Debase

by Rachel Van Dyken

  “I practiced.”

  “It shows.” Tex barked out a laugh. “Let’s go, Little Petrov. Class is dismissed early, and I have a hankering for a burger.”

  “Oh shit, I could use some fries,” Chase grumbled.

  I wasn’t sure how to respond.

  The rest of the class seemed frozen.

  So, I grabbed my things and slowly made the achingly painful walk to the front of the room. Andrei wrapped an arm around me then pulled me against his chest and kissed the fear and shame right out of my body, replacing it with something else, something that felt a lot like acceptance and hope all wrapped up in love.

  Something that was… warm.

  “Let’s go, dorogaya.”

  I’d arrived at Eagle Elite with a guard.

  And left.

  With an army.

  CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT

  Andrei

  WE’D DRIVEN SEPARATELY.

  I sent Ax with the rest of the guys.

  Mentally thanked them for standing by my side when I forwarded them the text Ax had sent me as he scrolled through the Eagle Elite social media accounts.

  The anger I felt in seeing those words directed at her.

  At mine.

  Was enough to set me off for the next decade.

  It was enough for me to pack enough ammo to take out the entire city block.

  It was enough for me, Andrei Petrov, to humbly ask for help.

  They didn’t ask questions.

  They didn’t mock me.

  They said “done” and minutes later, we walked in together, as a team, as a family.

  I would take it to my grave, the way it felt to have the Italians ready to shoot on sight for offending what was mine.

  I would never admit that I didn’t say thank you because I wasn’t sure I could get through it without trembling, without tapping my foot, without looking weak.

  So, I nodded my head at them.

  Got a few middle fingers back.

  And got into the car.

  Alice was quiet as she sat next to me, her face ashen, her thigh-high boots kissing her skin with their smooth leather making me want to dip my hand between her legs and shove her skirt up past her hips.

  Whore.

  Petrov Prostitute.

  Those bastards should count themselves lucky that I didn’t want her to see all the blood I would spill and hold it against me.

  Because I had driven to that school with the purpose of killing.

  And the only person that was able to stop me, to talk me from the ledge, was Phoenix, followed by a gruesome looking Chase who just shrugged and said, “It was messy, didn’t have time to clean up.”

  The old me would have mocked him, said something to insult him and make him feel less than.

  But I couldn’t see past the rage.

  Couldn’t feel anything but the hard rhythm of my heart as it thudded angrily against my chest with the need for retribution, to hurt them the way they hurt her.

  Some of the anger was misplaced, and maybe misdirected at myself, because I’d called her a number, I’d called her a whore. I had done those things, justified them because I was trying to protect her.

  I swerved my black Maybach to the side of the road, my hands still gripping the steering wheel as I stared ahead.

  Alice didn’t move.

  I clenched my jaw so hard that pain shot down my neck. “Are you okay?”

  Slowly she turned to me and laid a hand on my shoulder. “Are you?”

  I counted her soft breaths.

  One, two, three, all unhurried, all patiently waiting for me to fill the silence with something other than her breathing, something other than the painful beat of my heart.

  I felt too much with her.

  And all at once.

  Her fingertips, I focused on her fingertips, in the way they dug softly into my shoulder, watching, waiting, comforting.

  I got out a hoarse “no.” And finally released my grip on the steering wheel and turned to her.

  Pink cheeks, full lips, wide green eyes, measured breaths, and worried posture.

  She was everything I wasn’t supposed to want.

  “You saved me again.” Her hand was still on my shoulder.

  “No.” I shook my head. “I think you have that backward, dorogaya. It’s you who has saved me.”

  Her eyes widened.

  And I acted.

  I unbuckled my seatbelt, leaned over the center console, and jerked her against me, swallowing any protest she might have on her lips, tasting her with my whole body with every sense on fire.

  It was passion.

  It was painful.

  It was us.

  A chaotic mixture of all of my nerve endings firing too fast, too intense, but I didn’t want to stop it anymore.

  Maybe because I couldn’t.

  I was losing the war.

  No, I wasn’t losing.

  I was forfeiting.

  And winning all at once.

  She moaned against my mouth as my hands roamed down her shoulders, pulling open her white oxford shirt. I kept one hand on her trembling body while I moved the other down to her skirt.

  Her hips bucked as I slid my hand up her naked thigh. “I’m keeping you.”

  She softened against me, kissed me again, dragged her lips across mine over and over again. “Good.”

  She spread her legs for me.

  And I nearly died.

  So trusting to a man who promised he’d murder her if she asked.

  To a man who didn’t deserve to be touching anything so pure.

  To the devil himself.

  “Alice…” Her name felt like worship. Maybe for someone like me, it was.

  I didn’t know how to navigate what I was about to ask her, what I was about to take from her.

  Or what I would give her.

  All I knew was that if I couldn’t hold her anymore, if the warmth, the life, left her body.

  I would die.

  I’d never loved anyone before.

  And I’d never loved myself.

  Maybe it was love.

  Maybe it was obsession.

  Lust.

