Mr. Black's Proposal

by Aubrey Dark

  Steph was different. She moved with confident grace, but whenever I led her in a certain direction, she followed willingly. Eagerly. It gave me more hope than perhaps it should have. God, I’d never been so unsure about a woman before.

  When dessert was over, I decided to push a little farther.

  “Come back to my place for drinks.”

  She looked at me warily.

  “I’m not sure…”

  I shrugged. I’d learned from experience not to press certain things, and this was one of them.

  “That’s fine. I can take you home. I just thought you might like to talk a bit longer.”

  With any other girl, it would have been a lie, but this time it was true. We’d been talking all dinner, but I felt like I could stay in a conversation with Steph forever. I wanted to know everything about her. I wanted to know all of the funny things that had happened in her past. I wanted to know her hopes for the future.

  “Well… maybe…”

  “No proposal. I promise.” I held up my hands.

  She giggled, and I realized for the first time that she’d been drinking wine all night. Maybe it wasn’t such a good idea. But then she smiled, and any thought I’d had to the contrary went out the window.

  “Sure,” she said. “Maybe one drink.”

  As soon as we were through the apartment door, Otis attacked us with slobbery kisses.

  “No! Down!” I said, pulling at his collar. Shit. I’d forgotten to tell Alex to lock him up. I hoped that Steph wasn’t too put off.

  I shouldn’t have worried. As soon as she saw him, she fell to her knees and hugged her arms around him. Otis barked happily, his tail wagging so hard I thought it would fall off his butt.

  “Who’s the best puppy in the world? Who’s my favorite puppy? You’re my favorite puppy! Yes you are! Oh, yes you are!”

  Otis flopped into her belly rub and they both fell down together on the carpet. I was a little miffed that my dog seemed to be getting more action than I was on my date, but I could forgive him. He was the best puppy ever.

  “He likes you,” I said. That was an understatement. None of the girls I’d ever brought home would have dreamed about rolling around on the floor in a dress. Steph was… something special. She scratched his ears and kissed the top of his head.

  “I hope he forgives me for making him sick with sheet cake. Do you forgive me, pretty puppy?”

  “Ha! That was all his fault. You should be the one to forgive him. You’re a thief, Otis.”

  Otis wagged his tail in happy agreement. Steph pulled herself up from the carpet.

  “Oh, you have fur all over you,” I said. Fortunately, Otis was a yellow lab and her dress was just about the same color, but I could see the hairs stuck all over the fabric.

  “No problem,” Steph said brightly. “Let’s have drinks!”

  I hadn’t realized just how tipsy she was, but then again I’d barely had a single glass of wine with dinner. Steph was already at the bar, opening up the cabinet.

  “Wow,” she said, pulling out a bottle of whiskey to examine. “This is some crazy stuff.”

  “That was a present from Clint,” I said. That had been a wild birthday, indeed.

  “Let me make you my special cocktail,” she said, putting back the bottle.

  “You have a special cocktail?”

  “I call it a Caribbean Cupcake Cocktail. Do you have rum and brown sugar?”

  “Uh, sure.”

  I didn’t know how much of this was Steph being flirtatious with me and how much was due to the alcohol. But as she mixed the drinks, she chattered on happily and we settled into a nice conversation. The rum cocktail she’d made loosened me up, and I stopped worrying about scaring her off. I was getting more and more comfortable, at least until she brought up a different subject.

  “Tell me about your family,” she said.

  “I—well, my mom is about the only family I have. You met her already.”

  “What about your dad?”

  I bit my tongue.

  “My dad was not a good man.”

  “What do you mean?” she asked. Before I could reply, she held up her hand. “Sorry, I’m too curious. If you don’t want to talk about it, we can totally not talk about it. Andy always says I’m too pushy that way.”

  I took a breath.

  “No, it’s okay. He was… a cheater.”

  “Oh.” Her eyes narrowed, and I could feel her pulling back. Warning signs went off all over in my mind. I put my drink down.

