Tainted Romance

by Simone Elise

  ‘My bed, Allie. I’m taking you to my bed.’ His voice flooded my head. Answering my thoughts.

  My eyes widened. “I’m not having sex with you.” That would seal my fate with him. Hell, he couldn’t even talk to me before my accident, and now he wanted to have sex! Was he crazy?!

  Did men just act on their dick all the time?

  “If you want sex, go find someone else. No way are we crossing that bridge,” I forced out. I went to step back from him, but I stepped back into the bed. He took the opportunity to trap me.

  ‘I want you naked, and in my bed, Allie, and I’m not going to stop there.’ His voice was so seductive, and so alluring. Pulling on everything inside me.

  “Get out of my head,” I gritted out and put a hand on his chest, trying to push him back. “Out now.”

  ‘I know you want me.’ His hands ran up my sides until he was cupping my face, locking my eyes with his. He was towering over me. ‘My bed and you. That’s all I want.’

  “If we do that, you can’t change your mind come tomorrow. You will want me more than I want you. You will be sealing your fate with me.”

  ‘Exactly. So, you know I can’t change my mind.’

  “I don’t want you to have sex with me just so you can’t change your mind. Also, get out of my head!”

  “I want to lock this in, Allie. I want you. Every day. For the rest of my life. I want to mark you. You have no idea how badly I want to mark you.” His hand pushed my bra and tank top straps off my shoulder, and he lowered his mouth to the base of my neck and kissed it. “Right there.”

  “I’m not having sex with you,” I stumbled out. I started to get shaky on my feet. As if he knew he was doing it to me, his hands gripped my hips.

  “Fine. We can watch Misfits all night.” Zane dipped his head. “I brought the box set before.”

  I narrowed my eyes at him. “You did not.”

  “I came with the intention of getting you back to my place. If I have to dangle Misfits in front of you, I will.”

  “You actually brought it? You don’t even like it!”

  “I’ll suffer if it means you will come home with me. It might grow on me, seeing you like it so much.” He shrugged. “So, come home with me?”

  “How am I meant to get out of here, without being discharged?” I arched my eyebrows at him, seeing as he was coming up with this plan.

  “I do have some pull believe it or not.” He smiled. “So, are you coming?”

  I shouldn’t. I really shouldn’t. I dropped my head, breaking eye contact with him. I shouldn’t do it. Nope. It was a bad idea. I knew what he wanted. He wanted to have sex. If I went with him, there was a chance that would happen. I couldn’t control myself around him. I wouldn’t be able to stop myself.

  ‘I’m planning on that.’

  My head snapped up hearing that. “Get out of my head!”

  He smirked. “Just stop thinking about it and come home with me? I’m not asking you to have sex with me,” he leaned in, his mouth going to my ear, “Right now.”

  I took a shaky breath in.

  “Come on, Allie. Don’t make me beg.” He sighed. “But I will if I have to.”

  “Zane Harris doesn’t beg.”

  “I do for you.”

  What was with the change? Had I missed something? Clearly, I had missed something because he wanted nothing to do with me when I said I wasn’t fighting our bond anymore. I told him I was ready. He ignored me to the point I was leaving, and now he suddenly changes his mind?

  No, not possible.

  Just like everything, Zane will change his mind again. He doesn’t want me. History tells the truth. One minute Zane will speak to me, and the next he won’t even acknowledge me.

  He said he loved me. If he really loved me, he wouldn’t treat me like that.

  He was just panicking because I was in an accident.

  ‘No, I’m not.’

  “Out!” I snapped. “Out of my head!”

  “You know you could always reach into mine. Answer your own questions. You think I’m not serious, and then read my mind.” His hands went around my back, and he pulled me into his chest. His arms wrapping around me protectively.

  I closed my eyes. He made it sound easy. It wasn’t easy. My hands gripped his shoulders. I could feel him, literally, so I should be able to reach into his mind. I listened to his heart beating, and loving the rhythm.