  Maybe a little bit of all three.

  I didn’t care.

  “Alice.” I said her name again because it felt like being baptized.

  New.

  Pure.

  I moved my hand from her thigh and pulled away.

  And then I reached into my pocket and pulled out the knife Luca had given me when I agreed to go under cover with the FBI for him, when I agreed to turn against my own blood, when, according to him, I became my own man.

  “I bled against this blade,” I whispered. “So did Luca. A blood oath isn’t just a promise. It’s a completely unbreakable bond.”

  Alice licked her swollen lips and nodded in understanding.

  “So, when I tell you that I’m binding myself to you,” I continued. “I want you to know that the only thing that will keep me from you is death.”

  Tears filled her eyes, and one spilled down her cheek. I caught it with my finger and lifted it to my mouth, tasting the salt of her tears, pledging a silent oath to make sure that she never spilled them because of me or her family again.

  With shaking hands I let the facade slip.

  I let go of the control I so desperately felt the need to have over everything.

  And I took off both gloves and dropped them onto the console.

  She sucked in a sharp breath like she’d just seen monster and man fuse or maybe she just saw vulnerability I refused to let anyone else see.

  This was it.

  This moment.

  On the side of the road.

  With Alice De Lange.

  My gaze didn’t waver from hers. “The Italians cut across the hand.”

  I peeled my shirt over my head. “The Russians…cut across the heart.”

  I sliced across my chest, felt my heart beat against the metal blade as I carved a bloody A into my own
skin.

  Her eyes widened as I reached for her right hand, slicing across the palm and pressing it to my chest.

  I kept it there.

  More tears filled her eyes as she stared at me in wonder.

  “I, Andrei Petrov, pledge my life, my heart, my soul to you.”

  I didn’t realize that I was shaking until she wrapped her free arm around me and held me tight.

  Our blood flowing, mixing, making love, as it dripped down my body.

  CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE

  Phoenix

  “NICE SWING.” I pulled off my aviators and watched as Luca stiffened and then turned toward me and cursed. “Not happy to see me?”

  He grabbed his club, his fingers tight. “Was thinking about throwing this around four minutes ago but figured Bee would be mad if you came home with two black eyes.”

  I grinned. “She’s seen worse.”

  “Haven’t we all.” He sighed and slowly walked over to me, he was wearing black trousers and a black long-sleeve shirt that looked a bit out of place on a golf course. Then again, the gun shoved in the back of the pants didn’t exactly help things.

  “Your gun’s showing.” I pointed.

  “I don’t play well with others.”

  “And that extends to your golf retirement as well?”

  His eyes narrowed. “I don’t believe we had a meeting today.”

  “We didn’t.”

  “And yet here we are.”

  “Here we are.” I jumped into the golf cart. “I’ll drive.”

  He sighed and got in on the other side while I drove us to the next hole. “I need you to be there when we tell Andrei.”

  “We?”

  “Yes, we.”

  “Did you have a plan outside of just shocking the hell out of him?”

  “No, I thought ripping the band-aid as aggressively as possible would be the best way to get myself shot so I decided to bring you in to soften him up.”

  “Andrei doesn’t understand the word soften.”

  “And you do?”

  He barked out a laugh. “You’ve made your point.”

  I slowed down to the next hole and stared ahead as the sun started to set. “He’s not going to take the news well.”

  “You could always bring in Nikolai and Maya.”

  “Thought about that, but then we’d be asking Nikolai to fess up and let her know he’s been working for Andrei ever since Alexander’s death.”

  “Your point?”

  “I think he’d like to stay married. You know, regular sex and all…”

  Luca shrugged. “He will need family.”

  “He has us,” I found myself saying even though half the time I wanted to shove him in front of the nearest semi. Something shifted today, though, something I didn’t expect.

  He showed a bit of humanity.

  Along with self-control I wasn’t sure I would have if someone had said something like that about Bee.

  And by the looks of him, he still hadn’t slept with her.

  He was too uptight.

  “You done thinking in my golf cart?” Luca whispered, sarcasm dripping off every word.

  I rolled my eyes. “I didn’t tell any of the guys.”

  “It was your call to make.”

  “Yeah, but what the fuck am I going to do when the Sinacore Family shows up for family dinner? You know they’ll move the entire family here. They’ll have no choice, not with Andrei and the others here, and you know what they’ll want.”

  Luca sighed long and hard. “They’ll want to take the place of the De Langes.”

  “They’ll have a right to.”

  “We would once again be strong, five families strong,” Luca said more to himself than to me.

  “And the De Langes will officially be exorcised.” Andrei would fight us on that, but of course he would, because unless he made her his in all the ways that matter, legal and physical, she had no protection.

  And if the Sinacore Family ever found out she was from the De Lange bloodline.

  They’d kill him before letting him sully their blood.

  Bad enough that he was half Russian.

  Even worse, to fall in love with a De Lange.

  “Does he love her?” Luca asked the question I’d been pondering for the last week.

