My Kind Of Country: The Complete Series

by Michelle Thomas

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  CHAD

  Despite being filled with promotional events and endless hours in the recording studio, Chad found his days still managed to drag on, leaving him too much time to ruminate and not enough time to do anything about it.

  Not that he knew what he would do about any of it, anyway. The more he analyzed Katie and Jay from his vantage point, the more confused he got. There were conflicting signals from both sides: Katie seemed hell-bent on sticking by Jay despite admitting she missed him, and Jay seemed determined to keep Katie as his own despite having already left her once—for Chad’s ex, no less—and lacking trust in her.

  Why couldn’t either of them see how deranged their relationship was? He knew his own opinion was biased, caring little about how anything affected Jay, and being more invested in Katie’s welfare than he probably should be. It’s funny how that happened after falling in love with someone.

  The whole messy cluster of emotions and uncertainty led him to the present moment, sprawled out across his black leather sofa staring mindlessly at the slip of paper he turned over repeatedly between his fingertips. If he thought about it hard enough, he could still picture Katie’s hand moving effortlessly as she scrawled her cell number onto it. Since then, it’d remained either tucked in his wallet, travelling with him to each radio interview and meeting, or placed beside the papers strewn about his coffee table he’d been scribbling down song lyrics on, like a tangible muse he could consult when needed. He’d written two additional words on that scrap of paper, too, to match one of his song ideas.

  Friends, she’d said. He had been foolish to agree, but just as desperate not to lose her completely. Was he a despicable person for wanting to remain on the sidelines to be there for her? The cracks were beginning to show in the makeshift exterior of her relationship with Jay.

  And then what? When it all came crashing down, he needed to make certain he was there to show Katie she hadn’t lost everything just because she didn’t have Jay anymore.

  She would have him. And he wanted her to have him. Yeah, despicable was a good word to describe him.

  Yet, he did it, anyway. Plucking his cellphone from the table beside him, he dialed the number into his phone for safekeeping. But instead of calling, he texted her. Somehow, the action seemed more distant, less invasive. He knew she was in Canada, anyway, so there was a chance she wouldn’t even have her phone turned on. The roaming charges could add up quickly once the border was crossed. He’d learned that the hard way during one of his first shows in Toronto.

  Hey, it’s Chad. Just wanted to say hello...and make sure you made it into the Great White North okay. He sent the text and let out a long sigh, making sure to slip the scrap of paper back into his wallet. The doorbell-sounding alert of his phone sounded loud in the silent living room, and a swell of happiness flooded through him at the sight of her words.

  Pleasant surprise. Made it here fine. Can you call me instead? Not good with this whole texting thing.

  Chad chuckled as he redialed her number.

  “That was fast,” she greeted him.

  “Faster than waiting for you to figure out how to text.”

  “Easy, Kirkwood. This cellphone stuff is not for the technologically impaired.”

  “I’ll keep that in mind. How was your trip?” He stretched his legs out again on the couch, his arm swung back behind his head.

  “Long. This seems like the day that will never end.” Weariness was shrouding her voice, mixed in with the muffled sound of music.

  “And is the new Carrie Underwood album helping you get through it?”

  She laughed. “I have the radio playing. I need some kind of noise to keep me company here. It’s silent as a tomb, I swear. You kept me company about twenty minutes ago, actually. Well, Chad Ashton did.”

  He bit back a smile. “I’m going to have to talk to that guy about following you around.”

  “Don’t bother. I happen to like that new song of his. He can follow me around anytime,” she chuckled.

  Chad’s ear picked up on another sound. “Was that water splashing?”

  “I happen to be relaxing in the bathtub.”

  Chad swallowed hard, desperate to keep the mental images at bay. “Now, I feel like I’m intruding.”

  “You are. How dare you interrupt my date night with the radio and a bottle of wine?”

