Eternal Hearts (A Darkness Within)

by Jennifer Turner

  Tonya looked down the street and squealed. “I gotta go. You said ya used to live here, so I guess it’d be okay to tell ya the back door ain’t locked. But if the blond guy asks, I’m gonna have to tell him I let Toni go in. So don’t do anythin’ bad, okay?”

  Toni nodded. “Okay.”

  She narrowed her eyes again. “You promise?”

  Toni smiled at her. “I promise.”

  “Okay, I gotta go.” She turned and ran off down the street.

  Toni watched as the kids started pelting each other with snowballs. Tonya held her own and took out three boys, who looked to be a lot older, before she finally got hit.

  She smiled at the scene. Tonya reminded her of herself when she was little. Not a day went by when she didn’t do everything she could to beat the boys.

  After watching for a few more minutes, Toni walked around the house to the back door. It hadn’t been the way she’d hoped to go in. The back door led straight to the kitchen, and that was the last room she planned to visit…if at all.

  She sucked in a deep breath, but when she tried to walk up the stairs her legs refused to cooperate. Shaking and terrified, once again she found herself frozen to the ground. All she could do was cry as memories of what had happened to her family washed over her. Oktober had done so much more than just kill her family…

  He’d killed a part of her, too.

  Before they died, even as a vampire, she’d still felt connected to the world. They were her connection. Every time she saw her mother, she fussed over her. She asked if she’d been eating right, if she was making her bills on time, and if she’d found a nice boy yet.

  Toni’s thoughts immediately turned to Drake. She’d finally found the nice boy, but he was best friends with the man who’d put a permanent end to the fussing. Ended the questions, the comfort, the only sense of belonging she’d ever known.

  She wrapped her arms around herself as the tears streamed faster, her breathing came harder. How could everything go so wrong? No matter what she did, she lost everyone she cared about. And even though right now she hated Drake, she still cared about him. She cared more than she was willing to admit to anyone, even herself, and it made her feel like a traitor.

  What would her family say if they knew she loved the best friend of the man who’d killed them?

  Loving them was the only thing that helped her through being what she was. Through the painful change of becoming a vampire, she’d thought of them. During the times when the darkness within her screamed for blood, she’d clung to their faces in her memories. In the moments where self loathing ruled her, when she felt as though she’d never even been human, knowing they were there…pulled her back.

  They kept her human even though she wasn’t.

  But now they were gone. She’d never get them back, and the only other person who made her feel that way was Drake.

  Toni wiped the tears from her cheeks and backed away from the house. She couldn’t do this. She couldn’t go in knowing she might not be able to stay in the city. If she did, and she had to leave again, it would be even worse than before. Because not only would she lose her home again, but she’d lose Drake, too.

  And right now…she didn’t know which would be worse.

  Toni ran back to the street and climbed into her car. She picked up the folder Christian had given her and stared down at the notch where her name had been written. She had to focus on the investigation. She had to find the answers Locke was looking for, and then she would make time to talk to Drake.

  No matter how things did or didn’t work out with him, she had to make sure she had a home to go back to.

  Pulling away from the curb, Toni headed back towards the west side of the city where Stryker lived. Three wolves running around Chicago wasn’t normal. Someone had to have seen something. After all, werewolves couldn’t just appear and disappear without anyone knowing.

  Could they?

  Chapter 16

  Drake sat quietly at the bar missing Toni a little more with every breath he drew. He still felt her faintly inside him, and worse yet, he knew she was hurting. He didn’t know exactly where she was or what she was doing, but he wished he could make her feel better.

  He also wished the alcohol he was attempting to drown himself in would work. He didn’t want to feel the dull ache in his chest anymore, didn’t want to suffer the crushing, suffocating sense of emptiness that had only grown heavier over the last half hour.

