Going Hard: Boys of Fall

by Cari Quinn

  Condoms. Good point. Did she have any left that weren’t expired? She’d forgotten to check dates and restock before her failed bar expeditions, and well, hers hadn’t been used for a fortnight or fifteen. Did Rafe?

  Would she ever get to use a condom again?

  “So what’s the real deal?” Paige asked in a low voice, moving over to nudge the picnic basket with her open-toed shoes.

  “What real deal? I’m not adventurous enough to go swimming in the winter. That’s for you and your sex maniacs.”

  Paige simply smiled. She was used to putting up with a double dose of snark, thanks to the two men in her life.

  She also wasn’t put off by Hollie’s prickly nature. No one was. They all thought she was cute and adorably grumpy, like a disgruntled porcupine.

  “Rafe has some chest, doesn’t he?”

  Hollie glowered at the picnic basket. He’d forgotten to pick up the blanket, so she knelt to handle the task. “Rafe who?”

  Laughing, Paige crouched beside her to help. “My best friend’s brother. Your brother’s best friend.”

  “Ex,” Hollie said automatically.

  “Not really ex. They’re just having an extended joint mantrum. I have faith they’ll work it out.”

  Hollie snorted out a laugh as she folded the blanket. Paige popped open the top of the basket so she could tuck it inside. “You have more faith than I do. Rafe carries one hell of a grudge.”

  “He loves hard, so of course he hoards his anger. Usually what people do who feel a lot.”

  She started to argue. Rafe love hard? He didn’t love anyone but his mama and Charli. Wade was far in the past. She didn’t even know if he had any other close friends. As for lovers, she was pretty sure he was mostly celibate, other than the lovers he’d mentioned that afternoon, and if he hadn’t been, she didn’t want to know.

  But he would die for his family. She had no doubts about that one. He just kept his circle super small.

  “Yeah, okay, I guess I can see that,” she admitted.

  “He’s a careful guy, you know? Doesn’t do anything casually. Not even date. So if he does do something, you can bet he’s thought it through from every angle. And he’s decided it’s worth enough to pursue.”

  Hollie digested Paige’s words, then glanced at her soon-to-be sister-in-law. “What the hell are you talking about?”

  “This, for one.” Paige held up the bikini top that Hollie had held—and must’ve promptly dropped, after pouting that no one had noticed she was being a bad girl.

  Yeah, right. She couldn’t even be a bad girl with assistance.

  Now she had to deal with the fallout. Time to see if she lied as badly as she did playing the vamp.

  “Oh, that.” Nimbly, Hollie grabbed her top. “I took it off once Rafe gave me his shirt. You know how he is. All chivalrous.”

  “Maybe so. I also know he’d be damn lucky to get a chance with you.”

  She nearly parroted Paige, but somehow managed to get a hold of herself. “You think so?”

  “I know so. You’re a lot of fun, Hol. You’d be good for a guy like Rafe.”

  “Only if he figured that out,” she muttered. “He’s pretty dense.”

  “It helps when you take off your top.” Paige winked and stood. “I’m going to go help the guys. They never can grill a damn thing right.”

  Hollie grinned. “Truth, sister.”

  “You okay with us sticking around for dinner?”

  “Seems like it’s already happening.”

  “No, not if you’re not all right with it. This is your house. We play by your rules.”

  Hollie tilted her head. Her rules. Though technically it was her parents’ house, she couldn’t deny that she liked the sound of that. “Nah. Mi casa es su casa.”

  And lookie, she even knew some Spanish of her own. Nothing like Rafe’s “you drive me crazy” or “fuck me hard”.

  She shivered. Or “beauty”, said in his deep, husky voice.

  “Hopefully Rafe will hang around for a while too. I’m figuring y’all have some unfinished business.” Paige smiled and wandered off to join the guys by the grill.

  Hollie sat back on her feet and wound her bikini top through her fingers. Maybe she should take Paige’s advice, though she hadn’t exactly come out with any. But Rafe’s stubbornness had been implied if not overtly stated. Also, that he was a damn good guy at the core, even if he cloaked it in some layers of overprotectiveness now and then.

