Beyond the Cut

by Sarah Castille

  He knew what she wanted to hear, but he couldn’t say it. And if they faced the same situation again, he would make the same decision. “I can’t give you what you want, sweetheart. I can’t put you in danger. My dad beat on my mom for as long as I could remember, and until I turned fourteen there was nothing I could do to protect her. Even when I was strong enough to stop him, she wouldn’t leave. When she finally did leave, she went back. I could never understand why. And in the end she died by his hand. So now I got a need to protect you that is part of my soul. Whether you want it or not, I’m gonna keep you safe.”

  He tagged her around the waist, drew her close, bent down and rested his forehead against hers, grounding himself in the moment, savoring the feel of her soft body in his arms.

  “I’m sorry about your mom.” She slid her arms around his waist and hugged him tight. “I understand why she didn’t leave. It’s a cycle, Cade, and you can’t see your way out. For the longest time, I believed the horrible things Jimmy said about me. I believed I was worthless and every day I stayed made me feel even more humiliated about the fact I hadn’t run away the day before. It was only when he turned on the girls that I broke free. I survived and found my worth and made a life for myself. That’s why it was important to me that you didn’t think I was a liability. I will never be that woman again.”

  “Never thought you were a liability.” He pulled her against his chest. “Just wanted you to be safe.” And then, because he wanted to see her smile, he said. “But you can’t shoot for shit.”

  “I’ll learn.”

  “How ‘bout I take you somewhere we can warm you up first. Then you can tell me what happened in there, ’cause I’ve got a feeling Benson’s not gonna be too keen to let me inside. After that, we can do some shooting.”

  She looked up at him and licked her lips. “Is there some hot sex in a bed involved?”

  Cade rumbled his satisfaction. “Sweetheart, I don’t need a bed.”

  “Dawn?” Benson came around the corner, his shiny deputy badge glinting under the streetlight. “Are you ready to go?”

  Dawn turned to face him and Cade clamped an arm around her waist and pulled her tight against his chest, pleased when Benson’s smile faded.

  Mine.

  “Actually, um … I’m going with Cade. But thank you for the offer, and for coming out here tonight. You’ve been such a good friend to me.”

  Benson’s lips thinned. “Friendship doesn’t seem to matter when there are bikers around who make a mockery of our laws and lure women into a violent world with promises they’ll never keep. Think about what you’re doing, Dawn.” His voice took on a sharp edge, and the hair on the back of Cade’s neck stood on end. “I’m certain Jimmy came here tonight because of your involvement with the Sinners. You tried so hard to get away from that world and make a good, stable life for you and your girls. Don’t throw it all away.”

  “I appreciate your concern,” she said sharply. “But I can make my own choices.”

  Cade drew in a deep breath and his hands clenched into fists. Only Dawn’s quiet “hush” stopped him from shoving his fist down Benson’s throat. Yes, the dude wanted her. But he was also trying to do his job and protect her. He just needed to understand that protecting Dawn was Cade’s job.

  * * *

  “A biker’s word is his bond.” Jagger folded his arms and leaned back in his chair in the boardroom. “I’m not about to go back on my word because Mad Dog broke into Dawn’s house.”

  “He’s taking advantage of the fact he’s untouchable.” Cade could barely contain his ire. The early-morning meeting wasn’t going the way he’d hoped. In other words, Jagger wouldn’t back down.

  “If we can’t keep him out of town, she’s in danger. He attacked her outside the bar, showed up at the police station … He thinks she belongs to him and he just won’t quit. By making him untouchable, we’ve taken away the only safety she had.”

  Jagger held up a warning hand. “I know how many times he’s been here. And every time I have the same need as you to hunt him down, but we made a deal with Wolf and I’m not about to break my word. You agreed to this, Cade. We all did.”

  Gunner, silent until now, along with the rest of the brothers at the table, exhaled a breath. “Wolf broke the deal when he sent us up north for weapons that weren’t there.”

  “He says he doesn’t know what happened to the weapons. He’s looking into it.”

