"We can finish here and return to Falcon as soon as possible."
Time. If only Falcon has enough time. Why does time always seem to slow when I have a problem? But I'd have to hope time worked on my side. That I could see my sire safe. And that I can be thankful I can focus on Willow now.
****
Alone after nightfall, I rolled back and forth in my blankets trying not to think about anything associated with him. His attentive lips. His possessive growl. Those muscles that seemed to hold me in place but make me feel like I am the most treasured thing on Earth. But where had Boa run off to? Not here. Not to my bed to wait for me. His beloved. Right. I'm his bitch. I gulped down a lump of pride and tossed away from the dark wall to face the dying fire in the hearth.
Is this what love is like, AEI? As messed up as my relationship? Gods, to think my life would be different if I'd been born in a different decade. One long before the off-world invasion. I wouldn't have met Boa though. Probably wouldn't live in the woods. Would hate the fact I couldn't roam through forest and meadow. Would I even like nature? How does a person even begin to digest the thought of no singing Western Meadowlarks while collecting wild onion in summer? I tossed back to face the unrelenting wall a mere three inches away.
Hideous cruel stifling wall.
Mating is best left for birds and bees. Not thoughtful girls who are better off left to exploring and thinking. Not time wasted on finding a mate! So much for my foolhardy endeavor. I should have known I'd be toyed with. Deflowered. Insulted. Ashamed.
Love. It isn't worth the orgasms. Love is downright painful. I threw myself onto my back and stared at the deep void of shadows cloaking the rafters overhead.
That's what love is. Lost in something that is really something else like what looms overhead as the protective the ceiling. The harsh linear skeleton of the rafters is what holds the lodge together, supporting, functional in a biological and physical way mating unites a couple. Whereas the inky black impenetrable shadows, both dark and dangerous, ebb and flow while concealing life's true purpose, conceals the truth that love is just a fairytale. A joke. Because love is equally dark and dangerous as the ephemeral murky fuzz of shadow glossing over the reality that neither man nor woman can procreate without mating… Gods, I'll be up all night bashing my skull against such cruel thoughts. I rolled onto my stomach and planted my nose into the soft cattail down of the encampment's pillow.
One thing is for certain, staying as far away from Boa as possible is the only way to maintain my sanity. Or I'd never rise from the suffocating shadows of love to find my way back home. And that's exactly what I need. To go home.
****
"What in the Gods-be-damned hell have you done?" Croc growled.
The lodge shaked around me in the darkness.
Or Croc had a grip on my shoulders.
Not a good dream.
A squeak noted the bed supported my back.
Bed. I'm warm. Under the comforting blanket. With my sire manhandling my shoulders. Asleep. I popped my eyes open.
The yellow circle beard ringed Croc's u-shaped scowl like a twisted bull's-eye.
A really bad omen. "What happened?" I demanded.
His lips curled back into a menacing snarl of sparkling teeth. "You reek of pregnancy."
No. Fucking. Way. "You're insane." I tried to shove his iron arms from my shoulders.
His thumbs dug in beneath my clavicle, pinning my body against the unyielding bedding. "A Wolf's nose doesn't lie," he hissed.
Holy shit. I had to get out of here. "Let me go."
He lifted me by that death grip, pinching me under my armpits, and stood me on my bare feet.
The cool hard-packed earthen lodge floor was anything but supportive as my sire's trembling grip held me, slowly stalking forward, walking me backward until the solid merciless wall prevented me another fraction of room for further retreat.
"You will not lie to me, Willow," he thundered. "Tell me the bastard's name. I will make him make an honest mate of you."
No. It's bad enough I fell for a Bitterroot Shifter and carry his growing seed. But wanting to mate Boa too? My sire would probably enjoy taunting me for the rest of my life the way he toyed with me now as punishment.
"I will know now," Croc growled, lowering his scowl until the tip of his broad nose was but a hair's width from mine.
How to get out of this? Lie. There are lots of Normals around here. "A Normal."
"What filthy bastard of a Normal got you pregnant then tucked tail and ran?"
