Next Summer
Page 2
“Drool much?” Kelsi teased, apparently noticing Ella’s appreciation of the long-limbed blond guy who ambled in front of the car at a stop sign.
“I never drool,” Ella replied, smiling. “I just…admire.”
And admire she did. There were boys everywhere, jostling one another on the sidewalks and slouching off toward the beach. Ella wanted to eat every last one of them up.
“Really?” Kelsi sounded amused. “Didn’t you make some sort of vow when we got into the car this morning? Something about you swearing off guys this summer?”
Ella winced at the mere mention of that. Why did Kelsi have to be so damn attentive?
“Oh, right,” she said. “Of course I’m sticking to that vow. But, hello, I’m not blind.”
As Kelsi laughed, Ella reminded herself that this summer, she was on a high self-esteem, low hook-up diet. She wasn’t going to indulge in messing around with random members of the male species, no matter how seemingly delicious. She was the new, improved Ella, who was only going to commit to one guy. One relationship. Love and trust and blah blah blah. There would be no more of Ella’s patented flirting or her treating boys like the one-use towels you get at the public pool.
“Well, El, since you’re on sabbatical, that leaves a whole lot more guys for the rest of us,” Kelsi said with another laugh as she turned from the main road onto the little dirt track that led to the cottages.
Ella felt a little chill race through her as the car bumped along the dirt, but she shook it off. So what if Kelsi wanted to mix it up with some hottie? That was what summer was for. And Kelsi deserved to relax, have fun, and rake in the admirers. She’d gotten her heart broken last summer, after all.
And so had Ella, but the difference was Ella’s heart wound was self-inflicted. She’d pretty much known Peter was a creep, and she’d still gone after him.
Ella had discovered that when you do something hideous and no one else knows about it, you had only yourself for comfort. It was a lonely way to live. Then again, Ella had herself to blame for being in that position, and there wasn’t any use dwelling on it now, especially when an entire new summer was ahead of her.
Kelsi pulled up in front of the cottage their family rented every summer, and they both climbed out of the car. Ella treated herself to a nice long stretch, and gazed around at the familiar sights. The tall pine trees ringed the lawn, with the cottages nestled into place at their roots. The beach was just beyond the dunes. The Maine sun was at its best up above, showering everything with light and warmth.
Last summer was in the past, Ella kept telling herself. Over. She was a different person now—a better one, and a better sister, too.
“This is going to be the best summer yet. I can feel it,” Kelsi said, coming around the car and grinning at Ella. She slung an arm around Ella’s shoulders and squeezed her. “Aren’t you excited?”
“I can’t wait,” Ella said with her best smile, and in that moment, she decided to be just as excited as she sounded.
3
“We’re leaving without you!”
Ella’s voice floated over from the yard on the evening air. Kelsi was in her room; she knew her sister and Beth were waiting for her to finish dressing for the first party of the summer. She had already discarded just about every top she’d brought with her, and was halfway through a repeat cycle.
The thing was, she felt strange. The not-being-comfortable-in-your-own-skin kind of strange. Every minute that went by, Kelsi became a little bit more anxious and nervous. She had no idea what was making her feel like her legs were made out of lo mein noodles, but whatever it was, she just wanted it to take a hike so that she could enjoy the start of another Pebble Beach summer.
After all, Kelsi had everything under control. She had just graduated from high school at the top of her class, and she was headed to Smith in the fall. Kelsi should have been practically drunk on her own shining future. She had felt so together at graduation. Like she knew exactly who she was and where she was going.
Funny. Kelsi didn’t feel remotely that way at the moment.
“Kels! Come on!” This time it was Beth. Her cousin’s voice was less strident than Ella’s, but she still sounded impatient. Kelsi snuck a look out the window. The last streaks of the red sunset were fading from the sky, which meant the party down on the pier would just be getting underway.
Kelsi took a deep breath, and looked at her reflection in the mirror one more time.
She was just going to have to go with the deep V-necked black T-shirt and her favorite pair of jeans. Both were from Anthropologie, Kelsi’s absolutely most-favorite store in the world. The black push-up bra Ella had talked her into buying at Victoria’s Secret was working big-time, and Kelsi had to admit, she liked the result. Her newly re-dyed dark brown hair was pulled back in a sassy, casual ponytail that had taken at least forty minutes to perfect, and she slicked another coat of lip gloss across her lips.
Now, if she could just feel the way she looked…
“What are you doing in here?” Ella demanded, appearing in the door of the bedroom the two of them shared. She leaned against the doorjamb and snapped her gum a few times, a habit that drove Kelsi absolutely crazy. Luckily, at the moment, she was too wound up to get sufficiently agitated.
“I’m ready,” Kelsi said, grinning at her baby sister as if she’d never been more at ease. She made for the door, but stopped when she saw Ella glance at the pile of rejected shirts that now covered her bedspread and half of Ella’s.
“You had a fashion emergency and you didn’t call me?” Ella put a hand over her heart. “I think my feelings are hurt.”
“I was having a bad-me day.” Kelsi gave a wry grin.
