She gets totally into the song, dancing and egging on the crowd to join her when the chorus comes on. A few minutes later, she finishes off with Cass and I in the background singing, “they just wanna…”
Okay, so when we started off, I wanted to cry. However, after the enthusiasm Ade showed, and getting the crowd involved, I totally got into it. When the song was over there was a chorus of hoots and howls. It was pretty amazing. We walk through the crowd with people congratulating us. When we make it to the table we see all three of the guys clapping and cheering.
“Adriana, I knew you could sing, but not for real sing,” Kip confesses.
“There’s a lot you don’t know about me.” She smirks at him. “Alright boys, it’s your turn.”
“Wait,” I interrupt, “Where in god’s name did you come up with ‘Ade and the Tillettes’?”
“Well silly, I’m Ade.” I roll my eyes at her sarcasm, “And your last name is Tillson. Cass works for Tillson, so Tillettes made sense.”
“You’re a certified genius,” Cass says dryly.
“I know, I really am.” She focuses her attention back to the guys, “Enough chit chatter, boys it’s your turn—before the band comes back on.”
“I’m sorry, what?” Drew stutters out.
“Did you really think we were going to go up there and you all wouldn’t have to?” Cass jumps in.
“Yeah, did you?” I add.
“Well…yeah,” Drew confesses.
“Don’t be such pussies; let’s go show them what we’re made of, guys.” Jax puts his beer down on the table. Kip and Drew shake their head, and follow Jax in his bright blue pants walking up to the stage before the band begins setting up again. “Excuse me everybody,” Jax raises his hands to the crowd. “Although those three beautiful ladies put on a great performance, we had to show them we can rock out, too.” The crowd starts clapping and cheering again. “I’m Jax, this is Drew, and this,” he points to my brother, “is Kip. Are you ready for a treat—Top Gun style?” He turns around to look at my brother and my boyfriend, and then nods. “We’ll be singing…You’ve Lost that Loving Feeling.”
Uproar ensues at his announcement. The music starts to play. Jax turns serious, “You never close your eyes…”
I sit in amazement at how Jax commands the stage. For all of his goofiness, and blatant “charm”, he’s actually a great performer. The boys in the background are singing, “Baby, I beg you…”
The crowd sways back and forth joining in on the song as well. It ends shortly after with more hoots and hollers. Jax being, well…Jax, takes a bow. Laughing, they all walk back towards our table. They too, were stopped in the midst of walking back to us. The three of us girls are—among everyone else—clapping and smiling.
“Boom! And that’s how it’s done.”
“Jax, you weren’t half bad,” Cass toys with him.
“Half bad? Woman, I made that stage my bitch.”
Kip clears his throat as Drew sits back down beside me grinning. “Yes and of course with the help of them,” he adds. “I can’t take all of the credit.”
“You bet your ass you can’t,” Kip adds.
“You were okay,” Ade goads him.
“Okay? I don’t think you were paying—”
My mouth drops open in shock. In fact, all of our mouths drop open in shock. Ade shuts him up by kissing him. Kissing my brother. My eyes register shock when my gaze moves to Drew.
“Ha. Totally called it months ago.”
When they break away from their kiss, Ade straightens up. Kip leans his arms around the back of chair nonchalantly; Cass is beaming.
“Called what, brother?” Drew asks.
“You don’t remember the first time we came here as a group and I asked how long have they’d been into each other?”
Oh. My. God. I remember that. Since he’s painted the picture, I recall all of it, including the surprise looks on their faces when he mentioned it back then also.
“So, how long have you two been together?” Drew asks.
“Yes. Do tell,” I speak up.
Ade looks at me frantically. “Mackenzie, it just happened this week. Technically we’re not ‘together’ just getting to know each other. Please don’t be mad.”
Her eyes plead to me from across the table; silence falls waiting for my response. Floating in the air is more music from a different era. Kip sits forward and leans his forearms on the table.
“Honestly? I think this is great!” I hear a sigh of relief come from everyone. “Why would I be mad? You two already act like a married couple anyway. Am I shocked? Maybe a little, but I’m happy if you’re both happy.”
Drew swings his left arm around me and pulls me towards him whispering in my ear, “I think that’s the answer they both needed to hear from you.”
“What are you two whispering about?” Kip calls out, taking a swig from his beer.
“If you must know,” Drew speaks up. “I was telling your sister how much I love her.”
I stifle a giggle.
“Aren’t they just adorable?” Cass’s hazel eyes light up. “I mean just look at them.”
“Babe, you know you could be that happy too, right?” Jax adjusts his posture so he’s sitting comfortably against the back of his chair.
Cass glances at him. “Is that right?” Her blonde eyebrow rises. “How so?”
“Oh, I thought I was being obvious.” He winks at me and turns his attention back to her. “By being with me of course. If you haven’t noticed, I am a pretty good time.”
She rolls her eyes and focuses her attention back to our table. With everyone’s response being what it usually is when he’s around—laughter.
