Doing My Own Thing

by Nikki Carter

  Don’t wait up for her? Oh, I see she really thinks that she’s grown! She better be glad that I trust her not to do anything stupid or else she’d be on lockdown, house arrest, and all of the above.

  But for real, though! I’m so happy my mother is smiling. She might just get that husband she’s been waiting for all my life!

  And Dreya . . . wow to her and her toxic relationship. I’m going to just do me. Go to New York, get my 106 & Park on, release my video, and strive to be number one. I just hope that when I make it, I can look to the right of me and my sister-cousin will be there by my side.

  Without her raggedy boyfriend.

  32

  I thought I was nervous the last time I was on 106 & Park, but this time I’m dang near mortified. We’re premiering both videos today on the show and the viewers are going to pick which one gets put into rotation. Mystique told me that no matter which video the fans choose, Epsilon Records has already selected video number one. It seems they liked the kiss too. Apparently, Mystique is the only one who had a problem with it.

  I’m backstage on the set and I hear the crowd going crazy. Then I start tripping because I realize that the screaming is for me! There’s nobody here with me, it’s me doing my own thing—Sunday Tolliver, pop star.

  Sam is with me, because, well, he lives in New York City now. Zac had offered his own crib to Sam while he was getting settled, but Sam insisted on getting his own spot. He didn’t want to seem like one of Zac’s entourage. I like that in him.

  “You look good, Sunday,” Sam says as he runs a hand over my high ponytail.

  “It’s okay? I don’t look too teenybopper?” I ask. I’m feeling some kind of way about this ponytail, and I can’t say that it’s a good feeling.

  “Who do you hear out there screaming but a bunch of teens? It’s okay if you look teenybopper, because that’s what they are.”

  “Rocsi’s talking now! It’s almost time for me to go on.”

  On stage, Rocsi says, “Today we’ve got a special treat! We’ve got Mystical Sounds recording artist Sunday Tolliver here in the studio! She’s going to introduce her brand-new video. Her album drops tomorrow, so make sure you go and cop that!”

  On cue, one of the show’s producers holds up a hand to me to let me know I’ve got three minutes.

  “You’ll do great out there, and then we can go out to lunch or something.”

  “Really? Where are you taking me?”

  “I was thinking about Sylvia’s in Harlem. I’m in the mood for some soul food.”

  “Listen to us, making lunch dates and stuff like grown folks.”

  Sam laughs out loud. “We are grown aren’t we?”

  “I guess so. But I don’t feel grown. I feel like my mama can come and bust all this up at any time and put my butt on punishment.”

  “I know, right?” Sam says. “When I told my mother I was moving to New York, she did put me on punishment. Then she changed her mind when I told her I was going to be making close to six figures a year and a royalty percentage.”

  “That’s really good coming out the gate, Sam. Most eighteen-year-olds aren’t making that kind of money.”

  “Well, most eighteen-year-olds don’t have an investment broker either. I’m not playing games, Sunday. When we graduate college, I want us to have a life together.”

  I give Sam my big wide-eyed blank stare. “After we graduate college? I can’t even think past next week, let alone four years from now.”

  “But I’m a planner, that’s what I do. I just want you to know that I’m planning for us.”

  I gulp and hope Sam doesn’t hear me or see the fear in my eyes. Why would he lay this on me right before I go out on stage? We just got to solid boyfriend/girlfriend status and now Sam wants to skip to forever? He stays on fast-forward, but he wouldn’t be Sam if he didn’t.

  When the producer gives me the signal to go onstage, Sam squeezes my hand. It feels like something a fiancé would do. I shudder at the thought of it, feel myself getting cold feet, cold toes, and every other frozen extremity.

  I’m walking in a daze, and now Rocsi has a microphone in my face. “So Sunday, you shot the video for ‘Can U See Me’ in Barbados? That’s extra hot for a first video!”

  “Yeah, it was incredible! We had so much fun.”

