Again My Love (Kaitlyn and the Highlander Book 9)

by Diana Knightley

  “Yeah, and he’ll be home on our anniversary. I can tell him then.”

  Hayley rested her head against mine, “Remember that whole thing I said about you earlier?”

  “Where you called me a chickenshit?”

  “Yeah, that was an unfortunate display. On further consideration I regret saying it. You’re pretty brave.”

  “Thanks nut job.”

  “We should go celebrate with some margaritas.”

  “I don’t think I’m supposed to drink.”

  “Holy shit, now explain to me why this is something you want to do?”

  “You know why I want to do it.”

  “Yeah, I do babe, and congratulations.”

  “Thanks.” I looked back down at the stick, the little blue plus sign staring up at me.

  The super sucky part about being pregnant?

  Morning sickness kicked my ass again.

  And really brought out my complain-y side. Hayley was very exasperated and called me a big wallowing wuss.

  In answer I threatened to throw up on her shoes.

  She said, “Like you’ve been doing ever since I’ve known you?”

  The cool part about being pregnant? I didn’t have to help us move. I was in my bedroom, shades drawn, moaning from nausea while everyone moved my house. Then they moved me to Campbell Castle with a tray of Rice Krispies treats on my lap like I was an invalid queen.

  I loved my new house so much. It was luxurious and vintage, but state of the art and modern. Zach hummed the whole time he was in the kitchen, dancing and cooking, playing his favorite music epically loud.

  There were no neighbors nearby.

  Which meant Beaty could practice her bagpipes on the back deck. And as she got better at playing she serenaded us when we walked on the beach.

  I walked every afternoon, once the full-day nausea turned into just-in-the-morning nausea, and then finally subsided. As the weeks went by, the nausea ended, and it was becoming summer, the days growing hot.

  I was busy with projects: working on the books, having the art appraised. Emma and I began the work of building a charitable foundation, and worked together through piles of paperwork.

  It was nice being busy.

  It was important to keep my mind occupied because simmering just under my skin was a bubbling pool of self-doubt — was I capable of this?

  The fear — that this was just another moment where ‘Kaitlyn got her hopes up’ — stayed.

  Until day after day slid by on the warm spring breezes and then my hopes settled in with the heat of the summer.

  I was capable.

  Fifty-six - Kaitlyn

  Then, like magic it was July 1. I had suffered the spin of the earth for 156 days, as my friends noted, hardly crying at all. They mentioned I was being rather stoic actually, brave and strong, and surprisingly grown up. Emma teased me that maybe big hormones were actually good for me, making me, for once, kind of reasonable.

  July 1. It was the day before Magnus would come home.

  Zach and Emma shopped for food.

  Quentin and I discussed the plan: he would meet Magnus’s storm. I would stay here and greet him when he arrived at his new house.

  Surprise factor.

  It was going to be so cool.

  I barely ate.

  I hardly slept.

  I went to a yoga class and then, when I needed something to do, watched two movies back to back with Hayley. Afterwards I joked, “What did we just watch?” Because I could barely concentrate over my brain — Magnus was coming home.

  Fifty-seven - Kaitlyn

  And then it was July 2.

  The kind of waiting through moments that crawled by... Had I just spent eight minutes brushing my teeth? Or... I looked down at the toothbrush in my hand. Had I forgotten to brush my teeth?

  I brushed my teeth again.

  I dressed in tiny panties.

  I wore Magnus’s favorite color, a blue dress, flowy and flirty, maternity-style, it fit over my rounded tummy and showed off my tan legs.

  My Highlander was going to go weak in the knees.

  I ate some breakfast because Zach made me.

  And then I sat on the back porch and watched the sky.

  Quentin was on the upper deck and yelled down, “See it?”

  “I do. Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god. It’s him, right? That’s a storm, right?”

  Zach rushed out the door, “Katie, the monitor is blowing up.”

  “Oh my god, it’s a freaking storm. Quentin! It’s a storm!”

  Quentin rushed down the stairs, keys in his hand, he bolted to the door.

  My voice following him, “Should I come? I shouldn’t, right? Yes, I should, no, not—”

  But it was too late, he was gone.