  “You know what, I don’t really want to talk about this now,” I said.

  “That’s okay.”

  “It’s okay?”

  “Sure.”

  There was a pause, the first awkward pause we’d had all night. If it had been any other girl, I would have been pushing her toward the bedroom. But I didn’t want to do anything that would make her regret tonight.

  “I should have Alex take you home,” I said, smiling apologetically. “It’s late.”

  “It’s not that late.”

  Oh, God.

  She stepped forward, a crooked smile on her lips, and kissed me. The taste of brown sugar was on her lips. I couldn’t help but kiss her back, my arms drawing around her instinctively. God, she was perfect against my body.

  The tip of her tongue slipped against my lips, and my pulse jumped to double time. Heat raced through my groin as my cock went hard. Before I could pull away, she was pressing her thigh against me.

  “Steph—”

  “God, I’m so wet right now,” she whispered. “I’ve been thinking about you.” Her fingers brushed carelessly over the front of my pants.

  “Wait, Steph.”

  I forced myself back, trying to get my breath back to normal. The way she’d kissed me had sent my body into complete overdrive, and it took all my willpower to stammer out an excuse.

  “You have to wake up early,” I said.

  “Andy said he would open for me tomorrow.”

  She stepped toward me again, and I caught her hands in mine, holding them chastely between us.

  “Wait.”

  She bit her lip. Such delicious plump lips. I wanted to bite them, to nibble and lick and suck until she moaned with pleasure. But I wasn’t going to push things too far tonight. Even if she thought she wanted to, I wasn’t sure it was the best idea.

  “What is it?”

  I breathed in deeply. Every inch of me was throbbing with desire, but I couldn’t do it. I wanted her—God, how I wanted her—but more than that, I wanted to know that she was one hundred percent ready for me.

  “I think you should go home now,” I said, as calmly as I could manage.

  Disappointment washed over her face. For a moment, I had an aching urge to sweep her into my arms. The bed was right there, and she was willing. Oh, Lord, she was willing. When had I ever stopped myself from going to bed with a willing girl?

  This one was different. This one was worth the wait.

  “Fine,” she said, stepping back.

  “I can have Alex take you—”

  “I’ll take a cab.” Anger mixed with disappointment in her words.

  “Alex can call one for you.”

  “I’m perfectly capable of calling for one myself. I don’t need a butler for every damn thing.”

  She grabbed her purse and slung it over her shoulder. She was slightly wobbly as she strode toward the door.

  “Steph—”

  “What?”

  “I had a great time tonight.”

  Her eyes glistened, and I couldn’t tell if it was the alcohol or tears that made them shine so bright.

  “Me too.”

  Chapter Seven

  Steph

  I slammed the door so hard it echoed down the hall. How had I fucked it up so badly? Lucas had walked me out to the street and given me a chaste kiss on the cheek. Fuck. I’d basically thrown myself at him, and he’d thrown me out on my ass.

  “Steph? You home?”

&nb
sp; “Yeah!”

  Andy came bounding in with an eager look of anticipation. It was too much to see my brother like that, waiting for me to tell him about what had happened when, in fact, nothing had happened. I flopped down on the couch and burst into tears.

  “Stephy! What’s the matter?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “What do you mean? What happened?”

  Andy sat down next to me, his arms around me. I leaned into him for comfort, but even the most comforting little brother wasn’t enough of a help right now.

  “I don’t think he likes me anymore,” I sniffled.

  “The date went bad?”

  I frowned as I thought about it. No, the date hadn’t gone bad. When Lucas had danced a slow dance with me, his fingers had sent thrills through all of my nerves. We’d had a great conversation, and I thought that everything was going fine. But then I’d thrown myself at him, and he had rejected me completely.

  “I don’t know,” I said. “No. It went okay. But then I went to kiss him and he nearly tripped over himself trying to get me away from him.”