  Even the betrayal by Klesa hadn’t hurt this much. It had taken years for him to forget her face, even longer for the pain to finally recede. He didn’t want to guess how long it would take this time. But this time, he didn’t want Toni’s face to leave his memory. He wanted to remember her, wanted to remember every smile, each laugh. She’d treated him like a person, not a killer.

  She’d treated him like a man…not a means to an end.

  She didn’t treat you like a killer because you didn’t tell her the truth. Drake stared down into the darkness of his nearly empty beer bottle. He should’ve told her what he was before he’d even considered sleeping with her, but he couldn’t. To deny her went against everything he felt, everything he knew.

  Drake finished his beer and waved to get the bartender’s attention. When he had it, he pushed the bottle back in line with the dozen or so others. “I’ll take another.”

  The older man looked skeptical. “Are you sure you want another? You’ve already had twenty, young man.”

  Drake chuckled. He’d have to drink well over a thousand beers to get drunk. He was immune to poisons and chemicals, which made getting even a good buzz damn near impossible. Mainly because his stomach just couldn’t hold that much liquid.

  He nodded then pointed at the line. “I’m sure.”

  “You’re not driving are you?”

  “No, Sir. I’ll either be walking or taking a cab.”

  “All right.” The man’s words were begrudging at best, but he slid another beer down the counter. “Just making sure your brain is still working.”

  “I’ll have one too, Teddy,” a voice called from behind Drake.

  Drake turned to see the source of the voice then shook his head. Somehow, he wasn’t surprised. “What’s going on, Brick?”

  “I’d ask you the same thing.” He sat down on the empty stool next to Drake. “What are you doin’ here? And why do you look so bummed?”

  “I’m drinking beer. Isn’t that what you’re supposed to do at a bar?”

  Brick gave a nod. “I reckon that’s what most people do. But most people also smile when they drink. You look like someone just ran over your puppy.”

  Drake sighed. “I lost something important. What’s your excuse?”

  “I’m here because a friend of mine owns the bar.” He motioned to the bartender. “Teddy called me about thirty minutes ago and said a rather large and scary man was down here drinking him out of house and home. So I asked what the lummox looked like. Turns out – it’s you.”

  Drake slowly nodded. This was one of the reasons why Brick was so good at his job. He knew people all over the city, and they always called him whenever something strange happened.

  Brick took a swig of beer then set the bottle down on the bar and turned it a few times, filling the air with a dull scratching sound. “So why don’t you tell me what’s really going on. Did a contract go bad?”

  Drake almost glared, but then remembered Brick knew about his profession, and The Organization. He’d been approached to join about five years ago, but eventually turned the offer down. And to this day, he was the only one who’d been allowed to live afterward. Usually if someone declined, they were executed where they stood.

  Drake pushed the death thoughts aside in favor of considering the question at hand. “Yes, a contract went bad.”

  “Who’s still alive?”

  “Toni—”

  “What?” Brick snapped as he slammed his fist against the bar. “Is that why you interrupted us the other night? I shou
lda known better when you said you’d stay with her. This is some bullshit, Drake. That girl hasn’t hurt anyone.”

  “I’m not supposed to end her,” he said in a hushed tone while he looked around to make sure no one was paying attention to them. “It was a protection contract.”

  “Oh…well…that’s different,” Brick said, his voice thick with relief. “Well if she’s still alive, then that’s good, right?”

  Drake nodded. “It’s very good.”

  Toni stepped into Mutt’s Pub, looking for more people to talk to about the human descriptions of the werewolves. Her questions to the people out on the street hadn’t turned up anything. Not a single person down here had seen or heard anything about them.

  As she cast a glance over the fairly light crowd, she straightened when she recognized two very familiar backs. One belonged to Brick, the other to Drake. Her heart immediately fluttered at the sight of Drake, but her brain harpooned the butterfly.

  He’d still lied to her, and at this moment, she wasn’t exactly sure what to do or how to feel. She wanted to talk to him, but she didn’t even know what to say. Why are you friends with the guy who killed my only attachments to life before I was cursed? Why’d you lie to me about it before you made me feel better than I have in three years?