  I ran up the stairs to stand on the top deck and watch as the storm furiously billowed farther to the south. The spot where we jumped in and out of the island wasn’t that far away, a mile perhaps, but there were trees covering the area, nothing to see, just—

  I sighed.

  I should have gone with Quentin.

  The storm was gone. I decided to go out and wait on the driveway.

  Fifty-eight - Kaitlyn

  I stood on the driveway for what felt like forever until finally the car was coming.

  It pulled up and into the garage and then—

  “Quentin!!!!! Where’s Magnus?”

  He rolled down the window. “Don’t panic, he’s here, he walked up the beach, because... reasons, he’s probably at the back deck by now.”

  “Really? Shit, you gave me a heart attack.”

  I raced up through the front door and then to everyone in the house, “Oh my god! He’s walking up the beach. I have to pee! I’m so freaking excited I almost peed myself!”

  I rushed into the tiny bath beside the kitchen and peed as fast as I could and rushed out, “Oh my god, I’m totally freaking out. Is he here?”

  Emma smiled her ‘calming’ smile. “No, not yet, deep breath, you look beautiful. Now go on out.”

  I rushed out the door, trying to be calm, and not freaking out. I walked down the length of the boardwalk, long, out over the dunes to where the stair at the end dropped down to the sand.

  I stood at the top, in the light breeze of a hot summer day, and watched, as there down the beach —

  Magnus.

  I waved.

  My breath quickened, but I waited.

  Magnus led a horse, a big beautiful horse, and held a little boy in his arms, Archie —

  His son’s wee arms were around Magnus’s neck, a neck obscured by a long full beard, accentuating the crinkle under his eyes, that meant — I have been gone long, mo reul-iuil, yet now I am home.

  He drew near. “Och,” he said, “look at ye.”

  A tear rolled down my cheek.

  His eyes traveled down my body to my stomach “Kaitlyn... are ye with bairn?”

  “Yes.”

  His hand gripped the rail, warily. “Och, tis a marvel, are ye...? Is the bairn...?”

  “I’m farther along than before, the doctor says we’re both perfect.”

  His eyes got misty. He said, “When I decided tae bring ye the gelding, I forgot tae consider how tae get him home.” He tied the horse’s reins to the rail.

  “You brought him for me?”

  “Aye, his name is Osna. I am glad ye brought our home closer so I dinna have tae walk as far.”

  “Do you like the house?”

  He squinted in the bright sun. “Aye, tis a braw house.”

  He climbed up the stair and rubbed my stomach, the expression on his face one of marveling. “We are having a bairn?”

  “Yes, we are.”

  “Och.” His hand rubbed along my form again, massaging my stomach, feeling it’s roundness.

  I rubbed the back of Archie’s hair. “Hey sweetie, you must be Archie.” He hid his face in his da’s shoulder, still sniffling from the jump. I said, “I’m Kaitlyn, I’m very glad you’re h
ere.”

  Magnus gripped the rail and gingerly lowered himself to his knees, tears glistening on his cheeks. He hugged around my hips with his free arm, holding me close. His forehead pressed against my stomach, he said, “Hello wee bairn, I am Magnus, yer da. I have only just come home, tis why ye haena heard me afore, but I am here now. I promise I am here now and I canna wait tae meet ye.”

  I held my arms around their heads, clutching them closer.

  The three of us.

  Make that four.

  “You’re home.”

  “Aye.”

  “Archie, I barely recognized your da.” He clutched tighter to Magnus’s neck.

  Magnus said, “I am older, not so much in years but the weight of them.”

  I lifted his chin, his forehead gleaming in the hot air, eyes squinting at the brightness. “How long have you been gone?”

  “Almost three years, mo reul-iuil.”

  “Did you finish what you needed to do?”

  “Aye. I have fought a war, vanquished m’enemy, subdued m’mother, and rescued m’son.”

  “You did all of that?”

  “I also brought ye the horse, Osna, he is for an anniversary present.”

  “I love him. He’s perfect.”

  He grinned. “Aye, I think I deserve a special amount of welcomin’. If ye think on it I might deserve the most amount.”

