The Dark Knight [Part One]

by L. F. Piper

  Ever since then we’ve had the sick bucket.

  Now, after reliving that, I really do want to puke.

  I turn my phone off, without reading Kaydee's reply to my earlier text, get changed and slide into bed. It's only around nine, but I just want to be alone, in the dark.

  ***

  “Emilia, honey. It's time to wake up, school starts soon.” I can feel the bed dip when my mum sits on the edge, stroking the hair away from my face. I eventually pry my eyelids open, they’re thick with sleep and swollen from crying.

  “I feel terrible, mum. Can I stay at home today and see how I feel tomorrow? I can't even hold water down right now.” I'm lying through my damn teeth, but I genuinely do feel terrible for lying straight to my mother’s face. I haven't tried to eat or drink anything yet, but my stomach is tied in too many knots to even think about it.

  “Oh, sweetie. Of course. You stay in bed and get some rest. I'm supposed to be out of the house all day today, but I can cancel my plans and stay with you instead, if you want me to?” I shake my head no. I need to be alone.

  “It's fine, mum. It's not like you can do anything for me anyway. I'm just going to lie here and if I feel like I can stomach something later, I'll start with some water and then maybe soup or toast if it stays down.” She nods and approves of my plan before leaving my bedroom and closing the door quietly behind her. I roll over and close my eyes. I'm determined to go back to sleep and eventually, I do.

  When I next wake up, it's to a whimpering noise on the other side of my door. I get up to open it and Pearl runs in, jumping at my shins. I can’t imagine how long it took her to make it up the stairs all on her own. She needs a doggy stairlift. I pick her up, drop her on the bed and go into the bathroom. After I've peed and brushed my teeth, I fall back into bed and hug Pearl tightly to my chest. She falls asleep, but I'm not tired anymore. I check my watch and it's only nine forty-five. I wonder what all the kids will do at school today because I'm not there for them to push around? Maybe they'll move onto someone else? I'm not going to find out because I'm not going in tomorrow either.

  I mooch around all day, lying in bed, talking to Pearl, smoking and listening to the most depressing tracks on my iPod.

  Avril Lavigne – My Happy Ending suddenly starts blasting through my headphones and I start tearing up, again. It isn't the first time I've cried today and probably won't be the last. Just the word happy makes me feel emotional and this isn’t even a happy song. I haven't been happy for at least a week, and although that might not sound like very long, I'm never normally sad. This week has felt like a fucking lifetime.

  The next song begins to play and it's Robyn - Dancing on my Own. The song instantly reminds me of the house party at Caleb’s place.

  Turns out I was the girl he took home.

  Just seeing the title of the song shimmy across the screen makes me blubber even harder and Pearl whimpers at my side. I pull myself together for her. Just because I'm unhappy doesn't mean she should be.

  I flick tracks and Papa Roach – American Dreams starts to play. The dreams I had of America when we were still in England have morphed into hellish nightmares, that’s for damn sure.

  I give up and turn my headphones off, then climb out of bed and carry Pearl downstairs with me. Everything is completely silent, and it lifts me slightly. I love how placid the whole house is today. No swearing coming from my dad's office, nothing is being smashed in the kitchen by my mother and, well, Dylan is normally quiet anyway. But still. It's nice that's it's so empty. Peaceful.

  I let Pearl chase a few butterflies in the garden and I sit at the patio table, the warm rays from the sun hitting my back as I smoke a cigarette. I'll be quite surprised if my teeth don't fall out soon. I still haven't eaten or drunk anything, and my tummy is past growling angrily at me. There's just a heavy ache inside me now.

  I switch my phone on when I'm comfy and ignore all the notifications that immediately pop up on the screen.

  Emilia: So, I blagged the day off school today. Everything and everyone here suck. I got stood up on a date yesterday and I just know the whole school will be laughing at me. I really wish you were here with me xo

  I send the quick text to Phoebe. I have no words that can explain how much I fucking miss and need her right now. It's probably around two-thirty back home and I nearly burst into tears when she texts me back.

