Impulse sa-5

by Moira Rogers

  Wesley Dade shrugged and dealt another hand as Julio led Alec into the lobby area outside the offices. Alec shoved his hands in his pockets and sighed. “I know she’s okay. I know she’s got her bodyguard and Franklin’s with her, and your sister can damn well take care of herself… but I still hate this.”

  It almost made Julio feel bad for being irritated. “She has to miss you. Don’t forget that part.”

  Alec—unshakable Alec, who faced down the Conclave on a daily basis—flinched. “Just makes me feel worse. She’s been working herself hard to get these clinics going.”

  “What did you expect? She’s not going to have tea and throw dinner parties. It’s not who she is.”

  That earned him a frown. “She could take a weekend off and read a book.”

  “Carmen?” Julio snorted. “You married her. You should know better.”

  “So why are you acting like you want to break my face?”

  Busted. “Carmen runs herself like this when she’s upset. Did you know that?”

  The older man leaned back against the wall and closed his eyes. “Of course she’s upset. We both are. We’re gritting our teeth and putting up with hell because it’s not going to get better if we cut and run. God knows I would have, by now, if she’d let me.”

  He was just like everyone else—doing the best he could. “Sorry. It’s hard to see, that’s all. I know you’d make it better for her if you could.”

  “If she’d let me,” Alec corrected with a grumble. “Your sister’s a stubborn, bossy woman.”

  “Yeah, she is.” Julio glanced at the open doorway where the others were still engrossed in their card game and lowered his voice. “Have you heard anything about a handful of wolf mercs turning up dead? Patrick McNamara showed up the other night, busted to hell and back.”

  “Aw, shit. No, haven’t heard anything…but I bet he knows how to make a body or two disappear.”

  “He says his vendetta’s over, but I don’t know.” Julio met Alec’s gaze. “I think some things get to be a habit.”

  “Yes, they do.” Alec rubbed a hand over his beard, his eyes unfocused. “Did Patrick shove off again, or is he sticking around this time?”

  “He made a quick trip to Atlanta, but he’s back now. Staying at the apartment over Mahalia’s.

  Want me to talk to him?”

  “Maybe your brother. I wouldn’t usually ask him to snoop, but a telepath could give us a heads-up if Patrick’s about to go over the edge.”

  Alec deserved the warning. “If Anna finds out…” Julio made a face.

  He got a blank look. “If Anna finds out what?”

  Shit, he really was out of touch. “That we’re wondering what to do if loverboy goes all Apocalypse Now on us.”

  Alec’s mouth fell open, and he gaped at Julio as if he’d lost his mind. “Are you telling me Anna Lenoir has gone soft over a human?”

  “Not totally mushy, but soft enough to rip our heads off if she thinks he’s in danger.”

  “Well that’s some goddamned end-of-days shit.” Alec shook his head with a muffled laugh.

  “Anna’s still living with Sera, isn’t she? Maybe she can provide a soothing influence, keep Anna from blowing her top.”

  “Maybe.” Julio hesitated. “He’s a friend, Alec. It’ll be okay.”

  “I trust you.” And they weren’t just words. The way Alec slumped back against the wall, his very weariness a weakness, proved it. “Listen, I know it’s hard now, with us in New York and you knowing your sister’s having a shit time…but this won’t be forever. We’re digging our heels in because we’re making some progress, and it’s worth some shit in the short term. So hold this town together, huh? And hold yourself together too.”

  He wasn’t the one in danger of falling apart. “Take care of her, Alec.”

  “Never a question, man. Not even a little.”

  “Then leave the rest of it to us.” They hadn’t been doing a bad job, even if they were a bunch of misfits. Maybe because they were.

  “Fair enough.” Alec straightened. “How’s Sera doing without her dad around? He’ll want an update when I meet them tonight.”

  “Fine.” Beyond that, Julio held his tongue. He’d promised not to raise an alarm about the strange phone calls and hang-ups, and there was no quicker way to do that than to have Alec tell Franklin.