  I smiled down on him and sighed. “God yes, definitely. I can’t wait to welcome you home properly. And, Archie, I’m so glad you’re here. I’m so sorry about how you got here, that feels awful, I know, but through the doors of this house we have cookies waiting for you, and we’re going to make it all better.”

  Archie sniffled and nestled more into his father’s shoulder.

  “You will make it all better, mo ghradh.”

  Magnus rubbed his face on my stomach with a low growl. “Och, ye are broody.” He grinned up at me, clutching my ass in his hand. “Your arse is wide and heavy.”

  “Magnus Campbell, I have barely put on any weight, just enough. My doctor says it’s a perfect amount. I’ll have you know.”

  “Och, tis perfect.” He lumbered up to his feet and hugged me, walking forward, walking me backward, kissing me, loving me, “Tis perfectly braw yer arse, just right for a broodin’ hen.”

  I threw my arms around his neck. “I missed you so much.”

  “I missed ye too.” He picked me up around my waist. “We should be inside m’braw castle.” He carried me and Archie into the house saying, “Tis hot as the underside of a dung heap out here,” and calling up to Quentin, guarding on the upper deck, “Master Quentin, could ye see tae Kaitlyn’s horse?”

  Fifty-nine - Magnus

  My new house was big, far bigger than the one afore. Twas interesting tae have the full memory of a lifetime that Kaitlyn could nae remember, but she had one of me from long ago, Old Magnus, and here I was again, if nae old, at least older and wiser as well.

  I greeted m’family. They hadna seen me for months, for me it had been years.

  I wasna famished, but I had been hungry without Chef Zach’s food and Madame Emma’s attention, Master Quentin’s security and Madame Beaty’s reminiscences of home, and Kaitlyn — her smile, her laugh, and though my arms ached from holding wee Archie, his weight was welcome as well. M’family was growin’ and it was a comfort tae be in the middle of it.

  Kaitlyn hovered around Archie and me. She gave us a tour, she offered him a cookie and sweetly smoothed his hair from his forehead and spoke tae him and opened her heart tae him again and after I had been home for an hour, I asked tae pass him over so I could step from the room, and Archie held his arms out and took tae her lap.

  As I placed him there, I asked, “He is too heavy for ye?”

  “Never, he’s a wee spider monkey, I like the weight of him,” and this was a loop of us, the good kind, the kind that repeats the story and fills in with the details.

  Chef Zach had told me a story once, that the footpaths of auld had worn intae the earth, gone deeper and deeper until they had become a groove, and those grooves had continued on, becomin’ roads and highways, historic paths. I liked tae think we were doin’ that, walkin’ a path taegether, creating a groove in the earth, through time, in our hearts.

  Archie wrapped a hand in Kaitlyn’s hair and put his two middle fingers intae his mouth tae suckle on while he slept and by the time I returned from the bathroom he was nappin’ on her front.

  Her eyes were misty, her smile wide.

  Hayley was there, tae greet me. “Last I saw of you, Mags, was at Balloch,” she said.

  “Aye, and how are ye feelin’ now on Fraoch?”

  “I miss him so much.”

  “Are ye keen tae go?”

  Kaitlyn said, “She made a list of the reasons to do it, and seems pretty set.”

  “Still?”

  Hayley said, “Still. I’m going to take a vacation from work next week. I’ll go for a while, just to see. Katie promised me you wouldn’t mind if I borrow a vessel.”

  “I daena mind.” I put my hand out on Kaitlyn’s rounded form. “I believe I am grounded for a time. I am happy tae be. I am glad ye are capable of going on yer own. Fraoch will be happy tae see ye.”

  “Will he? You’re sure?”

  “Aye, he was yer man, through and through. You just need tae claim him.”

  I raised m’beer. “Tae Mistress Hayley and her future in the eighteenth century with the man, Fraoch, an orphan from the clan MacDonald, formerly scurvy-ridden, with the manners of a pirate, and the scent of roses — the kind of man I call a true friend.”

  Hayley laughed. “Thank you Mags, I’m glad you’re home.”

  “Aye, me as well.”