Not a sweet angle to bounce back from. "He's married." I genuinely grimaced from the not-so-perfect response. But a girl has to do what a girl has to do.
"No fucking way. Not with my daughter." He shoved me toward the door. "We'll find out what the outpost thinks.
My heart sank.
Wise organ, running for cover. A public announcement is the worst possible next step. And if Boa's lurking, he'll witness the success of his plan.
Barefoot. I can't high tail it out of Croc's range without my boots. I planted my heels in the ground. "I'm not going anywhere without my boots." A good reason to delay.
His palms shoved me in the back toward the door.
Not too hard. But with enough force to make me lose my footing. "Gods-damn you, Croc." I whirled to face my father's glower. "I need my fucking boots."
He just glared.
For some reason, he allowed me the time I needed to tie each one's laces into place. At least I still wore a t-shirt and my jeans. Only fools didn't sleep in their clothes AEI. Just in case.
"Who, Willow? You will tell me his name." Father hovered two steps away.
The indomitable asshole, flicking his thick gargantuan invisible reptilian tail. What a disposition. How did I not turn out the spitting image of him? "I told you he's married. He won't admit to any of this." I unfolded to mirror his demanding stance. "So stop asking."
He grabbed my elbow and dragged me out the doorway into the strengthening white light of dawn, that pinch of his grasp on my arm pulling me past door after door of the Shifter's lodges, then kicked in the door to Tornado's meeting lodge. "Tornado," Croc howled.
Not a moment passed before the large hulking Shifter emerged barefoot from the far doorway in faded camouflage pants of green hues. "What?" he snarled.
His recalcitrant tone showed Tornado wasn't happy with being summoned to work so early. Good. Maybe he'll save me from my sire. Surely someone will.
"One of your Normals knocked up my daughter."
Tornado's casual gaze settled onto mine with a finesse only a Shifter could manage.
Did Ginny tell him know about Boa and I? Will he rat me out to my sire?
"Tell us his name, Willow." Tornado stared at me with the patience of a dozen sires.
As if he meant to play dumb. Maybe he doesn't know. Or he's going to help me. I lifted my chin. "I won't. And it wouldn't matter. He's mated."
Croc wrenched my elbow high, forcing me to turn toward his scowl. "Yes, tell everyone you're a whore. Stupid mindless girl. And I thought you the savviest of the lot of my pups," he hissed.
Like a snake. The snake that had had his way with me. And any moment, said snake would slither through the door to learn he was a sire because of this fiasco of Croc's temper. Just what would Boa do then? Dear. Gods. Rejoice? Rub it in? Hopefully play along. Then we could both go our separate ways. Return home to eke out normal lives. Boa would probably disappear. Leave me to raise his child. Please, universe. Gift me that one thing.
Croc yanked on my arm. "Answer us!"
"That isn't the way to treat a female, Croc," Tornado barked. "Let her go before I flay your hide."
Not a fight too. I bounced a warning stare between both of them. "Look, both of you just calm down. I have enough problems without two Elders ripping each other's heads off. What would that do for me? Then the locals will really talk about me."
Tornado blinked extremely slowly while facing Croc down with his challenge.
Would Croc back down?
My father whirled on his heel, releasing me, and slammed through the doorway, leaving the door flapping at us.
"He'll settle down," Tornado said softly.
Really? I slid my gaze to him. "You sound pretty certain of that."
"His clan will suffer until he learns to let the past go."
Tornado was the kind of handsome that drew women's stares. But something changed in his face. Maybe some shadow danced across his tanned skin. Maybe he spoke from experience. A thing someone in my position desperately needed in this type of situation. "Alright. I'll trust you."
"Does the lucky man know?" He didn't move.
Didn't back or turn away. I was trapped beneath his unyielding scrutiny. What can I say? Just confess about Boa? Would that get Ginny into trouble? And even if you could call Boa's use of me as revenge an engagement, I'd rather not discuss my naiveté here and now.
A gun fired beyond the lodge's wall.
Too bloody close.
Another shot boomed.
"What in the Gods-be-damned--" Tornado abandoned his other words and yanked the door wide. "It's your fucking sire." My savior vanished into sunlight.