  She’s not going to believe me. I could say it over and over, but her mind is set. Well, what can I do to change it? God, if only she knew how crazy she made me. How much I needed her. Didn’t she know my one fear was her leaving? Had I not made that clear to her?

  Her leaving had been what our first fight was over, accepting the fact she would one day just disappear from my life.

  My eyes jolted open. I could hear him.

  She really thought I was going to change my mind? The only mind changing was hers.

  “I can hear you,” I mumbled, shocked. His head snapped down.

  “You were listening?”

  I nodded my head and looked up. “Our first fight, I don’t remember it.” I wanted him to remind me.

  “Taylor had just told me you were leaving. His mom knew from yours. You said your mate was a jerk to Blake, and you were still leaving. We went to the same place for tea. I was on a date. I was furious with you. It was the one time you reached into my mind, and I had felt it coming, so I knew what to think.” His hands cupped my face. “And we had our first fight. Over you leaving.”

  I recalled the night now. It was when Dianne and mom thought Taylor was my mate. They were testing me for a reaction. I had given them a reaction but not over Taylor, over Zane.

  I nodded. “I was outside when you were yelling in my mind. It is the one time I wished we were face to face so I could read your reaction.”

  “Well, you heard my reaction,” he scoffed.

  “We’ve had a lot of fights since then,” I pointed out. “Like the one where you accused me of locking you out and planning an attack on your family. I didn’t know my wolf was dying then. That was the reason you couldn’t reach me.”

  He cringed. “I was hoping you had forgotten about that.”

  It was my turn to scoff. “You really hurt me that night. Ryder said you wouldn’t have meant what you said, but I knew you did.”

  “I was angry.” He lifted my head up. “When did you speak to Ryder?”

  “I ran into him on the way out. I told him you were my mate.”

  He rolled his eyes. “Explains why he wasn’t surprised when I told him.”

  I shrugged.

  Everything we had gone through had led me to this point. All the fights we have had. All the conversations we did and didn’t have. Him ignoring me. Me declaring I wasn’t fighting the pull to him anymore. All of that led me to this point.

  Did I go with him or not? I looked him in the eye. Should I trust him? He had proven one thing to me, and that was he wasn’t trustworthy. If you really loved someone, you wouldn’t put them through all that heartache.

  Wiping my wolf.

  Not telling me.

  All of it.

  Someone that loved you wouldn’t do that. Would they?

  “Trust me, Allie. Please just once,” he whispered, dropping his forehead to mine. “Give me a chance to prove to you I’m worth a risk.”

  Then if I did trust him and he did mean he loved me, what did that mean? That I would stay here and be with him? That meant staying in the pack. That meant taking a huge responsibility. Was I even capable of that? I wasn’t a leader.

  Anything I started I usually failed. School. The pack. Family. They all have a failure tick next to them so why the hell was I thinking that he would be different?

  I closed my eyes. I would screw this up. I would screw up his chances to be a great leader.

  These were all reasons for me to not go. I think I could give a thousand reasons, but I
had one reason to go, and that was because I loved him.

  Curse the day I ever fell in love with Zane Harris.

  “Come home with me, Allie?” He kissed the side of my head. “Trust me just once. I won’t let you down again.”

  Say no. Say no. Say no. Say no.

  I started biting my bottom lip.

  He was asking me to trust him, just once. I could do that, couldn’t I? I was more than willing to not fight our connection anymore so I could just risk it, just once, and come tomorrow if he does anything to warrant me leaving, I would.

  “Ok.”

  He pulled back. “Really?”

  “Yes.” I pulled my hands from his shoulders and looked up at him. “But we are only watching Misfits, and that could be all night because I’m not tired.”

  He nodded his head smirking. “Trust me; I’m not going to sleep if you are awake.”

  “Well, you have to let go of me, so I can pack my stuff,” I said, smiling when he hadn’t let go of me right away.