AS THE HOURS tick by, the best of the eighties continues to play, and midnight is quickly approaching. “New Year’s resolutions anyone?” Cass asks the table. “I’ll even go first.” We all wait for her to start it off. “My New Year’s resolution is to be more open minded about people. To not judge a book by its cover, if you will.”
Jax lets out a quick and excited ‘yes’ in response.
“My resolution is to be more forgiving of people. To think before I act,” Kip says glancing at Drew. It’s pretty clear to understand exactly what he’s trying to say.
“My resolution is to accept that some things can’t be changed. But, to deal with it and move on,” Ade chimes in. A brief wave of sadness displays across her face. Kip rubs her back in a gesture of comfort. When she looks to him, he smiles.
“My resolution is to take care of the things and people important to me—to always be upfront about everything.” Drew looks at me apologetically.
I shake my head and rub his cheek with my thumb. There’s no need for him to apologize to me anymore.
“Well, my resolution is to keep moving forward. When situations knock me down, not let it get the best of me. To never shut down, and shut out my family and friends.” I eye them all individually, the unspoken promise in each gaze I hold across the table.
“Do we always save the best for last?” Jax speaks up. God, I hope he never changes. “My resolution is to continue being the wonderfully charming and amazing person I am today. It’s hard work, but somebody’s gotta do it.” He takes a swig of his beer as we all boo him.
Grabbing the champagne glasses, going around the bar to toast the beginning of a new year, Cass announces clapping, “Final countdown guys!”
“10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1…Happy New Year!”
We all raise the glasses of champagne and toast. I set mine down and press my lips to Drew’s. The bar’s going crazy with cheers and clinking cups together in celebration. Confetti, courtesy of the bar, is being thrown everywhere as well.
“I can’t think of a better way to ring in a new year,” I say against his lips.
He cups my face, pressing his forehead to mine. “Sweetheart, I couldn’t agree more.” We turn our heads at the same time to see Kip kissing Ade and…Jax kissing Cass?
B
ringing my attention back to Drew, I say, “This is definitely going to be an interesting year.”
He chuckles, “It certainly will be.”
He moves the hair off of my face, the corners of his eyes crinkle, and his row of white teeth flash at me. Those pale green eyes, the very ones that use to haunt me when he left, are now focused solely on me.
All of those years not knowing if I would ever see him again, all of the days I spent daydreaming of a life with him seems to have come true—I don’t have to wonder anymore. Fate has a funny way of showing its gratitude. Sometimes, living through ones absolute worst, gives the appreciation needed for when the best comes around.
Everything I had to face up to this point was the true test. There’s no way I could’ve ever known the true meaning of happiness without having experienced true sadness; my true sadness. It may have not been much of a hurdle for someone else, like say, Jax maybe, but for me? Constant nagging doubts have a way of seeding into a person’s subconscious. We missed out on so much with each other, but I wouldn’t change a thing. Not one single argument, or one single insecurity; not even the heartbreak and betrayal that started it all. I am who I am today because of that very reason. It’s shaped me into exactly who I need to be.
It was a long road to find myself and to find happiness, but I know now, it comes when it’s least expected. Until I was able to accept my faults and love myself, could I be the woman Andrew Trey Dean deserved to have.
AS THE COMMOTION of people continues around me, I stare at the woman sitting right next to me—crystal blue eyes keeping me captivated. This once broken woman, who had no faith in herself or her capabilities, was able to overcome all of that. The lost years we had can never be replaced, but we found each other again and that’s what’s most important.
Little Kennie’s all grown up and I know, as I study her, she’s the one. Even when I tried to pacify my feelings, and keep my head in my ass all of those years ago, deep down I knew. I knew Kennie was mine. She was always meant to be mine. And she’ll continue to always be mine.
“Drew?”
“Yeah?”
“I love you,” she says leaning in, close to my ear so I can hear her.
“Say it again?”
“I love you.”
“One more time?”
“I. Love. You,” I hear her giggle.
“Forever, Kennie. I’ll love you, forever.”
NEW YEAR’S DAY. I’m a bundle of fucking nerves. Last night, ringing in the New Year was my best one to date—sans singing on stage. I had originally planned on doing this today anyway, but after the Christmas debacle, I was going to rework my plans. Jax being Jax, told me to stop being a pussy and get on with it. Kennie’s home now, but will be here soon. I look over the pictures hanging down our hallway wall one last time. My brother helped me put them up late last night. I spoke with Kennie’s mom a couple of weeks back and asked her for a few pictures I’d missed out on in the time we were apart. She gladly handed some over.
Two frames, side by side every few feet down our hallway, is the story of us. To make sure she sees them, Jax and I placed little lights above each set of pictures. From childhood, to the last time I saw her, to our years of separation, lastly landing on us together all of those years ago when a stranger captured something deep down I’ve always known. She was the one.
I hear a knock on my door and call out for her to come in. I stand at the end of the hallway when she walks in wearing some light jeans and a red sweater. She’s never looked more beautiful. She looks at me standing at the end and cocks her head to the side.
