Never Forget Him
Page 12
He turns to me and is just about to snap at me again when his face softens. “Sorry, this isn’t your fault. Fuck, I need to get back. Shit.”
“It’ll be okay. Can we get a train or something?” I grab my phone to start looking at other options.
* * *
“Where are you meeting him?” I ask as the train pulls to a stop.
What was meant to be a three hour drive has turned into an almost six hour journey. Jay is seriously agitated. I don’t think these kind of last minute issues sit right with his strictly planned army life. He’s had to put his friend off and I know he’s here in the city waiting on him. I can see Jay’s trying to keep himself in check for my benefit, and I appreciate it, but I wish he’d chill out a little.
He grabs both of our bags and I try to keep up with him as he finds us a taxi and barks at the driver to head towards Cabot Circus.
“I’m so sorry. This has totally ruined our time together.”
“It’s fine, Jay. There’s not a lot we could’ve done about it. We’re almost there.”
Jay pays the driver, and hand in hand we walk past the shops down Broadmead until he pulls me to a stop by the seating area in the centre of the walkway.
“I need you know how much this all meant to me, Erin,” he says sincerely as he places his hand over my heart.
“I know. Me too,” I say, trying desperately to keep my tears at bay.
“But I need you to promise me something.”
“Anything.”
“If someone better comes along, I want you to go for it. Don’t put your life on hold for me.”
“Don’t be crazy, I won’t—”
“Promise me,” he repeats, a little harsher.
“Okay, I promise,” I say, but I have no intention of following through on it because I know for a fact there won’t be anyone else.
“But if in six months’ time you still want me, then I’ll be here, right here in this very spot, waiting for you.”
I lose my battle and my tears fall. Jay reaches up and catches them with his thumbs.
“I have something for you.” He drops his duffle bag on the floor and pulls something from the pocket. My breath catches when I see a little black box in his hand and my eyes widen in shock. “It’s not that kind,” he says with a sad laugh. “But it’s a promise. A promise that I’ll be here waiting for you no matter what you decide.”
Jay grabs my shaking hand and slides the stunning vintage ring onto my finger. I choke back a sob as I study it. “It’s my birthstone,” I say, looking at the opal sat in the centre.
“BAX!” I hear shouted, but Jay doesn’t turn around or even acknowledge it.
“Here,” he says, popping a piece of paper inside the ring box and handing it over. “I love you, Erin, and I’ll be back for you. I promise.”
“I love you, too,” I stutter out as a guy I vaguely recognise steps up to us.
“I’ve got to go.” He pulls me into a tight hug and we hold each other for a long time before he lets go and gives me the most incredible kiss. “I promise,” he repeats again before stepping back.
It happens all of a sudden and I know it’s how we both need it to, but he grabs his bag, turns, and marches away. Johnny’s hot on his tail and the only thing I hear him say is, “Whoa, mate, it looks like you had fun.”
I stand on that exact spot for the longest time after they’ve left. I feel lost. I don’t want to go home, I don’t want to go anywhere, not without him.
I feel like half of me just left.
I don’t notice the people walking around me or the sun starting to set and night descending. All I can focus on is the empty feeling in my chest that only seems to be getting worse the farther away I know he’s getting.
I lift my hand with the box in and open it before pulling the piece of paper out.
13/10/2012
I promise x
With that piece of paper gripped in my hand, I make my way home, towards an unsteady few months and one very long wait.
Chapter Nine
6 months later…
I understand why Jay said he wouldn’t be in contact, that he wanted me to live my life, and if we were meant to be then we would be. But fuck, these last six months have been the hardest of my life.
The shop is right on the cusp of going under, Mum’s health’s deteriorating by the day, but she still point blank refuses to give it up. I get that she’s chasing her dream, but there has to come a point where it’s just not worth it, and I’m pretty sure we’re there.
I swipe a coat of gloss across my lips and as I put the cap back on, my ring catches my eye. I haven’t taken it off since the second he slid it on my finger six months ago.
I try to keep my butterflies under control, but as the days have been counting down, they’ve been multiplying faster and faster. I’m excited as hell but I’m also nervous. What if it’s not like I remember? What if it was only meant to be those two weeks? All these questions fly around my mind as I step out the front door and look at Peggy sat on the drive.