  Phoebe: Oh no! I wish I was with you too :( This might make you feel a bit better – Marnie Carlton finally lost her virginity... Gemma Matthews took it!! Can you believe it? The first time she gets with someone and it's a fucking girl! Haha xo

  I nearly drop my bloody phone after she drops that bombshell. Gemma Matthews is basically another Anya, but less psychotic. She’s bullied Marnie Carlton since bloody playschool and now she's sleeping with her? What is happening to the world?

  Oh God, I hope Anya isn’t being a grade-A bitch to me because she wants inside my knickers!

  I don’t even want to think about that… Cringe. Barf. Die.

  I still haven't told Phoebe that I slept with Caleb – numerous times – still haven't even mentioned Caleb to her period. I'm too ashamed to admit it to her, not because of Caleb, but because of the reaction my body has towards him. It's totally embarrassing, and I don't need Phoebe making fun of me about it too. I know she would only be messing around, but I also know it would hit too close to home for me.

  Emilia: You are kidding me? She's hated Marnie since we were like, five? And what about Gemma? Did you know she liked girls? I can't believe it! xo

  I don't have to wait long for Phoebe's reply.

  Phoebe: I know! No one had a clue about either of them, but guess what? Now they are together... Like dating each other! It's crazy! xo

  Jesus! Everything has been turned upside down.

  Emilia: WOW! I don't even know what to say! Wait, are you in school? How are you texting? xo

  Phoebe: Mum wrote me a note to get out of PE today. The Devil himself delivered my period this month. I'm watching everyone get sweaty and nasty, while I chill out on the grass. They're playing rounders and Hayley was last to be picked, as usual. She's already let go of her bat while missing the ball twice! She's a danger to us all and should be forced to wear a hazard sign around her neck xo

  I laugh when I receive her message. Hayley is in the same tutor as Phoebe, the one I used to be a part of too. She's the biggest disaster I've ever known. She falls over her own feet, drops things constantly, walks into things all the time. There is an accident waiting around every corner for the poor girl.

  Emilia: Well twice is good, for her. Normally it's five times more than that. Maybe she's improving, slightly?... You're right, probably

  not. Hey, thank you for my mixtape! I know I've already thanked you for my gifts, but I've not had any time to actually listen to the music, until now! xo

  There is a meaning behind all of the songs Phoebe put together for me, but what she doesn't realise is, some days I've really needed the boost to even get myself to school. Just listening to the words makes me feel stronger inside. Only a little bit, but it's stronger than I was feeling thirty minutes ago.

  Phoebe: You're welcome boo :) I'm glad you like it! I have to go now; next period is starting soon, and I need to get my books. I'll call you later if I have time after I've done my homework. Love you, girl xo

  I rapidly text her back and tell her that's fine and to have a good lesson. Classes at Evergreen don't start until nine-thirty and they finish at three-thirty. I suppose that's the only decent thing about going to Richmond – the classes finish at three. They start earlier, but I'd rather start earlier and finish earlier than the other way around. The only problem is getting out of bed in the morning. Mornings are not my forte. Right now, I much prefer sitting at home and not worrying about school at all.

  I know I shouldn't, but I decide to brave it and check the notifications on my phone.

  Here goes nothing.

  First, I look through my texts
because there is less of them.

  Kaydee: You don't have to be such a bitch!

  Oh, the fucking nerve of her! I don't reply, I just delete. What on earth would I even say to that? Has she fallen down the rabbit hole and bumped her head? There's one from Holden. It just has a bunch of laughing emojis. Fucking asshole.

  Caleb: Why aren't you at school?

  Screw him! None of this would've started if he had just left me the fuck alone. Luckily, I don't have read receipts activated on my phone, so no one knows when I saw their messages, or if I saw them.

  Caleb: You either tell me or I'll come over and find out myself.

