Too Haught

by Leela Lou Dahlin

  Chapter 10

  Karessa

  Karessa was in no mood to party, but she knew how to put on a happy face and fake it. She tried to ignore the fact that she felt like shit and didn’t want to waste any time away from Beau, but that is exactly why she should have been happy when True had announced the new plans for the evening. She knew it was because of her. The woman had taken one look at her when she returned from her little jaunt with Beau and had scrambled making calls. She got this little party bus together in an amazingly short amount of time. Party planners would envy her connections.

  She had been sitting on the bus with the other ladies while True went back into her studio. It seemed like she’d been in there forever, but then there she was…ready to go. Beau had been standing at the door looking at the bus. She should have been used to his gorgeousness already, but she wasn’t. She thought she’d missed him and was over it, but seeing him again, kissing him again, and just being near him told her that she’d been lying to herself.

  True sat across from her and had a smile on her face, but it looked forced.

  “What did Beau say?” Karessa wanted to slap her hand over her mouth. That is so not what she wanted to say. There was something about being home that just made her revert to how she was when she lived here. Heaven knew she wished it weren’t true, but the proof was undeniable.

  “We talked about a lot of things, but mostly I told him not to make a situation where you felt uncomfortable coming back. That is my worst fear. I’m so glad you’re here, and I would enjoy seeing more of you.” True’s face told the story and Karessa instantly felt like a heel for staying away for so long.

  “In the beginning, I was hurt. I wanted to hurt Beau for not wanting me, but then when I got busy I didn’t want to come back for all sorts of other reasons. I’ve missed you too, True, and I’ll be back more often.” There was party music playing softly, but for the most part, people were just listening to their conversation.

  “Well, let’s turn up the music and get the drinks flowing. This is supposed to be a party for Gemmi and the wedding the whole town is happy and shocked to witness.” True turned her attention to her coworker and friend, so Karessa did too. The woman was quite lovely, but looked like she was fighting with saying something to Karessa. It had been like this since the two of them had met, but as usual, when Beau was around it was easy to push other things to the side.

  “Are you excited for your big day?” Karessa asked Gemmi and was rewarded with a sweet smile.

  “I’m excited and nervous. There are going to be so many people there, but I have True, my cousin Rosalyn, and you there, so I’ll be fine. Camden wanted to get married at the Justice of the Peace and have a reception, but I wanted to do this traditionally.” Gemmi spoke quickly and waved her hands around when she talked.

  “I’m sure it’s going to be perfect.”

  “I have been wanting to say something to you, though.” Gemmi took a gulp of whatever she had in her glass, trying to overcome her shyness. “If you wanted to be in the wedding, I’ve made arrangement for you to get a dress quickly. I’d love to have you be a part of the wedding party.”

  “Ohhh…you don’t have to do that. I wouldn’t want to put you out like that. I’m fine being in the audience.” Karessa was so touched by that she couldn’t help the tears that had sprung to her eyes. “That is so sweet of you to offer.”

  “It wouldn’t be any trouble, and I’m going to insist since you look like you really like the idea. I can’t believe that we now have our own line of Karessables, and The Karessa Monroe is going to be in our wedding.” Gemmi bounced up and down. “We can move this party to the tailor’s place. I’ve told her that she is to be ready if I could get you to agree with this, and now we have less than 36 hours until the wedding.”

  “I’ll do it only if you agree to let me pay for my dress and anything else that’s required for me to be in the wedding. It’s probably going to be extremely expensive and it will truly be my pleasure to stand up for you.” Now that Karessa had agreed to be in the wedding, she was extremely excited about it. She’d never been in a wedding before. She didn’t have that many close friends and the ones she did have, Maryse and True, were single. The drink she had in her hand seemed to be refilling itself, and she was pleasantly warm and increasingly giddy.

  “Not a chance. I’ve been crossing my fingers and toes hoping you’d say yes, and now that you have, it would be an honor to pay for it, but if it’s a contingency that you pay. I’m alright with that.”

  Karessa was glad the bride wasn’t going to argue this because she knew it would be a hassle for whoever made this dress and she wanted to make sure the woman was compensated for her time. The dress and the request for her to be in the wedding had touched her in a way that surprised her. Feeling so included by people she practically threw away made her so thankful for her friends. For now she could only nod and smile, because if she tried to say anything else the tears that she could feel welling up in her soul would escape through her eyes and ain’t nobody got time for that.

  ***

  Several hours and many drinks later, she remembered why she didn’t like alcohol that much. It made her extremely horny, and although she knew she probably had a willing partner, she knew she shouldn’t seek Beau out, but she couldn’t remember why.

  “Are you sure you want to go back to Beau’s? You could stay with us for the night. It’s late and—” True was cut off when Karessa raised her hand.

  “I just want to talk to him. That’s all.” Her voice was a little slurred, and it made her giggle.

  One of the women she didn’t know very well called out from the back part of the bus. “There are lots of people who just want to talk to him.”

  That started them all laughing, and it continued until they pulled up to Beau’s condo.

