Love Realized

by Melanie Codina

  Logan gave her a sheepish smile and moved farther into the living room. All her years as his wife told her that he was having a lot of trouble with being there. All those years also taught her how she needed to handle the situation. While she was sure that most women would probably demand an apology, just the look and demeanor of the man she loved for so many years told her how sorry he felt. She didn’t need the words—she had what she needed.

  Standing up, even though Jake tried to stop her, she made her way over to Logan and stood right in front of him. Looking up at him, she tried to make eye contact, but he avoided it. Just wanting to get this over with, she said, “I don’t blame you for what happened.”

  That immediately had his attention, and his eyes snapped up to meet hers. The look of outrage on his face was kind of funny, and she attempted to stifle her laugh, but was only partially successful. Her tight-lipped smile probably fueled his irritation, which was just a bonus for her, but she managed to restrain the rest of the laugh from coming out. Logan took in a deep breath and attempted to say something, but then let all the air out in one big huff. Stuttering a few times as he tried to speak only made her want to giggle more because it was the best way to diffuse a situation.

  When Logan finally found the ability to speak, it came out in a low exasperated tone, “I blame myself.” All the outrage she saw a few moments earlier left his body as his shoulders slumped in defeat. “I'm so sorry, Gillian … for everything.”

  She smiled at him. “I know you are, so let’s move on from all of it.” Logan just looked at her in astonishment, which made her uncomfortable, so sarcasm rose to the surface and she said, “But don’t get me wrong, I am so going to bring up the fact that I have a bullet hole in my shoulder. It will be a cooler scar than any of you guys have.”

  Logan’s eyebrows scrunched together. “That’s not cool, Gillian. I really don’t think we should joke about this.”

  Refusing to be persuaded she said, “You’re just saying that because you know it’s true, and you don’t get to take that away from me. I will win that competition every time. Well, until someone else gets shot, which better not happen!”

  He just shook his head at her and asked, “And we just move on from this … just like that?”

  She nodded and said, “Just like that. I refuse to focus on shitty events in my life.”

  He gave her that one-sided grin that she always loved and said, “Glass half full, right?”

  She snorted a laugh, “Exactly! It’s about time you see things my ways—only took you eighteen years.”

  “Thanks Gilly.” Then he carefully pulled her into a hug. It was nice, but it wasn’t the same as it used to be, which only reminded her of what she now had. Pulling back, she smiled at Logan, then turned to look at Jake who had been watching the exchange. She removed herself from Logan’s embrace and walked into Jake’s. It was easy to melt right into him as she wound her right arm around his back and nestled her nose into the crook of his neck. Feeling him kiss the top of her head, she sighed and asked, “Not that I'm complaining or anything, but didn’t I hear something about turkey and all the fixings? I assumed you all meant that someone made it and that you all didn’t expect me to prepare it. Hello, bullet wound over here. I'm pretty sure I have a free pass for a little while.”

  Both men laughed out loud, and she looked up at Jake as he said, “You can use that pass for anything you want, and for as long as you want, beautiful.” Leaning down, Jake pressed a kiss to her lips.

  She heard Logan huff an exasperated breath as he said, “That is really going to take some getting used to.” Making his way out of the room he said, “I assume my sons are around here somewhere?” And with that, he left the room.

  Gillian smiled up at Jake again, perfectly content with how things just played out. She was fully aware that many would have handled it differently, but it was how she wanted things to be. She was about to ask when everyone else was coming over when the doorbell rang. Madison sprinted into the room saying, “I got it!” Still holding onto Jake, Gillian waited for the rest of her family to come in when Madison said, “Mom, there’s someone at the door for you.”

  CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT

  Gillian looked up at Jake and shrugged her one shoulder. She had no idea who could be there, but left the comfort of Jake’s embrace to see. As she came up beside her daughter, she smiled at her and took a moment to notice how they were close to the same height. Trying not to get distracted by her thoughts of how old her kids were getting, she turned her attention to whoever the visitor was. It took her moment to realize who was standing there, but when she did, she sucked in a sharp breath at the sight of Jody Spencer standing on her doorstep.

  She quickly shifted so that she was positioned in front of her daughter and shoved her behind her with her one good arm. Once she felt her daughter was protected from whatever immediate danger there was, she lowered her voice and demanded, “What the hell are you doing here?”

  The woman hadn’t spoken and looked a little worried. Flashing back to the last time this woman was this close to her, Gillian couldn’t help but notice how different things were. She almost felt bad for the woman last time, but this time the woman knew where she was and willingly came. If it hadn’t been for the fact that Gillian had a bullet hole in her shoulder from this woman’s husband, she might admire the woman. She certainly had balls to show up here, but she didn’t deserve Gillian’s respect, so she wasn’t going to get it.