  I don't even have it in me to run around the house, locking all the windows and doors. Fuck him. If he comes, then he comes. I'm past caring.

  Mum: H-ope/youre feelin g better, Me. H-ave u tried 2 eat nething yet? xxX

  That’s the only text that warrants a reply, purely to correct her atrocious texting skills. It’s disgusting, and she needs to take a class.

  Please meet Mother Dearest, the Techno-Virgin.

  Emilia: Hi, mum. It’s Em… You need help… No, I’m not feeling any better yet. I had some water, but it came straight back up again. Please could you pick some cigarettes up for me on your way home? xx

  She replies telling me she will, but she won't be back until tonight. I think that’s what it says anyway. I’m no IT code hacker and that is basically what she just sent me – a freaking code. She has some coffee date this morning with someone, then a lunch date with someone different and yoga class later on this afternoon with another someone else. Who does yoga after a lunch date? Wouldn't you exercise on an empty stomach, so you don't make yourself sick? Or are you supposed to exercise once you have some energy and something to burn off? Fuck if I know. I really need to look into some exercises I can do that will flatten my backside a little before next term. I've always been totally cool with my big bum, until Anya so helpfully pointed it out. A hundred times. Now I'm all body conscience and shit, I really don't like it.

  I log onto Facebook and Twitter. I have loads of messages, making fun of the incident that happened last night. I delete all of them and block some of the people. Anya, Christina and Kaydee being the main ones. They can always get someone to message me for them, but I'll just block them too. I don't know why I didn't do this earlier. I'm supposed to be smart, not some slow fucking bimbo.

  ***

  The rest of the day passes by quickly and I've had no more notifications on my phone and no more texts from Caleb, thank God. He didn't come over either, not that I'm aware of anyway and I’m positive he would’ve at least pushed me around a little after he broke in.

  I go to bed at eight, just wanting to avoid my family really. Mum comes in to check on me at nine, once she's cleaned up dinner and showered. “Knock knock. How are you feeling, baby girl?” She has a lot of pet names for us kids. Dad just calls me kid and Dylan bud. Mum comes up with new ones all the time. I've been known as sweetheart, Em, Lia, even flower sometimes. Sweetie is a popular one and so is honey. I think they are her favourites. Gran always calls me flossy, which I've never understood. What is wrong with just calling people by their given names? Wouldn't that be easier? I don't know.

  “Not any better, mum. Can I stay home tomorrow and hopefully over the weekend I'll be better and get some energy back?” Mum strokes my check and nods.

  “I think that's a good idea. Your face feels quite warm. Have you been sick a lot today?” I don't know why my face would feel warm? She opened the door, though and so I'm walking right on through it.

  “Yeah, a couple of times. I don't have anything left inside me to bring up anymore. Hopefully I'll be able to eat tomorrow, and fingers crossed it stays down. Maybe I have a fever too?” I haven't been sick, and I don't plan on eating anything either. One way to ensure my ass has no chance of growing any bigger.

  “Alright, flower. I'll let you get some sleep. I'm out again all day tomorrow, but you just call me if you need me for anything, okay?” There she goes with the name calling again.

  Sheesh.

  “I will. Thanks, mum. Could you not wake me up in the morning please? I want to sleep in and leave the door open slightly, just in case Pearl wants to come or go? She woke me this morning and I ended up feeling worse.” So, I'm only sort of lying. Pearl did wake me, but if anything, she kind of cheered me up. Seeing that beautiful furry face. Man, I love her.

  “Sure. I can do that. I'll be out quite early, so I'll let Pearl outside first, that way she won’t wake you for a potty break. Oh, I almost forgot, I'll put your cigarettes on your desk. Goodnight, sweetie. I love you.” She leans down and kisses me on my forehead.

  “Night, mum. I love you too.” She looks back and smiles at me, before exiting my room and tightly closing the door behind her.

  Ahh, silence.

  So blissful.