  He sighed. “Fine.” He took his hands off me and stepped out of the way. “Wait a sec, stand still,” he said, and I did as he asked. He pushed my hair to the side, and I frowned when I felt him take my piercing out. “You can pack now,” he said after taking it out.

  I frowned at him. “Why did you do that?”

  “Because.”

  “Because?”

  “Because my Allie doesn’t have piercings and your smoking days are over, and you are dying your hair back to brunette or blonde, but not black. You’re threatening as black.”

  “And what if I say no?” I challenged him. I had dyed my hair black on purpose because it gave me an edge. I liked how people stepped out of my way. It went with my glare well. So, going back to being a pushover wasn’t something I was seriously considering, but he was saying it like he just laid down the law.

  He smirked. “You can’t say no to me.”

  I pursed my lips. He was right, I couldn’t. Right now would be the perfect example. Me heading to his house, when every single fact it was going to end badly was flashing bright red and in my face.

  Still, I was packing my bag. Only an idiot would do this willingly. Putting their heart on the line to get squeezed. Yep, an idiot. And I was that idiot.

  Chapter Sixty

  Zane had driven us back to his place. He had made a point not to let go of my hand. He only let go when he gets in and out of the car. The pack house was surprisingly quiet when we got there. I was expecting people everywhere considering it was a weekend.

  But it wasn’t.

  It was dead quiet.

  Kind of creepy.

  I had been so focused on how creepy it was not seeing people buzzing around everywhere, that I came to an abrupt halt at Zane’s door when I realized it was his door. I had just followed him to it. Now I realized where I was and more importantly what I was entering.

  “You alright?” Zane frowned at me while unlocking the door. Still holding my hand. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost or something?”

  Yeah, the ghost of the shell I was going to become tomorrow when he decides he wants nothing to do with me. Again. I shook my head.

  “Just never been in your room.” I wasn’t lying I hadn’t been, but I also wasn’t telling him I was currently thinking of all the ways he was going to hurt me come morning.

  Maybe he would just kick me out before anyone woke up? That would make sense. He was ashamed of me.

  “Well, I hope you like it because I’m planning on you spending a lot of time in here.” He opened the door and flicked on the lights, pulling me in when I didn’t automatically follow.

  It was huge, and, surprisingly, really clean! I didn’t hide my reaction.

  “What’s that face for?” he asked, taking my bag off my shoulder.

  “It’s clean,” I stated the obvious. No boy’s room I had been in was ever clean. Blake’s was always dirty; I don’t know how many times I had attempted to clean it, but it would always end up the same.

  “Well, I haven’t been here.” His other hand went to my hip, and he walked backwards, holding on to me.

  “So, you have a cleaner then? Because no way a guy keeps his room this clean.” Hell, I didn’t keep my room this clean. My wardrobe lived on the floor, and I wouldn’t lie and say I didn’t live from it.

  “Yep.” He pulled me in closer. “Stop looking so shocked. I told you I haven’t been here.”

  “So normally it’s a mess, right? Because I hate to break it to you, but I’m not this clean.”

  “You have my permission to make it as dirty as you want.” He stopped us at the couch. “Now, are you sure you aren’t hungry, because I know you like to eat when you watch TV.”

  “How would you know that?”

  “I’ve crashed a few of your binges.”

  “You know you could have actually joined me in person. Not just by reading my mind.” I narrowed my eyes at him. Should I be mad that he just freely entered my mind whenever he felt like it? Everything was telling me I should be but, at the same time, I didn’t have anything to hide.

  I spotted Misfits on the coffee table. “Oh yes, you got the first season!” I let go of him and walked around the couch, sitting down.

  “I actually got them all.” He emptied the bag, scratching the back of his neck. “I could never tell which one was your favorite.”

  “I love all of the episodes with Nathan in them.” I pulled my legs up on the couch, watching, as he put the first disc in.

  “I don’t know if I approve of you having a crush on another guy.”