What now? I'd better catch up with Tornado before somebody got flayed. Pay attention. Come up with some kind of plan while they battled with words. Words that would lead to a plan for me. I opened the door to warm sunlight.
And Father had shocked every sleepy village soul from its bed with his armed antics.
Tornado quickly approached my sire. "Put your weapon away, Croc."
Lovely. A fight was brewing. I'd rather eat breakfast.
Father glared at Tornado. "Not until the mated Normal worm who rolled my daughter gets his ass out here in front of the townsfolk to admit he knocked her up."
Not the choicest of words to urge cooperation.
Tornado's brisk pace never wavered. The crowd parted at his approach. His footfalls clipped right up to Croc where they stood eye to eye. And Tornado pounded Croc's face with a right hook.
Father teetered but caught his balance. "You fucking bastard." Blood trickled from one of his nostrils but didn't detract from the shocked mask he wore. "What in the hell do you think you're doing?"
Well, by the way these educated adults are throwing the word fucking around, I'd be better off leaving to find seek refuge with breakfast to forget about my plight and get my thoughts straight.
The alphas stared each other down.
"Ending this before it gets ugly," Tornado growled.
"You're too late." Croc scanned the mushrooming crowd. "Who in the hell fucked my daughter?"
Tornado shifted so quickly I barely saw what unfolded. The biggest blackest werewolf I'd ever seen leapt at Croc who shifted as well. Before I could take a step to break up the mayhem, both werewolves clamped a part of each other in their jaws. Still dangerously attached. Bad. I have to get out of here before things worsen. I stretched my stride into a brisk pace and skirted the two snarling weres, searching the unyielding palisade's columns of tree trunks for an avenue of escape.
Without any supplies, I'd have to return by nightfall.
A red mare with two white socks stood saddled, ready to go with what appeared to be a standard stash pack--trail food, bullets, knife, matches, and some kind of firearm. If I took her, got the heck out of here, I could stay away a few days until I ran out of dry goods or bullets. Long enough to let Croc settle down and Boa return home to his sire's lodge. Without me. Perfect plan.
Nobody noticed that I climbed into the comforting saddle and hustled my enthusiastic mount toward the open gateway.
In my boots. It pays to recall those little points uttered like never step outside without your boots!
****
The sunset in a reddening sky to Boa's right after a long day in the forest hunting was an omen for what was yet to come. Red for passion or flowing blood, he noted the irony. Whatever the reason and outcome, I'd confront Willow.
Oh to have my mate in my bed again tonight. Is that too much to ask?
Where's mine? Wolf whimpered.
Red stumbled but caught his footing.
Truly a blessing because the hard saddle had a way of grinding a Wolf's thoughts into nonexistence. I patted the horse's sweaty neck.
The same damned itch that had bothered me for the last hour annoying nagged at my left shoulder blade. I shouldn't have worn the camouflage stripes. Grant it, the sportsmanship in hunting with nothing more than Normal weapons made it more sporting to show up my alpha skills to my younger brother. Grant it, riding all day with Fox and Scorpion had many perks. The two of them could chat about potential mates, weapons, or plan something for tomorrow, and I could hash through what to say to Willow. She'd obviously returned my necklace to indicate she was finished with me. Why?
Had I scared her away in my were-form? Impossible. Look what she lived with. The most volatile Shifting clan on the continent. Something else lay behind her actions. Maybe her behavior reflected her sire's attitude. Maybe the rift between our clans just proved too much for her. But it's too late for Wolf. I have to win her back.
There goes the accursed itch again. I scratched the irritation into oblivion for the moment.
It wasn't as easy to dispel the confusion and questions about my mate. Maybe she set a trap for me. Maybe I wasn't seducing her. She seduced me. After all, she is the beauty. She could lead any a Shifter into a snare. I needed to be rational. Watch. Figure out what is really taking place.
Death Summit's broad gaping gateway welcomed in the distance.
