Worth Saving
Page 17
“The thing is, Layla, I guess there was a client that came in and asked for you by name. They wanted you in particular, so Damien was calling you to try to get you to come in for the client. The guy was gonna pay, like, two or three grand for you to spend the night with him. So, Damien was going on and on about how you made him lose money, because when he couldn’t get you, the guy didn’t want anybody else and left. The last time something like this happened and Damien lost out on this amount of money, I had to stand there and watch you get burned with a cigarette. That isn’t anything I want to see ever again, Layla.”
I have to take a minute to let all the information settle in, because now I’m worried. It was one thing when I thought I was just avoiding Damien being an annoying, intruding asshole, but it’s something completely different when it involves him losing money.
In the time I’ve spent at Red Pony, I’ve seen Damien hit multiple women, but it’s always worse when the situation involves money. The only thing I know Damien loves is money, it’s all he cares about. The last thing any of us want to do is keep him from making it, and when one of us does, he’s equal opportunity in how he deals with it. He wants to make his response as violent, and as public as possible, because he wants it to be a lesson to the rest of the girls. This is the fate I may have inadvertently brought upon myself.
“Are you still there, Layla?” Marlene says after I take too long to respond.
“Umm, yeah, I’m here,” I say, swallowing hard. “Umm, well, I don’t really know what to say, Marlene. When he texted me, he didn’t say anything about a client asking for me. I didn’t know about that.”
“Okay. Maybe you should tell him that, sweetie.”
“Yeah, maybe I should. You think I should call him?”
“Yeah, you probably should. Just tell him you didn’t know, and maybe he’ll just let it go.”
“Yeah, you’re right,” I reply as my heart rate starts to pick up. The fear I feel when it comes to Damien is something that’s nearly impossible for me shake. He’s branded all of us with that fear. He’s beaten it into all of us who’ve made the mistake of getting on his bad side. That fear grips me and tries to keep me from doing anything. I can barely move, I can barely think. It’s a strait jacket.
“Okay, well, I’ll let you go so you can call him and get this all worked out before you come in tomorrow,” Marlene says, finally sounding like she’s starting to come down from her own fear of Damien. That’s the effect he has on all the girls who work at Red Pony—he makes you afraid, even if he’s never laid a finger on you.
“Okay, I really appreciate you calling me to give the heads up about all this,” I say as I finish zipping up my dress and sit on the bed. “I’m gonna call him now, and I’ll see you when I come in tomorrow.”
“Okay, sweetie. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
After I hang up the phone, I sit on the edge of the bed and think. I rest my chin in my palms and sit there, wondering if it’s even worth it to call Damien. I’ve known him long enough to know he doesn’t forgive easily, if at all. He’s just not a very nice person, and he thrives on seeing other people being afraid. It makes him feel powerful, and it gives him control over all of us, and that’s a control I don’t want him—or anybody else—to have over me. So, if I call him, I have to beg for his mercy and tell him I didn’t know what the phone call was about at all, which he’ll counter by saying I should be answering all calls from him no matter what. He’ll be pissed I ignored his call at all, and there’s no way to get around that. There’s no fix to it, so what’s the point? Why give Damien the satisfaction of hearing me beg for mercy? And what if he asks me to come in tonight? What if he wants to punish me by making me come in and working earlier than I’m supposed to? Am I willing to put my plans with Austin on hold so I can go back to work and be forced to be with someone else?
I look up and see myself in the mirror, and I hate how I look. Today’s my birthday, and this is the last thing I wanted to have to deal with when I woke up this morning. Austin and I decided we wouldn’t go out. We just wanted to enjoy a night in together for my birthday, since I have to go back to work tomorrow, and he has plans to go out with Jason and Jordan. This is supposed to be a night for us to enjoy being together before we have to go back to the lives we had before we knew each other, and if I call Damien, there’s a good chance all of that’ll go right out the window. Even if Damien doesn’t tell me to come in, he’ll say something fucked up to try to scare me, and I’ll end up thinking about it for the rest of the night, and I won’t be able to give Austin the attention he deserves. Damien will control our night. I’m not going to let that happen.
