by Rose Marini
“Wow, look at those beautiful rosebushes,” Allison exclaimed, pointing to a house on the left with massive yellow roses decorating the front.
“That reminds me, I noticed the flowers outside of your house. Did you plant them?”
“Oh, yeah, I planted them when I moved in a few months ago. My mom always had a huge garden at our house growing up, so I felt like the front of my house looked naked without them. Then I discovered that growing things really calms me. It’s like… maybe everything else is going wrong in my life—my grades aren’t good enough, I’m not walking Sammy enough, I haven’t talked to my friends or family recently, I haven’t done laundry in weeks—but at least I can keep these plants alive and make them look pretty.” She blushed. “That probably sounds dumb. I’m not that dysfunctional, I swear!”
“Not dumb at all. It makes total sense to me,” Emma said reasonably. “We all need things to keep us grounded. Mine has always been hiking. I actually come to the place I’m going to show you three or four times a week, just to get some exercise, away from the noise of the city and the ER… It’s probably my favorite place in the world.”
Allison smiled at her, saying softly, “I’m honored that you’re taking me there.”
Her sweet smile sent a shiver down Emma’s neck. Ignoring it, she grinned back and changed the subject, asking, “So what kind of plants do you like to grow?”
An enthusiastic light grew in Allison’s eyes as she responded, “Well, I mostly just grow annuals right now since I’ve been moving so often. It just doesn’t make sense to plant anything that’s going to last for longer than a year or two, at least not until I stop bouncing from place to place. But my all-time favorite flowers are called freesia.”
“Freesia? I don’t think I’ve heard of them.”
“They’re just these really… happy-looking flowers. White and pink are the most common, but there are yellow and red varieties too. The best part, though, is that they smell absolutely incredible.”
“Interesting, I’ll have to keep an eye out for them,” Emma commented.
“Maybe I’ll buy you some sometime,” Allison said as she gave Emma a suggestive sidelong glance that sent a flush of anticipation through the other woman. Allison laughed inside; it was adorable how flustered Emma became when Allison flirted with her.
A short drive and brisk hike led them to a secluded lake lined with trees. Leaves whispered gently in the crisp breeze; the sun shifted in a dappled pattern across the forest floor. Birdsong formed a joyful melody around them. A hint of wet earth and green things trickled through the air. Allison turned her face to the sun, reveling in the warmth on her skin.
Emma watched her, entranced. The sun’s rays highlighted notes of caramel and amber in Allison’s hair. The shining curls perfectly framed her face, skin lightly flushed from the hike. Her lips parted slightly as she gave herself over to the call of nature. After what felt like several sunlit hours to Emma, Allison’s dark lashes fluttered as she opened her eyes. Her heart stuttered as she noticed Emma’s eyes on her. They showed wonder, and longing, and something else Allison couldn’t quite identify. This time Emma was the one to move closer, raising her hand to cradle Allison’s face in her hand, one thumb grazing the soft skin of her cheek. Allison held perfectly still, partly in anticipation and partly to avoid scaring Emma off. Emma hesitated for a breath, then leaned in. Their kiss was slow and deep, meandering like a lazy stream crossing a meadow. Emma sighed as their bodies fitted together.
Suddenly a thought struck her, and she drew away. “I was just wondering,” Emma stammered. “You said you were nervous about dating again after what happened last time. Are you nervous about me, about this?”
Allison’s lips curved into a crooked smile that sent a twinge of need through Emma’s core. “Not at all, Em. This feels… right. Like settling into a comfy chair with a mug of tea, a new book, a soft blanket, and a dog curled up at my feet. Comfortable, and easy, and…” Here she shook her head. “I can’t find the right words for it. But do you know what I mean?”
Emma knew exactly what she meant. It was the same sensation that caused every cell in her body to chorus of course, of course, the last time they had kissed. Unable to come up with a suitable response to such a lovely sentiment, Emma simply pulled her back into their kiss, pressing as much of their bodies together as possible. Their passion mounted, sparked by roving hands and fervent kisses. A distant part of Allison’s brain noticed the difference between Emma’s hesitancy during their first kiss and her hungry, desperate embrace today. The smaller woman pulled away, a mischievous grin on her face. Emma almost whimpered at her withdrawal.
