by Cindy Wilder
“Put me down right now,” I yelled, as I slapped at his ass.
I reached into the waist of his shorts so I could pull his underwear up. He let out a loud laugh.
“I don't like them,” he said, as my hand touched his bare ass.
“Fuck,” I gasped out.
His ass was tight and hard. I had never felt one before. Maybe they were all like that. Okay, I thought. He was so proud of not wearing underwear. I dug my nails into his ass, hoping he would let go of me. It only made him move faster.
“That's it,” he yelled. “You're going down.”
I heard the gate open and close and knew what he was planning. That punk was going to throw me into the pool. If I was going down, then he was going too. I had lived there for twelve years and knew every tiny spot of that yard and that pool. It was where I spent most of my time. Rosie let me swim for hours every day. I watched closely as he walked faster. The second I knew he was there and felt him start to lean forward, I grabbed the waist of his shorts and held on for dear life.
“Fuck,” he yelled, just before the giant splash of both of us hitting the water filled the air.
I came back up from under the water and shook my face, as I wiped the water from my eyes.
“What was that?” I asked.
“I can't believe you pulled me in with you,” he snapped, as he ran his fingers through his wet hair.
“You were the one that let me think you were hurt. That was dirty,” I said.
Rosie walked to the edge of the pool and looked down at us.
“I thought you were helping me, Carrie,” Rosie said.
I could see her trying not to smile. She knew damn well what he had done to me.
“This punk threw me in the pool,” I said with a huff.
“I don't know what she's talking about, Rosie,” he said innocently. “You know I would never do that.”
“What?” I yelled. “Why are you in here?”
“I was swimming,” he said.
“You were swimming in jogging shorts, a t-shirt, and sneakers,” I said.
“I was,” he said, before sucking his lips into his mouth.
“Then what was I doing?” I asked, as I got out of the pool and put my hands on my hips.
The water was dripping from my clothes.
“I have no idea,” he said. “I was minding my own business when you walked up acting strange and jumped into the pool. I wasn't sure what was going on.”
I turned to Rosie.
“He is so lying. I did not jump in the pool. I was in the front yard. He carried me all the way back here,” I said.
“You can't possibly believe that, Rosie,” he said with the cutest look on his face.
Rosie looked back and forth between us.
“When you two are finished,” she said. “We can have lunch.”
“We're finished,” I said, as I turned to walk away.
“This summer is going to be so much fun, Rosie,” I heard him say from behind me.
I had to smile on my way to my room. It really was the most fun I could remember having in so long.
Kyle came and went as he pleased for the rest of the week. I spent time with Rosie and swam each day. She was what I missed most about being home. It didn't matter if I was digging in the dirt, cooking dinner, or just talking with her. She was the closest I would ever have to a parent, and I loved her so much. My dad worked all week, and Laura was gone a lot. We ate dinner together each night. It was the only time we were all together. It usually consisted of Laura going on about her day and how wonderful she was. I did catch her make shitty comments about Kyle from time to time. Kyle swam laps each morning. I would sit and watch him from my window. He caught me one morning. I watched him bend over and moon me. Yep. He pulled his shorts down so I could see his bare ass. It was a fine one at that. He only had a few weeks before his eighteenth birthday. I couldn't imagine his silly attitude having a place in the military. If he didn't straighten that shit out, he would be back home in no time.
Friday night came, and I took my book and pillow and headed for the front porch. It was warm, but there was always a nice breeze right across my swing. I sat back against my pillow and opened my book. That was home. It was my favorite place in the whole yard. I jumped when the front door opened and Kyle walked out.
“Fucking bitch,” he mumbled. “Two more months of hearing your mouth.”
He stormed off the porch, got in his car, and drove away. I knew he hadn't seen me there. I found myself feeling bad for him. He really didn't have it that much better than me, at least not in the parent department.
I was lost in my book. The swing rocked, and the breeze kept me nice and cool. It was so beautiful. I was in my perfect spot. The door opened again, and my dad walked out. He came over to the swing and sat down.
“How was your week?” he asked.
“It was nice. I worked on the flowers with Rosie. They are so much nicer than they used to be. I swam a lot too.”
“Have you left the house?” he asked.
“No,” I said.
“I told Kyle he was to let you use the car anytime you wanted it,” he said. “Is he being mean about it?”
“No,” I said. “I haven't wanted to go anywhere. If I do, I'll go with Rosie.”
“Why don't you want to go yourself?” he asked.
“I just don't. I haven't seen her in two years. Who knows how long it will be before I see her again. I guess that depends on you and mom.”
“You know I want you here, right?” he asked.
I wasn't sure what to say. My dad was never that easy to talk to. It was always about not upsetting him. He worked so hard, and I wanted any time I had with him to be good and free of stress. It was getting old. I was tired of always worrying about what he would think.
“Why?” I asked.
“What?” he asked.
“Why do you want me here? You won't spend more than an hour with me at a time for three months. Why even bother flying me out here?”