  “And you fucking believe him?” Cade stood abruptly, no longer able to contain his anger.

  “Of course not. Dax is going to interrogate Matchstick today about what he knows, and you and Zane can do some investigating when you take a team up to Whitefish to deal with the Demon Spawn betrayal. But the Jacks are clearly stronger than we thought if they could launch the kind of attack they did last night. We have to retaliate but we have to be smart.”

  “I’ll start asking questions about where the Jacks are drumming up their new supporters,” Zane said. “I didn’t recognize some of the patches on the guys who were in the raid last night.”

  “How about we just tell the Brethren where to fucking go?”

  Jagger regarded Cade with a damn irritating calm, implacable expression. “Do you really want to risk sending the Brethren running into their arms? Wolf has another weapons shipment coming in and he’s arranged for it to be delivered straight to us. We can use those weapons in a new offensive. The election is coming up in three weeks. After Wolf’s presidency is secure, we patch the Brethren in and the deal no longer stands. That’s when we tell them where to fucking go. Mad Dog dies that day, and no other.”

  “I can’t sit by and let him harass her.” Cade shoved his chair against the table. “I can’t be with her every minute of the day, and he always shows up when I’m not there. And does anyone wonder how he knew to break into her house when we were all busy with the Jacks? I think he knew about the raid.”

  “He’s the one pushing to join the Jacks,” Zane said. “Maybe he has a connection. Maybe he’s made the same kind of deal with Viper that Wolf has made with us: If he wins the election, he’ll patch the club over to the Jacks.”

  Jagger shook his head. “Wolf says he doesn’t have that kind of support, and from what I’ve heard from other clubs, that’s true. He’d have to win over the senior patch or buy up a lot of votes to beat a ten-year president who rebuilt the club. And as Cade said, Mad Dog doesn’t want a patch-over. He’s young. He wants to lead. At best, he’ll have made a deal to be a support club. We’ll deal with that problem when the time comes, but for now, we don’t touch him.”

  “Fuck.” Cade wanted nothing more than to yank open the door and leave the goddamn board behind, but Jagger hadn’t adjourned the meeting and he didn’t want to put his good friend Gunner in the position of having to deal with his breach of the rules. “How can I protect her if my hands are tied? I shoulda voted to off him that very first day.”

  “Then we would be having a very different conversation right now,” Jagger said. “The Brethren would have been part of the attack last night. We barely fought off the Jacks as it was.”

  “Why are you so damn riled?” Gunner’s forehead creased with a frown. “It’s not like she’s your old lady. You never cared this much about the other women you took to bed…”

  “What if she was?” He felt the rightness of the idea the moment he spoke the words. “She would be entitled to Sinner protection as my old lady.”

  Jagger quirked an appreciative eyebrow. “Mad Dog would no longer suffer under the illusion that Dawn belonged to him. And if he did harass her, you could act to defend your old lady, regardless of the agreement we made with the Brethren.”

  “No fucking way.” Gunner shot out of his seat. “You can’t take an old lady. You’re you. You got a rep to protect. And who am I gonna go drinking with? We got parties lined up every weekend for the next couple of months. And the twins with the biggest—”

  “It wouldn’t be permanent,” Cade said quickly.
“Just until Mad Dog is no longer a threat.”

  “I’m good with that,” Jagger settled back in his chair. “Dawn’s got herself in a bad situation and Arianne has been harassing me about our decision not to touch Mad Dog for the last few weeks.”

  “What does Dawn think of this idea?” Zane voiced the question on everyone’s lips.

  “I haven’t asked her.” Cade inhaled and released a long breath. “Might take a lot of convincing because she’s made it pretty damn clear she isn’t interested in being anyone’s old lady.”

  “I got faith in you, brother.” Jagger gave him a wicked smile. “If anyone can convince a woman to do anything, it’s you.”

  * * *

  “Dawn. Wake up.”

  Half asleep in Cade’s bed, his warm, naked body tucked around her, Dawn wasn’t inclined to climb out of her cave of oblivion. “Sleeping,” she mumbled.

