Forever Changed Part One: A College Bully RH Romance (Forever Changed Duet Book 1)

by Amber Nicole

  I shudder and try to remove her face from my mind. Her sandy eyes haunt my dreams. One mistake that will never leave me. It changed me. It changed us all.

  “Babe, don’t. I know where your head is going. Stop. We didn’t know. It’s not your fault.” J says, seeing my dilemma.

  Coming closer he pulls me into a hug. I wrap my arms around him and breathe into his neck. He sighs then kisses the top of my head and I cuddle closer.

  “Will I ever get those images from my mind, J?” I ask, and he shrugs.

  “I don’t know man. I try not to think of that night, and the fact that Penny fucking taped it haunts me more than what occured.” I groan and lean back pressing my lips to his in a quick kiss. “At least I have you,” I whisper, getting lost in his hazel eyes for a moment. They look troubled. He shoves me back and laughs. “Yeah man. You’ll always have me.”

  I move around the counter and sit on the bench. Placing my head in my hands, I moan.

  “Fuck, what are we going to do?” I ask, glancing his way. He shrugs his shoulders then inches closer, stepping between my spread thighs, “We do what we have to. We play the game, but we don’t have to be as cruel as Penny wants.” There’s no space between us now. He lifts my head and grips the short strands in his fingers, tugging. I groan and he smiles. “We can do this, Lay. We have no other choice.” He whispers before kissing my forehead, slowly moving lower until he reaches my mouth. I groan into the kiss and grip his face pressing my lips harder to his.

  I’ve loved Jase Hawthorne since we were freshmen in high school. We may play for both sides, but when it comes to us, no matter what's going on or who we’re seeing, they all know the score. He will always be in my life in some way. I can’t ever picture a life without him beside me.

  The back door slams open, breaking our bubble.

  “So we need a plan,” East says, ignoring our embrace. He no longer bats an eye when it comes to me and his brother. I guess catching us as many times as he has made him immune. Jase steps back and takes the seat next to me. He turns to face me and I know from that look in his eye we’ll be continuing this later. I shiver and bite my lip, watching as his eyes heat. East coughs and we break our stare off, giving him our full attention.

  “Well since I don’t have a smoothie, how about we order some pizza?” he says, glaring my way.

  “Seriously? After everything Penny just said you can eat right now?” I snap, and he raises a brow at me.

  “Yeah man, I can because I’m not acting like a little pussy, like the two of you. We knew from the start that we had to do this. What the fuck changed in the last twenty-four hours?” he growls before storming to the living room.

  “I met an angel,” I whisper, and Jase looks at me as if I’ve lost my mind. Who knows maybe I have?

  Nine

  Carson

  “You got this, my little star. These girls will be some of your best friends, and I am there holding your hand always.” I look up at Mama and give her a bright smile, licking my ice cream cone once more before it drips all over my hand. Sticky fingers are the worst. “What if they don’t like me? They all seem so beautiful and high class. I’m just a rancher’s daughter from Kansas.”

  “Carson Star Matthews! ” she snaps looking at me aghast, “You’re not too old for soap in that pretty mouth, young lady. You are brilliant, compassionate, and beautiful inside and out. Don’t ever let someone make you think you don’t belong among the pretty people.”

  I roll my eyes, but nod my head. “I miss you Mama.” I sniffle looking at the horizon, knowing this is just another amazing dream that's about to end.

  “I miss you too baby, but we will see each other again. Keep the faith, my little Star.” I lean over to give her a hug, as she's slowly disappearing.

  My eyes flutter, and I groan at the bright light shining through my window. Note to self: buy blackout curtains. I don’t usually sleep in this late, but since I have no pressing chores to do this morning, I indulged. I grab my phone from under my pillow and open up my messages. Connor sent me a ‘good morning beautiful’ message, and it makes me feel all fluttery. Gah, that boy is too perfect sometimes. I sit up against my pillows and scroll through social media like usual. Shouting sounds from the courtyard outside, and I snicker. Seems someone is arguing about having to carry their own luggage and the other person is saying, “I’m not your slave. I’m your brother.”