“I’m hot,” she announced, “and the water looks so tempting.”
Locking eyes with Emma, she drew her athletic tank top over her head, slowly revealing a toned stomach. A few freckles smattered her tan skin, drawing Emma’s eyes up her torso. The air escaped her lungs as she glimpsed the curve of Allison’s chest through the fabric of the white sports bra. Smirking internally at Emma’s open mouth, Allison looked at her innocently, saying, "What? I don't want to get my shirt all wet; it'll take forever to dry out!"
Emma swallowed and willed her voice to sound normal. "Uh, that makes sense..."
Allison grinned at her, then splashed into the lake. She surfaced a moment later, gasping. The water plastered her dark hair against her head and her cheeks were glowing from the cold. Shivering, she scrambled out of the water. Emma was transfixed; the water had turned her bra almost entirely sheer. She licked her lips, eyes drinking in the sight of Allison’s swollen nipples atop the swell of her breasts and the soaked fabric clinging to the curve of her hips and thighs. Allison bit her lip and looked at her anxiously, hoping she hadn’t gone too far. Her nervousness was replaced with desire as she registered the craving on Emma’s face. She moved forward to stand in front of the dazed woman, who made a convulsive movement as if to touch her but withdrew at the last moment. Allison held still. She needed to be certain Emma wanted this. She also knew that for Emma to become comfortable with her feelings, she needed to take ownership of them.
As if in a trance, Emma slowly traced her fingertips over the wet shorts clinging to the brown skin encompassing Allison’s muscular thigh and up her bare stomach, hesitating at the edge of her chest. She glanced up at Allison, whose eyes were closed as she focused on the heat of Emma’s fingertips. She completed the same path on Allison’s other side until both hands were wrapped around Allison’s ribs, just underneath the curve of her breasts. Tentatively, she brushed her thumbs across the bottom of her mounds, eliciting a sharp inhale of breath from Allison. A rush of energy, centered between her legs, rolled through Emma’s core at the sound. Emboldened, she inched her hands upward and spread her fingers across Allison’s chest, kneading her flesh. Allison let out a ragged moan and leaned forward, pressing her mounds into the other woman’s exquisite touch. Neither woman noticed the time passing as Emma fully explored Allison’s body, alternating between soft, light strokes and strong—almost rough—palpitations of her arms, stomach, and chest. Her lips trailed across the sensitive skin on Allison’s neck, unaware of the sparks fizzing across Allison’s body with each kiss.
Nearly delirious with desire, Emma ravished the soft swell of Allison’s stomach and heavy weight of her breasts. Allison was oblivious to everything aside from Emma’s touch; the warmth of her hands contrasted perfectly with the coolness of her own wet clothes. She gasped as Emma grasped her hips firmly and pulled her closer, causing Allison to step up onto the rock between their feet. The height of the rock upon which she perched placed Emma eye level with Allison’s chest. As soon as she was within reach, Emma buried her face in between them, pressing her lips to the sopping fabric. She dimly noted the earthy taste of the lake and the blazing heat of Allison’s skin underneath the dampness. She planted gentle kisses over the swell of first one breast, then the other, spurred on by Allison’s intermittent sighs. Finally, she worked her way to the center and en
veloped her nipple between her lips, eliciting Allison’s loudest moan yet. Each of her moans sent a bolt of desire straight to the heat building between Emma’s legs. She flicked her tongue back and forth across her nipple, feeling it harden further underneath the rough grain of the fabric. Gently, she scraped her teeth over the sensitive tip. Allison shivered, overwhelmed by the sensation. Emma gave her other breast the same treatment; unadulterated pleasure overwhelmed the smaller woman. Just as the attention to her nipple became too much, Emma removed her mouth and palmed her mounds, massaging them firmly. Allison’s head spun, aroused by this new dominant side of Emma.
"Off," Allison said, her voice husky, reaching down to tug at the fabric of Emma’s shirt. Emma didn't hesitate, pulling the t-shirt over her head and letting it fall to the earth. Allison tugged down the other woman’s athletic shorts, her eyes raking over every inch of Emma’s skin, from the light freckles on her shoulder, down the curves of her legs, and up to the small patch of curly hair peeking around the edge of her underwear. She swallowed and reached out to stroke Emma’s waist, marveling at the softness of her pale skin.
