Fiancee By Mistake

by Walker Kate

  'And you know how you make me feel, dressed like that.'

  His voice was low and intent, his eyes dark pools in the firelight, his gaze almost a caress in itself as he came to take her hand.

  'I'm almost tempted...'

  He caught himself up sharply, a faint shake of his dark head dismissing the thoughts he had been about to reveal.

  'Come and sit down.' Gently he drew her towards the fire. 'We'll do this properly and have drinks first. What would you like? Sherry? Or there's...'

  'Sherry would be fine.' Leah had found her voice again, though it sounded rough and hesitant as if from lack of use. She almost felt as if she might be ill again, her body temperature fluctuating wildly from burning hot to icy cold and back again.

  She realised now what Sean was doing. Couldn't we start again? she had said. Act as if we were complete strangers. And he was behaving as if they were just that. As if this was their first date, so to speak, and, like a nervous suitor, he wanted to make sure everything was perfect.

  Nervous suitor! She almost laughed aloud at the thought. 'Nervous' just didn't fit as a word to describe Sean, and as for suitor!

  But she followed his lead when he started a conversation. She answered when he asked her questions about herself, listened when he told her of music he enjoyed, discussed books they had both read. All the time she felt faintly dazed by the ease with which he drew her out, the alcohol helping to relax her too, until she was smiling, laughing, eventually putting in her own questions and comments with increasing confidence.

  'Tell me about your mother,' she said, when they had moved to the table and he was occupied filling the crisp taco shells with a tasty mixture of chilli, shredded lettuce and cheese, topped with tomato salsa. 'Did she ever get over your father's desertion?'

  'Not for a long time. I really think he broke her heart. But then five years ago she met another man—a much younger man, as a matter of fact—and they were married last August."

  'You don't mind?'

  'What? That he's not much older than me? Not at all.' Sean shrugged off the question. 'If he makes her happy, I don't give a damn if he's nine or ninety-four, or if he's purple with yellow spots. It's time someone in the family made a success of an emotional relationship.'

  His words reminded Leah of a question that had been nagging at her for some time.

  'You said that you started to see another woman...' she began hesitantly, shocked to find how much it mattered.

  'After Marnie?' Sean's relaxed mood altered dramatically, his frown dark in the candlelight. 'That didn't last long.'

  'You broke it off?'

  In her mind, his declaration that nothing lasted for ever sounded with hollow significance, all the more so when she considered just why she cared about this other woman in his life.

  'Correction, she broke it off.' Sean reached for his glass, swirling the wine round in the bottom of it as he stared down into the ruby liquid. 'After the accident.'

  'She cared about the scar?' Leah couldn't believe that anyone could possibly be so shallow.

  'She cared more about what it meant.' Sean's laughter was darkly cynical, his mouth twisting at the memory. 'The possibility of no more starring roles, no more sex symbol. She didn't like what it meant for her future.'

  'But that's awful!'

  He shrugged again, even more dismissively. 'At least she was honest.'

  'Then she can't possibly have loved you!'

  Love. It reverberated inside her skull like a warning bell, combining with the feelings she had already experienced and making her realise just why they were significant.

  Love. That was the emotion she'd been struggling with for days, the feeling that had grown steadily inside her since that cataclysmic meeting on the snow-covered road.

  'Love?' Sean enunciated the word as if it was in some new and incomprehensible language. 'I wasn't looking for love. Marnie cured me of that.'

  'Oh, but you must have been! Everyone...'

  'Everyone wants to be loved? Is that what you were going to say?' Sean enquired, a sardonic edge to his voice implying a strong disbelief in the assertion. 'I don't take that as a given. Not everyone is looking for commitment.'

  'But...'

  Oh, why couldn't she stop? Why did she have to give so much away?

  'But you are,' he interjected when her nerve failed her.

  His firm pronouncement had an effect like a blow to her heart, bruising it painfully.

  'Was that what your fiancé offered you? Love and devotion and happy ever after?!