  How did you ask someone something like that?

  She stared between the two men. What were the chances that Drake and Brick were talking about her right now? If they were, maybe something Drake said could help her find a place to start their conversation.

  Toni closed her eyes and concentrated as she tried to pick out Drake and Brick’s voices. Slowly, the other chatter in the bar dropped away until she heard only them.

  “Wait, I don’t get it. Why do you have a contract on Toni?”

  Drake shrugged at the question. “I don’t really know why the Boss ordered it, but I got it because I live here. Jake said he wanted a native.”

  Brick frowned. “I don’t see why they’d put someone of your skill with her though. Are they just handing out busy work or did she piss off somebody really old?”

  “I honestly don’t know. I originally got it back on Friday night. At first I was hoping I could do it from a distance, but the Boss wanted it close quarters. After spending a few hours with her though, I would’ve been happy to do it anyway. I wouldn’t have even needed a contract.”

  “Uh oh, that’s not good,” Brick laughed. “That bad, huh? I can’t really say I’m surprised though. She has that effect on people, especially men.”

  Drake stiffened when a shock of anger, closely followed by an intense amount of pain, exploded in his blood. Toni was upset and he felt like she was close, but he knew better. After what Clint had told her, he’d be lucky if he ever saw her again.

  “Drake, I…ah…I think you might wanna turn around.” He eyed Brick’s flailing hand on his shoulder before he realized the Texan was staring at something behind them. “Now, man. Now.”

  Drake turned to see what Brick was so focused on just as a thousand emotions surged through him. Toni stood a few feet inside the bar’s front door, hatred blazing in her brown eyes. And all of it, every burning ember, was focused directly on him.

  He watched as her beautiful lips parted then closed right before she turned around and barreled through the doors. Without so much as a sliver of hesitation, he jumped out of his chair and ran after her.

  “How stupid could I be?” Toni yelled as she ran down the alley next to the bar. Her mind was in overdrive, trying to process everything she’d just heard. He had a contract on her? He was going to kill her? How could he?

  She slammed her fists against the brick wall lining the right side of the alley as she screamed up at the night sky. Everything she’d felt from him, everything she saw…it was all a lie. And every doubt she’d had, every awful thing she’d thought…it was all true.

  She rested her forearms against the wall then pushed her fingers into her hair. She couldn’t believe it. She’d hoped she was wrong, hoped she’d just let her fears get the better of her. But now that she knew the truth…

  Toni whirled around when a familiar hand brushed the back of her shoulder. “Get the fuck off me, Drake!” She glared up at him as tears rolled down her cheeks. “Has it all been a lie? Has it? Or was it only Oktober you lied to me about? I know you’re best friends. What did you two do, make a bet on who could fuck me before you killed me?”

  He flinched at her last few words. “There was no bet, Toni. I may be friends with Oktober, but I didn’t find out about your family until Clint told me—”

  “Oh, and I’m supposed to believe that? I’m supposed to believe you care about me when you took a contract to kill me? So was 8-Ball a part of it all to? What about Brick? You sure were sitting in there all nice and cozy with him. God, I can’t believe this!”

  He took a step towards her. “Toni…it’s not what you—”

  “No!” Her vision already sparking crimson at the edges, she reached out and shoved him back. It felt like he was everywhere, all around her, crowding her. “Not more than thirty minutes ago I was standing outside what used to be my house. Can you believe I actually felt like I was betraying my family because I cared about you? And what were you doing? You were sitting in a fucking bar, chatting it up with Brick about how you didn’t need a contract to kill me. Talking about how you’d have done it for free. What? Was I a bad lay? Did I not please you? You know what, fuck you! I don’t care what you have to say. You lied to me and there isn’t a damn thing you can say to change that.”

