideas about people and fate. A bit much for a medical doctor, but still, I guess some of it rubbed off on me. Because there’s this feeling I get when I see Raina. It’s more than attraction. It’s like some part of her soul touches mine. It’s like we belong together.”

  Thurman poured another round. “Sounds like you could fall in love with her. Or maybe in some way you already have. But as a happily married man, I can tell you that there is no room for deception when it comes to love.”

  “Except in some ways my life now as Roman Burke is a deception. I feel like I still have all these broken pieces inside. Like I’m this shattered object that got glued together and painted with a pretty sheen. And if I make myself vulnerable enough for love, the veneer will crack and I’ll just be left as that damaged creature underneath.”

  Chapter 3

  Raina hadn’t spoken to Shannon about Roman since last September, after the wedding, when she had hoped he might ask for her phone number.

  And he never did.

  She knew Roman Burke had been invited to Tate’s birthday party tonight, and if he showed up—which she doubted he would since he’d know Rainy would be here—she was prepared to give him as cold a treatment as he’d given her.

  Roman had actually sent her a text after she gave him her phone number when he showed up at the green market two weeks ago. He invited her to come to his house and make a healthy meal with him. He’d even sent a follow-up saying maybe they could go out to lunch and talk about it first. After she’d replied that she was game for either one, the next day a text came from him saying he’d decided to hire a cook. Nothing else. No offer of any kind to get together. No apology.

  The jerk. What a cold fish. Who needed a man who gave mixed signals like that? Not her. Done with that one. Guy definitely had some issues.

  Now Rainy was glad she hadn’t yet told Shannon about their supposed date.

  How mortifying would it be to have to tell her sister that the ever-elusive Mr. Burke had pulled a one-eighty on her? Not so different from his approach-avoid behavior when she first met him at the wedding.

  Why hadn’t she taken the hint then? Why did she have to go and make a fool of herself again?

  Suddenly she was gripped in a bear hug and lifted off her feet. Rainy was not usually the giggling type, but she couldn’t help it when her big and brawny and adorable cousin Tucker was around. “Put me down, Tuck.”

  He set her down and grinned, saying, “Congrats, Rainy!”

  “For what?”

  “For quitting a job that was sucking the life out of you. When you moved east, I thought we’d actually get to see you, but every time any of the family got together, I’d ask where you were and you were always working. ”

  Tucker was part of what they’d always called the East Coast Rocklyns, her Uncle Matt and Aunt Sheila’s four sons and one daughter. They owned the Rocklyn Winery where her sister, Shannon, had spent every summer and Rainy had sometimes joined her there. Her dad loved at the winery now, since he’d come east to work with his brother after losing his job last summer.

  “Shannon talked me into it, but the truth is I have no idea what the heck I’m doing.”

  “I’m not surprised to see you so lost right now,” Tucker said, as he led her to a pale blue sectional and sat next to her.

  Rainy loved the huge, airy rooms of Tate and Shannon’s East Hampton beach house. It had an open plan design and sleek but comfortable modern furniture. “You’re not?” She let out a short laugh. “And here I thought I had a reputation for being capable and effective. Guess I didn’t fool anybody.”

  “Actually, that’s the very reason I’d expect you to be spun around. You’ve spent you whole life taking care of everybody else. Shannon and Kip when you guys were kids, even bolstering your dad’s moods, and the few times you came out here for the summer you either got a job or got into some kind of volunteer service program.”

  Shannon strolled over, joining in. “And since she became an attorney I doubt she’s ever worked less than a seventy-hour week.”

  Cousin Kendra, who was also Shannon’s best friend, followed her over. “Are you peeps ganging up on poor Rainy again?”

  “I’m sorry, but my sister needs to get a life,” Shannon said. “And it’s okay to be a little lost while you’re figuring out what you really w
ant instead of what you have to do.”

  Rainy rolled her eyes, not sure what to say to all this. But as she looked at very pregnant Kendra and happy-as-a-lark Shannon, it did seem like they had found what they truly wanted. Rainy had always been the big sister and older cousin these two asked advice from and looked up to, but the roles seemed to have gotten reversed.