Two weeks after I got back, the last thing I was expecting was to find Dean stood at my doorstep with Peggy’s keys swinging from his fingers.
“He told me to drop it off here.” Dean said, handing them over. “There’s this, too.”
When I opened the envelope, there was a receipt inside for an intensive driving course, and a note telling me to look after his baby until he got back.
I jump inside and start her up. She purrs just like she did when Jay drove her. I’ve made sure I’ve kept on top of all her maintenance and she’s perfectly clean, ready for his return. I have to admit, I’m going to be sad to see her go. Since setting up my website and getting my jewellery into more stores across the city, I’ve managed to get enough orders to have a little stash of money put away ready to buy myself a car of my own. Mum hated that I was no longer selling exclusively through her shop but I can’t go down with her. I need to think of my future, now more than ever.
I’m a nervous wreck as I sit on one of the benches waiting for him. Town is packed, as there’s some kind of event going on. There were signs on every post on the drive here, but none of them held my attention. There are street entertainers on every corner, and people chatting, laughing, and joking as they go about their day. They have no idea the importance of who I’m waiting for as I sit here.
I wait.
And I wait.
I look around through the hordes of people waiting for his face to appear, but it doesn’t.
I check my phone. I have no idea why, because as he promised the night we met, we never swapped numbers.
Maybe he’s delayed, so I wait a little longer.
I sit there until the sun’s long set and the street’s practically empty, still holding on to a small shred of hope that he’s going to appear, while trying desperately hard not to think he changed his mind—or worse. Not one second of the past six months have I been able to forget that he left me to enter a war zone. No, I can’t think like that. He’s strong, nothing will have happened to him.
He’s coming.
I know he is.
Something deep inside me tells me he’s fine; I have to trust my instinct.
Eventually, I need to move. I’m stiff from sitting on the same bench practically all day, and I’m starving after having eaten through the snacks I brought with me hours ago. I stand up and stretch my back out before rubbing my hand over my ever-growing belly. He’s been kicking the whole time I’ve been sat here waiting for his daddy, but I can only wait for so long. In my last ditch attempt in case he’s really late, I pull a piece of paper from my note book and scribble out a message for him before tucking it into the bench. I have one last look around the dark street before I walk away.
I’ve got to be strong, I tell myself. This isn’t just about me anymore. But the second I shut the car door—his car door—I break down and cry like I’ve never cried in my life.
Epilogue
Present…
I take one last look in the mirror before opening the bathroom door to join Alex in the living room.
“Did he go down okay?” Alex asks.
Denny hasn’t been great at going to bed for the last few weeks and it usually takes me having to lie with him until he drifts off—that’s after his nightly story, of course.
“Yeah, he was okay.”
“E, what’s wrong?” he asks when he looks up at me.
“Nothing, babe. I’m just tired.”
Alex has always been able to tell when something’s wrong; he’s too perceptive. I knew I shouldn’t have gone and dug that scrapbook out, but something about talking about Jay with Denny tonight had me wanting to remember. I’ve never told Alex the whole story about Denny’s dad, just that I had a fling with a soldier, and I don’t intend on telling him the details now. What’s the point? Denny’s going to be five soon, and it’s not like he’s ever coming back.
Most days, I’m okay, and I feel like I dealt with everything that happened after Jay didn’t come back, but others threaten to break me.
I look up to the last photo I have of Mum and me on the mantelpiece. She has her hand on my pregnant belly and is smiling up at me. She died a couple of weeks later. The stress of it sent me into early labour. Denny was in hospital for weeks before he was strong enough to leave. Everything went to shit pretty quickly but Denny saved me. Every day, he saves me, and now we have Alex, and life is good.
“Come and sit down, baby. You need to relax a little, you’re working too hard.”
I fall down next to Alex and give him a kiss when he leans in.
Life’s good. I’ve got a good boyfriend, a great business and an amazing son. My only problem?
I’ll never forget him.
Never Forget Us: Never Forget #2, available now
I thought I’d found my forever.
I believed he’d come back to me and we’d have our happily ever after.
He didn’t.
Instead, he left me with a lifeline and a reason to keep going.