  “And you didn’t just film a video, you filmed a reality show too, right?”

  I nod. “Yes, the first episode of it is tonight on BET at nine o’clock!”

  “Tell us, is there going to be lots of drama?”

  I laugh out loud. “Yes, my cousin is on the show.”

  The crowd and Rocsi burst into laughter. “Your cousin does have an appropriate name, right?”

  More laughter and cheers from the crowd. And someone yells, “I love you, Sunday!”

  “I love you BACK!” I say in the microphone.

  Rocsi laughs some more. “So there’s something special going on with this video premiere, right? Tell the fans about it.”

  “Well, we actually shot two videos and we want the fans to pick the one you like the best. That’s the one going into rotation on BET.”

  “I’ve seen them both, and they’re hot! And isn’t . . . isn’t that the guy from the YouTube video playing your leading man? Is he your boyfriend?”

  I smile. “Now, Rocsi, you know I don’t talk about my personal life at all.”

  “Mystique has taught you well, I see.”

  “She is my mentor, you know.”

  “Well, Sunday, go ahead and announce your video!”

  I take the microphone from her hand and say, “First, I want to give a shout-out to one of my fans. Her name is Zoey and she was going through a breakup when she heard this song. Zoey, I hope everything is going well for you. Whether you have a new guy or not, you are still super fab in my book! I’m dedicating this video premiere to you. This is both versions of ‘Can U See Me’! I hope you enjoy it.”

  Both videos play on the big screens, and the crowd goes wild. Seeing it larger than life is a heart-stopping moment for me! And I just want to disappear when everyone hoots as Sam kisses me on-screen. I hope they can’t tell that I’m blushing, because all the evasiveness in the world won’t be enough if I’m red as a firecracker when the lights go back up.

  After the video plays, Rocsi says, “Right after the break, Sunday is gonna sing her single ‘Inbox Me’ live!”

  Backstage I drink a warm bottled water and take a potty break before it’s time for me to sing. Even though “Inbox Me” is not my favorite track off the album, I still plan to rock it all the way live.

  When I hit the stage again, all nervousness and embarrassment about being kissed on-screen is gone and it’s all about the performance. All about hitting the right notes, all about making it hot.

  Because that’s what I do. I make it hot!

  I hear the intro play and I start singing, “Inbox me/Don’t want everyone to know-ow-ow/Inbox me/Get up on this dance floor/Inbox me/Don’t leave it on my wall/Inbox me/You don’t even have to call . . .”

  This is my first radio single, and although it didn’t quite make it to number one on the chart, it did break the top five, which is fabulous for a newcomer like me! I told them that “Can U See Me” was a better single, but Epsilon chose to listen to Mystique instead.

  We’ll see who’s right when “Can U See Me” hits number one on the Billboard charts. And I know it will! With the reality show and two hot videos to back it up, this song is going straight to the top.

  And my career is going with it! Sunday Tolliver—chart topper! It has a great ring to it. No . . . it has a fab ring to it!

  33

  EPSILON RECORDING ARTIST DRAMA GETS BEAT-DOWN IN THE HOOD (pictures inside).

  I blink rapidly as I read the Mediatakeout.com headline. I’m afraid to click the link. How could they have pictures? Who would do that?

  But curiosity gets the best of me and I do click the link. The picture is bad. It’s really, really bad. It had to hav
e been taken right after those girls jumped on Dreya. And the only place she went was to the police station.

  The story reads:

  Epsilon Recording artist Drama was jacked outside her Atlanta apartment two weeks ago. Snitches say that it is related to her ongoing beef with ex-boyfriend Truth, who was dropped from Epsilon Records after one album release— for mysterious reasons. The pictures were sent to us from an anonymous e-mail account with a message for Drama. Epsilon money can’t protect you every day of your life. Watch your back, Drama. . . . We coming for you. If anyone has any information on the goons that did this to one of our favorite new artists, please call the Atlanta police department. And we’re praying for you, Ma!