“I want you here because I love you. You're my daughter. I've missed you so much,” he said.
It was like he had no idea what I was talking about or why I would feel that way.
“I've been home for an entire week. You said you were going to talk to me that first night. This is the first time we have really spoken. I see you at dinner, but that time is filled with Laura talking about herself. Don't think I didn't notice Rosie eating dinner in the kitchen. Laura better not treat her badly. I'd like to actually spend some time with you. I get that you work every moment of the day. You always have. I would just like to see you. I'm glad I'm here. Rosie is the only one that has ever cared about me. It's been so hard not having her with me. The last two years have really sucked.”
“Carrie,” he said. “Watch your mouth. Does your mom let you speak that way?”
“The worst part about what you just asked me is that you're being serious. That's how much you know about my life, dad. I haven't even talked to you in two years. You don't call or anything.”
He looked at me with the strangest look. I wasn't sure if he was mad or hurt.
“Can I ask you something? Will you be honest with me? I'm sixteen now. I'm tired of the crap,” I said.
“Yes,” he said.
“Why couldn't I come see you last summer? Why haven't I seen you or heard from you?” I asked in a sad tone.
“Are you serious?” he asked.
“Never mind,” I said.
“No,” he said with his jaw tight. “How was your birthday this year? You turned sixteen. What did you guys do for your special day?”
“Nothing,” I answered. “It was a school day. She told me happy birthday and bought me a cake. Mom bought me three new books. She said she wanted to buy more but had to pay the bill for the lawyer.”
I could feel his body tense. His hands were clenched tight. He looked over with a smile.
“I want you to know how happy I am that you're here. I know I
have to work. I'm sorry about that. What about Sunday?” he asked.
“What about it?” I asked.
“I want to do something with you Sunday,” he said.
I looked at him for a second. He was being serious.
“Seriously?” I asked. “You mean like go someplace just the two of us?”
He nodded.
“Uh,” I sat for a moment. “Sure.”
He stood up and looked down at me. I could feel the tension oozing from his body. What the hell, I thought.
“Try not to fall asleep out here,” he said. “I'm not getting any younger, and you've gotten much bigger.”
“I won't,” I said. “I'll be in the house in a minute.”
I laughed and could see him relax a bit. When I jumped up and wrapped my arms around his neck, he wasn't sure what to do. He gave me a small hug and went back into the house. I sat back down on the swing and went back to reading.
I opened my eyes slightly when I felt something brush against my arm. It was dark out. I opened them a tiny bit more to see Kyle covering me up with a blanket. He tucked it in around me. When he stood up straight, I saw him looking down at me.
“Maybe the summer won't be so bad,” he mumbled before turning to walk away.
I slept the whole night on the swing. It was something I had always wanted to do. You know what? It was better than I thought it would be. If I could have moved my mattress out there, it would've been so awesome. I would have slept there every single night.
When I walked into the house, I saw my dad's office door cracked slightly. I felt bad for how much crap I had given him the night before and wanted to apologize. He didn't deserve that. Just because I was upset didn't mean I had to take it out on him. I walked up to the door and moved to push it open when I heard his voice. He was on the phone, and he sounded upset. I got as close as I could and leaned in toward the small opening.
“Where is the car?” he asked in a frustrated tone.
I couldn't hear the other side of the conversation but wanted to hear what he was saying.
“Why not?”
I continued listening.
“What do you mean you sold it? Why would you sell something that was hers? It wasn't yours to sell.”
“I know you're her mother, and I know you make the decisions. You've been making that obvious since the day you left here.”
“Did she even know about the car?”
“You said you were throwing her a party. I sent you a thousand dollars, and you bought her three books. What else am I going to find out? What did you do with the money from the car? It was a brand-new Mustang. You know what, I don't even want to know. I'm also curious what lawyer bills you have. I've flown out there five times for court in the last two years. I've paid every single penny for both of our lawyers. I just can't imagine how you could have lawyer bills. The thing that hurts the most about all of this. Do you want to know? My daughter doesn't think I care about her. After all of the hell I have gone through and all of the money I have given you, she doesn't think I love her. You are worse than I ever thought you could be. You were the one that left me. You took her away from me. I am so done with your shit. Do you hear me? I will pay exactly what the court says. I will not give you another dime. I cannot imagine what you have done with all of that money. It makes me so sick thinking about the way you treat my daughter.”
My mouth was wide open and tears were pouring from my eyes, as I stood there listening to his side of the conversation.
“You will send her each time you are supposed to. If you don't, you will go to jail. I'm done playing your games. She is my daughter. I have missed out on two years of her life because of you. In two years I'll be able to see her anytime I want. She will know it wasn't me who's kept her away. I will not have my little girl thinking I don't care about her.”
“I know I work a lot. That's how you're able to sit on your ass and do nothing. I've worked so hard for what I have. I will not lose it all. I won't go back to the life I lived as a child. There is no way I will let my daughter have that life either. I can only imagine how it has been for her. It breaks my heart to know what I do already. I can't imagine the things I don't know.”