  Love. Hearing the word spoken in that beautiful deep voice sparked off memories she wasn't emotionally equipped to handle. From a hidden corner of her mind came the recollection of how, on the previous night, she had drifted to sleep while waiting for him to come back into her room. At some point she had sensed his presence beside her bed, but she had been too tired even to open her eyes or lift her head.

  Lying there, half-conscious, she had heard his soft words, felt the even softer kiss. 'Goodnight, love...' he had said, but anyone who had heard his cynical declaration that love was just a myth, a fantasy, could not escape the truth. She wasn't his love and never would be.

  'I told you, Andy isn't my fiancé!'

  She concentrated hard on spooning chilli into another taco shell, almost as if her life depended on not spilling a single drop.

  'So you did.'

  He was refilling their wine glasses with a generous hand as he spoke, and, well aware that she had already had quite enough, Leah tried to protest.

  But as she had just taken an enthusiastic bite of her food her mouth was full of the spicy mixture and the result was just an incoherent murmur. It turned rapidly into a cry of annoyance as the crisp corn shell splintered, squeezing the meat sauce out over her hand.

  Dropping the taco back onto her plate, she started to lick her fingers clean, freezing suddenly as she became conscious of Sean's intent blue gaze.

  'Did you know you had tomato stains on your chin?' The question was warm and soft, laughter lifting it at the end, 'Here, let me...'

  With his napkin he carefully wiped away the mess from below her mouth.

  'And there's some more here—you're in a real state!'

  The white linen moved to her top lip, brushing softly over its full outline.

  Leah's heart seemed to stand still suddenly, then jerk back into action at an accelerated rate. Swallowing hard, she drew in a deep, uneven breath.

  "That's the trouble—or the fun, depending on the way you look at it—with this meal.' She struggled to inject a lightness she was far from feeling into the words. 'It's so amazingly messy that it's the sort of thing you can only eat with someone you're very close to, and so can be totally relaxed with, or someone you never want to see again, so you don't mind if you make a real fool of yourself.'

  Too late she saw the trap she'd dug for herself but couldn't retreat from. She could only wait as Sean squeezed his napkin into a ball with one hand, his eyes fixed on her face, blue eyes very dark and serious.

  'And which of those would you say describes what we have?'

  'I...' She licked dry lips nervously. 'I don't know.'

  'Which one would you like it to be?' It was noticeably softer, an octave deeper.

  'I...'

  She couldn't find the words to answer him, and she couldn't look anywhere but into those mesmerising eyes, seeing in their darkness the reflection of the flicker of the candlelight.

  'Perhaps you'll find another question easier to answer. So, tell me, when you get out of here—because this snow can't last for ever—what are you going to do?'

  Leah's hand had lifted to reach for her glass, but now it froze again. She could try to dodge the issue, to pretend that she didn't know what he meant, but to do so would be craven and weak, and Sean would know it too.

  He wasn't asking her about her career or her parents, or what she would do about her car, but about one very important and specific issue.

  B
ut it wasn't a simple issue to resolve. The answer to his question came trailing complicated strings of repercussions that would affect every part of her future, possibly even the whole of her life.

  'Leah?' he prompted harshly when she hesitated, eyeing him like a terrified rabbit transfixed by the lights of an oncoming car. 'You must know. What answer are you going to give to Andy?'

  Leah drew in a deep, shuddering breath. And suddenly it was so very simple. It was as if a light had gone on inside her head, one that illuminated everything around it with startling clarity.

  She didn't have to think or to question. There was no room for any doubt at all in her mind. There was only one possible answer.

  After all, hadn't she known this deep down from the very start? Hadn't she known from the moment she had realised that simply being with Sean could drive all thought of Andy from her head that what she felt for the other man was not love but a sense of gratitude and comfort, seeing him as a support at a difficult time?

  'No,' she said with absolute conviction. Tm going to tell him that no, I can't marry him.'

  She knew from Sean's expression, from the sudden blaze of reaction deep in his eyes, that he understood all that was involved in her answer, everything that was behind it, unspoken and yet so very clear.

