What They Don’t Know
Page 22
I’ve tried to capture that aspect of abortion in this book. The deep, gut-wrenching emotion of the decision-making process. I hope I’ve succeeded.
I have always been pro-choice, but before I started working on this novel, I think I would’ve judged these women without even realizing I was doing it. I would’ve thought something like, I would never get myself into that situation or I would make a different choice. But writing this novel taught me you can never truly know what you would do in a certain situation until you are in it, and we can’t judge anyone for making a choice under circumstances that we haven’t experienced.
No one wants to have an abortion. No one waltzes into a clinic whistling a happy tune. It is the most agonizing decision a woman may ever have to make. And anyone who accuses women of using abortion as birth control needs to look at the underlying issues. Can she afford birth control? Does she live three hundred miles from the closest clinic and work two jobs and can’t drive that far for the appointment to get a prescription for birth control? Does her abusive boyfriend refuse to wear a condom?
Until we walk in someone else’s shoes, we cannot know. We cannot judge.
But what we can do is examine the fact that the maternal mortality rate has skyrocketed in the United States, so much so that we have the most pregnancy-related deaths in any developed nation. We are the only country in the developed world where the number of women who die in childbirth has actually risen in the last twenty-five years. That is a direct result of a lack of access to reproductive health care, to birth control, and to abortions. It is also a symptom of a culture that places more value on the life of a fetus than the life of its mother.
Let us all be pro-life—the real meaning of pro-life. Let us be in favor of the whole life of a woman, not just her role as a mother, but everything else she might accomplish. Let us be for life coming into the world when it is wanted, and cared for emotionally and financially. Let us support the entire life of that child from birth to death.
Let us encourage women to make the decision that is best for them, instead of shaming them. Let our bodies be our own, not a political battleground. Let us have the same autonomy over our bodies that men have. Let us be free—to choose, to share our stories, and to live.
Resources
If you have been abused or sexually assaulted, RAINN can help. Contact the National Sexual Assault Hotline at (800) 656-HOPE or visit their website at rainn.org.
For comprehensive reproductive health care, including Pap smears, annual check-ups, birth control, breast cancer screenings, prenatal care, and abortion services, visit your local Planned Parenthood. Find a health center online at plannedparenthood.org or call (800) 230-PLAN.
To find out about abortion restrictions in your state, visit guttmacher.org or plannedparenthood.org.
Reading Group Guide
1. At the beginning of the story, Lise picks up on clues in Mellie’s behavior that lead her to believe something is wrong. Even though Mellie tells her to leave her alone, Lise persists. At what point would you have given up on getting someone to open up to you? Do you think Lise pushed too hard?
2. When Mellie finally opens up to Lise, she’s relieved and also surprised that she feels comfortable confiding in Lise. Is there a person in your life who you turn to? Are there people in your life who you care about, but whom you wouldn’t be willing to trust with your confidence?
3. One of the main themes of the book is choice. We all have the right to make our own choices for ourselves. Do you agree with Mellie’s choice? Do you agree with Lise’s choice to help Mellie no matter what?
4. Alanna’s safety is one of Lise’s top priorities, but in the end, she and Alanna sacrifice their safety to help Mellie. Would you have done the same? What lengths would you go to in order to protect the people you love?
5. If one of your teachers gave you a journal to write in, would you do it? How much of your innermost self would you expose on the page, knowing that someone else is going to read it?
6. Throughout the book, Mellie is determined not to tell her parents the truth about what happened to her, supposedly to protect her sister. Do you think she should have told them right away? How do you think the story would have changed if she’d opened up to them—or a teacher or another responsible adult—in the first place?
7. Do you agree with how Mellie’s parents handled her situation? If you were a parent, how do you think you would handle it?
8. Thirty-nine out of the fifty United States have some kind of parental consent or notification law if an underage girl wants to have an abortion. Do you agree that states should have parental permission and/or notification laws? What are the advantages and disadvantages of such a law?
