Natasha's Diary

by Heather Greenis

  “Hope Donovan. Don’t,” he warned. “We’re to be married. Our wedding night should be memorable, not tarnished with regret for our rash actions this night.”

  She pulled her suit down a little further.

  “Hope, your father is in that house.”

  She giggled. Adam sounded desperate. “He won’t see us,” she assured him.

  “He’ll lose respect for me.”

  “That will never happen,” she replied, eager to be with him. “Momma was carrying me on the day they wed. He doesn’t have the right to condemn us. We are engaged, with a date set. Please.”

  Pulling her suit down a little further, a small portion of her breast gleamed in the moonlight.

  “I beg of you. Stop. Please. We mustn’t until we’re married.”

  Holding Adam’s gaze, she stood and reached for his hand. An expression of relief suffused his face. Adam pushed himself to his feet, and then reached for their towels, apparently preparing to return to the house. When he turned to take her hand, Hope pulled her bathing suit top down to her waist. Adam clenched his eyes shut. His Adam’s apple bobbed. She heard him swallow.

  “I shall surely die of disgrace if your father were to witness this. My own father will have my hide for showing you such disrespect.”

  You would die? You have no idea how difficult this is for me. We will not be seen, and I will lie with you this night. Hope reached for his hands, placed the tips of his fingers on her collarbone, and guided his hands lower to her exposed flesh. She closed her eyes. Breathe. His fingers touched her. Breathe. Adam’s free hand gripped the back of her neck and pulled her face toward his. His tongue entered her mouth, his lips crushing hers.

  The amazing kiss left her hungry for more. Her body craved his touch. Her free hand slid down his side until she felt the cloth of his swimwear. She manoeuvred her thumbs inside and pulled the material down his thighs. Adam never spoke but pulled back from the kiss and kicked off the shorts. Standing completely nude in the moonlight, the only movement was the trembling of his body. He never uttered a sound, never moved. Hope pushed her attire down to her feet and stepped out of it. She lowered herself onto the grass and extended her hands to him. He joined her silently, wrapped his arms under her shoulders, and cushioned her head with his hands. He kissed her again, and then abruptly pushed his upper body off hers. She stared at his chest as it rose and fell rapidly, his breathing harsh in the still night.

  “Hope, we can’t do this. There are consequences. You could conceive a child.”

  “Yes,” she agreed calmly. “We could become parents. I want a family. If you’re not willing to father my children I cannot marry you. I love you, why should we wait for some ink on a paper to dry?”

  “Hope,” he began in angry desperation. “I love you.”

  “Then love me,” she begged.

  She sucked in a painful breath at the pinching sensation as he entered her. Momma wrote of the initial pain of marital relations in her diary, so Hope wasn’t totally unprepared. However, reading about it and experiencing it were two entirely different things. Relax. I want this to be pleasurable as well as memorable. With a wave of emotion and ecstasy she thought she would explode. Oh, if only she could stop time and stay in this moment of bliss forever.

  Exhausted when they finished, she opened her eyes and looked at Adam. He opened his eyes and smiled. With her body tight against his, he rolled onto his back. Even with the heat from Adam’s body, the air chilled her bare back. She shivered. Reaching for the towel, she pulled it over her.

  “You’re cold, yet I am burning with heat,” Adam observed.

  “I do find myself chilled.”

  “I love you. I wish we could lie like this forever, but I must return home.”

  After lying with Adam, Hope could not bear the thought of sleeping alone. She wanted to fall asleep with Adam’s arms around her and wake up to his beautiful smile.

  “Spend the night with me,” she pleaded. “Hold me and fall asleep by my side.”

  “Your family is in the house. I cannot.”

  “The hour is late. Poppa will be sleeping. I beg of you, stay with me. If we rise early, you can leave before anyone stirs. Our families will not have reason for suspicion.”

  With their bathing attire in their hands, they wrapped themselves in the large towels and returned to the house.

  Chapter Forty-Eight

  Exhausted, Stewart stretched and struggled to open his eyes. Izabella moaned in protest beside him.

