In Too Deep (Wildfire Lake)

by Skye Jordan

  I leave the store and walk toward my car, head down, shoulders heavy. Seems like the perfect time to call my parents, I’m already pretty close to rock bottom at the moment. And the vacation extension I requested from my boss is just about over.

  I dial my Mom’s number, and she answers, sounding rushed. “Hold one second, Laiyla, I’ll conference in your father.”

  I realize this is bizarre behavior. I didn’t learn this until I left for college and discovered not all parents conferenced with their children. Early on, I chalked it up to being an only child, but later in life, I discovered it was more of a manipulation tactic, teaming up, two on one. But I also know that many other successful parents barely speak with their kids, leaving them adrift, so I do appreciate the fact that they not only answer every time I call, but they both drop whatever they’re doing to speak with me.

  “Hey, sweetheart,” my father says when he’s on the line.

  “Hi, guys. I don’t need a lot of time. I just wanted to let you both know that I’ve made a decision about the marina.” I barely sip a breath before pushing on. They’ll ambush me if I give them the chance. “I’ve decided to renovate the houseboat rental business. I’m fully aware that neither of you thinks this is a good idea, but it’s what I really want. It’s important to me for a variety of reasons. This is going to be a big project, and it’s unrealistic to think I could handle it from Los Angeles,” I wince as I continue, “so I’m going to need a leave of absence. If that’s not possible, I’ll have to resign.”

  I stop walking, bracing myself for their reaction. My mother stutters. I’ve never heard her stutter in my entire life. My father picks up the slack.

  “Sweetheart, we understand you have a sentimental attachment to the property…”

  I lower my phone, drop my head back, and exhale at the sky. Then count to ten. When I lift the phone and listen again, my mom has jumped in.

  “Laiyla, you have a very important role here, and we can’t just give you time off without filling your position. And when you’re done, there’s no telling where you’ll fit into the corporation. You’ll lose all the momentum you’ve made…”

  I lower my phone, drop my head back and exhale at the sky. Again.

  I count to ten. Again.

  Then to twenty.

  My gut aches like I’ve had a vicious flu.

  I take a deep breath and put the phone back to my ear, then raise my voice to cut them both off. “Guys, I totally understand your reservations and I understand that I can’t keep my job at Saxon. I’m fine with that. Please trust in all you’ve taught me. I’m going to make this a success, just like every other project I’ve taken on. I’ve got to go, but I want you to know that I love you both, and I hope you can find a way to accept my decision.”

  I tell them I love them one more time and disconnect as my mother is sputtering again.

  “Ah, God, that was so awful.” I feel emotionally and physically sick. I bang my forehead with my phone until I reach the car, but I can’t bring myself to get in just yet. The thought of going back to the property to face an indifferent Levi and the stress of cutting ties with my parents leaves me hollow, and I sit on a street bench instead.

  It’s quiet with an occasional car but no foot traffic, so I close my eyes and tip my face to the sun and use one of Chloe’s prayers. Yeah, I’m that desperate.

  Under my breath, I murmur, “Okay all you angels up there, Archangel Michael or Gabriel or whoever the heck is in charge, I need a miracle here. A real miracle. Please give me a sign that I’m headed in the right direction.”

  I open my eyes and draw a deep breath. My lungs fill completely, and it’s a delicious sensation. Did the prayer work? Did quitting release me? Or did I just pull myself out of a funk by letting go of stress? I don’t know, and I don’t care. I’m just happy to have some tension out of my body. I still feel bruised and battered, but at least I can drag myself back to the lake.

  I pull my keys from my purse and stand.

  “Laiyla?”

  I glance toward the woman’s voice, and I find myself looking at Brianna, Levi’s youngest sister and three years my junior.

  Fuuuuuuck.

  I feel like one more hit will take me out at the knees, but I work up a tired smile. “Hi, Bri.” I scan her big belly. “You look amazing. Congratulations.”