  “Do you want me to walk you up?” True asked, trying to sound like she wasn’t as drunk as everyone else on the bus.

  “I’m sure I can make it.” Karessa stood up and noticed that she was a bit wobbly, so she sat back down and closed her eyes until the bus made a complete stop. The oohs and ahhs she heard as the bus stopped made her want to see what people were looking at, but she was afraid if she turned around too quickly she’d see the snacks and drinks make a grand reappearance.

  “Have a good night, Karessa,” a few women said as she walked off the bus. It was hard to concentrate on just taking the next step. What the hell kind of drinks had she been drinking? It seemed like it caught up with her right now. She wasn’t quite sure how she was going to make it to the apartment, but she knew that she’d do it. An independent woman like her made things work…that’s what she’d tell herself as she crawled away when the bus left.

  “Thanks for including me in your fun. You ladies are a hoot.” She turned around when the doors opened and found out what the oohs and ahhs were about.

  “Did you ladies have a good night?” Beau’s deep voice was sexier than she remembered, and the female response to his question sound like a flurry of voices, but she couldn’t really make out what they were saying.

  “How did you know to come out here now?” Karessa was happy to see him, but she hoped she hadn’t butt dialed him or something.

  “True texted me that you were on your way home.” He took her hand and helped her down the steps.

  That he called his house ‘home’ and that it warmed something deep inside of her made her trip over absolutely nothing.

  He stopped and looked at her. “Are you alright?”

  She didn’t know what she looked like to him, but when he was so close to her it was hard to believe that she wasn’t dreaming this as she had so many times before. Karessa nodded and hoped she didn’t look like an idiot.

  Beau caught her chin between his thumb and index finger as he looked down into her face, starting with her eyes and ending with her mouth before he returned to fasten his gaze on hers. She watched his gaze soften and his lips curve into a sexy smile. “You
are an adorable drunk.”

  “So are you,” she responded without thinking about how dumb that answer was. He laughed and picked her up.

  “Have fun, you two!” True yelled out behind them, and Karessa looked over Beau’s shoulder to the bus. She’d forgotten they were even there. “We’ll see you tomorrow.”

  Karessa waved while Beau carried her to the door, then she snuggled against Beau’s firm chest and closed her eyes. It was way too much moving around for her right now, and she didn’t want to ruin the sweetness of this moment by getting sick.

  He got her all the way to his door, and she wanted to get out of his arms.

  “Okay, Beau. Put me down.” Karessa knew she probably sounded crazy and her voice sounded stern, even to her own ears. He had picked her up in the first place because she was having trouble walking, but if she crossed the threshold with him carrying her like he did in all her welcome home from the honeymoon fantasies she had she would have cried like a baby. Now she knew that was the alcohol that was making her so very weepy, or at least she hoped that’s what it was.

  “Alright.” Beau put her down, then studied her to see if she was going to pitch head first into the living room. “I just wanted to make sure you got up here without falling down.”

  “I know.” She felt silly making such a big fuss when he was only trying to make sure she was alright, but if she fell into a big ball of tears and had to explain why the whole evening of getting fitted with a dress for a wedding would be for nothing, because she would be on the next flight out. “I’m just being silly.”

  “Hey,” he said as he rubbed her shoulders. “It’s not a big deal. Don’t worry about it.”

  She stood in the middle of the room and watched as he moved around. He grabbed a couple of bottles of water from the fridge, turned off a few lights, and then herded her to the bedroom where he sat her on the bed.

  “I’m sure you want a shower, but you are really tipsy, and I’m not sure you won’t fall in there. Do you want to wait until morning?” Beau opened up one of the waters and handed it to her. She took a sip and then drank the whole thing down. Who knew she was so thirsty?

  “I need a shower before I go to bed.” Karessa watched him struggle with that for a few seconds like he was wondering what he should do.

  “How about I run a bath for you and then I can be close by if you need me or I can check up on you.”

  She nodded, and he got her settled on the loveseat in his room before he went into the bathroom. Karessa wasn’t feeling as tipsy as she was before the water, and she sat there and listened to him hum some tune while he was prepping for her. She laid her head on her bent arm and concentrated on staying awake.

  There was a box on the bottom shelf of his book cabinet that drew her attention. It was odd that it was there, but she couldn’t remember why. She went to the box and wondered if she should open it or just ask about it, but then she caught a glimpse of the paper that stuck out of the box and she opened the lid.

  Inside it was one of the original pieces of her first award winning line. It was a pink demi bra and matching panties, both had embroidered pink and white roses all over them. It was too labor intensive and there were only so many made, but she adored the set. There was also a note and a small jewelry box in with it, but Karessa was feeling guilty that she’d seen so much. Was there a woman that Beau was going to give all that to and something happened? Why would he give her lingerie that his ex-girlfriend created? This shouldn’t have made her upset. If she hadn’t been snooping through his things, there wouldn’t have been a problem, but she had been snooping and all this time she’d been mourning the loss of them he’d been mooning over someone else.

  She put everything back by the time he came back to get her, but her arousal and her amorous feelings had been put into a deep freeze.