  ~*~*~*~*~~*~*~*~*~

  Jake heard Gillian’s sharp intake of air, and he was immediately up and moving. He didn’t know if she was in pain or if something else was wrong, but then he heard her say, “What the hell are you doing here?” This wasn’t good, he thought as he took up the position next to her. When his eyes landed on the petite blonde standing outside the door, he knew immediately who it was. He had no idea what this woman’s intentions were, but she needed to get the hell away from Gillian.

  Before she could answer Gillian’s question, Jake stepped in front of Gillian and barked at the woman, “I think you better get out of here … now, or I’ll call the cops.” The woman flinched as if she’d been slapped. Jake didn’t mind that one little bit, though, ‘cause he wanted her gone. The possible stress she could put Gillian under wouldn’t be good for her or the pregnancy.

  The woman had yet to move or say anything, so Jake pulled out his phone to dial when she spoke, “I just wanted to apologize … I know what Adam did, and I'm sorry.”

  Jake wanted to pick the woman up and physically remove her from Gillian’s property. He didn’t care if she was sorry; she threatened to cause more damage now with just her presence. He began to dial when he heard Gillian speak from behind him, “Do you really think I want your apology? Do you really think it means anything to me?” Coming out from behind him, she tried to get in between him and her, but Jake wasn’t about to allow that. He needed to keep control of this situation before it became a real problem and her health was affected. He needed to keep her blood pressure down.

  Fortunately, Gillian didn’t push the issue and let Jake hold her at his left side, leaving her right arm wrapped around him, and allowing full exposure of her restrained injured shoulder. When the woman still hadn’t responded, Gillian continued, “You, and any words you feel you need to say, mean shit to me! Your husband tried to kill me because of your actions! I can only believe that you came here in an attempt to make yourself feel better for what happened.” Gillian paused, then Jake saw her composed face turn to one of disgust with her next words. “You mean nothing to me, and I will not give you my forgiveness for what you’ve done to my family and me. I hope you live with those regrets for a very long time. Now get the hell off of my property.”

  Gillian’s voice was cool, calm, and calculating as she delivered those words. The thought that this woman, whose husband shot Gillian, sought some form of absolution with an apology was mind boggling to him. Jake was proud of Gillian, because he thought for a moment
that she would accept the apology and let the woman off the hook. He stuffed his phone in his pocket and reached for the door to close it because it really didn’t matter what the woman had to say.

  Suddenly, Logan’s voice boomed from behind them. “What the fuck is going on? Get the hell away from my family!”

  Jake prepared his body for Logan trying to move him out of the way when he heard Madison yell, “Daddy, No!” Jake turned to see that Madison had leapt in front of her father and wrapped herself around him, effectively stopping him from moving. It was quite similar to a move he remembered seeing Gillian do once before. Madison held on tightly to him as he looked down at her, a little shell shocked, and she said, “She isn’t worth it, Daddy. She was just leaving, and we don’t want Mom to get upset … please.”

  The pleading tone in her voice must have been the man’s undoing as he wrapped his arms around his only daughter. “You’re right, sweetie. I'm sorry.” Then Jake got to see the emergence of his old friend when he looked to Jody outside the door and said, “I'm having a restraining order placed to protect every member of my family. If you or any part of your family comes within fifty yards, I will press charges. I’ll make sure to tell the District Attorney handling your husband’s case that you showed up here today.” Then Logan turned to Jake and said, “Could you please shut the door now, Jake.”

  Smiling at his old friend, Jake did just that. Then he turned and gently pulled Gillian against him, asking, “How are you feeling? Do you think your blood pressure is okay? Maybe you should sit down and put your feet up.” It all came out quickly and far more high pitched than he thought it should have.

  A huge smile spread across her face as she placed her hand on his cheek. “Why Jake, I do believe you look like you’re about to panic … maybe you’re the one who needs to take a seat.”

  Her good demeanor calmed him instantly. His shoulders relaxed, and he lifted his hand to her hair to pull her into a kiss. He held her there, trying to absorb her into him, calming him completely. When he pulled back, she smiled again and said, “I feel fine, baby. Don’t worry.”

  Pressing his forehead against hers, since he didn’t want to get too far from her, he whispered, “I love you, beautiful.”

  “I love you, too, Jake.” The two of them were enjoying their moment when the front door opened, interrupting it, and Allie came strolling in. She took one look at them and said, “Ugh! Seriously, you two. Jake, can’t you leave her alone for one minute? And Gillian, shouldn’t you at least be pretending that you’re injured? You know … whine and say stuff like, ‘Ouch, my bullet hole hurts.’” She and Jake just laughed at Allie as she kept walking through the room with an arm full of food, followed by Jason, Sean, Morgan, and their kids. All adults had an arm full of something.

  Gillian called out to her, “I would totally help you with all of that, but I have this bullet hole in my shoulder.” This made Jake laugh even more.

  When Gillian turned and looked to Logan and Madison, she smiled at her daughter and said, “I wonder where you learned that move from?”

  Madison gave her a smartass grin and said, “From this really cool mom I’ve got. She is so cool, she even has a bullet hole in her shoulder to prove it.”