  Alec watched him for a moment, an oddly speculative look in his eyes. “Keep an eye on her for him, would you? She’ll ask for help if her problems are supernatural, but she’s incapacitated by pride on the subject of money. He’s worried she’ll go without something she needs instead of getting some damn help.”

  “Anna lives with her,” he reminded him. “She’d help out if she could, and say something if she couldn’t.”

  “Fair enough.” But Alec didn’t look away. “You still seeing Callum?”

  “Got another appointment in a couple of days.”

  “And you’re doing okay?”

  “Making it.” Talking to Callum barely helped, and talking to Alec would be useless. “Carmen’s waiting for you, right?”

  Alec sighed. “She is. Take care of yourself, or she’ll come back here and make you.”

  “I know. She always has.”

  The door behind them shoved open, and Wesley appeared. “You taking off, Alec?”

  “Yeah.” Alec held out his hand to Julio. “Maybe you should too, Wesley, before McNeely flattens you.”

  He grinned. “Maybe it was supposed to happen this way. Maybe this is how it happens.”

  “Or the poor guy was about to make his move and you just set him back a couple months,” Julio groused.

  “We can hear you!” Giselle yelled from inside the office.

  “Fucking shapeshifters.” Alec clasped Julio’s hand, then slapped Wesley on the back. “See you guys in a few weeks. Carmen wants a visit.”

  “Travel safe,” Julio advised, “and give her a hug for me.”

  “Will do.”

  When he was gone, Wesley tilted his head. “He’s right. You should keep an eye on Sera.

  She’s…” For the first time in Julio’s experience, Wesley seemed uncertain. “I don’t know. I haven’t seen anything, but I’ve got a feeling. That girl’s in for a rough road—maybe. Damned if I know.”

  Too many questions—and too many loose ends from her past. “It’s on my to-do list already.”

  “Hell, man. If spending time with a smoking-hot coyote is going to make you that miserable, deputize me. I’ll take good care of her. She looks like she’d make an excellent lucky charm.”

  Julio gave in to the urge to punch the man on the arm. “You stay away from her, or her daddy’ll finish what those angry pit bosses started. Break all your bones.”

  McNeely’s voice rose from the other room. “Are y’all gonna gossip like teenagers or get in here and play some damn poker?”

  Julio punched Wesley again for good measure. “We’re going to play cards.”

  Sera spread her course catalog on the table at Dixie John’s and nudged Lily’s sweet tea out of the way of the crisp pages. “I’m trying to decide what I should take alongside Food Safety and Sanitation. I still need a humanities class and a science. And I have to take English Comp.”

  Lily leaned closer and peered at the pages. “Is this for summer or fall?”

  “Fall. I think I need my summers off.” Which was mostly true. The break from full-time work and part-time classes would give her time to recharge, but it would also give her time to refill her bank account. College, it turned out, had a way of nickel-and-diming you to near bankruptcy, even part-time community college.

  “I know what you mean.” Lily absently stirred her tea. “Humanities are always good because you can go for a logic class or a movie survey or something.”

  “Movies would be fun.” Sera tugged the cap off her marker and circled one of the courses, amused at how willing she was to take Lily’s advice. A year ago, the idea of having lunch with her fathe
r’s girlfriend would have been unthinkable. In the aftermath of the explosion that had nearly killed Franklin, Sera had come home damaged and angry, ready to hate the too-young woman who had taken her mother’s place.

  A tidy bit of hypocrisy, as Kat had pointed out. After all, Sera had run off to marry a man old enough to be her father.

  But Lily was…Lily. Human, but comfortable in the supernatural world. Smart and funny, and willing to give Sera space. She’d never presumed to act like a mother or a replacement for one.

  She’d just loved Sera’s father with a dedication and intensity that made it impossible to dislike her. For the first time in her life, Sera saw her dad happy.

  It was like having a family again, and it made her feel guilty for ever having such uncharitable thoughts about Lily. Sera sipped her own tea and turned the page. “This would go so much faster if I went full-time.”

  Lily shrugged. “You do what you have to do. Your father would pay your tuition and expenses in a heartbeat, but it’s not necessarily the best thing for you right now. He knows that.”