  He could practically hear her grinning through the phone line. “So, you like the new single?” It was a feeble attempt at luring the conversation onto safer ground—as far away from the mental images of Katie chin deep in the steaming water of the bathtub as he could get.

  “It’s great, actually. Back to the roots of what country music used to be. Don’t get me wrong, I love listening to the newer breed of artists, but there’s something to be said about the timelessness of a song you can picture George Strait or Alan Jackson singing.”

  Chad didn’t even know what to say. He’d spent years trying to explain exactly that to Liz, and here Katie was trying to explain it to him. “If you didn’t already have it, I would say you’re a woman after my own heart.”

  “My dad and I used to listen to the radio, and he would quiz me on singers’ names and song titles. It became a daily game. I get my love of twangy, honky-tonk country music from him.”

  “That sounds like a great way to grow up. My dad was the one telling me to put the damn guitar away and get a real job.” More bitterness came out in his statement than he expected. “Maybe I should send him a copy of my album when it comes out, just to prove a point.” He let a laugh escape his lips, but it sounded forced, even to himself.

  “Your dad didn’t approve of your decision to go to Nashville, I take it?”

  “My dad sold my one and only guitar—my first guitar—to buy alcohol when I was in the twelfth grade. Supportive was definitely not in his vocabulary.”

  Katie hesitated. “I’m sorry, Chad. I didn’t realize your father was an alcoholic.”

  “I don’t know if he ever realized it, either. Besides, I don’t announce it, so it’s not like you would know. He’s one of the reasons I spent so much time there with Liz, in her hometown.”

  “When was the last time you had contact with your own family?” Katie’s tone indicated she already had a sinking suspicion what his answer would be.

  “I speak to my mom and my sister every few months or so on the phone to let them know I’m all right. And to make sure they’re okay, too.”

  “But you haven’t actually seen them?”

  “Not since I was eighteen and left for Nashville,” he replied flatly.

  “That was more than ten years ago!”

  “Twelve to be exact, but thanks for reminding me I’m old.” His mouth twitched upward.

  Katie exhaled audibly, and he knew she must be trying to make sense of his story. He’d given up on that a long time ago. “You had no one the entire time you were...” Her voice trailed off.

  “I had Liz. She was my rock while we waited for eighteen candles on the cake to appear.” Even now, the admission of how much he’d relied on his ex-wife throughout the years was hard to take.

  “And when she left...” Katie cleared her throat as she approached the subject. “...with Jay, I mean—”

  “That’s why it was so hard to bear. She really was my everything, and had been for so long that I couldn’t imagine continuing on the same path without her. So, it was my turn to leave.”

  “And you headed straight back to her hometown.”

  “The only place I’d ever felt comfortable.”

  “The place you grew up with her.”

  “The place I met you.”

  Silence answered him. Chad was relieved she wasn’t sitting in front of him to see the wry smirk forming on his mouth. He could picture her now, her hair pulled up in a messy pile atop her head, the steam from the hot water rising slowly around her, her arm jutting over the edge of the tub with the wine bottle dangling from her fingertips. And right
now, at that moment, she was thinking of him—the good times, the kiss they’d shared by bonfire light not so long ago—he was sure of it.

  “I should have listened to you...from the beginning. I should have believed you.” Her voice came out weak, laced in a veil of regret.

  He lowered his voice. “It’s okay, Katie. What’s done is done. I should have just told you the truth from the beginning. I should have...done a lot of things.”

  “Me too,” she whispered. “Maybe things would have been different now.”

  He wanted to tell her they could be. He wanted to tell her that they’d both made a series of wrong choices, but that putting herself and Mason through trying to make it work with Jay was the worst choice yet. He wanted to beg and plead with her to stop all the unneeded heartbreak and foolishness and walk away from him for good.

  “We’ve still got the future, Katie. The past is behind us, but we’ve still got the future ahead of us,” he said instead. Hope furled inside him. What he once thought were only cracks in the foundation of her relationship with Jay were actually wide, gaping holes, and the regret and unhappiness was pouring from them with aggressive power, threatening to destroy the entire formation.