  Before I can read the article a second time my cell phone rings.

  “Hello.”

  “Did you see it?” It’s Mystique.

  “Yeah, I saw it. It’s bad. Dreya looks a mess in that picture.”

  Mystique says, “I know. She’s gonna have a coronary.”

  “What should she do? Should she respond? Should she stay quiet? And what about the threat? Do you think that’s real?” I ask a flurry of questions that suddenly occur to me.

  “I think the threat is fake,” Mystique says. “No matter how mad Truth is, he knows he can’t mess up in the industry. There could be a lot of reasons why he got dropped from Epsilon. Nobody knows it’s because Zac requested it.”

  “Zac got him dropped? Wow. I didn’t know he liked Dreya all that much.”

  Mystique says, “I think it was more about Dilly than Dreya. He thinks that Dilly can go far, but that Epsilon needs to put more money behind him. Plus, Truth’s album sales were just okay. The only hit song on the record was the one with your hook. It had a lukewarm response.”

  “So, just like that? One bad album release and you’re out the door?”

  “Yeah, Sunday. You didn’t know? You’re only as hot as your next project. If your first project sucks, then there won’t be a number two. It’s called a one-hit wonder.”

  “That’s messed up.”

  “But you don’t have to worry about that.”

  “Really? Why don’t I?”

  “Your SoundScan numbers for your first-week sales were 578,000. You went gold your first week! And your album debuted at number three on the Billboard pop chart!”

  I almost drop the phone! “Get the heck out of here! So, I’m a millionaire!”

  “Pretty much, baby! Welcome to the club!”

  My mother and her prayers are like a powerful weapon. I mean, she carries those prayers around with her like the stuff Batman carries in that little fanny pack around his waist! She’s prayed up a gold record and over a half million records sold!

  OMG.

  “Sunday! Are you there?” Mystique says.

  “I’m here! I am. I just can’t believe this is happening. Every time something new comes up, I just can’t believe it!”

  Mystique giggles. “You better start believing it, girl! I told you that you are more than a one-hit wonder. You’re set to be an icon!”

  This makes me think of the future. A future of living a fabulous life! A future of getting my mother off of her job, out of this neighborhood, and into a gated community. A future of my little cousin Manny going to private schools and getting the best education his little grown self can handle.

  But there’s no way I can visualize the future without putting Sam in the picture!

  34

  “I can’t believe it’s finally here! My first day of college.” I’m having a confessional right on the Spelman campus. There’s a whole camera crew and not just our regular camera dude. I think they want to get a lot of shots of the school and students, to make this episode really pro-education.

  “It’s ironic, because I wouldn’t even be in this music industry thing if it wasn’t for me trying to get to college. And now, I’m finally here.”

  “How are you feeling about Sam not being here in ATL with you?” the producer asks.

  “Well, it’s hard not having my best friend here with me. We were planning to have a lot of fun off-campus. But he’s getting his grind on, and I can’t hate him for that. It’s all about the come up.”

  The camera crew follows me as I try to make heads or tails of this campus map. My mom was going to take off work to come with me, but she has a fear of being on TV. She thinks that the TV makes her look fatter than she really is. I keep telling her that all those pots of spaghetti are making her look fatter, but anyway.

  I’m staying in the Stewart Living & Learning Center! It’s the only residence hall with upperclassmen too. And it’s for all of us extra-smart honors students. Score!

  “Here it is!” I say out loud although I’m not talking to anyone in particular.

  The other girls on campus are staring at me, or maybe at the crew of cameramen that are following me. This is gonna be a little bit weird, I think. But as soon as I’m able to ditch the cameras, I think it’ll be easier.

  I walk into the residence hall and find my room, which is on the second floor. It’s a double-occupancy room, so I get a roommate! I’m looking forward to this. I hope she’ll be cool, smart, and funny, and I hope she doesn’t mind having to share a room with a pop star.