  Just then there was a movement under my palm.

  Kaitlyn said, “Put your hand here.” She adjusted Archie tae the side so I had more area tae feel. A form within her rolled from one side tae the other. “Och, our bairn.”

  I concentrated on that spot, then folded across her, wrappin’ her in m’arms, Archie and Kaitlyn and the bairn that was comin’, and held her close, forgettin’ we were in the midst of our family.

  I nestled intae the edge of her neck and whispered, “I love ye, mo reul-iuil,” and then I cried, against her skin, in front of my family.

  I dinna ken why. Twas because of the long time away, and the relief tae be home, but also twas like I had been carryin’ the burden of our lives for a long time alone and it had been verra heavy.

  I was nae complainin’, twas necessary, but I had placed the burden now at Kaitlyn’s feet, askin’ her tae help, and she was takin’ it up. She had waited for me with strength, and had embraced Archie, my past, and would help me raise him, without question or judgment, she would open her heart, and now she was bringin’ forth a bairn. She would be the mother she had wanted tae be, and I kent that from now on, as the queen, she would be able tae help me rule, with all that came next.

  I wouldna have tae do it alone. She was here, waiting, and we were ready for what came next.

  Chef Zach grilled steak and potatoes upon an outdoor grill on the back deck of the house.

  Beaty emerged from her guest house with bagpipes. I said, “Madame Beaty, I do verra much admire yer hair.”

  “Ye do?”

  “Aye, it reminds me of home.”

  She grinned, “Balloch?”

  “Nae, Florida.”

  She played us a few songs. The pipes lilting, only sometimes squeakin’ and squawkin’, out over the sand dunes.

  When she finished we cheered and clapped. Archie sat on my lap, watchin’ Ben, ready tae play but bein’ shy on it, not sure he wanted tae be away from me tae do it.

  I said, “Tis alright wee’un, ye will have the morrow,” and it was true.

  Archie fell asleep and I carried him intae the bedroom and put him intae the middle of our bed. Then I returned tae the decks tae talk more with our friends.

  Kailyn said, “I want to hear all of it, all of the
whole three years, but first, how did you get Archie?”

  “It has been verra complicated. Bella was a great vexation. I dinna ken how tae deal with her, but then she solved the dilemma by attemptin’ tae kill me and—”

  They all said, “What?”

  “Aye,” I raised m’shirt tae show them the cut, still fresh but healing. I joked, “Attempted murder of the king was the final straw.”

  Chef Zach said, “I guess so — what the hell? That lady was nothing but trouble.”

  Kaitlyn frowned. “Does that mean she’s in jail forever or worse?”

  “She was, but I dinna want a drawn out trial. I worried on Archie tae have his mother charged with treason. The punishment of the crime is death, I dinna—”

  Kaitlyn said, “I would be worried about that too, my love, that would be tragic.”

  I clasped her hand. “Aye, so Lady Mairead removed her tae another time. She has been left without a vessel.”

  Emma said, “That’s diabolical!”

  “Aye, Lady Mairead is often diabolical. She was also helpful which she rarely is.” I took a swig of a beer. “Bella winna be botherin’ us again. Roderick, though, is still unaccounted for. He has been beaten, but is in hidin’, and daena have any vessels. I daena think he can cause trouble.”

  Quentin said, “Good, perfect.”

  Kaitlyn asked, “So Bella isn’t coming back for Archie?”

  “Nae, mo reul-iuil. She dinna like him much anyway.”

  “That’s awful. She’s so freaking mean, I hate her mean bitch-face so much. We really never have to deal with her again?”

  “Without a vessel she inna much more than a terrible memory.”

  “There is so much good news, I mean, except for the whole three years worth of war.”

  I said, “We are rebuildin’ the Caisteal Morag now, and Hammie is helpin’ tae run the government. I am tryin’ tae improve the kingdom.”

  “And Lady Mairead is helping you?”

  “Aye, she is in her element, runnin’ meetings, negotiatin’ treaties, lordin’ over all the men. I gave her a dagger. She wears it every day and takes it out sometimes just tae hold while she makes commands. She is verra contented.”