  I roll my eyes and go back to my phone. The life of the elite and privileged I guess. After twenty minutes of watching mindless videos of people making fools of themselves, or before I can get caught in any more thirst traps, I roll out of bed and grab my shower caddy. In all my excitement yesterday I never did find where the showers are. I open the door to my room and peek outside. It's still empty. I guess Sadie will be here later. I pad over to the bathroom and do my morning routine, before leaving the dorm completely and finding the showers. I walk into the marble tiled room to a whole lot of nudity. Girls running around topless, and guys in their tight boxers. I may be a virgin, but I have eyes, and these guys are way too hot to be walking around like that. Maybe this is a guys only area. No, there’s a co-ed sign. Oh that’s just great. I hesitantly walk back in and keep my eyes straight ahead to the stall all the way at the end. Someone moans from the shower next to me, and I sigh. Welcome to college I guess. The fun is only just beginning.

  e

  I walk out of the co-ed bathrooms, drying my hair, and shivering as I hustle back to my room. With all the pomp they put into the dorms and common rooms, you would think they could upgrade the showers. I barely rinsed all the conditioner from my hair, and the water turned ice cold. Someone got a laugh from the high pitch squeal I made. Thankfully, it’s just down the hall, so I don’t have to do the ‘oh don’t look at me, I’m just walking to my room in a towel. Nothing to see here people’ thing. The door to my room is wide open. Shoot! Did I not shut it all the way? I peek my head in, and a girl with short blonde hair, and purple streaks is standing unsteadily on the sofa.

  “Woah, careful.” I drop my caddy and rush up behind her before she falls, gripping her hip to help her down to solid ground.

  “Oh, thank you. I thought my ass was a goner.” She giggles, and turns, giving me a huge smile.

  “Happy to help, but what were you doing?” I ask. I assume this is Sadie, my roommate. I've been waiting for her to show.

  “I was putting a small security camera in the frame. It faces the front door, so I'll know if someone tries to break in and mess with my stuff again.” I look at her in horror. Hidden cameras? Breaking in? Is she a total whackadoo?

  “Oh, no girl, don't worry I was going to let you know. I'm not crazy, promise. I just have a lot of expensive music equipment, and last year someone stole one of my guitars.”

  Oh that's awful. I grab her into a hug, and she laughs.

  “So you're a hugger. Noted.” I instantly release her and step back.

  “I am so sorry. Boundaries. I hardly know you. I know. My whole family is big on hugs.” I look at her sheepishly.

  “No stress. It was nice. I've never been hugged by a stranger in a towel before. I can cross that off my bucket list now,” she says with a genuine smile. Towel? I glance down. My cheeks heat and I stutter. "Oh my, I should get dressed. I'm Carson by the way if you didn't already know but please call me Cara. You're Sadie right?"

  She rolls her eyes. "Unfortunately. But please call me Sassy. I hate the name that was chosen for me.”

  “Sassy, I love it. Do you have any plans today? I need to take a walk around the campus, get familiar with where my classes are. Wanna come? We could maybe get some lunch?" I ask her, twisting my hands together nervously. I’ve never been great at making girlfriends.

  I know and I’m joining a sorority. It's insane. My girls back home have been with me since we were in diapers, so we have always been friends, but other girls are just super mean, or they wanted to use me to get closer to Memphis.

  She plops on the couch, a
nd looks at me.

  "Yes, I'm starving. All I ate on the plane was warm nuts. They ran out of the brie and fruit platter I love. So bummed. Hurry up and get dressed. I'll show you around," she says, then sighs. "Why do you have to be so tall, and gorgeous?" I pause before reaching my door.

  "I'm sorry?" I say in confusion.

  "Oh, did I say that out loud? Sorry I meant for that to be in my head."

  I giggle, and spin, opening the door to my room.

  "Oh okay, well thank you, sweet cheeks. I wouldn't say I'm gorgeous, but it's nice to hear." I throw her a wink then walk into my room. I’m about to close the door when she groans.

  "She's sweet as apple pie, too! The Hawthornes are going to eat her for dinner."

  I peek over my shoulder and she's biting her lip, and shaking her head. Who are the Hawthornes? Why does she seem so worried? I go to ask, but stop myself. Clothes first, and then me and Miss Sassafras are going to have a chat. I open my closet and look at my options. I have to meet the girls at the Kippa House after lunch so I need to be back here by one at the latest. I pull out some shorts and a tight pink tank top along with some undies and a bra. It is hotter than Hell and half of Georgia here. I don’t think I’ll need to unpack my jeans for some time yet.