“What’re you doing all the way down there?” When I shrug my shoulders she smiles and starts to walk towards me. Noticing the dark hallway with only dimly lit up frames she stops. “How did you…” she trails off, and continues walking.
The next set she stops at, she touches the pictures. Silently studying each set walking closer to me and pausing to soak it all in. When she reaches the last set, she turns to me with tears in her eyes.
“What is all of this?” she breathes out.
“It’s the story of us.”
“I’m not sure I understand.” She takes a finger and wipes at her eye. At the same time, I bend down on one knee and open the little box that holds the ring I picked out for her. She gasps and raises both of her hands to her mouth.
“Kennie, I love you. I’ll always love you. You were made to be mine, you were created for me. Every time I look at you, I’m so thankful I didn’t miss the happiness that only you have brought into my life. You’re my everything, my first true love, my soul mate, my forever. Will you please do me the honor of being my wife?”
The tears stream down her face.
“Yes! The answer is yes.” Shakily, she holds out her left hand. I slip the ring on.
A chorus of “Congratulations!” beams out from my and Jax’s respective bedrooms. My parents, Kennie’s parents, Kip, Ade, Cass and of course Jax, come out all smiles. They hug us both with all of the girls crying excitedly.
“You all were in on it?” Kennie asks, stunned.
Various yes’ are called out. The girls squeal over the ring and Jax strolls over to me, clapping me on the back, he says, “How embarrassed would you have been if she’d said no?”
Two Years Later…
LIFE. IT’S WHAT you make of it, isn’t it? If that is indeed the case, then my life is amazing, superb, extraordinary, loving, exciting, inspirational, beautiful, special, insanely fulfilling…and so much more. These past couples of years have brought more happiness than I ever thought possible.
I think back to the New Year’s that gave me my fresh start, and smile. I truly believe the happiest moments in a person’s life, can always be recalled with ease because of the impact it’s made.
What we both didn’t know all of those years ago, was that finding me on a swing set, upset over something so childish—would mark the first of many memorable moments for us as children, as friends, and eventually, in the distant future, as lovers.
Had I been asked any time before in my life if I believed in such a thing as soul mates, I probably would’ve said no. Don’t get me wrong; I live for people to have their happy fairy tale endings. To have that epic apology kiss in the rain, or the guy who surprises his girlfriend with a house full of flowers, or the guy who remembers things he was told on a first date not thinking it will be of any importance later—I want that for everyone. Everyone deserves to smile for no reason, or have butterflies at the thought of the special someone in their life, or better yet, to grow old with someone who literally stuck by them through thick and thin. To have the forty or fifty years’ worth of stories to pass on to the grandkids, to be the example that true love does exist.
In the real world, it’s the few and far betweens that get us by. I’m one of the fortunate ones. I get to live out my perfect fairy tale and make new memories with the one I love every day.
To add to my incessant bliss—the package deal I got with Jax as a brother-in-law. We’ve become so much closer than we already were. I still have the luxury of dealing with his witty and ‘charming’ remarks, but I’ve also gotten to know a different side of him. We’re neighbors still, but now, Drew and I live together and Jax is on his own. He’s a highlight in my life for sure.
About a year ago, he finally worked up the courage to tell me his entire story; the one Drew said wasn’t his to tell. I listened, I laughed and I cried—a lot. He’s overcome so much, and to be the kind of person he is today is a testament to his strength. He and Cass make an interesting couple; maybe wedding bells will become a part of their story. That thought makes me giggle.
Kip and Ade are an entirely different story, though. A whirlwind of patience tried daily is what they are. No one knows what will become of them as a couple. The strong personalities between the two could possibly be their demise. Neither one knows when to say when, but interestingly enough, only with each other. In a perfect world, my kind of dysfunctional famil
y will find as much happiness as I have.
Reminiscing, in one of my favorite spots in the world, I do what I always do when I come here. I write.
When I was a child, and I looked at myself
I saw the sun shining
Rainbows claiming the sky,
Beautiful colors, vibrant and full of life.
I saw the promise of tomorrow
The hope for a bright future,
I saw the love of a family who
Held my hand when I was scared;
Who always told me everything was going to be alright.
When I would fall?
They would be there to pick me up
To comfort me in my time of need no matter the
Cost to their plans, their sacrifices, or their time.
When I was a child and I looked at myself
I saw the eagerness of another day spent in class.
The joy of standing in the lunch line
The fun of spending those thirty minutes with friends;
To catch up the day’s events
Stories about boys, stories about lives that didn’t hold as
Much love as I saw for myself.
When I would go home and look at myself
I would count the blessings I had each and every day.
Because some weren’t as lucky to have
What I had.
To have a mother to tell you she was proud.
A father to tell you you were his little girl.
And then… the years passed.
Friendships faded, new ones were formed.
When I looked at myself,
I realized I had grown, that the eyes that shone so bright
Had seemed to become a little…dimmer.
The rainbows that once colored the sky
Had seemed to become a little…duller.
I had learned lessons.
Bonds were broken, friendships severed.
When I looked at myself I realized
I no longer recognized
Ending a Broken Journey Page 31