Under the Gray Skies

by Jacqueline Druga

  “I can’t believe you’re doing this,” Madison said.

  “Look, I’m gonna be honest with you. I really think your families have already evacuated. They’re already south. I wish you wouldn’t do this. The cold that’s coming is deadly.”

  “If we go south,” Madison said. “Without ever trying. We’ll never find them. Our best hope is to search our homes and hope they left a note or something.”

  “It’s a crap shoot,” I said. “But going home first is the only chance we have of ever getting a hint on their locations. I can’t live the rest of my life wondering about them.”

  “I know my family is waiting on me. So I know if they left, Bruce told me where he went and which way.”

  I could see it on Callie’s face. She understood our plight, but didn’t agree with it. But she wasn’t going to stop us and she was going to do all she could to help. We appreciated that, I appreciated it with all of my heart.

  I suppose it sounded silly or stupid. In reality, really, we were going home to find clues to our families. There was a chance they were still there, waiting until the last minute. There was a chance if they were gone, they left us information.

  All of it was nothing but a series of chances.

  We had to take them. We had to, especially if we wanted to find our families.

  We talked about it a bit more in that tent, then we all headed to the mess hall to get a hot meal before they shut down.

  I could smell whatever it was. It smelled wonderful. The mess tent was warm and we got in line. We were issued a bowl of soup, crackers, a bottle of water and if we wanted it, coffee.

  The four of us headed to a table and that was when we saw Marcy again. She and her family sat at the next table. Only this time, her husband was with them. It made me happy to see he had arrived, until I saw she was crying.

  “It’s okay, see?” Her husband held up a red pass. “It’s red. It has to be going to the same place, right. I’ll just get there a little later. As long as you and the kids are safe, that’s all I care about.”

  Del wiped his hands and stood. “Can you excuse me?” He then stepped to Marcy’s table. “Sorry to interrupt. What pass is that?” He pointed to the pass in Marcy’s husband’s hand.

  “It’s Red Eight-seven,” he said.

  “Here. I’ll trade you.” Del reached into his pocket “This is a Red Seven-Twenty-five.”

  Marcy’s released a gasping shriek. “Oh my God, are you sure?”

  “Positive. I can wait. You need to go with your family. Be with them. That’s important. It’s more important than you realize.”

  Marcy’s husband didn’t budge, but Marcy did, she jumped up and embraced Del. Thanking him over and over.

  He felt uncomfortable about the praise, and that was evident. With his new red pass in hand, he returned to our table.

  “Really?” I said. “That was amazing.”

  He set the pass on the table. “Eh, not really. It’s not like I’ll even use this one.”

  “What do you mean?” I asked.

  “I’m going with you,” Del said. “I need to go. I’ve been on this route. I know which way is best, and where you’ll have problems.”

  “Are you sure?” Madison asked. “I mean, really sure?”

  Del nodded. “I think Bruce would kick my ass if I didn’t watch out for his wife after he helped me. Yes. I’m sure. Plus …” He lifted his fork and nodded to Callie. “We gotta steal that truck. Someone has to knock her big ass out.”

  Madison smiled and laid her hand over Del’s.

  Callie shook her head with a smile and dove into her soup.

  Me, I was still astonished. I had witnessed two really unselfish acts in a short span of time. It left me speechless. I only hoped that I had that in me, as well. The ability to be unselfish. Del and Callie did. It was amazing to know and see that the world may have gone to shit but humanity hadn’t gone with it.

  NOTEBOOK – DAY TWENTY-SIX

  Okay, I wrote you guys a poem. When this is all done, if you read this and we’re together, then you can make fun of me. I just felt I needed to for some reason. Remember, I am not a poet. It might be cliché, but at least it rhymes.

  The Search

  The days go by with the hours, sometimes way too fast.

  The light to guide the way really doesn’t last.

  In the dark of the night, I miss and think of you.

  It’s the love that keeps me going, it pushes me right through.

  There’s a chance I may not find you, my plight may be in vain.

  Know that I’m out looking, trying to find my way.

  I will never give up searching, even if I die.

  Please know I gave my all, under the gray sky.

  Oh, wow, that was really gloomy. I was trying to make it rhyme. Maybe I’ll just erase it.

  I love you

  TWENTY-SEVEN – VENT

  Saying goodbye to Callie was bittersweet. Who would have known that the same woman that frightened us, yelled at us, would have fast become our friend?

  It was like leaving a family member. Only we were her only family remaining.

  The goodbye was not without a plan.

  Callie wrote down the names of our children and husbands. She got descriptions as well and said she would keep looking on her end.

  She told us that we needed to think about heading to the same area.

  “Think green,” she said. “Word is that green is below the equator. Paraguay or Brazil. If we all pick the same color, we should all end up in the same country, right? I mean that was Marcy’s husband’s logic.”

  It was good logic.

  We all agreed on Green. Hopefully we would all get a green pass.

  If that failed, we were to remember her unit. EPAS Unit Nine out of Arizona. Surely they wouldn’t change that and we would be able to possibly find her through the placement of her unit.