  “Oh, sis.” Andy held out the Kleenex box and I pulled out a handful of tissues, blotting them ineffectually against my eyes.

  “And then he called me a cab and didn’t even kiss me on the lips, and GOD, I feel so rejected!”

  “He’s an idiot.”

  “He’s not. I’m the idiot.”

  “Steph, you are the smartest woman I know.”

  I blinked my tears away.

  “Who are you and what have you done with my little brother?” I asked, sniffing into the tissue. Andy smiled sympathetically.

  “Well. This may not be the best time to tell you this,” Andy said. “Buuuuuut….”

  “Tell me what?”

  “Perq Coffee called. They want to double their order for cupcakes.”

  “Double?”

  “Starting next week Monday.”

  “That’s impossible. We can’t do it.” We were already at full capacity. We might be able to squeeze out a few more batches, but that was it for now.

  “Well, that’s the thing.”

  “What’s the thing?” All of my tears were gone, replaced by a stabbing worry in my chest. I didn’t know which was better.

  “They said if we can’t do it, they’ll have to move to another supplier.”

  “What?”

  “Sorry. I just—”

  “What?”

  “If you maybe asked Lucas for a loan, we could—”

  “No. Uh-uh. Not happening. After tonight? No. No way.”

  “But we can’t—”

  “It doesn’t matter.” I stood up. “I’ll make more cupcakes starting now.”

  “More cupcakes? What are you going to do, give up sleep?”

  “Sure. And I’ll find us a bigger spot and get a loan from the bank.”

  “That’s going to take longer than a few days.”

  “We’ll manage.”

  “How?”

  I could cry. This would have been great news if they had given us more notice, but I didn’t know how I could make the timeline work. I pursed my lips and thought about what I would have to do.

  “Somehow,” I said finally. “I’m magical, remember?”

  Monday came and went. I was too busy to do anything other than work, but I got out the double batch of cupcakes to Perq like they wanted.

  Tuesday, Rachel texted me to say she was singing at a jazz club, but I couldn’t make it. Then she texted me again, all excited about some guy. I would have been happy for her, but I was too tired to feel anything after getting only three hours of sleep.

  Wednesday I had to tell Lacey I couldn’t make it to her dress fitting. She understood, but I was still upset. I was her maid of honor, after all. How was I going to be any help when I was so freaking busy?

  Lucas called me and left messages. I was too embarrassed to call him back after the last time. Even if I had time to date, I didn’t think I could take being rejected again.

  By Friday evening, I had bags under my eyes. I was dirt tired. I couldn’t keep it up.

  Then, the mixer stopped working again right as I’d dumped the last of the expensive clove and cinnamon spice jar into the unmixed batter.

  “No! No, no, no!”

  I slammed my hand against it. The mixer whined and whined and didn’t mix.

  “NO!”

  I took the unmixed batter and threw the bowl against the wall. The cinnamon puffed into the air as the rest of the batter went everywhere. Flour and eggs and milk splashed over the floor. It was terrible and stupid and utterly satisfying. For the first time all week, I felt like I had finally expressed my anger.

  Then the doorbell jangled in the front of the shop.

  I looked down at my apron, covered in flour. I was pretty sure my hair was in a similar state. Oh, well. There was no way this day was getting any worse, no matter how bad I looked in front of customers. I marched out to the front of the shop, gritting my teeth and ready for anything.

  Anything except him.

  Before I could turn around, Lucas raised his head. He was leaning against the front counter, looking so handsome I could cry. His hair was perfectly styled and he wore a slim dark suit that accentuated his perfect figure. When he smiled, I think my heart broke apart a little inside.

  “You didn’t answer my calls,” he said. God, he looked too perfect. Why was he even here?

  “I’ve been busy.”

  “Too busy to send a text?”

  “Yes, actually,” I said.

  “You look tired.”

  That was it. He could come in here with his perfect suit and his perfect smile, but there was no way I was going to sit back and let myself be insulted like that.