  He also enjoyed blowjobs, so perhaps that might mean he would enjoy partaking in the reverse? She blushed and squirmed a little, feeling like an idiot. Luckily no one was close enough to see her getting all eager beaverish about well, beaver action.

  She’d only experienced that once, and it had been…not inspiring. Definitely not worthy of what she’d seen and liked about four-hundred-twenty-two times on Tumblr. That wasn’t even talking about the latest blog she’d followed—Pussy Eater 4 Life.

  Hey, a girl could dream.

  She wandered over to where Rafe continued to fuss with the picnic basket.

  Her best guess? He was avoiding socializing. Because that’s what Rafe 2.0 did, though back in high school he hadn’t been nearly as reticent to talk to people. Especially people like Colt, who’d been his pal since the Martinez family had come to town. Sure, he’d been closer to Wade, but still.

  And yes, there was the fact that Colt had divorced Rafe’s sister to add some tension. But c’mon, that was old news. Charli and Colt were great friends now. Why should Rafe get a bee in his man bonnet every time Colt entered the general vicinity?

  Oh yeah, because he was Rafael Martinez, and his man bonnet was perennially tied way too tight.

  “Hey.” She crouched at his side and covered his hand on the basket. “You going to hide in the corner all day or come out and play with the others?”

  He glanced up at her, then did a seeming double take. “Your glasses. You put them back on.”

  “Yeah. That’s what I do. Wear glasses.” She shoved him lightly. “Weirdo.”

  “But you weren’t wearing them before.” He cleared his throat and her eyebrows climbed as she leaned in closer.

  “You mean when I had my mouth on your dick? It was big enough for me to see nice and clear.” She looked down between his legs. His crouching stance gave her a lovely view of everything tucked up in his boxers. “Just like it is now.”

  “Hollie.” His stern reprimand had her shaking her head.

  Seriously? He was jumping right back on that track again? The one where he was mature and she was an impetuous horndog?

  All right, maybe she was those things. But she had moments of maturity too.

  Like right now.

  She rose and held out a hand to him. “Come on, let’s go join the others.”

  He stared at her hand as if she’d sprouted snakes for fingers. “What’re you doing?” he asked in a low voice.

  “Eating a meal with a guy I feel friendly toward and my brother and his fiancé and fiancée. Unless you have a problem with acting, oh, I don’t know, normal?”

  He set his jaw, giving her a momentary glimpse of his pearly whites in the encroaching darkness. “We’re not dating.”

  The pang that crashed through her stomach wasn’t anything but indigestion. Stupid delicious sandwich. “I know that.”

  “Then?”

  “You know what? Never mind. Stay over here and sulk.” She turned her back on him and marched over to the circle of chairs Colt, Drake and Paige had set up near the grill.

  Fifteen minutes later, when she and Paige were comparing pedicures by the light of her iPhone’s flashlight, Rafe finally deigned to join them. Except rather than sitting beside her in the empty chair, he dragged it over to Drake’s side and immediately launched into a discussion about some fence being built at Coach’s and the boys of fall.

  He hadn’t even played much on the team, and Drake definitely hadn’t, as he was a newer transplant. Anything to avoid engaging i
n potentially sexual byplay with her in front of witnesses.

  God forbid.

  “I hate men,” she muttered, accidentally cutting off Paige’s explanation of the benefits of natural polishes.

  “You’re telling me? I have two.”

  Hollie rested her chin on her fist. “Yeah, but a menage every night? Sister, that’s every girl’s fantasy. Minus the fact one of them is that oaf over there.” She jutted her chin out at Colt and he flipped her off without dropping his spatula.

  He’d probably slip a grasshopper in her burger. Roughage, Hol. It won’t hurt ya.

  In spite of herself, she grinned. She loved these people. All of them, even Rafe.

  Her eyes popped wide. In a family way, of course. She didn’t love-love him. Why would she? She’d spent half the days since her teen years either pretending she’d never had feelings for him at all or trying to get over him.