  I quickly dress then open my door to a heated conversation at our front door. Sassy slams it in someone's face then sighs, while shaking her head.

  “Is everything okay?” I ask softly. I don’t want to pry. I mean we just met a few minutes ago, but she looks upset. She wipes under her eye and gives me a big fake smile. “Yeah girl, let’s get some food.”

  “Okay.” I give her a smile back and move closer to the door. I open it and can’t help peeking both ways before walking out into the hall with her behind me. Whoever was there is long gone now.

  e

  “So that is the building with your English, and political science classes,” Sassy tells me pointing out another light brown brick building. Ugh at this point I should just put different colored ribbons on the trees in front of the doors.

  “I’m going to be so lost. Why does everything have to look the same?”

  She laughs and grabs my hand. “Come on, someone promised me lunch, and I’m starving. We’ll do another walk around after. I need sustenance girl. I’m withering away,” she says with a dramatic hand on her forehead as if she’s about to faint. I can’t help but laugh at her antics.

  “Okay, but you pick a place. Something with lots of fat, and carbs. Today is my cheat day.” I give her a wink and she groans.

  “Please, Cara, tell me you're not one of those people.”

  “Those people?” I laugh again and give her an eyebrow lift.

  “Yeah, those people that exercise, or, god forbid, run in the early mornings.”

  The look of horror on her face is priceless.

  “Sorry girl, but my daddy owns a ranch, and I’ve been up milking the cows and feeding the chickens at the crack of dawn since I was six years old.”

  She looks at me as if I said I murder cute innocent puppies in my spare time. “I don’t think we can be friends. I need sleep. My first class is at eleven in the morning.”

  I pause at that. “That's an option?” I ask, shaking my head. “Don’t worry I’ll be quiet, but you may wake up to breakfast. I love to cook, and bake.”

  She snorts. “Girl, I burn water. You can do all the cooking. Maybe save my parents some of the cost from all the fast food I eat.” At that point her stomach lets out the loudest gurgle. I grip her arm cackling, almost falling down from laughing so hard. She tugs me back towards our dorm, and to the left to a small cafe. Opening the door I pause and take in the aromas, and let out an obscene moan.

  “Whoa, girl calm down,” Sassy says and moves us to a table in the corner.

  “Sorry, but oh my Dolly, this place smells incredible. I wonder if they’re hiring. I’d love to work in a place like this.” I look around at the cute little booths and open kitchen. I love that you can watch your food being made.

  “Oh most definitely. I’ll introduce you to the owner after we eat,” she says, glancing around distractedly.

  “That would be amazing, thank you.” I think I’ve found my first college friend here, and she’s awesome.

  A cute waiter stops by, takes our drink order, drops off our menus, then rushes off.

  “So tell me. How is the Kippa Nu house? I have to swing by there this afternoon.” She drops her menu and gapes at me.

  “Good Lord, girl. Why in the hell would you go there willingly?” Oh that sounds promising.

  “I’m a legacy. I opted to live in the dorms, but I’ll have to rush. Are any of the girls nice?” I pause and twist my hands in a nervous gesture. “My mama told me so many amazing stories, but all the movies I’ve seen make them seem like a house full of mean girls.”

  She chokes on her gum and snorts.

  “You’re a sorority girl? Oh babe, there’s no saving you.”

  “What do you mean?” Before she can reply, the waiter comes back.

  “Hey sorry about that. We’re seriously short staffed. What can I get you beautiful ladies?” Sassy laughs and jumps from her seat, giving him a big hug.

  “Milo, this is my roommate Cara. Cara, this here is one of my best friends Milo.” I give him a small smile and a wave. “Hi, it’s nice to meet you Milo.”

  He blushes and looks down, biting the ring through his lip. Sassy smacks his arm, then steps on his tippy toes and presses a big kiss on his pink cheek. He clears his throat and runs his hand through his short red hair.

  “Right, um what would you guys like?” he squeaks out. Oh my, he is too cute. I put him out of his misery and grab Sassy’s hand, yanking her back to her seat.