  The reasoning was that the military would keep track of its units more than the families they placed on ships.

  Eventually they’d count and register everyone. I believed it. It would just take time.

  Just before the first inkling of light we said our final goodbyes, then Del did his best to knock Callie out.

  I thought for sure she was just going to lie. But in order to make the story look good, she had to at least appear to have been struck.

  Imagine my shock when she told Del, “Okay, hit me.”

  It wasn’t as easy as he thought it would be. He procrastinated, paced, raised his fist, threw a punch and stopped short of striking her.

  Finally, he grabbed a canteen by the strap and giving it all he had, he swung out and nailed her square in the jaw with the solid object.

  It knocked her off her balance for a second, but I think it annoyed her more than anything.

  “Damn it. Ow.” She grabbed her jaw then looked at the blood on her fingertips. “You were supposed to knock me out so I didn’t feel this shit.”

  “I’m sorry. I tried,” Del said. “Want me to swing again.”

  “No!” She snapped.

  “What me to try?” Madison suggested.

  “No. Just … just go.”

  “Are you alright?” I asked.

  “Yeah, I’ll be fine. I’ll fall to the ground here in a bit. Go.” She pointed.

  We took a few steps, I stopped and looked back.

  “Good luck. See you soon.” Callie lifted her hand in a wave.

  We left.

  Our leaving the Kansas camp brought a lot of anxiety. Constantly looking back to see if anyone followed. They didn’t. We were on our toes about it for the first three hours.

  Three hours of continuous movement, consistent light to the day.

  It seemed like the levee of all that held us back finally broke. Set free, a new side of the country, a different view. So many obstacles had been removed. The roads, which only had a light dusting, were clear Life existed and we started to see signs of that as soon as we hit the midway poi
nt of Missouri. Not a lot, but a steady flow of cars moved along the highways. No one was going west to east, they were all going south. We could see them when we crossed an overpass. Our highway was barren.

  We saw only one military vehicle.

  Then all of a sudden, as if in a snap of fingers, we saw why there was the sudden move for the south.

  As soon as we hit the interchange at St. Louis, everything changed. I’m sure there was a gradual switch before hand, but it was frighteningly upon us before we were ready.

  “My God,” Del said. “It was cold and snowy when I passed through here last week. But nothing like this. Nothing … like this.”

  The sky darkened again, and a lightning storm brewed fiercely above. Everything went from gray to a bluish white. Buildings in the distance appeared frozen and desolate. They looked old, as if abandoned for years when it had only been days. A fine snow, more like ice crystals swirled and danced in the air. Trees that were in full bloom looked as if they were dipped in liquid nitrogen, leaves frozen where they were until the wind shook the trees causing them to fly and shatter wherever they landed. The roads were slick and we didn’t realize how much until a gust of wind sent us sliding across the road. I was the one behind the wheel, my heart sunk but I regained control as my instincts for winter driving kicked in. I braced for treacherous spots, slowing down, but I wasn’t ready for that wind. Each time it blew we felt it in the Humvee, the heater struggled to keep us warm and it was so cold, every so often it would instantly frost the windshield.

  Whatever front rolled in, did so fast, and with a vengeance.

  It was completely clear why Callie’s orders were changed.

  It was change, or die in the weather. That scared me.

  Driving was dangerous, it worked in our favor that there were no other cars on the road.

  I thought about stopping. In fact we discussed it. However, we weighed our options. While I feared driving in the storm, I feared stopping more. We stood a chance of not only pulling over, but freezing over.

  We pushed on.

  It was still early, we made good time up to that point and only had a hundred and fifty miles to go until we reached Madison’s home. Even at a much slower pace, barring any problems, we would get there before dark.

  <><><><>

  The drive was silent and slow. My hands hurt from squeezing the wheel and my back ached from being tense and leaning forward the whole ride.

  But we arrived.

  We passed the abandoned camp just before we hit town. It had been abandoned so fast the tents still remained. Most of them had blown over and were frozen. They didn’t even move with the wind. Tables, chairs and cots were scattered everywhere.

  “They just pulled out this morning,” I said. “Didn’t they? Isn’t that what Callie said? They were pulling out this morning?”

  Del shook his head. “I don’t know. Kansas was pulling out. Maybe they left yesterday. It had to be. This didn’t hit that fast, did it?”

  It was at that moment I saw the look on Madison’s face.

  She looked worried.

  “They left,” Madison said. “They had to have left. I’ll kill him if they didn’t.”

  I looked once more before we drove beyond the camp. “I’m willing to bet they did. We’ll go in the house, look for a note or something, and then move on.”

  Madison nodded.

  Something was different when we drew nearer to her neighborhood. There were cars parked. While there was no sign of people, there also was no sign of any rush to leave. Could they all have walked to the camp? Was that possible?

  Madison’s street was no different. After following her directions of, ‘turn here, no turn up there’ we arrived on her street. It looked as if everyone was just settled in for a cold winter’s night.

  “Last house on the end,” she said. “Oh, God, they haven’t left yet.”