I’ll never forget us, what we had, even if it was only for a short time.
Never Forget Us is the conclusion of Tracy Lorraine’s steamy military duo, Never Forget.
Download your copy now!
Never Forget Us
Prologue
Jay
I was there that day.
Just out of sight, on the corner, watching her.
She was even more beautiful than I remembered. From where I was stood, I could see the excitement in her eyes as she scanned the crowd, looking for me. Her hair, longer than when I first met her, blew around her face in the breeze. She was wearing a grey heavy knit poncho that hid her gorgeous curves, and as desperate as I was to go over there and pull her to me, I knew it wasn’t the right thing to do.
I stayed in the shadows all day, not once taking my eyes from her. It was going to be the last time I saw her.
The sun had long set when I saw her turn her back on me and leave. The stabbing pain in my gut as I watched her walk away is something that will stay with me forever. I made my way over to the bench she’d occupied all day. I plucked the neatly folded up piece of paper I saw her leave and my hands shook as I tried to prepare myself for what she could have written.
After a few seconds, I found the courage to open it. The moment my eyes landed on her handwriting, they filled with tears. I couldn’t remember the last time I cried. It wasn’t when my dad left or when my mum overdosed. It wasn’t when I lost any of my mates on tour, and it definitely wasn’t in the last few months, as I’ve dealt with what happened. But as I looked at those four little words, my eyes filled faster than I could control.
I’ll never forget you.
Click here to download Never Forget Us and continue reading Erin and Bax’s story now.
Acknowledgments
The idea for Erin and Jay’s story had been floating around my head for a while. I loved the idea of quiet and predictable Erin going off for an uncharacteristic road trip with a sexy soldier. And Bax, well, who wouldn’t want two weeks alone with him? But with everything else going on and other characters shouting louder, I had no idea when I was going to get their story down on paper. That was, until I got a message asking if I wanted to be part of a charity anthology to raise money for Help for Heroes. I jumped at the chance; not only did I have a story ready to go, but my dad was in the army and he supports Help for Heroes any chance he gets, so I knew I had to do it.
It was all well and good until I read the guidelines for the anthology to see the stories preferably needed to end on a HEA and there shouldn’t be a cliffhanger! I tried, I promise, I really tried, but Erin and Jay’s story had a mind of its own and there isn’t much of a HEA for them, and there’s kind of a cliffhanger. Don’t worry though, because there’s more. The second part of their story Never Forget Us is out now, so you can find out if Erin gets her HEA.
As always I want to say a huge thank you to my betas who read this story the second I finished typing and loved it, cried, and even shouted at their Kindle’s despite the awful typos I inflicted on them in my need for feedback. Deanna, Helen, Lindsay, Michelle and Tracy, I couldn’t do this without your support—and abuse. I hope part two makes it up to you.
Deanna, as always, for being my partner in crime, for putting up with my antics and encouraging me forward. What would I do without you?
I want to thank Louise for asking me to be a part her project, there is no way I would’ve written this story any time soon if it wasn’t for you and I want to thank you because I have loved every second of it. Thank you for the opportunity to work with you and all the other incredible authors involved in this anthology. I hope we all help make a difference to people’s lives with what we raise.
Evelyn, again, thank you for your editing skills and trying to teach me new things. I say trying, because I’m sure with every manuscript I send you you’re screaming at me to stop making the same mistakes. I’m sorry, I’m trying!
I couldn’t do this without my loyal readers and the bloggers who always support my books, so a huge thank you to you guys again for doing what you do and spreading the word. Your support really is priceless.
And last but not least, my gorgeous daughter and husband for putting up with me throughout this journey. I love you both more than you could know.
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About the Author
Tracy Lorraine is a M/F and M/M contemporary romance author. Tracy has just turned thirty and lives in a cute Cotswold village in England with her husband, baby girl and lovable but slightly crazy dog. Having always been a bookaholic with her head stuck in her Kindle Tracy decided to try her hand at a story idea she dreamt up and hasn’t looked back since.
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Ruined by Lies #2
Ruined Promises #3
Never Forget Series
Never Forget Him #1
Never Forget Us #2
Everywhere & Nowhere #3
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