Maybe the Normal on the scaffolding wielding his M-16 isn't welcoming. But who expects an outpost to greet you warmly at the door? But no Willow. Yes. She's angry. I'll find her and we'll talk, or I'll resign myself to the fact she hurt me for Croc. That would be a twisted joke of fate. My sire dies while I track female tail instead of heading back home to talk to him before he's gone. Or before the healer has a chance to cure him.
Tornado's form suddenly loomed beyond the gateway. "We need to talk."
The clan leader's pinched eyes and insistent stare meant now. "Alright." I slid from the saddle and handed the reins over to my younger brother, Fox, who led the horse away without a word.
Alone with Tornado, I followed him.
The Elder quietly walked to his meeting lodge, kicking up a draft to set the hearth's flames on a wild jig, and shut his private lodge's door tight at my heels.
Alone. We're alone with the deepening shadows of dusk. Why?
"There was an incident this morning," Tornado said softly.
Begrudgingly. I waited for his gaze to lock onto mine while he stared at the hard-packed earthen floor as if the planet would somehow make his revelation easier for him. "What?" Then, I got the gaze. That look of you don't want to know.
"Croc's Wolf smelled the scent on her."
Hell. Didn't she have enough sense to bathe before returning to her lodge?
"Boa, she's pregnant."
Wolf rammed into my throat.
Choking. Clawing at my chest. Shoving out. Ready to find his mate. "What happened?" I somehow managed to utter while holding my footing that my Wolf insisted on moving.
"I tried to intervene. To prevent what happened. But--"
Protect mine. Wolf unfurled a growl like nothing I'd never heard.
I jumped toward the door.
Tornado's large hulking mass of muscle fell against the wood. "Hear me out."
What did Croc do? "If he hurt one hair on her head--"
Kill, Wolf growled.
"Not one." Tornado stared me down with the indomitable gaze of a Shifter who insisted on being in control. "She ran off while her sire and I vented his anger in our Wolfskins. She's gone, Boa. And, it's almost dusk."
Protect, Wolf snarled.
The fucking alien monster patrol was about to emerge with the night to eat human flesh. "How in the Gods-be-damned universe can you stand there while my pregnant mate is running throu
gh The Wild when Bounders are about to hunt down those not secured behind heavy fortification?"
"She took a mare with a stash bag. You know as well as I that a Shifter's daughter can take care of herself. So, calm down. You've got to be in the right frame of mind when you go looking for her. You've got to control the Wolf and your fear of loss."
Or she'll hide from me. From everyone searching for her. And Willow can hide. I stepped backward away from the sheer power of Tornado's presence, sucking down a calming breath.
"You need to know what happened."
True. "Okay. What did Croc say?"
"Called her out. Demanded to know the identity of the man who impregnated her."
So Croc knows it was me.
"She said he was a married Normal." Tornado's steady gaze dared me to speak.
Why did she lie? My glare had to sour into a mask of rage.
"She protected you, Boa."
Find, Wolf begged with a whine. Protect mine.
Find her. Oh yes. I'd find her. Make her talk to me. Return home with me. I'd take her home. Make a home with her. And do whatever necessary to clear up the confusion between us.
****
Two days passed before I began to think my woods-girl skills were better than a Shifter's Wolf senses because I had ditched the red mare the first day while crossing a stream, then headed upstream in the cold-ass water to tote my stash bag with me to this lovely small cave. It's really good that I lacked super-human Shifter senses with all the scat in this hole. The stink alone from the latest occupant's well-used grass bedding implied a litter of something had recently been tucked away here. But I'm not about to hide in broad daylight to avoid the miserable stench.
Nobody will find me. So true. So true.
And when they'd all headed back to their outposts, I'd return to Death Summit and make Tornado give me a horse so I could head somewhere. To a place nobody will care about my child. A place where I can have a baby and a chance to find a mate. A Shifter who doesn't mind my sire was a legendary hot head. Yes, Tornado will fix the mess he made of my life after using his wife's death to screw up everything I could remotely have called favorable. Before he kicked me out of his village because I'd never scrub this stink off. Gods, I can't live like this much longer. At least the Bounders can't smell me out here with my scent masked by animal filth. Just to go back…
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