  “Babe. I need to talk to you.” He turned her gently, resting her head on his shoulder so he could harass her face-to-face. “I couldn’t sleep.”

  “I wasn’t having any problems.” She squeezed her eyes closed and buried her face in his neck, breathing in his warm masculine scent. She’d dragged herself to work in the morning, stumbled through her job in the afternoon, spent a few hours sorting her house while the workmen changed the locks and window, and barely made it through her shift at the bar before Cade picked her up and took her back to the clubhouse.

  Too tired to eat, she’d allowed him to put her to bed, expecting to sleep until the sun came up.

  Apparently, Cade had other ideas, and now that she was awake, she had some ideas, too.

  “I know a cure for insomnia.” She eased herself on top of him, perversely pleased she’d gone to bed without any clothes. Cradling his hips with her thighs, she slid down until he was perfectly placed, his semi-erect shaft nestled against the curve of her sex.

  Cade groaned. “You’re making this hard.”

  “Yes, I am.” She wiggled on top of him, delighted at his instant response. One thing about Cade, he could perform at a moment’s notice.

  “What happened last night at your house, can’t happen again.” Cade stroked his hand down her back. “I can’t touch him, but I can’t sit back and let him threaten you, either. It’s gone too far.”

  “What are you going to do?”

  He spread his legs, parting her wide, and his cock slid through her wet folds. “I’ve thought of another way.”

  “What way? And don’t think I don’t realize you’re trying to distract me.”

  Cade leaned up and caught her nipple between his teeth, licking and sucking until she moaned. “You’re gonna be my old lady.”

  “I don’t want to be your old lady.” She reared back, her breath catching in her throat. “I don’t want to be anyone’s old lady. Been there. Done that. Got the bruises and the emotional trauma to show it.”

  “Shhhh, babe.” Cade’s strong arms wrapped around her and he pulled her down to his chest. “It won’t be permanent. Right now, Mad Dog still thinks you’re his, and he’s using the pass Wolf bought him to ride freely through town. That puts you in danger. So we make him understand you’re taken and he’s got no claim on you. And if he does come near you again, I can deal with him without going against the club ’cause I’m defending my old lady. No one fucks with a biker’s old lady.”

  “I haven’t even gotten used to the fact that we occasionally have hot sex. Being an old lady is too big a step. I can’t deal with the violence, Cade. I can’t be part of this world again.”

  He rocked his hips against her, his erection sliding against her clit. “You’re gonna say yes, because you can’t fight Jimmy alone. He’s part of the Brethren and to stand a chance you need a club on your side. And it’s not forever. There’s an election coming up and once it’s done and the Brethren patch over to us, Mad Dog is dead. You’ll be safe and … “He hesitated. “The Sinners can help you get your girls back.”

  Now that caught her interest. “How?”

  “’Cause if you’re a Sinner, then they are Sinners. Shelly-Ann can’t hold them for fucking ransom, and no one’s gonna do shit if I pick them up and bring them home. This is a Sinner town and the cops and social services will have to toe the fucking line.”

  “I’m going to say no.” She pushed up, trying to get his cock where she wanted it to go. Although tempting, his solution didn’t address the fact there was a court decision out there that said she was an unfit mother. If this ended when Jimmy died—and she didn’t want to think about being in any way complicit in his death—then she’d be on her own again and the authorities could still take her girls away.

  But oh, for a chance …

  Cade gave her an evil grin, then rolled until he was on top of her, his shaft hard and heavy between her legs. “If you want a taste of me, you’re gonna have to be mine.”

  Desire curled through Dawn’s belly, and she squeezed her eyes shut. “Maybe I don’t want a taste of you. Maybe I just want to go to sleep and pretend this conversation never happened.”

  He eased to the side then thrust a thick finger into her wetness. “You’re gonna say yes, sweetheart, because by the time I’m done, you won’t be able to say anything else.”

  “If you’re planning to sex me into agreeing to be your old lady, then there’s something I want,” she said as a plan formulated in her mind.

  Cade kicked her legs apart and pressed the head of his shaft against her entrance. “And you’ll get it when you say yes.”