  Logan jumped in and said, “Could everyone please just stop saying bullet hole, it’s kind of morbid.”

  Jake laughed when all the women in earshot—Gillian, Allie, Madison, and Morgan—all yelled at the same time, “Bullet hole.” He heard Logan groan as he dropped himself on the couch.

  Following Gillian into the kitchen, Jake escorted her to a seat at the table so that she wouldn’t attempt to help. He watched the banter between her and Allie as she called out, “Gillian, could you get some dishes out for kids to set the table?”

  Gillian responded, “Sorry, can’t help you with that. Bullet hole in my shoulder, remember?”

  Logan yelled from the other room, “Oh, come on, I'm begging you, please stop saying that.”

  This of course just egged Allie on, as she proceeded to pretend she was put out by Gillian not helping get things ready. “Hi, I'm Gillian, I’m lazy and can’t do anything because I have a bullet hole in my shoulder. Blah, blah, blah.”

  Once again laughing, Jake just absorbed it all. Looking into the family room, he could see Jonathan playing video games with Dylan and Ryan, while Jason gave his input as to what they should be doing differently. Sean and Morgan’s two and four year olds were playing on the floor, while he sat with their infant in his arms, watching. Madison had made her way into the kitchen to help Allie and Morgan, and Logan took up a seat at the table across from where Gillian was sitting.

  Taking it all in, Jake couldn’t help but smile as he leaned into Gillian and placed his hand on her good shoulder. She reached up and gave his hand a squeeze as she watched everything that was going on around them. It was traditionally a time to give thanks, and Jake didn’t think he could ever be thankful enough.

  He was thankful that Gillian was okay. He was thankful that, for now, the pregnancy was okay. He was thankful that it appeared he and Logan could possibly move forward as friends. He was thankful that they could all be together. But he was most thankful for the fact that he was able to make Gillian realize that for him, it had always been her.

  EPILOGUE

  Gillian rolled over and groaned as she felt the stiffness in her neck from lying in the same position for too long. Reaching up to rub the stiffness out, her hand was immediately replaced by a warm, strong one, and she felt herself begin to melt into his touch. Jake knew exactly how to rub out her stiff muscles, which was good, because she couldn’t seem to escape the stiffness. Even though her shoulder healed up as it was supposed to, it still got very stiff and achy at times. Knowing that today was going to be a long day anyway, since it was Jonathan’s graduation day, his skilled working of her muscles was a good thing.

  She groaned again, but this time it was because of the sheer ecstasy that was Jake Michaels’s fingers. Feeling his body press up against her from behind, she melted a little more and pressed her bottom back into him. His hardness was always a welcome good morning for her, so without hesitation she reached back to slide her hand between them and show him her appreciation. Jake halted her hand’s progression with his, as he groaned and moved her hand away. “Don’t worry, beautiful, I'm not denying you anything. I just have to get you in a better position.” He finished that off by kissing her shoulder.

  She felt him shift away from her a little, and then he was back, pressing up against her entire body with his. Confused, she attempted to look back at him, but his arm stretched forward and rested on the space of her pillow in front of her. When he moved his hand, there was a little blue box, complete with white ribbon, sitting there in its place. Her hand flew to her mouth as she gasped at the sight of what could only be a ring. There had been times over the past six months where she was actually surprised that Jake hadn’t asked her to marry him. It wasn’t like she could ask him why, but she wondered. Allie told her that it was probably because she was a giant pain in the ass, and he was waiting to see if he really wanted to. This, of course, was Allie’s way of deflecting Gillian’s concerns, and she was grateful for it.

  Jake made a nervous sounding laugh behind her, making her realize that she hadn’t said or done anything yet. Cautiously reaching out, she tentatively touched the silky white bow. She rolled it between her fingers and verified it was really there. Still worried about it disappearing, she picked it up and gave the box a little shake. Yes, it felt real. Another nervous laugh came from Jake as he said, “I can’t tell if you’re afraid of it, or if you just don’t know what it is. You do know that there is something inside the box, right?”

  It was her turn to giggle nervously as she attempted to untie the bow. She was having trouble doing it in the position she was in, so she maneuvered her body so she was lying on her back and Jake was on his side, looking down at her. She now had the box in both hands as she held it out in front of her, and s
tared at it some more. This was it, she thought. Jake was going to ask her to marry him. Slipping the bow off, she stared at the box for another few seconds before she lifted the lid. Blinking a few times to make sure she was seeing correctly, Gillian couldn’t help but be disappointed at what she found inside the box.

  Looking over at Jake, who was smiling like a fool, then back to the box that didn’t contain a ring, Gillian felt the tears well up in her eyes. One rolled, unchecked, down the side of her face as she pulled out the folded piece of paper from where she thought a ring would be. She couldn’t tell what the paper was, or said, since it was folded up tightly. Looking over at Jake again, she couldn’t help but get annoyed at the fact that he looked to be enjoying her obvious disappointment. He huffed a laugh as he removed the empty box from her hand and said, “Open it, beautiful.”