  Katie regretted her choice, and she wondered what could have been. That was all Chad needed to keep the hope alive within himself.

  “I’m sorry. For how it all got so messed up,” she breathed.

  “Don’t give it a second thought, Katie.”

  “Where does that leave us now?”

  Chad had a few potential answers, but chose the safest one. “As friends.”

  “Friends.” She repeated the word as though testing it on her tongue.

  “Yes, friends. We were friends before, and we can remain that way still. And I think that, as my friend, you should call me when you get back to Nashville.” He inflected as much nonchalance into his voice as he could muster.

  “I’m not sure Jay would like that,” she admitted, and quickly gave him a vague rundown of the events that happened a few days ago. The thought of that man being angry at Katie made his jaw clench involuntarily.

  “Jay is not allowed to be upset, Katie, especially when he’s the one who brought us together again. I suppose I really should thank him,” Chad quipped.

  “I thought we were over. I thought you and I were done. Why, now, does it seem like no time has passed between us?” Katie sounded distant. He resisted the urge to tell her to put the bottle of wine away.

  “That’s how it is when you’re the kind of friends we are, Katie.”

  “I can always count on you to make me smile.”

  Chad bit his lip to suppress his grin. “Well, when you get back into Nashville and need a reason to smile, you know who to call.”

  CHAPTER NINE

  KATIE

  Katie tried hard to be quiet as she shuffled through the door into Jay’s apartment just before midnight, which meant she ended up making more noise than she ever would have otherwise. She wasn’t even sure her eyes were focusing properly after being awake and in transit from the farm since seven o’clock that morning. But the darkness wasn’t helping the situation, and she groped the hallway wall for the light switch. It occurred to her fleetingly that she didn’t even know if the switch was on that wall, and cursed under her breath for the millionth time for ever having agreed to stay somewhere she was so unaccustomed to. She vowed to pay attention more to her surroundings once the sun rose again in the morning.

  “You’re home.”

  A startled yip escaped her throat and she whirled around to face the voice. At the same moment, Jay flicked the light on, using the switch—on the other wall.

  “You scared me. I couldn’t find the light switch.” She took in his comfortable appearance—plaid pajama pants, a white t-shirt, and tousled hair. He’d been asleep. She rarely saw him like this, always preferring to be all business with little time for downtime. She tilted her head to the side and idly wondered if a few days with Mason had maybe been good for him.

  “Are you checking me out?” A sleepy smile played on his lips.

  Katie shook her head, snapping herself out of her thoughts. “What? No. Sorry, just in a daze. I’m tired, I guess. How was your—”

  “You were staring.” Jay’s grin grew wider as he stepped forward. “And now you’re blushing.”

  “I am not,” she insisted, even though she could feel the heat in her cheeks. “I’m tired.” She stooped to grab the duffle bag from the floor, and Jay quickly eased it out of her hand into his own.

  “I’m just playing, Katie. I’m glad you’re back.” He leaned and pecked her cheek lightly. “Mason has missed you.”

  She picked up immediately on the fact that he hadn’t, but she left her thoughts unspoken. “The feeling is mutual, believe me. Is he asleep?”

  “Has been for hours. He spent the afternoon at Julia’s with her boys again. I think it tuckered him out.”

  Katie turned the lock on the apartment door and shimmied out of her jacket, leaving it hung on the back of the armchair. She’d hang it properly in the morning when she felt she could see clearly. “Why did he go to the neighbour’s place for the afternoon?”

  Jay’s posture stiffened. “I had to go to the office for a few hours to make up for staying home with him the day before. He didn’t want to go with me.”

  Katie suppressed a disappointed sigh, not wanting to argue with him. Evidently, things had not changed. She made to walk past him, and his hand jutted out, flattening gently against her abdomen.