  Tucker went on with a story Kendra, but Rainy only half listened. Her attention was caught by the person who’d just walked into the room.

  Roman Burke.

  Damn, he was smoking. The second she saw him a riot of desire shot through her. And of course he saw her looking at him.

  Urgh. She’d wanted to play it cool and snub him. But then maybe it would be better to just act friendly, as if his blunt rejection of her offer didn’t really mean anything to her.

  “Roman, welcome,” Shannon said, vacating her seat on the sofa, which just happened to be next to Rainy. She gave him a hug and led him to that seat.

  Thanks a bundle, sis. Not too obvious. When he hesitated, Rainy got up, offered a quick, “Here, take my seat, Roman. I was just leaving.”

  And she strode out of the room.

  Five minutes later, Shannon was at her elbow. “That was rude,” she said, her voice low.

  “I was only returning the rudeness he showed me a recently,” Rainy said.

  “What? You didn’t tell me saw him. Are you sure it was him being rude, or did you misinterpret something?”

  “Look, just stop trying to fix me up with him. With anybody, in fact. I know I tend to pick assholes, but this time I’m not going to give my time and energy to the wrong man. And that means a man who is full of himself like Roman Burke. We’d be a bad match. We have nothing in common. He’s all about money and ego.”

  “You’re wrong there, Rainy. Yeah, I know he sometimes dates actresses and celebs, but he’s in their circles because he does their Botox or filler injections and does surgery on some of them. But that’s not who he really is.”

  “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  Shannon threaded her arm through Rainy’s and walked her to Tate’s study. “Sit there.” She pointed to a leather sofa, then went to a shelf and pulled out a large book and set it on the glass coffee table in front of Rainy.

  “What’s this?”

  “You know Tate has a few charitable foundations and he’s active with some of the people out here who do this kind of thing. Well, this is a book a well-known photographer made about that foundation I once mentioned to you, the one Roman and his father created and run.” Shannon headed for the door. “Gotta go see to my guests.”

  “The Burke Foundation,” Raina read to herself. And then she thumbed through page after page of before-and-after plastic surgery pictures of children and adults in impoverished neighborhoods in the US and around the world. Disaster victims and people who’d had accidents and some who were born with facial defects. And there was Dr. Roman Burke on one page, sitting in front of some kind of hut, laughing with a little child with bandages covering his forehead and one eye.

  By the time she turned the last page, her eyes were moist. Yeah, she probably would like the guy if he had any interest in getting to know her, but he did not. And she wasn’t going to throw herself at him anymore. Just because he did charitable work around the world didn’t mean he wasn’t a tool one-on-one with women. In fact he probably—

  “How come you’re looking at that?”

  Yeah. Him. Standing over her. Shannon had left the study door open and Rainy hadn’t heard him come in the room.

  She looked up at Roman, ignoring her extreme and bewildering attraction to him, and kept her face blank. “Because my sister is trying to convince me you’re not an asshat.”

  Roman’s sexy mouth tweaked at the corners. “Maybe I am. I’m sorry about that curt text. It was just…” He shook his head. “A really busy day.”

  Rainy wanted to groan at his cringing excuse. She didn’t need to be brushed off one more time. “That was four days ago. But hey, we’re good. It’s okay. I’m sorry I was so pushy. I get that way sometimes, so my siblings tell me. Just forget the whole thing.”

  She stood up, ready to walk out of the room, leaving him in her wake again. Why should she give him the time of day when he made it clear he didn’t want to know her at all?

  But as she brushed past Roman, he snatched her wrist and before she knew it, she was in his arms and his mouth was on hers. His lips were warm and firm, his tongue demanding entry and sliding deep into her mouth as if he wanted to gobble her whole.

  It was not like the kiss she’d given him at her sister’s wedding, a kiss that had sent a tingling through her. No, this was like a five-alarm fire, a volcanic eruption, exploding all her senses at once. She had no clue why, after avoiding her at every turn, he was now kissing her with a desperate passion the likes of which she’d never experienced before.

  But one of Rainy’s problems was that she never stopped thinking, analyzing, working things out. She told herself not to let her overactive brain ruin this moment she had secretly wished for, hoped for. So instead she held on, her knees wanting to buckle, let her hands relish the feel of his strong back muscles beneath his silk shirt, his scent of citrus and cedar, the taste of wine on his lips.