  “Your bath awaits.” Beau came in and helped her to the bathroom, but she was stone cold sober after seeing all that in the box. She took turns berating herself for seeing so much and wanting to scream because she didn’t see what was in the little jewelry box and written on the note.

  “Thank you, Beau.” Her voice sounded stiff and unnatural to her, but when she looked at him it didn’t appear that he saw a problem.

  “You are so welcome. I’m going to be around this corner shaving, but you’ll have your privacy. Let me know if you need anything.”

  She nodded, feeling even more like a heel because True had shook up this man’s life and he’d allowed her to stay in his house and his bed, and she in turn showed up to his house drunk, looked through his things, and then got mad at him for having the nerve to fall for someone else while she was gone. She was acting exactly like the diva bitch she never wanted to be. Taking off her clothes, she decided she wasn’t going to be mad that the man had bubble bath available and ready at such short notice.

  He was still humming and she thought it was cute. Beau sounded so happy. She was going to take advantage of the time together and the fact that he couldn’t see her face.

  “Beau?”

  “Yes? Are you okay?” He sounded like he had moved to the corner closest to where she was, but he didn’t come in.

  “I am, but I just thought since you fear me falling asleep and I just want to relax here for a minute, maybe we could ask each other questions to catch up.”

  “Oh…okay.” Beau didn’t sound like he thought it was a good idea, but he didn’t say no, so she moved along.

  “What is the first thing you did when I left?” Karessa didn’t know if he was going to answer because there was such a long pause.

  “I went up to the cabin for a bit to clear my head, and then when Alec and Camden came up to get me, I came back down.”

  The words were so carefully put together, she knew that it was the honest truth, but she wondered what he was leaving out.

  “My turn,” he said before she could get any additional questions in. “Were you and Luc ever a couple?”

  “What?” Karessa knew she splashed a bit because she sat up quickly. “Where did that come from?”

  “Are we supposed to find out the origin of the question or just ask the question we want an answer to?” Beau sounded like he was back in front of the mirror or at least not standing at the corner of the room she was in.

  “I guess not. That question just threw me for a loop, but no. We’ve never been a couple, or been intimate, or even kissed except for a few kisses on the cheeks, but that shouldn’t count because he’s French. They do that to everyone.” She settled back into the tub and picked up the soap and lathered up the puff as she figured out how to phrase her next question. “So…where did you get all these products for women they seem pretty refined and elegant?”

  “Ask another question?” His tone wasn’t as curt as the words, but she was a bit put off.

  “Um, okay. Did you get these items recently?” She hoped the answer was yes, because it would mean they were purchased for her and weren’t items that he bought for someone else and she was just the lucky woman who got to use them.

  “No.”

  Karessa scrubbed her body and wondered if he was done with the questions. So apparently the soap wasn’t bought for her in particular, she would have to deal with that. She didn’t want to be a pain, but there were so many questions she wanted answers for, but if they weren’t answered she supposed she’d live.

  “What’s it feel like having so many of your dreams come true?” Beau asked quietly.

  She could hear him splashing around in the water and she wondered if he was shaving his face or just getting ready for bed. There were so many ways she could go with this question. It was what reporters wanted to know and the question always made her teeter over what to say. The answer that looked great on paper wasn’t the true one, and she wanted to give him what she wanted from him. Honesty. “It’s lonely.”

  “Karessa.” His voice was a whisper, but she heard it and couldn’t be sorry for the way her truth made him feel. It was all she had to gi
ve him, because it was what he’d chosen to give her.

  “Do you ever regret sending me away without discussing why you were doing what you were doing?” She had finished washing and was rinsing off with the hand held shower wand. Then she’d dried and put on her lotion, but still there was no answer. “Beau?”

  “Karessa, it’s late and we have a good bit to do tomorrow. Let’s talk about this another time.” He sounded beat down, and as much as she wanted him to answer the question, she thought that maybe he was right. What good would the answer do to either of them now?

  “Okay.” Karessa tried to keep her voice upbeat, but she knew she needed to decide on an option that would not haunt her. She was tired, body and soul, and the answers to her questions weren’t coming tonight.

  Beau had laid out a few options for sleepwear and she chose the camisole and tap pants combination, because she always felt cute in it and they were oh, so comfortable.

  She walked toward the bed and noticed that Beau was already under the covers. The question must have been a bit too much as it looked like he wasn’t going to even say goodnight to her, but she wanted as much contact as she could get since they were in the same proximity and it would be something she thought about for the rest of her life.

  “Goodnight, Beau.” It took everything she had to stay on her side of the bed, but she did it until Beau gathered her in his arms and pulled her into him. She was more grateful that she’d ever say for that small bit of acknowledgment. Karessa pushed her ass out and hoped for the best, but she was too tired to be enticing.

  “Sweet dreams, Karessable.”

  She wanted to respond because this was the sweetest dream she was living right now, but she was too sleepy to make the effort. Her body was heated by his nearness but relaxed by it as well. She hummed out a noise that she hoped he could decipher, and that was her last thought for the night.