“Puh-leeze, you look fantastic. Better than me, even,” Ella said through her trademark snort of a laugh.
Without a moment to lose, Kelsi and Ella dashed out to the yard, where Beth was standing with her arms wrapped around herself, staring up at the sky.
“I always forget how clear it is up here,” she said. “The night looks almost…messy with all those stars, doesn’t it?”
Kelsi tipped her head back, breathing in the clean air and the ever-present scent of the evergreens. Beth was right. Up above the pines, the sky was littered with stars she never got to see in New Canaan. She had a second to remind herself about all the possibilities that were awaiting her, but then it was time to move.
The girls began walking down the dirt road that led from the Tuttles’ three rental cottages to Pebble Beach’s main strip. The trees towered over the narrow track, and grass clung to the little cliff between the tire ruts and the forest.
“As you can see, Beth dressed for the occasion,” Ella told Kelsi, a teasing lilt in her voice.
Kelsi glanced at Beth. Her cousin was wearing track pants and a blue scoop-necked tee. Her long blonde hair—so different from Ella’s sexy mane—fell straight down her back.
“What?” Beth asked, opening her arms wide and looking down at herself. “I put on a clean shirt.”
Kelsi adored the fact that Beth saw no reason to put on makeup or a cute outfit for parties. Clearly, having a boyfriend hadn’t changed Beth that much.
“And if you feel like it, you can just go for a quick jog between beers,” Ella said, shooting her cousin a sideways look with her heavily mascaraed eyes.
“My Jimmy Choos don’t go with this outfit,” Beth told Ella, bouncing up on the toes of her sneakers. “Anyway, I’ll leave the fabulousness to you and your tiny dress.” She looked back at Kelsi. “And you, with the lip stuff. What’s with that?”
“It adds moisture.” Kelsi shrugged. Last year, Kelsi’s idea of dressing up was adding the occasional bandanna to her ensemble. Lip gloss was never in her repertoire. “I’m still a vegetarian, if that makes you feel better.”
“Everything about this summer is weird,” Beth grumbled.
“Tell us about your year, Bethy,” Ella commanded. “How is George? I want juicy boyfriend details. Have you guys
done it, or what?”
“Ella!” Beth squealed, but it sounded like she was only pretending to be scandalized. “How is that your business?”
Kelsi trailed slightly behind them while Beth talked. She tilted her head back a little bit to bask in the surrounding night. She loved Pebble Beach. She loved the dirt roads washed with sand, and the stretch of cold sea in the distance. Boats bobbed on their moorings, the clank of lines against the masts announcing their presence in the dark. As she turned left toward town, the bright white lights of the pier danced ahead, beckoning her into another summer.
Kelsi couldn’t contain the slight tremor of apprehension that went through her. There would be people everywhere and a band playing onstage—she could hear the thump of the bass even from this far away. It was like déjà vu, but she fervently hoped that the band wouldn’t include Peter, her asshole of an ex.
What bothered Kelsi (maybe more than it should) was that she’d never had a real boyfriend. Listening to Beth ramble on about her relationship just made it achingly obvious to Kelsi that there was something wrong with her. She had such shitty luck with guys. Kelsi had been so sure Peter was this charming, cool rocker, but he had turned out to be a liar and a cheat. Before Peter, she’d spent three months dating Brian before he’d gone off to college. He’d broken up with her because she hadn’t been ready to sleep with him. Two guys—and both of them were losers. What a track record, indeed.
The truth of the matter was, Kelsi was eighteen years old, still a virgin, and her younger cousin seemed a lot more adept than her at picking out a really good guy. Not to mention her sister, who got boys as easily as she breathed. Kelsi was starting to think she was destined to spend the rest of her life as a celibate dickhead magnet.
“What’s wrong with you now?” Ella’s exasperated voice floated back to Kelsi through the dark. “Are you up for this party or not?”
“I’m looking at the stars,” Kelsi replied. She looked up again. The stars crowded the sky, so many lights that it almost made Kelsi dizzy.
Kelsi took another deep breath, and released it back into the crisp night. There was sand on her toes and salt in her hair. A new summer waited just ahead. Now she just had to catch up to it.
4
The pier, as usual, looked like a scene out of Laguna Beach, except the setting was more earthy. Less glamorous. But the boys were rounded up in packs as if they were in line for a casting call. Ella wondered if this tiny little section of New England had suddenly become the spot where the world’s most eligible guys could hang out and look unequivocally scrumptious.
Ella led the way into the crowd, feeling self-assured as the party swept her into its loud chaos. She was lapping up the attention she was getting from all the boys who were checking out the little green tube-dress she’d picked out just for the occasion.
Ella might have decided to turn over a new leaf, but that didn’t mean she had to dress like a saint, did it?
A tall guy with toned arms and wavy auburn hair sidled up to Ella without a word and tried to wrap his arm around her waist, so she shimmied a little bit and laughed at him as she pulled away. His buddy, who was cute-ish, but short, whistled low and deliberately, which made her smile. Beth and Kelsi nudged each other and rolled their eyes, weaving around Ella and the two drooling guys.