It’s bad enough I had to sit there at the table last night trying to act like I wasn’t worrying about my phone. It’s bad enough I had to lie to Austin again and tell him it was Marlene who was texting and calling. It’s bad enough I had to turn my phone completely off just to be able to enjoy my night with him. It’s bad enough I have to go back to work tomorrow knowing that at some point I’m actually going to have to do my job. I’m going to have to be the available girl I am. It’s bad enough I have to break Austin’s heart.
I won’t let Damien and Red Pony ruin this night. Austin and I made plans to be together before everything changes, and that’s what we’re going to do. So, I lift myself up off the bed and walk over to the mirror. I grab my brush and run it through my hair a few times to make it look the way I want it to, and I apply my lip gloss. I put on my silver necklace, then walk back over to the bed so I can put on my black heels.
I don’t know what’s going to happen tomorrow. Everything’s going to be different when I have to go back to work, and I know what that means for Austin and me. So, tonight I’m going with my heart. It might only be for one night, but tonight I’m going to be free. Tonight, I’m not going to think about Red Pony, or Damien, or my past, or the future. Tonight will only be about tonight. Tonight, I’ll let my guard down, and the only thing that’ll exist is the two of us. There’s no world outside of this apartment. Tonight, it’s just about us.
So, when I hear knocking on the door and I make my way towards it, I cut off any outside thoughts. I take a deep breath and clear my mind of anything besides Austin and me. But, as I reach for the door knob, I hesitate. A thought suddenly crosses my mind, and I speed walk back into the bedroom. I see the phone lying there on the bed, and I know what I have to do. So, I grab it and press the button to turn off the power.
“There,” I say to myself in the mirror. “Now, I’m ready.”
Layla
“Hey, beautiful.”
“Hey,” I say as I open the door wide enough to let Austin in. He’s wearing black pants and a white t-shirt that hugs his muscles. He’s pure sex appeal. “What’s that?”
“Oh, you mean these?” Austin holds up a yellow plastic bag and smiles from ear to ear. “What we have here is two sirloin steaks, ready to be seasoned to perfection and cooked right here, right now.”
“What? You brought food? I thought we were just gonna hang out.”
“We are just gonna hang out,” Austin replies as he strides into the kitchen and takes the steaks out of the bag. “But, we’re also gonna eat this dinner I’m about to cook for you, because it’s your birthday.”
“Aww, you don’t have to do that, Austin,” I say, but obviously I think it’s incredibly sweet.
“I know I don’t have to. I want to.”
Austin walks back over and gives me a playful kiss on the cheek, and then turns on his heel and goes back into the kitchen. He opens up a few cabinets and pulls out a couple of pots and a skillet. Then, he goes back to the yellow bag and pulls out three separate spices. He spends the next few minutes seasoning the steaks, and before he even sets them on the skillet, they already smell amazing and have my stomach growling. He fills one pot with water and dumps a can of red sauce into the other. I watch him as he lightheartedly moves around the kitchen, dancing back and forth between the sink and the stove, even t
hough there’s no music on.
“Well, you’re in a cheerful mood,” I say, feeling my own smile come to life. “Did you have a good day today?”
“My day was normal, really,” he replies as he finally stops moving and leans against the counter to wait for the water to start boiling. “I went to breakfast with Jason and Jordan, and then I went back home and planned out how I wanted this night with you to go.”
“Oh, so you have plans now?”
“I do have plans. Dinner is phase one.”
“A multi-phase plan? Okay, so you’re not sticking to our plan of just hanging out and watching some movies together. So, fill me in on how things are gonna be different then.”
“Well,” Austin begins as he leans over and sees the water is starting to boil. “These plans are only allowed to be known by the person who made the plans. Therefore, you’re out of luck, ma’am. Sorry.”
I have no choice but to laugh.
“What? I don’t get to know the plans in my own house?” I say between giggles.