  She rushes toward me, and for a split second, I wonder if she’s going to attack me. I may have even flinched, but she pulls me into a bear hug, which I’m not prepared for. I’m so relieved she’s glad to see me that I hug her back, despite the awkwardness of her belly between us.

  She pulls back and grips my biceps, her smile electric. “It’s so good to see you. I’m so glad you’re back in town. I’ve missed you.”

  And she hugs me again.

  “Do you have a minute to chat?” she asks, pulling away.

  My next smile is effortless. “Sure.”

  We sit back down on the bench, and I chuckle at her belly. “Your second, right?”

  “Yes. I have a two-year-old boy at home.”

  “Pictures?”

  “Of course.” She pulls her phone from her purse, and we flip through a dozen photos of her husband and son, then her extended family, and Levi’s face flips in and out of the photos.

  “What a beautiful boy.”

  “Thanks.” She pockets her phone and refocuses on me. “Are you married? Kids?”

  “No and no.”

  Something flits through her gaze and she nods. “Levi either.”

  “Why are you being so nice?” I ask. “I mean, I’m sorry, I’m just shocked, I guess. Seems everyone else hates me right now.”

  She gestures away my concerns. “Oh, Lucy is just bitter that you left and did everything she wanted to do, travel, you know? Trina,” she says, referencing her middle sister, “is indifferent. With three kids and one on the way, she doesn’t have the energy for much of anything. Mama and Daddy will always love you for pulling me out of the lake.”

  “Well, that’s good to hear, but I was talking more about locals. O’Malley tried to throw me and my friends out of his restaurant on our birthday, and I’m turned down every time I try to get something done out at the lake. I was just refused service by Mecklenburg Paving and Exterminators Plus.”

  Her face drops in a frown. “What? Oh, no, that’s not happening on my watch. Let’s just fix that right now.”

  I don’t know what that means, but she hauls her big belly off the bench, hooks an arm through mine, and drags me back into the hardware store, chattering about “people in this town” and “small-minded stupidity.”

  She walks straight into Dan’s office and knocks hard on his desk, making him jump.

  “Brianna,” he says, irritated. “What the—” He spots me behind her, and worry creeps into his gaze.

  “I understand you just refused this amazing woman service.”

  “I’m just busy is all.”

  “You don’t look busy to me. In fact, I talked with your wife today, and judging by how strapped she said you are for money, I very highly doubt you’re busy at all. Unless, of course, you’re busy doing something other than exterminating, and if that’s the case, you can be sure I’ll be standing behind Marcie when she kicks your ass.”

  “Okay, okay.” He makes a stop gesture. “Fine. Mice. I’ll get rid of them.”

  “And you’ll give her twenty percent off because you were such an ass when she came in the first time.”

  “Bri—” he says, clearly annoyed.

  “And I believe you can start today, right?”

  “Fine. Yes.” He looks past Bri to me. “I’ll be out this afternoon.”

  “Thank you,” I say, truly grateful.

  Bri turns, hooks her arm through mine again, and marches me across the street, repeating the exact same scenario at Mecklenburg Paving, only she uses a competing business as leverage and how angry Mr. Mecklenburg would be, hearing his wife turned down a large account.

  We
walk out with a promise of an estimate within twenty-four hours, and I can’t help the shocked certainty that the archangels sent me the miracle I needed in the form of Bri.

  “Well, that sucked my energy,” Bri says. “Sit a minute?”

  “Of course.” We take a seat on a different bench. “I can’t even tell you how much I appreciate your help.”

  “Not a problem. People around here can be stubborn.”

  “Are you still teaching?”

  “Yep, first grade.”

  “Eesh. Bless you.”

  She laughs and nods. “Out for the summer now, thank goodness.”

  I squeeze her hand. “I’ve always thought of you as the little sister I never had. Thank you for not hating me.”

  “I could never hate you.” Her gaze goes distant for a long moment before returning to mine. “You know, you’re the only woman who has ever made Levi happy. I mean, really happy. It was always like a switch flicked on inside him when you came in June, then flicked off when you left in September.”