  Sure enough, there was a SUV in the driveway.

  “Maybe they took the military bus,” Del said. “I know Bruce is good with cars, but if the cold got his, he probably took the boys to the camp.”

  I parked in front of her house.

  “He boarded up the living room windows,” Del said. “Probably sealed off a room. They weren’t like that when I was here.”

  Madison grabbed the door handle. “Then they’re still in there.”

  “Madison, wait …” I tried to stop her.

  When she opened the door, a gust of cold blasted in and she wheezed loudly, closing the door quickly.

  “Cover your mouth and face,” Del instructed. “Lacey, leave this running. We can’t take a chance of it not starting.”

  Madison zippered her coat as far as she could, took a deep breath and opened the door.

  She was filled with enthusiasm to run to the house, convinced that Bruce and the boys were there.

  I hoped they weren’t. If they were, they needed heat, and I didn’t see any smoke to indicate there was warmth in the house.

  I stepped out last, just about the time Madison made it up her walk and to the front door. Del was right behind her. It was hard to focus. My eyes watered immediately and the cold was biting against my skin.

  Keeping my hand over my mouth to filter the air, I walked up the path.

  The front door of the modular style home was locked.

  “I’ll go around back. See if I can break a window and get in,” Del suggested and walked away.

  Madison bounced from heel to toe, from the cold and nerves.

  I looked at the house. It felt still. That was when I saw the front window, although boarded up was open. A circle was cut into the board, the size of a dryer vent hose.

  “What is taking so long?” Madison asked.

  “It’s only been a minute.” My eyes stayed focused on the hole.

  “What are you looking at?” she asked.

  “Nothing.”

  She looked at the window. “Oh, he made a vent. Bruce is so inventive.”

  “There’s no steam, smoke or heat coming out,” I said.

  “The room is small. To conserve, he probably just doesn’t have it on now. Good call.” She walked over closer to the window.

  “Good call on what?” I asked. “What are you talking about?”

  Madison leaned closer to the circle. “Bruce!” She screamed into the hole. “Bad Bruce. Caleb! Mommy’s here. Open the door.”

  While she called into the hole, the front door opened.

  I thought, when I heard it, that everything was all right.

  Until I spun around and saw it was Del.

  He looked at me and shook his head.

  What? Why was he shaking his head? Were they not there?

  After a second I realized that look on his face wasn’t because they weren’t home.

  “No.” I said softly.

  “Oh, good, you got the door.” Madison reached for the screen porch door.

  “Madison,” Del said softly. “Don’t go in there.”

  “Why not? I have to go in,” Madison said as if he were silly. “I have to see if they left word.”

  “They didn’t.”

  “I don’t understand,” Madison said. “It’s cold, step aside.”

  “Madison please.” He held out his hand to her. “Don’t go in.”

  “Are they there?”

  “They are there.” He lowered his head.

  “Then I need to go in.” She rushed inside.

  Del raised his eyes, they were glossed over. Immediately my insides shook and a sickening knot formed in my stomach.

  “No,” I said.

  Del nodded.

  I backed up and a range of emotions swept up my body causing a burning sensation in my chest. I wanted to vomit. My heart broke for Madison. How did it happen? Del had just seen them. They were fine. Madison was so hopeful and optimistic. It couldn’t be. No way.

  Maybe he was mistaken, maybe he was wrong maybe they were sleeping … I thought, staying positive, until I heard the long, gut wre
nching cry from Madison.

  A single scream that was mixed with a sob deep from the soul. That scream said more than any words, it struck more than any physical blow. I knew at that instant, her journey had come to an end … Madison’s family was dead.

  TWENTY-EIGHT - XOLOTI

  Sorry wasn’t enough. There wasn’t a strong enough word in the English language to describe what I wanted to convey to Madison. The last thing I wanted to do was go into the house and see, but I had to, for Madison I had to go in there.

  Without a doubt, I believed Bruce was waiting for her. Madison was absolutely correct when she said he was resourceful. He had a plan.

  He sealed off the living room, lined it with insulation and built an impressive wood burning heater. He created a vent system using a hose that went to the hole in the window.

  But something went wrong. Something very simple went awry.

  It was a heartbreaking scene. Bruce was on the reclining chair with a blanket and the two boys were on the sofa. Each taking an opposite end. All of them looked peaceful, as if they were sleeping. Eyes closed, resting position, completely unaware that every breath they took was killing them. The house was cold and their bodies were frozen, they weren’t decomposed and looked unlike any bodies we had seen.

  From what Del and I determined, the back hose on the makeshift heater was knocked off and Bruce and the boys passed away in their sleep, more than likely from carbon monoxide poisoning.

  The cat, we believed was the culprit. It was the only explanation because Bruce and the boys were across the room from the heater and the gray and white cat lay dead a few feet from it.

  It was hard to believe that someone could be so meticulous about the room and have a faulty hose.

  Bruce knew what he was doing. He just didn’t expect for the family pet to knock it off.

  What made the scene even more devastating were the pictures and notes that the boys had made for Madison. They were waiting on her, ready to greet her.