  “Thanks a lot,” I snapped. “You’re a real Prince fucking Charming, you know that?”

  “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” His smile melted into concern. “I didn’t mean it like that.”

  “Yeah, right.”

  “Andy told me about the new order you have from that coffeeshop.”

  I held up my hand.

  “Don’t even talk about it.”

  “Why not?”

  “I don’t need your help.”

  I saw my mom in my mind’s eye, with one of the men she’d dated. I shook the thought away.

  Lucas raised one eyebrow.

  “Why not?”

  “I’m not… I don’t want to be one of your girls like that.”

  “Steph—”

  “No! I won’t be like that!”

  In my mind, my mom was clinging to her date’s elbow at the door. She whispered in his ear, and he reached into his pocket. No. Not like that.

  “Like what?” Lucas asked.

  “So fucking needy! So fucking dependent! Just like my mom. I’d rather die!”

  I turned away so he couldn’t see the tears in my eyes. Instead of leaving, though, Lucas came quickly around the counter. He put a hand on my shoulder and I cringed. I didn’t want his pity.

  “Your mom? What does your mom have to do with this?” he asked softly.

  I shook my head, unwilling to look him in the eye.

  “She was like that, always dating another guy as soon as the last one left her. She took their money, always, or drugs. She never worked. She just sucked up their money until they were dry.”

  I couldn’t stop talking. Now that he’d opened it up, I just couldn’t stop.

  “She fucked them and took their money, and she said they were just being nice guys, but they weren’t. Most of them knew exactly what they were doing. Hey, it’s cheaper than a hooker, right?”

  “Steph—”

  “And when they couldn’t do it anymore, they would dump her, and she’d go out and find another one. I remember her caking on the makeup to try and look younger. She couldn’t do it forever, and it got harder and harder as she got older, and when I left home, she was still doing it. Can you imagine, fifty-five years old and fucking whatev
er guys would buy her dinner and maybe slip her a twenty? She might as well have been a hooker, for all the guys she went through like that. There was one time…”

  I trailed off, seeing the scene like it was yesterday.

  “What?”

  “Don’t tell Andy,” I said. “You can’t tell him. He doesn’t know. He was too young to understand.”

  Lucas put one hand on mine. I couldn’t believe I was telling him this. But it felt good, in a way, to let all of the bad stuff just pour out of me. I was too exhausted to stop it.

  “Understand what?”

  “She came back with this new guy. He was old and smelled terrible, and they had been drinking. I only knew a little bit about drugs back then, but I knew when she had run out. When she ran out, it was bad. And that night, it was bad. They were on the couch, and I saw him with his hands all over her, his body on top of her. And her head lolled back, and—”

  There was a lump in my throat. I choked it down. I had never told anyone about this, but now I couldn’t help it. It was like a poisonous blister that had been festering for too long, and all I wanted to do was pop it and drain all the poison away.

  “And her eyes were just dead. Like she didn’t care about him at all, there was nothing there. Nothing but a blank, stupid need. She needed drugs, she needed money, and this was just something that she had to do before she could shoot up again. And I turned and ran away back to the bedroom where Andy was sleeping and I stayed there while it happened.”

  I wiped the tears from my eyes, but more spilled over my cheeks.

  “This isn’t about you helping me with my business, Lucas. It’s about letting a guy be in control of my happiness. I won’t let that happen. Because if you give me something, you can take it away. And I… I can’t risk that.”

  He stood in front of me. His blue eyes gleamed with unshed tears. And then he held out his arms.

  “I won’t ever do that to you, Steph,” he said. “Please. Just… please…”

  I crumpled into his arms. He folded me up into an embrace that was gentle and firm and good, too good. I didn’t deserve it.

  “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry.” I sobbed against his chest.

  “Shhh,” he said. “It’s okay.”

  I gripped his shoulder with my hand as I stifled the sobs that seemed to bubble up, neverending, from the past.