  Toni jumped when Drake’s eyes flashed black before he turned and slammed his fists into the brick wall of the warehouse on the other side of the alley. “If you would just shut your mouth for two goddamn seconds, you’d hear me when I say I didn’t take a contract to kill you! I took a contract to protect you.” His voice echoed all around her, nearly washing out the sound of the wall as it cracked and splintered.

  Fear tingled down her spine as the shadows in the alley began to warp and twist, writhing in time with Drake’s ragged breaths. Blackness slithered across the ground, its wispy tendrils dancing like charmed snakes at his feet.

  She narrowed her eyes on the shadows. Was this what happened when he got mad? Was this his beast rearing its ugly head? Good. Now he knew how she felt.

  Ignoring the unease in the pit of her stomach, Toni stood as tall as she could. She wasn’t about to back down now. “Do you really expect me to believe anything you say? A protection contract? Please. You must really think I’m stupid. You’re an assassin. Last I checked, assassins don’t protect people, Drake. Assassin’s fucking kill people.”

  He turned around, his eyes brimming with emotions she wasn’t able to place. “The contract on you was for protection, Toni, not to kill you. I do both, it just seems that no one remembers.” He paused then looked around the alley as if searching for something before his eyes finally settled back on her. “As for Oktober, you’re right…I lied to you. He’s my best friend. But he’s also been there with me through the worst fights of my life. He’s taken bullets meant for me, and if it wasn’t for him – the scars on my back would be a hell of a lot worse. I’m sorry he killed your family, but I honestly didn’t know until Clint told me.”

  Toni covered her face with her hands. She didn’t know what to believe. Could someone like Oktober even have the capacity for friendship, or was Drake just lying again? His eyes burned with sincerity, but his words…anyone could say those words.

  Anyone could pretend to care.

  Curling her fingers around her forehead, she pressed her palms against her eyes and tried to suck as much oxygen into her lungs as possible. She needed to breathe, needed to think. His close proximity was crushing her. He was all around her, inside her, overpowering her.

  She lowered her hands. “Why do you have a protection contract on me? Who paid for it? When did it start? Is it over yet?”

  “I can’t answer your questions, Toni. I’m sorry, but I have ru
les to follow. One of which I just broke by telling you I had a contract on you. Another one I broke back up in your hotel room, because for some reason I can’t keep my damn hands off of you. Because for some inexplicable reason, you’ve made me completely lose my fucking mind.”

  “Why did you lie to me?”

  “What was I supposed to say? I’m best friends with Oktober because we both kill people, but I’m sorry he molested you in the bathroom? I’m a killer too, but please, can you find it in your heart to like me anyway?”

  Toni kicked at the loose gravel on the ground. “I don’t really care if you kill people. I may not like it, but I don’t like a lot of things about my life right now. I can deal with what you do for a living. But what I can’t deal with is the fact that you lied to me…right before you fucked me!”

  He staggered back as if she’d shot him. “You don’t care that I’m a killer?”

  “No, I don’t.” She scanned the alley then forced her voice to a quieter level. “We’re vampires, Drake. I’ve killed people, too. And I’ve done my best to accept that it’s a part of this life, but what I refuse to accept…is someone who tells me what I want to hear just so they can use me.”

  He shook his head. “I didn’t use you, Toni. You’d been through enough that night. The last thing I wanted to tell you was that I knew Oktober, especially after what he did to you. Trust me, you have no idea how much I want to rip his throat out for killing your family. I wanna do it even more because he put his hands on you. But it wouldn’t do any good because he can’t die!” He raked a hand through his hair. “And I can’t very well beat him for killing people when I do the same fucking thing, now can I?”

  Toni could barely breathe as tears spilled from Drake’s blue eyes. He pointed down the alley towards the street. “There are a lot of people in the world who feel the exact same way about me as you do about Oktober. Did you ever think of that? Do you know what the most damning part of this whole situation is?”