  'Leah...'

  And then as Sean pushed back his chair, his midnight-blue gaze still fixed on her face, she saw that there was one more thing she had to do to make sure there was no room left for doubt.

  'And the answer to your other question is yes,' she said firmly and confidently, no trace of hesitation in her voice. 'Saying no to Andy means I'm saying yes to you.'

  The chair-legs scraped on the floor as he stood up in a rush, his hands going out to pull her up beside him.

  She moved with him, no room for hesitation or even for thought in her mind. She was all need, all hunger, her body instantly on fire at the touch of his hands, the fierce pressure of his lips on her mouth. And that fire was fuelled by the absolute certainty that this was right. This was what she had known must come, what was as inevitable as the beat of her heart.

  There was no time for gentleness, for care, for finesse. Each was as hungry as the other, greedy for the touch of skin on skin, for the heat of each intimate caress felt without the barrier of clothes.

  Leah's hands were as urgent on the buttons of his shirt as his on the velvet of her dress. As she tugged them free from their fastenings with a trembling impatience he pushed up the clinging fabric of her skirt, hot fingers curving into the soft flesh at the tops of her legs, pressing her hard against him.

  'Don't you think we'd be more comfortable upstairs?' Sean's question was a hoarse, shaken laugh against her mouth, the words as raw and uneven as every shuddering breath he took.

  'Do you care about comfort?' Leah muttered back. 'It's too late for that—far, far too late.'

  His sigh was an acknowledgement of the truth of her compelling assertion. Neither of them could wait, nor delay what was happening a moment longer.

  There was no need of foreplay, or any caress used to heighten the anticipation, awaken the senses to the prospect of the pleasure to come. Every moment since their first meeting had been building up to this, Leah thought raggedly. Each minute they had spent in each other's company had added further fuel to the already blazing fire of need until it had turned into this most violently frenzied inferno that nothing could subdue, nothing could control.

  And so she moved with Sean when he half walked, half carried her towards the hearth and laid her down on the rug before the fire. With yearning hands she helped him ease the velvet dress from her body, writhing sensuously as she felt the warmth of the flames on her skin, the pale flesh dappled with firelight and shadow.

  'You too,' she murmured with a mock petulant frown as he came down beside her, still partially clothed, the shirt she had unbuttoned hanging loose over his wide chest

  'Me too,' he whispered in laughing agreement.

  The shirt was swiftly discarded, shrugged off even as his impatient mouth sought the warm curves of her breasts. Somehow he managed to continue to kiss her while his hands dealt with the fastenings on the rest of his clothing, tossing it aside with careless impatience as he moved to crush her closer to him.

  'Better?'

  'Much better!' It was a sound of dark contentment deep in her throat. 'And now...'

  'No!'

  Strong hands closed over hers when she would have reached for the fastening of her silky bra, his fingers manacling her wrists and imprisoning them on the rug above her head,

  "That pleasure is mine,' he growled, arousal thickening and roughening his voice so that it sounded more raw, more huskily male than ever before. 'Lie still and let me handle things.'

  She tried. She tried her damnedest to control the buzzing impatience that jangled every nerve-end, set her pulse searing through her veins. But when Sean's free hand didn't give her the sensation she sought, instead smoothing slowly and deliberately down the side of her ribcage, along the curving indentation of her waist and along the delicate band of lace that topped her briefs, she couldn't stand it any longer.

  Her body bucked beneath that tormenting touch. Her eyes blazed with a need she didn't even try to hide from him. And a wild, keening sound escaped her lips before she flung a muttered protest into his shadowed face.

  'Patience, darling, patience!'

  The trace of laughter in his voice was the last straw.

  'I'll give you patience!' she declared, desperation giving her the strength she needed to wrench her hands free from his restraining grip. 'Let's see how patient you can be...'