“No,” he yelled into the phone. “You will talk to her in three months. I will have every moment I am supposed to. If I could, I'd keep her here. I won't put her through all the bullshit I would have to for that to happen. I will let you have those two years, but that is all I will give you. I can't believe you did this to her. Goodbye.”
I heard the phone slam down and hauled ass up the stairs. When I got to the top, I slammed into a wall of muscle. Tears were streaming down my face faster than I could wipe them away.
“What the hell?” he asked. “Are you okay?”
I shook my head and pushed passed him to my room. As soon as I was through it, I shut it behind me and slid down it to the floor. With my elbows on my knees and my head in my hands, I let it all out. Minutes later there was a knock at my door.
“Yes,” I yelled between sobs.
“It's me,” Rosie said. “Let me in, Carrie.”
I moved away and reached up to unlock the door. She opened it slowly, walked in, closed it behind her, and reached out for my hands. I put them in hers, and she pulled me to my feet. Her arms wrapped around me and held me tight.
“What happened?” she asked. “Kyle came to get me.”
“My dad,” I mumbled. “I heard him on the phone with my mom.”
“Oh shit,” she said.
I pulled back and looked at her.
“Rosie,” I said with a smile.
I brushed the tears from my face.
“What did he say?” she said.
“So much more than I ever thought I would hear. He even swore. Can you believe it?”
I walked over, sank down onto my bed, and told her everything. Everything she told me was right. I was so surprised. Even Kyle was starting to make sense. They all thought he was raining money down on me when I had never gotten a dime. I made her promise not to tell anyone what I had heard.
My dad let me pick where we were going Sunday. I still couldn't believe we were actually going to spend time together. It was almost impossible for me to fall asleep the night before. We went a museum, out to dinner, and to a bookstore. For having never spent any real time with him, everything flowed perfectly. We talked about my friends at school and what I liked to do. I asked him about work. Since I had been gone for so long, I didn't know much about his company. He had way more than he used to. When we got to the bookstore, I pulled him over to the romance section with me.
“You are not reading these books,” he said.
“Of course I am,” I said.
I heard him growl from deep in his chest and jumped.
“I'm sixteen, dad,” I said.
“I know that,” he said. “Do you have a boyfriend?”
“Not at the moment. I was talking to this one guy at school, but that didn't work out.”
“Why not?” he asked.
“He was pressuring me about stuff,” I said with a shrug. “I didn't feel like dealing with him.”
He grabbed my arm and turned me toward him.
“If any boy puts his fingers or anything else on you, I will kill him with my bare hands. I will fly out there and kick his scrawny ass,” he whispered for only me to hear.
“You're so funny,” I said with a laugh. “There's no way I'm doing anything like that until I'm eighteen. I know I need to graduate first. You'd kill me if I didn't.”
He cleared his throat.
“Eighteen?” he asked. “No, no, no.”
“What?” I asked.
He shook his head.
“Graduate college first,” he said. “You may do that once you are twenty-two.”
I pulled my arm away from him and laughed.
“What's so funny?” he asked in a serious tone.
“You'll have to excuse me,” I said. “I've spoken more to you today than
I have in two years. I'm not used to anything but the business dad. This dad is not something I'm used to.”
“Oh yeah,” he said. “Well, you better get used to him. He's going to be right there until you're twenty-two.”
We both laughed at that comment.
“You have no idea how much I've missed having you around the house. I know we didn't spend a lot of time together, but I always knew you were there. I used to look out my office window and watch you swim with Rosie. It was adorable. I worked so hard so you would never have to live a poor childhood like I did. In doing that, I missed what was important. That was spending time with you. I'm so sorry I was never there for you. I was too busy working and fighting with your mom. By the time I realized it, she wouldn't let me see you.”
“I'm here now,” I said.
“You are,” he said. “You've just made me aware that I need to pay very close attention to what you're doing.”
“I'm not doing anything,” I said, as I pulled him through the store.
The next week went by pretty quickly. It was more of the same working with Rosie, swimming, and picking at Kyle. My dad was a little more vocal at dinner each night. He actually got Laura to shut up long enough for all four of us to talk. I think Kyle was just as surprised as I was. We were sitting at dinner that Saturday and my dad really blew my mind.
“We are all going out to dinner tomorrow night,” he said.
“What?” Laura asked. “Is it some kind of business thing?”
“No,” he said. “It's a family thing. Are you free Kyle?”
“Sure,” Kyle answered nervously.
I kicked him under the table and he laughed.
“Where are we going?” Laura asked.
“Kyle and Carrie can decide. It doesn't matter to me,” dad answered.
“I'm not dressing up,” Kyle said. “I want to go someplace we can wear shorts.”
I knew his ass was testing my father's limits and was actually proud of him.
“Me too,” I said.
It was going to be torture for Laura. My dad didn't mind jeans occasionally, at least he didn't use to two years ago.