  She grows pensive. “It flipped off permanently when you went to Paris instead of coming back. Took him a long time to rebound, though I can’t say he’s ever been the same. He’s a lot more guarded now. Can’t seem to hold on to a relationship. His girlfriends always get fed up with his commitment issues and walk away.”

  My mind races back to the night on the boat. To the way he shut down after sex.

  “He’s always loved you,” Bri says, “and I love him, so it only makes sense for me to love you too. Besides, you earned your stripes with me by letting me tag along with you guys when all the other older kids tried to ditch me. Not to mention the whole lifesaving thing at the lake.”

  I skip over the last comment because I don’t know how to address it. I just did what was right in the moment. “You were always fun to have around. It was their loss.”

  “Do you, you know, have feelings for Levi?”

  My heart squeezes hard. “Of course. I always will.”

  She nods. “I know you’ve got an amazing life, traveling all over the world, but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t wish you and Levi could be together again. He’s never loved anyone the way he loved you, and he deserves happiness.”

  I agree, he does deserve happiness. And maybe, I think for the first time in longer than I can remember, so do I.

  13

  Levi

  Every time movement catches my eye near the parking lot, I look up, hoping to see Laiyla. I’m hyperaware of her whereabouts at the marina, although I really don’t understand why. It’s probably just so I can look at her, since it’s really the only unscripted time we have together. I’m either talking to her about the project or I’m not talking to her at all. Somehow, knowing where she is still makes me feel connected to her or something. I’d never voice these feelings because I’d look like the pathetic soul I am.

  Putting distance between us is a good idea. An essential idea. I know I hurt her the other night on the boat, which I didn’t plan or want. But I still find myself wanting to know what she’s wearing, if her hair is up or down, if she’s happy or sad, whether or not she feels as shredded inside as I do.

  It’s Decker’s day to pick the music, so country floats around the marina. Not my first choice, especially when my heart hurts. I’d rather hear some heavy metal, but it’s not my day.

  Inside the Celia Rose, I pry my gloved fingers behind the loosened plastic paneling and start stripping it from the wall, foot by foot. At least I have manual labor to work off pent-up heartache and desire.

  I haven’t been able to think about anything but sex with Laiyla since she stepped foot back in town. Part of me, a big part, thought the need would ease after we had sex, sure my imagination embellished the memories and that, in reality, the sex would be like it is with other women: fine, but not particularly memorable.

  I couldn’t have been more wrong.

  When I reach the end of the panel, it sticks beneath a rusted metal lip, and when I yank it free, a piece breaks off, flies out the open door, and hits KT in the arm, drawing blood.

  “Ah, shit,” I say. “Sorry.”

  She doesn’t flinch, just gives me a really? look, shakes her head, and returns her attention to the engine beneath the decking.

  I’ve got five guys working with me today, stripping boat interiors, prepping for renovation. KT always seems to be underfoot, working on an engine of one type or another. She’s easy to get along with, swears like one of the guys, and fits in with my team effortlessly.

  I’ve had to school my men on behavior, because KT is also incredibly attractive with long, dark hair, light blue eyes, a sweet face, and an athletic body that draws attention in anything she wears.

  With three beautiful women around all the time, I’ve got guys fighting to get in on this job.

  I drag the plastic out and drop it on the pile of debris on the dock. Movement in the parking lot draws my gaze, and I’m finally rewarded with the sight of Laiyla’s car. Some sort of tension I don’t understand leaves my body, and I rest my hands at my hips, watching her climb from the car.

  She meets my gaze and hesitates, as if she’s trying to decide whether or not to talk to me, but we don’t have anything more to talk about, not at this stage in the process.

  Chloe walks off the dock and meets Laiyla at the car, and they speak for a moment.

  “Where are you taking your lazy ass?” KT yells.

  Chloe lifts her yoga mat. “Making friends in town. I’m introducing them to hot yoga. You should try it.”

  She laughs. “Hard pass.”

  When Chloe slips into the other car and zips from the parking lot, Laiyla glances at me again then heads toward Roxie Blue.

  I shake off this awful feeling, a mix of longing and anger and confusion, and head back into the boat.