  I drift off to sleep in a matter of seconds.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

  Caleb

  Show me how much you like it because you sure as fuck can’t tell me

  She hasn't been at school for two days and she hasn't responded to any of my texts. Again. I threatened her with going over to her house if she didn't answer me, but she still chose to ignore me. I thought she was smarter than that.

  I made the decision, when I didn't see her this morning at her locker, that I really am going to drive over to her house as soon as the bell sounds for lunch. What? Boy still needs to get some kind of education. I haven't seen or spoken to Emilia since Wednesday. It's now Friday and I'm going out of my fucking mind.

  She’s still fucking mine.

  Anya filled me in on what they did to her Wednesday night. I'm not stupid, I know that's why she hasn't been here. I'm a shitty person; we know that already, but I thought their plan was genius and it annoyed me that I didn't think of it myself. On the other hand, I'm fucking raging that they did that to her. All of Emilia's feelings belong to me.

  I slapped Anya for being so selfish. That was a wrong move for so many reasons. Not the reasons you’re thinking of, though. I slapped her? Big deal, that isn't the issue here. She fucking deserved it for going behind my back and hurting Emilia. The issue I’ll have to deal with is Anya being more than a massive pain in my ass now, thinking there is something more than just sex happening between Em and I. There’s always been something going on between us. I mean, shit, the whole school is aware that we fuck. I’ve warned off too many punks for word not to spread like wildfire, but I’ve never made it so fucking obvious to Anya before now. She’s scared away a million chicks, give or take, and I’ve not once given her shit about it. I basically just told her in flashing bold letters that Emilia and I are a something. I don’t even know what a something is. I just want her in my bed. Fuck, I don’t know what I want.

  I don’t normally give a fuck what people think or say about me, but I like my business to be somewhat private. Especially as I don’t fully understand myself how I feel about Emilia. Anyway, what I do with someone in my bed is no business to anyone. Especially Anya.

  She’s going to be pissed that I chose to stand up for Emilia and not her.

  She’s going to be doubly pissed that I don't give a shit about how she feels.

  She will be epically pissed when she finds out I fucked Emilia this afternoon.

  It hasn't happened yet, but we all know that I can have Emilia dropping her skimpy little panties in five seconds flat. I'll be slamming inside her another ten seconds after that and once we're finished, she can go back to hating me and wishing I didn't exist.

  The bell rings and I jump out of my seat and make it all the way to the carpark, when Anya stops me. “Hey, where are you going? Do you want to head back to mine for lunch? I'm super hungry and you've got exactly what I want to eat.” She wraps her scrawny body around me and my dick isn't feeling anything, not even a twitch.

  “No, I've got things I need to do.” I push her away from me and she scowls.

  “You're going
to see her, aren't you?” Anya is kind of pretty, but she looks fuck ugly when she pulls faces. She looks even worse than usual today. The bruise that Emilia gave her has turned to an ugly greeny yellow, but she's tried to hide it underneath thick masses of makeup. Her face is mostly orange and there's a line framing it around her cheeks and chin. Her neck is a completely different color to her face. Add that to the scowl she’s currently rocking, and she looks like a fucking broke ass hoe. I shudder and that takes a lot. Someone my size, that looks like me, we make others shudder. We don’t do the shuddering.

  A kid uploaded a video of the fight that they had the other day. Emilia gave Anya a swift right hook; completely missed her target but clipped the side of Anya's face. She needs to work on her aim a little more, but I could definitely help her with that. While I have her pinned to the bed beneath me.

  “What I do has fuck all to do with you, Anya. Stay out of my damn business. Go and suck someone else’s cock for your lunch.” I get into my car and slam the door behind me. Anya stares at me, mouth wide open. She obviously still thinks I care about her for some messed up reason. She's probably wondering why I told her to go and suck off somebody else. It's fairly simple for someone with half a brain; I couldn't give a fuck about her or what she does, even if I tried to.