  “I must dress and return home,” she muttered.

  “Nay. Spend the remainder of the night in my arms.”

  Her breathing settled and her body grew heavy with sleep. He closed his eyes but with his mouth so dry he could barely swallow, and he couldn’t get to sleep. He crawled out of bed and pulled his night attire over his head. With the oil lamp lit, he opened the door to the hallway. He almost tripped over Brodie. You’re not in Hope’s room? Looking across the hall, his daughter’s door was still open. Is it possible they are still swimming? It is a beautiful night, but Adam will regret his decision in the morning.

  He worked his way down the staircase and slowly shuffled his way toward the kitchen. Stewart leaned on the counter while he drank. Movement outside startled him. A wild creature? It sounds close, just outside the door. Concerned for Hope and Adam, he turned to look out the window. The door opened. Hope and Adam entered the kitchen, wrapped in towels. Brodie charged into the room, greeting the young couple with sniffs. Hope never spoke to acknowledge Stewart. Adam’s gaze seemed riveted to the floor. Even with the dim lighting from the single oil lamp, it was obvious both were naked. There could be no mistake—the bathing costume clutched in Hope’s hand left no room for doubt.

  Stewart’s heart sank. Sensing the sudden tension, Brodie sat between Hope and Stewart, shifting her attention between the two. He stared at his daughter in silence. Hope’s hair was messy and too dry for her to have just come out of the pond. Hope remained silent. Stewart’s initial reaction was anger. There was no excuse for this occurring before their wedding night. A vision of Natasha entered his mind. A pregnant Natasha. A grim smile twisted his lips at the thought. Hope was conceived before they were married. Natasha’s pregnancy forced her to agree to marry him. That evening gave him his one and only child with the woman he loved. He had no regrets. Looking at his daughter, other than embarrassment, he did not see regret in her expression. On the contrary, my daughter is glowing. He could not recall seeing her as happy since the day Adam put the ring on her finger. Hope was her mother’s daughter. Adam would have had little choice in the matter. He unclenched his hands and relaxed.

  If Hope had conceived by the pond, like he and Natasha in his dorm room, they would become parents. They were young, in love, and committed to a future together. Keep your opinions to yourself. Given the late hour, Adam should be rushing to change and return home. But here he stands. I don’t believe this evening is over for Hope and Adam. “I trust you’re capable of finding your way home. Goodnight, Adam. Goodnight, Hope.”

  He turned and walked toward the stairs. There was no movement behind him. He reached the top of the staircase and turned his head slightly. No sign of Hope or Adam. He opened his bedroom door and closed it behind him. Don’t knock, wishing to enter and talk, Hope, Stewart prayed, not wanting her to enter and see Izabella in his bed.

  Izabella woke as the door clicked shut. Attempting to open her eyes, she squinted against the light. Stewart took another sip from the glass he brought from the kitchen and placed it on Izabella’s side of the bed before returning to his own. He extinguished the lamp, crawled in beside her, kissed the back of her neck, and slid his arms about her.

  “I must have drifted off to sleep.”

  “I’m surprised you woke.”

  “You left the room?”

  “I was thirsty and couldn’t sleep without a drink. I brought some up for you as well.”

  Izabella sat up and took a drink.

 
; “Adam and Hope were just coming in from the pond.”

  Izabella looked out the window, and then placed the glass back onto the table. She snuggled her back into his chest. “At this hour?”

  “Indeed.” He grimaced. “I believe my little girl just became a woman. I have mixed emotions about that. How can I disapprove of such an action when Hope is aware I impregnated Natasha before we were engaged? Hope is aware I harbour no personal regrets regarding that. If I were able to step back in time, nothing would change. We would still have a daughter.”

  “I cannot imagine the words that must have come from her blunt father’s mouth. Whatever did you say to them?”

  Stewart muffled his laugh, fearing Hope would hear him. He didn’t want her to find Izabella in his bed.