  He cradled her head as he worshipped her mouth, one hand slipping under her blouse to her breast to tease her pebbled nipple. When she heard a whimper escape her, Rainy realized she had given over totally to him, this man who’d insulted her and played the come here-go away game one too many times.

  She pressed the flat of her palms on his chest and pushed away from him, stepping back. Although she was breathing hard, she steadied her voice and said, “I’m not doing this. You like to play games and I do not and will not.”

  He rubbed a hand over his face and blew out a sigh. “It wasn’t a game, Rainy. I had some…heavy stuff going on. And I…didn’t want to start something that would…”

  “You couldn’t just tell me that? You had to pretend you like me and then disappear?”

  “I wasn’t pretending. I do like you. Too much.”

  “Too much for what? A fuck buddy? I’m not fuck buddy material, Roman.”

  “I know that.”

  “And that’s the problem, isn’t it? That’s all you want and I don’t fit the bill.”

  Roman heaved an exasperated sigh. “Please understand, I’ve got a lot on my plate. Aside from my work, I need to spend all the time I can with my father. These are the last months of his life, so every week, every day is precious. And he is an accomplished, successful man who rose to the top of his profession and was used to being in control and calling the shots. So he’s not taking it well being dependent on others and virtually helpless and…failing.”

  Blinking back tears, she pulled him into her arms. She couldn’t help it. A person in need was like an addictive drug to Rainy. A magnet for that person she’d become for her family so long ago, a role that seemed to fit her best.

  Or was it Roman himself?

  “I know it must be really hard for you to be a doctor and yet unable to help him.”

  “It is.” He stroked her back as she hugged him. “Please forgive my erratic behavior, Rainy. I never meant to offend you. The truth is I’m not good boyfriend material.”

  She leaned back and looked up at him. “So maybe we can just be friends.” Not really what she wanted after that scorching kiss, but Raina didn’t do selfish.

  “I’m game for that.”

  She slid out of his embrace and said, “We better get back to the party before my sister conjures up naughty ideas about us.”

  Roman laughed and brushed his fingers along her cheek, bringing her a shudder she had to resist. Make up your mind, sir.

  Trying to change the focus, Rainy said, “So how is the new cook?”

  He grimaced. “I didn’t hire one.”

  “Why not?”

  “A valuable figurine that my father loved went missing and now he does not
want anymore outsiders than necessary coming into the house.”

  “All the more reason it should be a friend. And once I teach you some basics, you’ll be good to go.”

  He gave her a look that said he wanted to kiss her again, but instead he just said, “You’re really bossy.”

  “So I’ve been told.”

  “What time will you be free tomorrow?”

  “I could be at your house by five thirty.”

  “I’ll text you the address.”

  Chapter 4

  After a morning at the Burke Center for Dermatology and Plastic Surgery, Roman drove through the gated entry and along the winding pebbled drive of the Olde Town Southampton estate that had become his home fifteen years ago. The brisk October day carried a hint of colder days to come. He hoped the adoptive father he worshipped would live long enough to enjoy the summer days he loved so much. Roman had offered to take him to Florida for the winter, but Sydney refused to leave the home he loved.

  As Roman rode past the front door of the gray-shingled three-story mansion, he noticed the silver Porsche that belonged to Sydney’s nephew parked along the circular drive. It gave Roman an uneasy twinge in his gut that usually meant something was wrong.

  Was it just because he and Logan Burke would usually butt heads? Or had something happened with Sydney?

  Instead of continuing around to the garage, Roman pulled over and hurried into the house. Three steps into the airy, sunlit, marble-tiled foyer, he saw Logan descending the main staircase. Looking every bit the lady-killer he was reputed to be. His dark hair perfectly cut, as was his tailored business suit. Why was Logan wearing a suit when he spent damn little time working at anything?

  “Hey, Logan. So you actually made it over for a visit.” The moment the snide remark was out of his mouth, Roman knew he shouldn’t have said it, but he couldn’t resist.

  “I visit him every week or even more, not that I have to answer to you.”