  With a smile of triumph she felt him shiver under the slide of her fingertips, heard the groan of surrender that formed in his throat as her hands crept lower...lower... When at last they closed around the most intimate part of his body he expelled his breath in a violent curse that delighted her with its obvious evidence of his loss of control.

  'You little witch!'

  Even as he shuddered in response to her touch, his hands were busy. Wrenching away the last flimsy barriers between them, he discarded them into the darkness beyond the firelight before setting himself to wreak a sensual revenge on her.

  First his hands and then his lips played over her body in a deliberately tormenting progress that had her crying out her need in a sharp, shaken voice.

  Only then did he ease his body over hers, urging her thighs apart with the pressure of his. Supporting his upper body on his arms, he watched her face as he eased himself into her, the glaze of a fiercely reined-in passion darkening his eyes as he saw her twist beneath him in response.

  'Is this what you wanted, Leah? Is this...?'

  'Oh, yes!' She was reaching for him even as she spoke, her hands closing over his shoulders, drawing him down to her so that she felt the full weight and strength of his body over hers. 'Yes, it's what I've always wanted...always...'

  But when he moved again all power of speech left her. She could only feel, exult in the pulsing strength of him inside her and in her own soaring response. Slowly, inexorably, the rhythm built and built, taking them both higher and higher until there was nowhere else to go but over the edge and into the very heart of the conflagration, letting it bum them up completely.

  Afterwards, she curled up in his arms, unable to speak, unable even to think. And Sean just held her, as if he too had been shaken by the intensity of what they had experienced, as if be too needed time to come to terms with it.

  From there she drifted into sleep, stirring only reluctantly when she felt a hand on her shoulder and heard Sean's voice in her ear.

  'Leah,' he whispered huskily. 'Leah, wake up.'

  'Mmm?' She didn't want to move. She wanted to stay where she was, drifting on the warm, gentle sea-swell of contentment that seemed to flood her whole body.

  'Leah,' he persisted, more sharply now. There's something I want to show you.'

  Yawning, blinking sleepily, she sat up and looked round h
er expectantly. Beside her, Sean had already pulled on his trousers and shirt, leaving the latter unbuttoned over the width of his chest

  'What?'

  'Not here,' he laughed. 'Outside. Here, you'll need this.'

  Reaching for the cream sweater he had left lying over the back of a chair earlier that evening, he pulled it over her head and helped her slide her arms into the sleeves.

  It was far too big for her, the creamy cashmere falling to her thighs like a soft knitted tunic. Looking at her, Sean's eyes darkened again, and a groan that was a blend of delight and torment sounded in his throat.

  'God, but you would tempt a saint! Come here!'

  She thought he wanted to kiss her, but instead he pulled her to her feet and swung her up into his arms, making her gasp with shock.

  'Sean!'

  'Hush, sweetheart. There's something very special I want you to see.'

  He carried her through to the kitchen, gently setting her back onto her feet before opening the door and gesturing with one hand.

  'Look...'

  'Snow!' Leah's disappointment sounded in her voice. 'You brought me out here to—'

  'No.' Gentle fingers came under her chin, lifting her face until she was staring at the sky. 'Look!'

  And then she saw-it. The pale, gleaming shape of the full moon high in the clear sky, and at one side the dark shadow, like a bite taken out of it, slowly, gradually encroaching on the light.

  'An eclipse!' Leah let her breath escape on an entranced sigh. 'I've always wanted to see one, but never had the chancel'

  How long they stayed there, arms around each other, their eyes fixed on the heavens, she had no idea. She was only aware of the magical phenomenon before them, watching transfixed as the darkness slowly crept over the silver circle of the moon until its light was almost blotted out, only the faintest glimmer showing at the outermost rim. Then, at last, she turned to the silent man beside her.

  'Oh, Sean! That was magical!'

  'Not quite the Christmas star.' He smiled. 'But close enough.'

  But as he bent to brush a swift, delicate kiss across her parted lips his dark head blotted out the sky, and suddenly an icy, uneasy sensation crept over Leah's skin like frozen footprints, making her shiver in uncontrollable response.