  “Andrei doesn’t know how to love. I know that, you know that, the very fact that he’s fallen this hard this fast tells me he could, but it may be too late for him.” I hated admitting it. “If he hasn’t given in now… then I’m left to assume he’s intrigued, and he likes her that’s as far as it will go.”

  “And if you’re wrong?” Luca asked.

  “Then I’m completely fucked because even I don’t want to get on Andrei’s bad side. Like I said, I made a judgement call because it’s what’s best for him, and what’s best for the families.”

  Luca patted my shoulder. “You better hope you’re right.”

  “What would you have done?” I looked up at him.

  He winked. “I chose well.”

  “What the hell does that mean?”

  Luca got out of the cart and grabbed a driver from his bag. “Wanna play?”

  “Luca.”

  “What?”

  I crossed my arms.

  “Phoenix grab a damn driver and stop staring at me like I’m the devil. We both know he rarely visits me anymore now that he’s off torturing Andrei. Temptation must be hell for that boy.” He pointed his club at me. “The only other person I’ve ever seen that needed to get laid more than his next meal was you and at least you weren’t a virgin.”

  I rolled my eyes.

  “And for the record.” He grinned. “I would have done the same thing.”

  It didn’t make me feel any better.

  Then again, I rarely felt good about decisions that could ruin lives or end up killing people.

  “Grab a damn club.”

  I flipped him off and grabbed a club. And tried to forget about what was coming in the next week.

  And the many lives that would be taken.

  All because a Sinacore woman fell in love with the devil himself, Alexander Petrov.

  CHAPTER FORTY

  Alice

  IT HAD BEEN exactly two hours since we’d made it back to the apartments. Since Andrei had walked through the club bloody and shirtless for everyone to see. An A across his chest.

  Me… across his heart.

  Written in his skin.

  He’d wrapped my hand in his shirt and my first instinct was to take it off, to let myself bleed too, to feel the raw intensity of blood pulsing out of my body at the same time his was.

  Knowing that what he had done could not be undone.

  There was something holy about the entire conversation, even his expression had changed. Like he chose to remove his mask.

  He’d told me to change into another dress and to do my hair and makeup and then he’d just left.

  He didn’t tell me when he’d be back.

  Or if he was coming back.

  Nothing.

  I slipped on a white Versace that hugged every curve, the neckline had a slight sweetheart dip while the straps wrapped around my neck then hung loosely down the back as another set of straps kept the dress in place. My shoes were a nude heel from a brand I didn’t recognize but knew was Italian.

  And I was once again wearing a fur coat, wondering how many fake animals were sacrificed in order to fill my closet.

  I had just sat down on the barstool, wondering yet again if I should text him when the door swung open.

  I couldn’t keep my expression calm as he swaggered his way toward me, dark skinny jeans, boots, and a black T-shirt with a few holes was tight against his body, his camel colored leather jacket completed the effect.

  His nose ring almost glistened in the light, his hair was swept to the side, and I could see every inch of his chest and neck tattoos as they danced along his skin.

  His lips looked so soft.

  So kis
sable.

  His mouth absolutely delicious.

  Mine.

  This man had pledged himself to me.

  I started shaking with the reality of it.

  I slid off the barstool and walked toward him.

  Andrei held out his hands when I reached him and then he tugged me against him and kissed me softly, hungrily. “You ready to go?”

  “Where are we going?” I wanted to stay right there in his arms.

  “We’ll put in our time at the club, be seen, and then we’ll go have dinner…”

  I grinned. “Dinner, hmm?”

  “Dinner.” He kissed me again, his hands dipping tenderly into my hair as he licked my lower lip.

  I gasped as he tugged it and pulled away. “Is this… a date?”

  His hands slid down my ass as he held me prisoner against his rock-hard body. His head tilted as a small smile formed across his mouth. “Did you want it to be?”

  I felt my cheeks heat. “I’ve never been on a real date.”

  His expression hardened, and then he whispered. “Good. That means I’m your first. I want to be your first everything.”

  My knees trembled. “That’s a big undertaking.”

  “Good thing I’m a big guy,” he fired back with a wider grin. “I like your blush.”

  I looked away.

  He gripped my chin. “Don’t, Alice. Don’t look away when I give you a compliment. Your blush is everything. It reminds me that this…” He pressed a hand to my chest. “…is beating, is pumping blood throughout your body. Your blush is a gift, it’s a reminder you’re alive. I need that, possibly more than you could ever imagine.”

  I pressed my hand against his as my heart raced. “Do your friends know that you’re romantic?”

  “I’m not romantic.” He squeezed my hand. “I was merely being honest.”

  Well then!

  “Okay.”

  He turned and draped an arm around my shoulders. “Rumor has it, your brother’s going to come again tonight.”

  I stiffened. “Why are we going out there, then?”

  “To put on a fucking show.” He said through clenched teeth. “And then, I’m going to make sure he never sees daylight again. Tonight, we celebrate.”

  “Celebrate?”

  “I’m bringing him down. Should I give you his head as a gift? His eyes?”

  I gulped. “No. His life is enough.”