  “That’s not what I mean. I know someone who might know how to find Jimmy’s private investigator, or the identity of the person who filmed the fake drug deal behind the school. If I could find at least one person who could testify it was all a setup, I would feel better about your promise to get my girls back because then I wouldn’t have to worry about the police or courts taking them away. Ever.”

  “The people who were involved in that scam aren’t the kind of people who are going to stand up in court and confess.”

  Dawn heaved a sigh, her arousal fading. “I have to try. I can’t live under the shadow of that decision. And I’m not about to do anything stupid. I’m just going to have a conversation, but it isn’t with someone I can see alone.”

  Cade’s eyes darkened and his arms came up around her. “Who do you want to see?”

  “Bunny.” A shady underworld kingpin and sometime human trafficker, with connections everywhere, Bunny was a man who traded in information. He knew everyone and everything. If you wanted something, he could get it. If you needed information, he knew it. But his services came with a price.

  A price Dawn had already paid. Bunny had her mark, and it was time to call it in.

  “Son of a bitch.” Cade’s muscles bunched under her hands. “No. Absolutely not. No fucking way are you gonna see that slime-sucking dirt bag. Look what happened to Arianne.”

  “He’s not the one who chained her in his basement and tried to sell her into slavery. That was her brother. And that other guy, the ex-Sinner who tried to slit her throat…”

  “Axle.”

  “Jeff and Axle were the ones who hurt her. Bunny saved her.”

  Cade gave an irritated snort. “Only because Jagger beat the shit out of him after you brought Arianne to him to negotiate a deal.”

  “He owes me, Cade. Jimmy made me dance. At strip clubs.” Her words came out so fast they ran over one another. This was a part of her life she didn’t want to share, but Cade had opened up about his past and she wanted to do the same. “Bunny had a table at the club where I danced. We had an arrangement Jimmy didn’t know about. So now I can call in a favor. If you don’t come with me, then Arianne will.”

  “He saw you naked.”

  She knew from his tone of voice exactly where this conversation was going to go. “Yes.”

  “No.”

  “I was asking for your help. Not your permission.” Dawn glared, although it wasn’t easy to be angry when he was naked, on top of h
er, and their heated conversation had clearly not diminished his arousal in the least.

  “You get neither.”

  “Then you don’t get an old lady.” She tilted her hips until he was poised at her entrance. “And you don’t get your sexy times.”

  “That was supposed to be my line.”

  Dawn eased down the tiniest bit. “Say yes, Cade, or we’re both going to suffer.”

  He thrust deep and hard, filling her so completely she almost came right then.

  “Yes,” he said.

  Dawn leaned up and kissed him. “Yes.”

  TWELVE

  I will ride until the ride is done, and then I’ll ride again.

  SINNER’S TRIBE CREED

  Saturday night. Party night.

  At least for the brothers without old ladies. For the brother whose impulsive nature had landed him with an old lady who didn’t want to be an old lady at all, the party Jagger had staged for the big announcement of Cade’s new “old man” status was a sedate affair. Sure the sweet butts, lays, house mamas, and hang-arounds had been invited, and as usual they were dressed to undress in skimpy minis and tiny tanks, but it was hands off for Cade and hands on for the unattached brothers in Riders Bar.

  Cade had spent last night at the clubhouse, catching up with his executive board work. His aptitude for numbers had made him a natural for the position as treasurer, but he wasn’t looking forward to sharing the news that their finances had taken a massive hit as a result of the war with the Jacks. Unfortunately, the time alone had made him second-guess his plan to make Dawn his pretend old lady.

  What the hell had he been thinking, baring his soul to her the other night? No one knew about his parents. Not even Jagger. And he didn’t want her sympathy. He’d dealt with that situation and moved on. After he’d received the letter about his mother’s death, he never returned to his hometown, never contacted his father in jail; hell, he’d never even visited his mother’s grave. Even when his aunt emailed a few years later to tell him his father died of a heart attack in prison he hadn’t gone home for the funeral.