  “Does he?” Sera asked, uncertain. “Honestly, Lily, sometimes I think he’s going to strain something, trying so hard not to push money at me. I know he cares, and he’s there if I need him…”

  “He’s trying,” Lily amended. “Trust me, honey. If he wasn’t, no amount of argument would keep him from shoving his way into your business with his checkbook at the ready.”

  “I know.” Lily had no doubt been at least partly responsible for her father’s restraint. “I needed to take care of myself, but maybe I took it too far.”

  “If you’re ready to let him help out, just say the word.”

  “I’ll think about it.” Sera drew a sweeping circle around an introductory science class and tried to keep her voice casual. “Do you talk to Julio much?”

  “Carmen’s brother?” She shook her head. “Not often. Why?”

  Doodling on the edge of the catalog became very important. “I saw him the other day, and he seemed…tense. I worry about him. He got tortured, and everyone acts like he should be able to shrug it off.”

  “Not exactly. I mean, he’s seeing a therapist. He’s getting help.”

  Sera pressed her lips together and concentrated on the swirls of black ink spreading over the class description for microbiology. “I still worry.”

  “Hmm.” Lily closed the schedule booklet. “Are you worried because he’s not doing so well, or worried because you’d be thinking about him even if he was fine?”

  She’d never deluded herself into believing her stupid little crush had been subtle, but she wasn’t about to admit to it, either. “I’m worried because I saw him right after it happened. I know how hurt he was. I felt it, Lily.”

  “That was months ago, Sera.”

  Had it been? She could still remember parts of it with stark clarity. Not the rescue—everyone else had been busy rescuing Kat. But Julio had charged away from them, half-mad from the adrenaline high Kat had forced him into with the brutal application of empathy.

  Sera had been the one to soothe him. Her touch, her presence. She’d fumbled at first, tried too hard to do the right thing or say the right thing, and in the end all she’d needed to do was close her eyes and just…be.

  She’d never forget Julio’s fingers rasping over her hair, or the way he’d pulled her close and inhaled her scent. Not sexual, not even sensual. Primal and raw, shapeshifter magic at its most basic. An alpha’s desperate rage and a submissive’s quiet trust.

  “Sera?” Lily waved a hand in front of her face. “Have you tried asking Julio how he’s doing?”

  Sera started, hating the heat that rushed to her cheeks. “No. I mean, I can ask how he’s doing, but he’s not going to answer me. He’s alpha, and I’m…” Young. Damaged. They all thought it, even if most of them didn’t say it. “Julio Mendoza isn’t going to confide in me.”

  “But you want him to.”

  Lily’s stare had grown too interested. Sera resisted the urge to bare her teeth—not polite in public, or in the presence of the woman who would probably be her stepmother before long.

  “I’m worried about him, okay? And he’s your best friend’s brother, so I figured you might know.

  I’m worried about Patrick and Kat too.”

  Lily folded her napkin in her lap. “I don’t know if you realize it, but Julio might be more likely to be honest with you than with Carmen when it comes to how he’s feeling.”

  “Me? Or just anyone but Carmen?” The former made her heart skip, but the latter seemed more likely.

  The blonde shrugged, though the movement looked anything but nonchalant. “That’s another thing you’ll have to ask him.”

  She could ask if Lily knew something, but the very act would prove she cared far too much.

  She liked Lily, trusted her, but there were some things Sera didn’t want getting back to her father.

  So she mirrored the other woman’s shrug and lifted her sweet tea. “I’ll do that the next time I see him.”

  “Excellent.” Lily gestured to the menu. “How’s the cheesesteak?”

  “It’s good. Hell, everything’s good.” Sera lifted a hand and waved over the waitress on duty.

  “Teri, can you tell my friend the specials?”

  She leaned over to flip a page on the menu. “As long as a little spice is okay, it’s a travesty if you come to Dixie John’s and don’t do something Cajun.”

  Lily’s eyes lit up. “Give me the fried shrimp and a bowl of red beans and rice, then.”