An earsplitting whistle interrupted their reverie; Sammy barked in response as the voice of another hiker calling his dog emerged from the woods behind them. Both women had forgotten where they were, lost in their desire for each other. Allison giggled at Emma’s consternation as they rushed to throw their clothes back on.
“Oh my god, what if he saw us?!” she whisper-yelled to Allison.
Allison smirked. “He probably appreciated the show,” she responded, amused by Emma’s wide eyes. They finished gathering their things and headed back down the trail, Sammy loping in front of them. He had clearly taken advantage of the women’s distraction and found a mud puddle; Allison shook her head as she lamented the bath he would require once they reached home.
She had chattered at Sammy for a few minutes before noticing Emma’s uncharacteristic silence. Shooting a sideways glance at her companion, she glimpsed tight set lips and narrowed brows. Her heart sank. “Em? Is everything okay? Or are we moving too fast?”
The sound of Allison’s wavering voice brought Emma back to the present. She put off her response by pretending to focus on navigating a rocky section of the trail. After a minute or so, she sighed and said, “No, no, it’s not that. I guess it’s just that my whole life I’ve been ashamed of how I felt about certain women and have desperately tried to hide it from everyone I knew. I’ve spent so long burying these feelings and living in constant fear of anyone guessing how I felt. So… I think I’m just… really, really paranoid about people finding out, even strangers.”
She glanced sideways at Allison, whose expression was unreadable. “It’s not that I’m ashamed of you, or of whatever this is,” she said hurriedly as she gestured between them. “I’m just… trying to overcome twenty years of habits.”
Allison took her hand and squeezed it. “You know, most people don’t think it’s a big deal anymore, at least not in most parts of the country. Things are so much better than they were twenty years ago.”
Emma was silent; she knew that. Unfortunately, she also knew that her family and church—hell, most of the people she had known her entire life—weren’t exactly accepting. Not even close. Actually, they were the people who protested events like Pride Marches.
Unaware of Emma’s tortured thoughts, Allison continued, “But I completely understand, it takes time to figure out and get comfortable with your feelings and identity.”
Pushing aside those forbidding thoughts, Emma tried to smile, comforted against her will by Allison’s support and the gentle pressure of her hand.
As the weeks passed, Allison grew more confident in her ability as a physician and her relationship with Emma. Their time together, while limited due to Allison’s study schedule, was a much-needed break from the stress of the emergency room. They toured coffee shops, studied, and walked Sammy together. Emma finally introduced her to Sarah, a move Allison saw as very promising. As Emma expected, Allison and Sarah warmed to each other immediately. Most importantly, they fell back into the close friendship they had once cherished so deeply. Although both had changed since their college years—Allison became more self-assured, Emma more outgoing—their core personalities remained as compatible as ever.
All of this confidence deserted Allison at a most crucial juncture. She frantically threw clothes onto her bed, picking up and discarding various outfits. She finally settled on an oversized flannel and leggings, comfortable but still cute. And classically gay, of course. Sammy watched her curiously as she scurried around to open a bottle of red wine and light the many candles she scattered around the kitchen and living room. Soft indie music drifted over the speakers. She had invited Emma over for dinner and a movie; this would be Emma’s first time spending the night at Allison’s house and Allison hoped she would appreciate the romantic setting. Their last date had ended with hungry, desperate kisses in an alleyway outside Emma’s apartment. Since then, Allison had been driven mad by the memory of rough bricks pressing into her back while Emma’s hands explored her body, her lips teasing feather-light kisses on Allison’s neck. It had taken every ounce of self-control she possessed to interrupt their embrace, although she had been gratified by Emma’s clear look of disappointment as she pulled away. She was determined to take things slowly, however, especially after Emma’s reaction at the lake. The last thing she wanted was to scare her off by moving too quickly.
The doorbell rang, interrupting her thoughts. She and Sammy bounded to the door. Emma, clad in a simple black tank and jeans, held out a bouquet of red roses mixed with orange and yellow freesia.