  I smiled. “Who said I had a crush?”

  “You did. To yourself last time you watched it.” He sat down next to me.

  “You really do spend too much time in my mind, you know that.” I rolled my eyes. Way too much time. “You know I might start invading your thoughts and see how you like it.”

  “I’m not hiding anything from you.” His hand ran up my thigh, and I was cursing myself for wearing a skirt right now.

  He pressed play, and I ripped my eyes off him and onto the TV.

  But his hand wasn’t going anywhere.

  I smiled watching the start, but I felt his eyes on me and not the TV.

  His hand went off my thigh, and I took a deep breath in. Ok, I didn’t realize I was holding my breath, but I inhaled sharply again as his hand moved to my other thigh.

  I tore my eyes off the TV to look at him. I thought I had felt his eyes on me, but I was wrong, they were on the TV.

  His hand moved up, pushing the fabric up. I looked at him again, but his eyes were on the TV.

  I looked back at the TV, and his hand kept moving it up; he was now under the fabric.

  We had just got to the scene where Nathan was trying to get inside his house, and his mom was kicking him out. While I was trying to focus on that, I couldn’t.

  His hand just brushed the strap of my G-string on my thigh while I was positive this wasn’t going to end well.

  He was sending my heart into overdrive. Was it possible for it to beat this fast? He was going to kill me. Was that why he was doing this?

  He groaned feeling it, and then I think his self-control snapped because he moved so quickly. Gripping me by the hips and lifting me up; not settling until he positioned me straddling him. It happened so fast I felt slightly dizzy.

  I knew he moved quicker than most, but that was insane. My head was still spinning when his lips landed on my neck. Slowly licking me then kissing. I arched loving it.

  ‘You know I’m not stopping now, right?’ His voice flooded my mind.

  Why did I get a feeling he preferred talking in my mind than he did out loud?

  He pushed my skirt up around my waist. His hands gripping my ass.

  ‘Allie, you are going to have to tell me to stop. If you want me to stop, you are going to have to say it now.’

  His mouth. So warm. So welcoming. God, I couldn
’t think. I was high on the way his tongue was moving against my skin. It was hot and sending sparks down my spine, and mainly firing me up, right there. God, I had never been this turned on. Not even Blake got me this hot.

  ‘Allie, you’re killing me. Do you want me to stop?’ He took my earlobe in his mouth.

  Did I want him to stop?

  He pulled his mouth from me. “Allie, do you want me to stop?”

  His voice brought me back to the moment. My eyes opening. Staring down at him. No. I did not want him to stop.

  “Fuck no.” And then I crashed my lips against his. He kissed me back with just as much need. His arms wrapped around me and he lifted me up. My legs wrapped around him.

  His lips didn’t leave mine, and I opened my mouth just slightly, and his tongue took advantage of it. He groaned tasting me.

  ‘You have no idea how many times I’ve imagined this.’ His voice lingered with sexual need as it filled my head. That sexual need. He needed something from me. He wanted me.

  My eyes opened, he had imagined this? Why would he imagine this, when he could simply have any woman he wanted?

  ‘I’ve only wanted you for a long time.’ His voice answered my question. I really needed to control my thinking around him if he was in my mind all the time.

  He would know right now how turned on I was, and how much I needed this to hurry up, so he was inside me. God, I needed him in me now!

  ‘I’m hurrying, sweetheart.’ He was serious too, as he lowered me to the edge of the bed. I lifted my arms up in the air as he took my tank top off.

  His fingers made quick work of my bra, and I slipped it off my arms. I gripped his shoulders needing his mouth back on mine, but he was too busy staring at me and inhaling sharply.

  “Geez Christ, Allie, you’re beautiful.” His voice was coated in honest and pure desire.

  “You don’t have to flatter me now.” I ran my hand under his shirt, and his eyes snapped back to mine. My touch bringing him back from his sudden discovery of seeing me half naked.