“That’s the way the cookie crumbles,” he replies with a shrug.
“Oh, wow. Well, these better be some pretty awesome plans then.”
“You just need to sit back and relax, alright? I got this.”
“Okay, okay. It’s your show, Mr. Sloan.”
Austin faces me and takes a bow like a magician standing center stage, then he turns back to the stove and goes to work. I watch him as he finishes making the pasta and covers it with a lid. Then, he heats up the skillet and tosses the steaks on, they immediately start to sizzle. He looks like he’s been doing this for a while. Maybe it’s another thing he got from his mom while his dad was flying for the Air Force. Apparently, Mrs. Sloan did a good job of raising Austin to be awesome.
It doesn’t take long for everything to be ready, and Austin quickly serves up the pasta and steak. When we sit down at the table and I take my first bite, I’m shocked at how delicious it is.
“Wow, this is amazing, Austin,” I say as I chew a piece of the perfectly cooked, medium rare steak. “What the hell kind of seasoning did you put on this thing? This is better than the steaks I pay for at restaurants.”
Austin showcases a proud smile.
“Oh you know, it’s just my special blend of awesome-sauce and amazing, mixed in with a little bit of I’m-kind-of-a-badass-ness.”
“Oh my gosh,” I say as I try to fight off my laughter so I don’t choke on the meat in my mouth. “Well, it’s good, but I think it could use a splash of humble juice.”
“Well played,” Austin says as he chuckles. “Nah, honestly, my mother taught me a thing or two about throwing down in the kitchen.”
“Well, your mother was a great teacher, and she sounds like an awesome woman.”
“She is. Everything good in me is from my mother. My dad was great, too, but he was gone so often all I really had was my mom, and she was perfect.”
“That’s great. Do you talk to her often?”
“I try to talk to my parents at least once a week. It can get a little difficult when I’m doing a lot of training and getting ready to deploy or go TDY.”
“Okay,” I interrupt. “I’ve heard you say something about going TDY before, but I don’t know what that means. What is TDY?”
Austin smiles as he chews, then he sips the Amaretto we decided to have for dinner.
“TDY stands for temporary duty. It’s basically anything that takes you away from the base you’re assigned to for any period of time less than six months—stuff like training and school that are typically in the states. Deployments are usually out of the country and are longer.”
“Ah, I see. The military uses a lot of acronyms, huh?”
“More than you can possibly imagine. Hell, more than I can possible imagine. Everything is an acronym.”
“I get it. There’s a lot involved with something that sophisticated,” I say, still marveling at how good everything tastes. “So, now that you’ve been back from your last deployment for a while, are you ready to go back to work on Monday?”
Austin’s shrug is accompanied by a twist of his mouth.
“I don’t know. I’ve been doing this for a while, and I’ve always enjoyed it for the most part. It’ll be interesting going back after everything that’s happened.”
“Yeah. Do you think you’ll have to deploy again anytime soon?”
“Umm, I don’t know. I hope not.”
“Don’t like deployments anymore?”
“Well, it’s not that, really. I have more of a reason to stay now.”
I feel like I already know that he’s talking about me, but I don’t want to just jump out there and say it. But, something in me really hopes he’s talking about me.
“You didn’t have a reason to stay before?” I ask, trying to pull him into answering and hoping the answer is what I want it to be. When he looks up and smiles at me, I get warm butterflies in my stomach.
“No, I didn’t have a reason to stay before I met you,” he says, rolling right into it. My face feels hot and I’m sure my skin has turned bright red. “I told you I wasn’t into anything like relationships before, and that made it easier to leave. But, I like this thing we have going, and I’d like to soak up as much of it as I can without it being interrupted by a long pause due to a deployment.”
I have to put a lot of effort into pulling the smile off my face, but eventually I succeed and am able to speak again.
“Well, it’s good to know I’m not the only one who’s enjoying our time together. It’d suck if you had to leave for six months or something like that. I might worry about you.”