  “My dearest Izabella, have you no faith in me? I didn’t say anything. I don’t recall another time when Hope would not speak or look at me. Tomorrow shall be interesting to say the least.”

  “I’m proud of you, Poppa. That must have been difficult.”

  Stewart questioned whether she was joking or serious. Izabella was very good at keeping him guessing. He propped himself up on an elbow to see her face. He hoped to see some sign she was teasing. He didn’t. “I may be blunt, but I possess a certain degree of tact,” he remarked, defending his actions.

  Izabella reached for his hand where it rested by her chest and kissed it. “Did you assist him with the horse and buggy?”

  “I would have offered, but Adam never left Hope’s side. I don’t believe Adam is planning to return home this evening. I fear Hope is planning to share her bed with her fiancé.”

  “Oh. I hope we do not see each other as we leave before sunrise.”

  This was his house, and he had no intention of sneaking Izabella out of his home. Vicki and Greg would be pleased at this development, he mused. Stewart rolled Izabella onto her back. “Adam may be leaving before dawn, but you are not. I require some sleep to revive my old bones, but, with your permission, I plan to repeat our recent activities before we rise from this bed.”

  “Permission granted.” She smiled and rolled onto her side with her back to him.

  He kissed the back of her head and fell into a deep sleep with Izabella in his arms.

  * * *

  Keeghan gasped and shook her head. “Oh my God. I feel like peeping toms. Two couples, two sex scenes. I guess I should be grateful we didn’t see the actual event. We didn’t even see actual nudity. PG 13 rating.”

  “Not into that, huh?” Will teased, chuckling.

  “No. There is a reason we don’t have mirrors all around our bedroom. I want to experience the sensations, not watch them. I’m glad Stewart didn’t lecture Hope. She would have lost respect for her dad. Nothing worse than ‘do as I say, not as I do.’ The question is, will this night be discussed?”

  “Do you think Adam will stay or go home?”

  "Both Hope and Adam just lost their virginity. They’re in love and content in every way possible. She won’t let him go. No question, he’ll be spending the night with her.”

  Alexander cleared his throat and pointed at the scene.

  Chapter Forty-Nine

  When Poppa left the room, Hope locked the door, and reached for Adam’s hand. She led him up to the second floor with Brodie following close behind. After retrieving Adam’s clothes from the spare room, she guided her fiancé to her bedroom.

  “You must remain in the hallway, Brodie. Be a good girl and go to sleep.” Hope closed the door on the dog.

  “Our timing couldn’t have been worse,” Adam admitted as he stared at the floor. “Your poppa must have suspicions. Are you certain you wish me to stay?”

  “Indeed, I’m positive,” Hope assured him.

  “I can’t sleep in my swim attire, and I have nothing suitable with me.”

  “Knock on Poppa’s door and request something to sleep in then.” Hope giggled.

  “I’m discovering your wit becomes sharper when you’re tired.” He removed the towel and crawled into bed naked. Hope allowed her towel to drop and joined him.

  “I’m shocked. You sleep in the nude?”

  “Never,” she admitted firmly. “This will be a night of firsts.” She rolled on top of him.

  “You said you only wanted me to hold you,” Adam protested. “What if someone hears?”

  “No one will bother us, and I shall fall asleep in your arms afterward.”

  “How shall we survive until the wedding?”

  “We shall have some late evenings at the pond.”

  “I love you, Hope Donovan.” Adam put his arms around her and flipped her onto her back.

  Hope woke as Adam removed his arm. Having only slept a couple hours, she was pleasantly exhausted.

  “My apologies. I didn’t mean to wake you. I must return home and change before my parents rise.” He yawned.

  Hope yawned, crawled out of bed, pulled her dressing gown over her head, and grabbed her shawl. She followed Adam down the stairs and gave him a quick kiss goodbye.

  After watching him prepare the horse and buggy, she waved goodbye. Hope locked the front door and returned to her bed. She allowed Brodie in the room, and closed her door for the remainder of the night.