  Teri scribbled the order on her pad. “Sera?”

  Sera didn’t even look at the menu before pushing it toward Teri. “The usual. How busy has it been? Do you think John’s going to need me tonight?”

  “He could,” she admitted. “New ad’s running in the visitors’ guide. Lots of tourists finding their way in.”

  Thursdays weren’t usually busy, but Teri was new, one of the lion pride who’d taken time settling in New Orleans before finding a job. “If it gets bad, shout for me. I’m done with classes for the summer.”

  “Yeah?” She grinned as she tucked her pen behind her ear. “I might take you up on that.”

  Teri left with both menus, and Sera glanced at Lily. “You’re not going to lecture me about working too much, are you?”

  “Honey, that’d make me the biggest hypocrite in town. I put in insane hours and still take work home with me.”

  “I know.” Someday, she might even think about her father the surgeon and his girlfriend the assistant district attorney without feeling like a complete loser. “Maybe I’ll talk to Dad when he gets back about letting him pick up some of the slack in the fall. The sooner I finish school, the better off I’ll be, right?”

  Lily smiled gently. “The sooner you finish, the sooner you can do what you really want to do.”

  Somehow, Lily understood. That finishing school and starting a catering business wasn’t the dream, it was the goal. The dream was independence.

  For a submissive shapeshifter, sometimes it never got to be more than a dream.

  Chapter Three

  Julio stared at Callum, the empath who had become his therapist.

  Callum stared back.

  Callum always did that, even when Julio dedicated himself to avoiding eye contact. It was impossible not to feel the appraising weight of the man’s gaze, the prickling sensation that said you were being catalogued. Studied.

  Julio shifted in the plush chair and looked away. “Have you figured me out yet, Dr. Tyler?”

  “Do you think that’s what I’m here to do?” came the infuriatingly calm response. “Figure you out?”

  “Isn’t it?”

  Callum’s mouth twitched. “No. If I had any particular need to figure you out, Mr. Mendoza, I’d unshield and find out what makes you tick. It wouldn’t take long, but it also wouldn’t do you much good. You need to figure yourself out.”

  “What if I don’t want to?” It was the first
honest thing he’d said in a long time, and as soon as it slipped out he wanted to call it back.

  “That’s worth figuring out too.”

  Julio focused his attention on a Rubik’s Cube perched on the edge of Callum’s desk. “Maybe I need a vacation.”

  Callum sat back and folded his hands together, his body language precise and casual.

  “When’s the last time you took a holiday?”

  “I don’t know. When I lived in Charleston, I guess.” He stared at a green square. “I came down to New Orleans and helped Miguel move from the dorms to his apartment.”

  “Mmm.” Even without words, Callum always managed to sound like he’d had a minor revelation. “Well, if you could go on one now, what would you do?”

  That, at least, was easy to answer. “I’d go someplace where no one knows who I am.”

  “Among humans, then.” Callum’s smile held more than a little self-deprecation. “I understand how exhausting it can be to have one’s reputation precede oneself.”

  “It’s…work,” Julio corrected. “There’s always work.”

  “Yes.” Callum leaned forward and braced his elbows on his desk. “Work you didn’t ask for.”

  Work he didn’t really want. “Doesn’t matter, does it? It still has to get done.”

  “Yes,” the empath agreed readily. “But this is the problem with a city full of dominant shapeshifters. You take care of everyone else, but not each other. And no one takes care of you.”

  Julio stifled a laugh. “And here I thought the problem was more complicated than that.”

  “Oh, it always is.” Callum lifted one eyebrow. “But am I wrong, Julio? This city is out of balance, and nature abhors such things.”

  “I thought nature abhorred a vacuum.”

  “Making you all miserable isn’t an appropriate expression of nature’s hatred?”

  “I don’t think nature needs to intervene. We do a damn good job on our own.”

  “Maybe you do.” After a moment of silence, Callum’s smile faded. “You talk to me because it makes everyone else feel better.”

  Julio pasted on a cocky grin. “I talk to you because I know otherwise you’d miss our times together.”