  “It’s never gonna get better if you don’t work on it.”

  KT’s comment draws my attention, and with my mind back on work, I don’t know what she means. “What are you talking about?”

  Her head comes up, and she wipes her grease-covered hands with a rag. “You need to talk to her and work this shit out. A project this big is going to hit a lot of snags if the two of you can’t communicate.”

  “We’re communicating fine.”

  “Really?” KT lifts her chin toward the Roxie Blue, and we both watch Laiyla leave the boat, head down, notebook in hand, then take an unexpected turn and head along a trail that leads uphill. When she disappears around a curve, KT says, “Do you know where she’s going?”

  “That’s the path to Rainbow Falls.” When KT doesn’t respond, I turn my gaze on her. “What?”

  “She told me this morning she had a new idea for that location. If I were the foreman of this job, I’d want to know what’s going on inside my client’s head.”

  “What new idea?”

  She tosses the rag aside and inspects some kind of gasket. “You’re the guy in charge. Shouldn’t you know?”

  “Fuck.” I pull off my gloves and toss them aside. “I need a swim anyway.”

  I make my way off the dock and follow the path to Rainbow Falls, one of the best-kept secrets of this property and a location Laiyla and I escaped to often so we could be alone. Memories assault me as I take the hike up the mild slope, weaving around corners, across a meadow, and into a rocky outcropping.

  I haven’t been back here since Laiyla left town and I’m struck by the magical quality it still holds. Snow runoff from the Los Padres National Forest finds its way here, April through August, depending on the snowpack the previous winter, and the stream takes a sharp dive off a cliff and into a small pool that’s deep enough to jump into from the cliff edge. It’s as quiet and secluded as I remember. A little piece of magic hidden away from everyone.

  I don’t see Laiyla, but I know where she is. Boulders are clustered behind the curtain of the waterfall, her favorite place to hide. And the only way to get there is to swim. “Laiyla.”

  She doe
sn’t answer.

  “KT said you have a new idea.”

  “I changed my mind.” Her voice comes from behind the waterfall, just as I suspected.

  “You want to tell me about it?”

  “There’s nothing to tell you. Go back to what you were doing.”

  Good idea. Only, I look around, and all I can see are memories. Laiyla and me stretched out on a sun-heated boulder or curled up on the shelf behind the waterfall like she is right now. We spent hours jumping off the cliff and whooshing into the pool below. We brought select friends here. People we knew would obey the rules because we didn’t want Otto to restrict our access.

  And I don’t want to leave.

  “Laiyla, are you coming out?”

  “I’m not a kid, Levi. You don’t have to watch over me every minute. I’m fine. Sometimes a girl just needs some time alone.”

  “That’s a no,” I mutter, even as I lean down to unlace my boots and take off my socks. I leave them beside hers, along with her notebook and pen.

  There’s no easy way to get into this water. Even when the temperature outside is over a hundred, the iciness of this pool always bites, so I take the plunge and just dive in. The cold shocks my system, but I’ve adjusted by the time I make it under the waterfall and find Laiyla exactly where I knew she’d be, sitting cross-legged on the highest ledge.

  I push up on the edge of a rock and climb out of the water. My jeans, now heavy, tug low on my hips. I’m about to pull them higher, but there’s something about the way Laiyla’s looking at me that stops me.

  “You need to start wearing a shirt on the job,” she tells me, sullen and annoyed.

  “I think that’s the least of our problems.”

  “Maybe for you.”

  I laugh, and it feels good, but not for long, because I’m reminded that we’ve both been miserable since we had sex on the boat. Fucking rocking sex too. I get hard just remembering. “Are you coming down to me, or do I have to come up to you?”

  Her gaze goes from annoyed to surly.

  “Up to you it is.” A few quick moves, and I ease to the large ledge beside her and lean my back against the cool rock. The ledge is five feet deep, so I stretch my legs out and relax. We’re both silent for several long moments, and I feel like I’m nineteen again, wanting her so bad, my teeth ache.