  * * *

  “I don’t know about the guys, but I wasn’t going for round two after losing my virginity. My boyfriend was gentle, but I was still a bit tender. I’m certain I was walking a bit funny the next day,” Keeghan admitted.

  Will nodded. “If it makes you feel any better, I was a bit tender after mine too. Next day I was good to go.”

  Keeghan raised her eyebrows. “And good to go ever since.”

  Chapter Fifty

  Hearing movement in the hall, Stewart opened his eyes and looked out the window. The sky was still illuminated by the bright moon and twinkling stars. Is Adam leaving? He closed his eyes and drifted back to sleep.

  The birds were chirping and the sun beginning to rise when he woke again. Izabella was sleeping soundly with her back snuggled into his chest. Lifting his head, he watched her for a few minutes. Surprised she didn’t stir, he kissed the side of her neck. She never moved. He continued kissing her neck until she began to twitch.

  “Good morning,” he murmured against her skin.

  “I require more sleep—” she groaned.

  “There is no need to wake.” But I don’t plan to stop. I’m awake with no desire to leave this bed. He continued caressing her neck. She squirmed. “I’m rusty, but…,” Stewart whispered, repeating her phrase from the previous night.

  “Love me,” she pleaded.

  I’d be delighted to. He slowly moved his caresses down her shoulder blade. She attempted to roll onto her back. Anticipating her reaction, he gave her a gentle push. Izabella flopped onto her stomach. Straddling her thighs, he trailed his lips down her back. Grabbing the sheet, he pulled it over his head, covering her shoulders.

  He continued caressing her under the sheets. Izabella attempted to roll over, but he held her steady. A soft moan escaped her lips. His kisses reached the small of her back. Izabella giggled. What is so funny? He lifted his head. “Laughing is not to occur during seduction. It destroys the mood.”

  “Then you must avoid tickling.”

  Tickling? Am I rusty, or is that just a sensitive area? Ticklish, hmm. I shall have fun with that, in the future. “Mental note, do not kiss the small of her back. It is far too sensitive.”

  “My apologies, but you must put me out of my agony and finish what you have started.”

  Smiling, he ducked under the covers. Within seconds she was moaning and writhing again.

  “Please,” she begged.

  Allowing Izabella to roll onto her back, Stewart quickly repositioned himself to kiss her thigh.

  “No. Now.”

  She grabbed him by the shoulders and pulled him toward her. He slid inside her in one fluid motion and claimed her lips in his. Her tongue withdrew from within his mouth. She uttered a muffled squeal. He gr
inned with satisfaction. “I love you.”

  “Don’t stop.” She let out another moan.

  He questioned her meaning. Don’t stop loving me. Don’t stop kissing me. It didn’t matter. He loved her, and she loved him. The heady experiences of the previous night and this morning had been worth the wait, and he was far from done. “Never.”

  “I was concerned you would be tired after last evening,” she stammered, struggling to breathe as they finished. “I’ll be humiliated if Hope heard us or if Vicki and Greg did.”

  Stewart kissed her forehead, and Izabella rolled onto her side. He pulled her back tight against his chest.

  “Hope is a sound sleeper,” he assured her. “My sister and brother-in-law don’t concern me.”

  He kissed the back of her head and closed his eyes. He fell into a deep sleep.

  Stewart woke a short time later and gazed at Izabella’s reflection in the mirror. Izabella opened her eyes.

  “Good morning,” she greeted, smiling at his reflection in the mirror.

  “Indeed it is,” he agreed.

  Izabella crawled out of bed, reached for her clothing, and began dressing. “I shall walk down the steps and straight out the door.”

  “And miss breakfast?” he inquired. He relaxed on his pillow, his eyes following her movements. “Being the host to an overnight guest, I do plan to feed you.”

  “Stewart. I must leave in haste. I never arrive this early.”

  “You arrived yesterday, and you are still here. It is my hope you will agree to share my bed again,” he remarked.

  She smiled as she ran her fingers through her hair, attempting to make it presentable. Not concerned with her appearance, or his own, Stewart crawled out of bed and dressed.