  “Don’t be mad at me.” His eyes were locked with hers. “We’ve got three weeks, and I don’t want to spend it avoiding each other.”

  She nodded her agreement. “Can the three weeks start tomorrow? I can barely hold my eyes open.” She offered him a half-hearted grin, mentally flipping a coin as to whether she believed he would actually spend tomorrow with her and Mason or not. Heads, he wins; tails, she loses.

  ***

  The sun had no sooner begun to peek through the apartment windows and Jay was up and rifling through his closet...for a suit jacket. Katie frustratingly chastised herself for not betting money on that mental coin toss from the night before.

  “It’s the first day into this holiday that you talked me into, and you’re leaving?” She was snapping at him as she followed him out into the kitchen, but she didn’t care. Lack of coffee and little sleep had that effect on her.

  “I’ll make it up to you, Katie.” He pulled the pot from the coffeemaker and poured some into a travel mug.

  “Do you ever get tired of saying that?”

  He whirled around to face her squarely. “I said I was sorry, but I have to work. I have to make up for some of the time I spent here with Mason while you went off to Canada. What is it you want from me?”

  “You said you’d be here, and yet you can’t get out that door fast enough. I want you to admit that this—” she motioned between them emphatically. “—isn’t working.”

  Jay snatched his coffee mug from the counter, stepping closer to her in the process. “You may be right, Katie, but it’s because you don’t want it to.” His gazes flitted across her face, daring her to say otherwise. When she pursed her lips and stared back at him defiantly, he let out an angry chuckle. “You know what? I’m not having this conversation again. When Mason gets up, tell him I said I’ll call him later to say good morning.”

  Katie watched him storm out of the apartment without looking back.

  ***

  “You really shouldn’t watch this show, Mr. Mase. It will rot your mind.”

  Mason giggled, perched in front of the flat screen television as SpongeBob SquarePants dawdled across the screen. He turned slightly, his chin resting awkwardly on his hands, and gave her a goofy grin. “I like it ‘cause you don’t.”

  She tossed the pillow from the sofa at him in jest, and Mason scampered from his laid-out position to his knees, preparing for a playful fight. “We can’t sit here all day. The sun is shining an
d it’s actually quite nice out there. We should do something.”

  The conversation had already taken place a few times in the last few hours, yet it always resulted in the same response. “But there’s nothing to do, Mom.” Mason was beginning to whine. Katie hated to admit it, but she had to agree with him. Unless she was willing to dish out money for the attractions around the city, spend her money in the malls and shops where thousands of other folks were running around in scatter-brained frenzies to do Christmas shopping, or bribe her son into having fun by buying him things he didn’t need, there was little for the two of them to do. Seeing as Katie was rationing what little money she had left from her spring and summer at the farm, and the inheritance her father left her, she was in no mood for frivolous spending just to pass time.

  “Well, what did you and your dad do while I was away?”

  Mason screwed his face up in a scowl. “Dad was in a bad mood the whole time you were gone.”

  It seems not much has changed on that front, she thought immediately. “Even in a grumpy mood, you two must have done something together.”

  Mason answered with a shrug. “Dad had his papers and briefcase and stuff all over the table. He mostly talked on his cellphone and sat there while I watched cartoons and played on my Nintendo DS.”

  “Your dad worked the entire time you were here alone with him?” Frustration built in her throat, along with the guilt she felt at thinking that leaving her son with Jay for a few days was a good idea.

  “We did go out for dinner; that was pretty cool. When Dad wasn’t on his cellphone, I mean.”

  Katie sighed, feeling defeated. “Mason, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize. Did you at least have fun at Julia’s place with her kids?”

  Her son’s eyes widened, beaming with excitement. “Yeah! Bobby and Lucas have some cool video games, and their mom lets them build forts in the living room to play the games in! I watched Bobby play a whole level of Call of Duty and when he won, he jumped up so fast the fort fell down around him!”