9. The goal of the anti-choice movement is to reduce abortions by limiting access. The goal of the pro-choice movement is to reduce abortions by expanding access to birth control and reproductive health care. Which approach do you think is more effective? Is there another option to consider? If so, what?
10. Mellie begins the book sharing the beliefs her parents taught her, but by the end of the book, she has a different perspective. What do you think changed her beliefs? Do you think she was influenced by Lise’s beliefs or her own experience?
11. At the end of the book, Lise decides she wants to pursue a career in politics. Do you think that is a good way to effect change? Is there an issue you would like to see changed in your community, and how would you effect that change?
12. Toward the beginning of the book, Lise thinks she is ready to have sex with Rowan, but her experience with Mellie makes her rethink her decision. If you were Lise’s friend and she wanted to talk through this decision, how would you advise her?
13. What do you think Mellie and Lise do with their lives after the book ends? How do you think this experience changed them?
14. Is there a villain in this book? Who do you think it is? Why?
15. Do you think it is possible to be friends with someone who has completely different beliefs than you? How can those differences strengthen or weaken a friendship?
Acknowledgments
There are a lot of people without whom my books and my writing would not happen, and to them I am forever grateful.
To my agent, my tireless champion, Irene Goodman, I owe so much gratitude that there is not enough gratitude in the world to cover my debt. Thank you for giving me the kernel of the idea for this story, and then encouraging me all along the way. Thank you for fighting for it with as much passion as I had. Thank you for being my anchor for the last thirteen years, and please don’t ever retire because I will be lost without you.
To my editor, Annette Pollert-Morgan, for seemingly reading my mind and being on the same page (pun intended!) with me about what this book needed to be. Thank you for your guidance in making this book the strongest possible version of itself. Most of all, thank you for allowing me to say what I wanted to say, and pushing me to make my voice stronger.
To Cassie Gutman, my production editor, and Christa Desir, my copyeditor, for your incredibly astute notes, for making every word of this book matter, and for hearting my Parks and Rec and Game of Thrones references. To the entire Sourcebooks team, especially Sarah Kasman, Steve Geck, and Todd Stocke, for supporting this book and for giving me the space and breadth I needed to write it.
Thank you so much to my early readers Michelle Levy and Lizzie Andrews for your notes, advice, and encouragement. A very special thank-you to my sensitivity reader and friend Michelle Grondine for your very loving notes and for being such a strong, outspoken advocate for sexual assault survivors.
A huge bourbon barrel of thanks to the Los Angeles writing community, whose enduring support and love is a source of strength and much-needed levity. Nobody has more fun than a bunch of writers when they get together. Special thanks to Robin Reul, Gretchen McNeil, Jen Klein, Kathy Kottaras, Amy Spalding, Tracy Holczer, Catherine L
inka, Charlotte Huang, Elana K. Arnold, Mary McCoy, and Jen Brody for being some of the best pals a girl could ever ask for.
To my twin brain, my soul sister, Romina (Russell) Garber—where would I be without you? One sad sack drinking coffee at Le Pain Quotidien all alone. Your friendship means the world to me, and your support throughout the writing of this book kept me sane.
To my best big sister, Tanya, for always, always being on my side.
To Chris and Emilia, who sustain me. I can do anything because I have you.
To all the women who spoke to me about their abortion experiences: Danielle, Gina, Connie, Heather, Jen, and other friends: I hope you know what a gift you gave me by sharing your stories. This book is for you.
And lastly, to all the women and girls out there who are making this decision right now: I see you. I support you. And you are not alone.
About the Author
Nicole Maggi wrote her first story in third grade about a rainbow and a unicorn. She is the author of The Forgetting, a 2016 International Thriller Writers Thriller Award finalist, and the Twin Willows Trilogy, which VOYA called “reminiscent of Twilight and Harry Potter.” Visit her at nicolemaggi.com.
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