  “I’ll have an iced hazelnut coffee, just cream and one of your amazing cheese danishes please.” He gives me a nod then takes off. “Umm, I thought you were hungry?” I question and she rolls her eyes. “Milo knows what I want. I used to eat here all the time last year.”

  Oh that makes sense.

  “So, boyfriend of yours?” I ask, nodding towards Milo who’s trying not to look this way. She laughs so loud the girl behind us jumps.

  “Oh babe, I think I love you. He is amazing, but sadly no, I’m gay. Milo is one of my best friends. He had a hard time last year so we kinda banded together.”

  I give her a smile and sigh in relief. Yep, Sassy and I are going to be great friends. We start to discuss our favorite movies when Milo drops our food off.

  “Thank you,” I say with a smile. He gives me a nod then rushes away. Sassy laughs and takes a bite of her pasta. Damn that looks good, maybe I should have gotten more than a pastry. We eat in comfortable silence, and I take in the relaxed ambiance of this place. It’s still not overcrowded with people, since classes are another few days away, but even the mellow soundtrack playing in the background is relaxing. Milo comes and takes our plates, but Sassy won’t let him leave.

  “You have to have a break soon. Sit. Please,” she says, giving him puppy dog eyes. He chuckles and takes the seat next to her, avoiding my gaze. Do I smell or something? Oh no, is there something in my teeth? I nervously run my tongue over them but I don’t feel anything. Laughter snaps me out of my panic, and I look up into Sassy's questioning eyes. “You okay there, hot stuff?”

  I raise my brows at that nickname and Milo bursts out in a loud chuckle. I nod my head and take a sip of my drink before responding. “I’m fine. Why?” Before she can answer, something outside catches her eye. She turns to Milo and they chat for a few more minutes while I finish my drink.

  I glance at the time and gasp. “Oh no. I need to go. Sassy, would you mind walking me to Kippa House?” Milo snorts and Sassy gives him a look, “Sass at a sorority house? You’re kidding right?” he says then cringes as Sassy smacks his arm. She turns her attention back to me, and I can’t help but notice she’s turned a bit pale. “He’s right babe. Sorority girls and I don't mix well.” I quickly stand and look at my feet.
>
  “Oh okay, yeah, that’s fine. I better leave so I’m not any later then. It was nice meeting you Milo.” I throw some cash on the table, then spin, and walk out the door. “Shit,” I hear mumbled from behind me as the door swings shut. I look left and right, trying to remember which way is Sorority Row, when someone comes up from behind me and grabs my arm, giving me a small tug. Before I can panic, Sassy says, “I must really like you, Carson Matthews.”

  I giggle with relief and place my head on her shoulder for a moment. “Thank you.”

  “Yeah, yeah. Let’s go meet some bitches.”

  We arrive at Sorority Row and I can't stop the gasp from escaping my lips. It looks like one of those National Lampoon movies. Half naked guys drinking out of red cups, moving furniture out to the front lawn, and hot girls running around practically naked.

  “Girl look, it's like build a bitch central.”

  Oh my god, I can’t believe she just said that, and so loud too.

  “Sassy!” I scold, “please you can not say that, especially here.”

  She rolls her eyes and points out my future sisters. “Cara look around at all these Barbie wannabes.”

  I don’t see what she sees. Some of these girls look nice.

  “Are you sure you don’t want to skip this rush thing, and just hang out with me? No offense girl, but you don’t seem like the sorority type. You’re too real and genuine. Not one bit of you has an ounce of silicone.”

  Now I’m the one rolling my eyes. “Sassy, chill. You make them sound like a cult.”

  “Might as well be,” she mutters under her breath. I glance around, making sure no one is listening to my sassafras roommate, and a girl is giving me a glare. Great. I’m starting to regret asking her to accompany me.

  I pass a few more girls. They seem to be in a hurry, and one bumps right into me, but ignores it. Well okay then. I reach a large white staircase with at least ten steps leading to a pearl white plantation style house. A giant K and N are presented proudly over the large double doors. I shake out my hands helping to remove the nerves, then I take the first step. Sassy groans behind me but follows. We reach the top and I press my shaking finger on the bell, then move back as if I was shocked. Why am I so scared? This is supposed to be a happy day. No one comes to the door so I try again, and again, and again. I ring the bell and wait. I was told to come here today, so why is no one home? For a house of twenty plus girls someone should always be here.