“Sorry, boys,” Ella said matter-of-factly, but with a grin. “This is strictly a girls’ night out.” Then she waved the guys away, feeling merry and powerful, surrounded by the music and salty air. She dodged a couple of kids making out and caught up with her sister and cousin, who’d come to a stop near the railing at the edge of the pier.
“I hate that Jamie’s not here,” Beth said, sadly looking around at the crowd. “She loved the pier.”
“She’s not dead, she’s in a summer program,” Kelsi pointed out, poking Beth in the side. “God, could you be any mopier?”
“She misses George,” Ella confided, loudly enough to alert half of Pebble Beach. She realized her volume and giggled. “Oops.”
Beth blushed, which she hardly ever did, and glanced down, clearly affected by Ella’s words.
“He’s not coming up at all?” Kelsi asked Beth softly.
Ella tried to listen, but her eyes were scanning the crowd, browsing for hotties. She was beginning to think that what she called her I-can-stop-anytime-I-want-to obsession with guys was actually a full-on addiction. Maybe she needed to wear a medicine patch on her arm or check herself into rehab. What was wrong with her? Why couldn’t she just stay focused on her cousins? They were just as much fun as boys. More fun, maybe.
Okay, who was she kidding?
“He called me earlier and said that he won’t have any time off until August,” Beth replied with a shrug, wrinkling up her nose.
“I like George,” Ella said, managing to take her mind off the Taye Diggs look-alike who was winking at her. She sternly reminded herself of The Vow. “He’s a great guy.”
“Wow, that’s a first, Ella.” Beth shook her head in amazement. Ella usually made fun of George for being so boyish. “You almost sound like you mean it.”
“I do, actually. In fact, I think I want one for myself,” Ella added.
“He’s not a Kate Spade bag. He’s a person,” Beth pointed out.
Ella felt a bit offended by that remark, though she understood that it had some merit. Yes, she was notorious for being a little shallow and materialistic and boy-crazy. But since her sinful encounter with Peter last year, Ella had been working hard on trying to become less self-obsessed. A part of Ella was truly growing tired of the whole game. She wanted to meet someone she could really get close to. The only thing preventing that from happening was the other part of her that wanted to kiss whomever she pleased. Still, Ella was trying to reel herself in. She wanted—needed—to change for the better.
“Yeah, but George is the perfect boyfriend. Steady. Reliable. I mean, every summer, it’s all about the hooking up and the chasing and the drama,” she complained to Kelsi and Beth.
“Did you even hook up last summer?” Kelsi interrupted.
Ella froze. Like she even wanted to touch that question. She sighed dramatically instead of answering.
“I was pretty preoccupied with the whole Peter mess,” Kelsi went on. “I can’t remember what your summer drama was, El.”
Crap. “I’m totally going to settle down this summer,” Ella announced abruptly, hoping to get Kelsi off the subject. “Just like Britney has.”
Beth just shook her head, and Kelsi swallowed a laugh.
“I’m serious, you guys. Listen, Beth. If you see me slipping and accidentally flirting with some hot summer boy, you have to promise to cut me off. Drag me away if necessary.”
“Why is this my job?” Beth asked, but she was grinning.
“Hey, if Jamie were here, I’d give her the job. She’s a lot stricter,” Ella replied.
“Well, if I’m going to spend the summer being your chastity belt, then I think you owe me a road trip down to Amherst.” Beth looked from one cousin to the other. “If Jamie can’t come to Pebble Beach, we should bring Pebble Beach to Jamie. For, like, a weekend or something. What do you say?”
“Awesome. I love road trips!” Ella replied enthusiastically.
“It’s a great idea,” Kelsi agreed. “Count me in. And I brought my car up, so I can drive.”
“Great,” Beth said with a grin. “But no way you’re doing all the driving, Kelsi. By the time we get there, Jamie will have published her novel already.”
Ella laughed at her sister’s notoriously slow, careful driving, and dug out a cigarette from her bag. She put it to her lips, and was pleased when a guy leaned over and offered her his lighter. Ella did everything she could not to ogle his killer grin and sculpted shoulders, which were hiding beneath a blue hoodie.
“Aren’t you sweet,” Ella said, batting her eyes and letting out a perfect smoke ring.
“Ah-choo, cutitout,” Beth said through a blatantly fake sneeze.
Ella sighed heavily. Jamie would have been a lot more subtle than that.
“Let’s find something to drink,” Kelsi said, which was definitely a plan Ella could support. “It’s time to get this summer started.”
Ella gave the lighter-sporting cutie a special little smile, and then followed her sister deeper into the crowd.
Down on the beach, some guys had started a big bonfire closer to the dunes. While Kelsi went to grab beers, Ella settled herself on one of the rocks nearby. Immediately, two new guys came over to talk to her. All Ella had to do was just be and guys would practically come wandering out of the shrubbery to look at her adoringly. Is there a silent whistle I could blow that would make them go away? Ella wondered. And if so, would I really want to use it?