  I use my key card to open the door, and I squeal at how the room has been decorated. There’s not a stitch of Ikea furniture in here! This is all top of the line. My bed has a huge purple comforter with fringes and white pom poms. It’s totally something my mom would’ve picked for me, even though I’m not a girly girl.

  My roommate is here too. She’s looking me up and down with a little smile on her face.

  “Are you kidding me? I got the reality star?” she says.

  It takes a half second for me to realize that she’s kidding, and we both burst into laughter. “Hi, I’m Sunday Tolliver,” I say.

  “Well everyone knows who you are! I’m Gia Stokes. Nice to meet you.”

  Gia looks like she’s gonna be a buttload of fun. She’s got this huge afro with a butterfly clip holding it up on the side. She’s super tall and thin—model thin. And even though she doesn’t have on a stitch of makeup she looks camera ready.

  She’s gorgeous. I hate her! Just kidding.

  “I guess having an interior designer is one of the perks of having a star for a roommate. Are there any other ones?” Gia asks. She motions to the cameras. “Are they one of the perks?”

  I laugh out loud. “No. They’ll be gone after today.”

  “Cool, cool. Well, I’ll let you settle in. Do you want something to eat? I’m going to grab something from Jack in the Crack.”

  “Sure! A burger would be great.”

  I watch Gia sashay past the cameras with her heeled sandals on. Strut, girl! But then she stumbles and nearly falls. She catches herself, and then turns to look at the cameraman.

  “Make sure that doesn’t wind up on TV. I’m trying to preserve my pretty-girl swag.”

  I crack up laughing. This chick is hilarious! I already can tell we are going to be great friends. She leaves the room and closes the door behind her.

  Then two seconds later, she pops her head back in. “Spelman, baby!” she yells.

  This makes me burst into a full-on belly laugh. Yeah, this year is gonna be great. College is so going to rock. And I’m doin’ it big-money, college-pimpin’ style!

  Spelman, baby!

  A READING GROUP GUIDE

  DOING MY OWN THING

  Nikki Carter

  ABOUT THIS GUIDE

  The following questions are intended to

  enhance your group’s reading of

  DOING MY OWN THING.

  Discussion Questions

  1. Was Sunday right to invite her crew on her tour? Was it a good or a bad decision?

  2. Was Sam being unreasonable when he wanted a commitment from Sunday?

  3. Is Dreya the villain of the story, or does she really have Sunday’s back?

  4. If you were Dreya, would you have forgiven Tr
uth? Why or why not?

  5. Do you believe that Bethany has truly turned over a new leaf? Is she a good match for Dilly, or should he find another girl before he gets hurt?

  6. How did you feel when Sunday met up with her father? Should she have made a different decision about him?

  7. Did Sunday give the correct advice to her fan Zoey whose boyfriend broke up with her on Facebook? Has that ever happened to you? How did you feel?

  8. What were your thoughts on Shawn’s advice to Sunday about Dreya? Should she just pray for her cousin or continue to hold it down for family?

  9. Do you think that Sunday and Sam will survive a long-distance relationship?

  10. Will Sunday and Gia make good roommates? Do you think they’re compatible?

  Nikki Carter Interview Questions

  Q. Nikki, you seem to really like reality shows! Which ones are your favorites?

  A. Real Housewives of Atlanta is my favorite! I used to watch Flava of Love too. Beyond hilarious.

  Q. So who would win in a fight, NeNe or Kim?

  A. NeNe. All day and all night. Hands down.

  Q. Who has more pretty-girl swag, Nicki Minaj or Lil’ Kim?

  A. Well . . . Lil’ Kim has grown-lady swag. She’s got nothing to prove! But Nicki Minaj is a beast! It’s a TIE!

  Q. Who are your top-five favorite rappers?

  A. Nas, Eminem, Drake, Jay-Z, and the late, GREAT Notorious B.I.G.