“Oh, you might? Way to play it cool and keep it nonchalant. I like it,” he replies with a smile and a nod of his head. “Well, I might miss you if I had to leave. Maybe. So, how about you? You ready to get back to work tomorrow? All those crazy guys hitting on you and that loud music?”
The smile on my face melts right off. I was doing a great job of not even thinking about work tomorrow, but as fate would have it, here it is again. Always ruining everything.
“Umm, not really,” I answer. “Uhh, not at all, actually.”
“Nah? Why not?”
“It’s just . . . work is hectic, and then there’s Damien and all that. I just . . . I don’t know. But, I don’t really want to talk about it. I just want to enjoy today. I’m just glad you’re here right now.”
Austin looks me in the eye and smiles that smile that gives me amnesia about the rest of my life. I settle back down and the anxiety about tomorrow dissipates.
“I’m glad I’m here, too,” he says with a smile. He swallows down the last bit of his food and washes it down with the rest of his Amaretto. “Okay, so you about done? It’s time for the next phase of the plans.”
“The next phase? Alright, moving right along. What’s next?” I finish my last bit of pasta and sit back as Austin takes the plates from the table and washes them off in the sink. He puts all of them in the dishwasher, then walks into the living room and invites me to join him on the couch.
“A little awkward being invited to sit on my own couch, but I’ll play along,” I joke as I sit next to him.
“Okay, so now it’s time for phase two.” Austin reaches into his pocket and pulls out a silver box. “So, I know you didn’t ask for a gift for your birthday, but I got you something anyway.”
“Austin, you didn’t have . . .”
“I know,” he interrupts. “I told you I wanted to. Happy birthday.”
Austin hands me the box and I pull off the lid. Inside is a silver charm bracelet. It has five charms on it: three silver plates in the center with words etched in them, and the two outer charms are butterflies. The words on the plates read Faith, Hope, and Strength. It’s absolutely beautiful.
“Oh my gosh, Austin,” I say, almost in a whisper. “I love it.”
“Good. I’m glad,” he says, his tone subdued to match mine. “When I saw it in the store, it made me think of you,
so I just had to get it for you.”
“What? How did this make you think of me?”
“Well, I remember the conversations we’ve had about your past—mainly your father and how you had to get away from all of that,” he says as he removes the bracelet from the box and starts to put it on my wrist. “The words faith, hope, and strength are what stood out to me at first, but then I saw the butterflies. You see, a caterpillar thinks that its life is over. It goes into its cocoon and thinks that’s it, but then when it comes out of the cocoon, it’s a beautiful butterfly. It’s stronger after leaving the cocoon than it was before it went in. As far as I’m concerned, there isn’t a better way to describe you. The strength it took to get yourself out of that situation with your father was unbelievable, and you’re a better, stronger person because of it. Then you did it again with your ex. You realized you were worth saving, and you found the strength to save yourself. That’s incredibly admirable, Layla. So, that’s why I had to get the bracelet for you.”
I feel a lump forming in my throat and it’s almost too big to swallow. I’ve never known someone who was able to be so thoughtful and who listened to me the way Austin does. He’s just incredible, and I’m so glad I met him that night in Stacy’s Bar.
“You’re amazing, Austin,” I hear myself say. “Thank you so much.”
“You’re very welcome,” he replies just as a tear rolls out of my left eye and slides down my cheek. Austin reaches up and wipes it away. “So, is it okay for me to move into phase three now?”
Still caught up in the moment and glaring at the gorgeous bracelet, I hear myself say yes. Then next thing I feel is Austin’s hand on my chin, lifting my head so that my eyes meet his. Then, he slowly leans in and softly presses his lips to mine. It’s not the first time we’ve kissed, obviously, but it feels like it. My heart accelerates and my skin heats up as he pulls my body closer to his, and I can feel the warmth emanating from him. His breathing is heavy and mine mirrors his, and I suddenly feel like I have no control over myself. Our hands clasp and we squeeze each other, completely overcome with passion and intensity.