  Hmm, yeah, that might be why.

  “Yours love you,” she said to Paige instead of all the things she could have said.

  Should have said, like how they’re smelly and messy, though Rafe wasn’t either of those things, ever. She’d never seen him anything but freshly showered and usually he kept his office way neater than she kept her own closet at the library. They also tended to have unattractive personal habits, such as farting in bed and having nose hair. Just having it was bad enough. Her own nose was pristine.

  Though she really couldn’t imagine Rafe passing wind anywhere ever. He was meticulous in all ways.

  Other than the fact he wanted to hide away their involvement and his inability to loosen up, he really was an exemplary specimen of a man. Devoted to his mother and sister, someone who gave back to the community, a tidy sandwich eater.

  He just didn’t happen to love her back, as a friend or—as a friend.

  Just friends, always and forever, amen.

  “Yeah, they do.” Paige tipped her shoulder against Hollie’s. “But it took some work to get to that point. It’s usually a struggle.”

  “I’m tired of struggling. I want easy sex delivered to my door. Isn’t that why God invented eharmony.com?”

  Across the circle, Rafe’s head lifted like he was scenting fresh meat. But it wasn’t the steak on the grill that caught his attention.

  Oh no, it was her reference to sex.

  Paige laughed into her fist. “I’m not sure God had a hand in it, though it seems as though he might have from the commercials.”

  “It’s a woman’s right to enjoy sex, don’t you think?”

  “I certainly do.”

  “And to do it without shame. To stand up and say proudly I just had sex, and I want more of the same, and if you’re not going to give it to me, well then—”

  “Well then,” Paige prompted.

  Hollie sighed. “Yeah, that’s the part I always stumble on.”

  “Maybe it’s not sex that’s your problem. Carnal pursuits are important, but they aren’t everything.”

  “Says who?” Colt said from the grill. Drake and Rafe were still talking about football and ranching and who knows what else, though she hadn’t missed the eye Rafe kept giving her.

  “Another country heard from,” Paige said, tapping her phone against her knee. “Good sex is a start. It’s frosting. It can be cake, but there needs to be a few layers. Some amazing filling that has nothing to do with blowing out the candles.”

  “You’re mixing metaphors, but I’m following you. Please continue.”

  “You need to pace yourself at the table. Sure, you can gorge, but then you need to see if the crumbs that are left are enough to build on. Sometimes cake is just cake.”

  “And sometimes my steak burgers are fucking done. Dinnertime, people!”

  Hollie rolled her eyes at her boorish brother. “So what you’re saying is that if I were to want more of the cake than just frosting—which hasn’t yet been determined, because I’m still trying to eat the fondant roses—I need to take time to explore what’s in the other layers.”

  “Yes. Exactly. Because some are chocolate pudding, and some are just vanilla creme.” Paige wrinkled her nose. “Sorry, but vanilla creme is gross.”

  “Vanilla is gross, gotta agree. I’m more of a chocolate pudding with nuts kind of gal myself. Problem is I can’t find that kind of guy to save my life.” Her gaze locked on Rafe’s across the small space and she made no effort to lower her voice. “Any ideas?”

  “Yes. Stop looking and let him find you.” Paige waggled her eyebrows and rose to go contend with Colt, who was doing some kind of touchdown dance around the grill.

  Drake laughed and walked over to join them, leaving her and Rafe alone.

  “You’re playing with fire,” he murmured.

  She angled her head and licked her lips. A well-used ploy, but for good reason. His gaze dropped to her mouth and stayed there as she spoke. “That’s where you’re wrong. I’m not playing. Not anymore.”

  Sometime between when she’d flung her bikini top at Rafe’s face and blowing him on the blanket, she’d stopped thinking solely about scoring and started thinking about the bigger objective. Not consciously, of course. But somewhere in the back of her brain, she’d started to acknowledge some crucial truths.

  She didn’t just want sex out of him. They’d had sex once, and it had been a failure by most standards. But he’d come around again and stoked everything back to life and now she was curious about all that he was tamping down. And why.