“I thought they fit the fall season,” she said shyly, a sweet grin curving her pink lips.
Allison was momentarily speechless. “Em, I can’t believe you remembered! I love them. Thank you so much.” Allison thought her smile would split her face in half.
“Of course. You were right, they do smell amazing.”
“Come on in.”
Allison turned and Emma followed her inside, immediately crouching to scratch Sammy’s stomach as his tail thumped the floor.
Laughing, Allison rolled her eyes. “Sammy, you’re shameless. Don’t forget who feeds you!” she warned the pup. “I think you might have replaced me as his favorite person,” she commented dryly to Emma.
Emma laughed and followed her into the house. After a brief tour, Allison led her into the kitchen where Emma sniffed appreciatively.
“It smells amazing, Ally! What’re you making?”
Allison’s eyes sparkled. “Well, since you asked,” she said with a flourish, unveiling a platter of bruschetta. “Have an appetizer. Bruschetta with some fresh mozzarella from Ben’s favorite local cheese guy. Then for our first course, we’re having a pear, walnut, and arugula salad. Next is steak with a red wine and mushroom sauce, Brussel sprouts with garlic and bacon, and twice-baked potatoes. And then brownies from a box and ice cream for dessert, because I got lazy after all that cooking.”
Touched, Emma stepped closer and said quietly, “That sounds incredible, Ally. You didn’t need to do all this for me! But thank you for doing all this for me.” She cradled Ally’s cheek in her palm and pressed their lips together, conveying her gratitude and joy through their kiss. She stepped forward, pushing Allison back against the counter and tracing her lips down her tan neck. Both women were breathing hard when they finally broke apart.
Allison curled her arms tighter around Emma, murmuring in her ear, “Thank you for the flowers. They’re beautiful.” Here she kissed Emma’s cheek and pulled away, heading toward the kitchen table. “And they’ll be the perfect centerpiece for us!” she added as she rearranged the candles on the table around the vase.
They enjoyed a quiet dinner, their conversation ranging from hospital gossip to politics. Emma cemented herself as Sammy’s favorite person when she slipped him a few steak scraps under the table. She laughed at Allison’s mock-disapproving face and joked,
gesturing towards his eager face. “What? Someone needs to spoil him! Clearly you never even feed him.”
“Fine, well if you’re going to give him treats at least make him work for it. Sammy, roll over.” The scruffy pup rolled over gleefully, then popped up to accept his reward. Allison led him through a series of tricks; Emma laughed and cheered as he shook her hand, bowed, played dead, and danced on his hind legs.
After they finished their meal, Emma insisted on helping Allison clean up. An enticing tension hung in the air; both women found excuses to touch each other as they crossed the kitchen. Emma managed to find a second bottle of wine for them in the process. Glasses full, they flopped on the couch and Allison inquired, “What do you want to watch? I haven’t rented anything yet because I wasn’t sure what kind of movies you like. I mean, I assume you still like romantic comedies given that we watched about a thousand of them in college, but you never know…”
Emma laughed, remembering the innumerable evening they had spent curled up on the couch in her apartment, re-watching their favorite romcoms. “Well you assume correctly, but I’m up for whatever you want! What genre do you have in mind?”
“In that case, I was thinking maybe one of the classics?”
Emma interrupted her, exclaiming, “Me too! But, okay, don’t judge me for this, but I’ve actually never seen Dirty Dancing.”
“Oh my god, I’m totally judging you and also we can’t date anymore,” Allison deadpanned. “How can you claim to be a fan of the classics and not have seen this movie?”
Emma hung her head in mock shame. “I know, I know, I’m terrible.”
“Well, that answers that question! Dirty Dancing it is,” Allison commented, already navigating to the movie. She inched closer to Emma on the couch, nervous but aching to touch her. Emma shifted towards her, settling her head onto Allison’s shoulder and sighing contentedly. Allison wrapped an arm around her, marveling at her good fortune. Nineteen-year-old Allison never would’ve imagined that she would be cuddling with the woman of her dreams. Distracted by Emma’s warmth and gentle hand stroking her leg, she barely registered the scenes flashing across the screen.