  Curiosity killed librarians way more often than it killed pussycats.

  “You’re out of your league.”

  She didn’t bother tossing back another snarky comment. That was what they’d been doing since the beginning of time, and it was getting old.

  Instead she rose and walked over to join her family at the grill. She wasn’t waiting around to be the last one in line ever again.

  When she glanced back, Rafe was gone.

  9

  Rafe stood in the kitchen with a wrapped bowl of potato salad in his hands and stared out the back door. Everyone was clustered around the grill, talking and laughing. The minute Hollie’s attention had been occupied by the prospect of food, he’d sneaked off into the kitchen and taken potato salad out of the fridge that didn’t even belong to him.

  He’d spent weeks of his life in this kitchen. Hollie’s parents trusted him implicitly, so it wasn’t like they’d mind him digging into what they had in the refrigerator for their impromptu dinner. But he’d done it to avoid being out there for a few minutes, which made him a coward if not a thief.

  He wasn’t backing down anymore. For good or bad, he’d made up his mind to pursue this thing with Hollie. He just hadn’t expected them to be put on display right away first thing.

  Colt wasn’t the most astute when it came to ferreting out personal relationships, but if he saw something and mentioned it to Charli…

  That couldn’t happen. Not yet. He wasn’t sure what his end game was as far as Hol, and that meant giving himself—giving them—the time to get to know each other better in this new, much more intimate way. The week until the Valentine’s Day dance wasn’t enough time, and he didn’t know what the point was of that arbitrary deadline anyway. But they needed room on their own to explore without people watching and judging.

  Just a little while.

  He blew out a breath and gripped the potato salad that much tighter as he nudged the back door open with his hip. Hollie’s laughter was the first thing he heard.

  Loud and carefree. That was who she was. Every part of him yearned to be more like her, to just loosen the reins a little and give in. To not fucking compare himself in his head to a man who’d been dead a long time.

  A flawed man he’d still loved in spite of his many issues, but who was not him in any shape or form.

  He crossed the yard to them and set the potato salad down on the picnic table. If he had to replace it later, he’d have his mama make them her spicy version. They’d loved it the few times he’d brought
it to family gatherings.

  Gatherings he’d always been invited to, because from shortly after moving to Quinn, that’s what he’d been considered when it came to the Bennetts. Family.

  And family should never take advantage.

  His gaze connected with Hollie’s as she waited for Colt to load a burger onto her plate. Except more and more, he was beginning to see his pingpong routine as he tried to fight his feelings for her as more detrimental than just acknowledging the truth.

  He wanted Hollie Bennett. He always had.

  She joined him at the table and without a word, offered him half her burger. He took it and bit in, barely catching the escaping juices that ran down his chin.

  And damn if she didn’t lick her lips again.

  “As soon as they leave,” he murmured, and she nodded, so eagerly that his chest puffed up like a damn peacock’s.

  This time he wouldn’t hold back when they were together. He’d give her exactly what she asked for.

  The meal passed quickly. The wind had kicked up and it was definitely chillier than it had been earlier. Add in the darkness and the bugs and Paige was soon making noises about them being crazy to think tonight was a nice night to eat outside. Hollie was shivering in his shirt, and he was more than ready to warm her up.

  The others left not long after they finished eating. Hollie started to clean up, but he stilled her hand and pulled her with him inside, where it was warm and there was plenty of light.

  He brushed his fingers over her cheek and kissed her in the kitchen. Cupping her face, stroking her lips with his own before slipping his tongue inside. He was in no hurry now. They had all night, and he was going to take it.

  She stood up on her tiptoes to get more of his mouth, but she was still so far away. So he hoisted her up and she curled her legs around his hips as he walked backwards through the kitchen and the hall to the stairway that led to the second floor.

  He bumped into more than a few walls on the way, and nearly lost her more than once. Her mouth was so hungry, her kisses so desperate, that they fanned the flames inside himself he’d struggled for so long to keep in check. She was matching him in every sense.