Beyond the Cut

by Sarah Castille

  “Do I get my loan?”

  Cade chuckled. “Sweetheart, after that, I’d bring you the fucking moon if I could fly.”

  Her body relaxed in the cradle of his arms and she sighed in contentment as his fingers stroked gently up and down her back. “I could stay like this forever.”

  “So could I.” He pressed a soft kiss to her forehead. “Stay with me, Dawn. Even after this is all over, I want you to wear my cut.”

  She didn’t know what to say, so she said nothing. She had managed to hold her fear at bay when this was all pretend, when she knew it wouldn’t last. But now that he’d made it real, she had nowhere to hide. She cared about him, no doubt about that, but the depth of her emotion scared her. Was she really ready to do it all again? Did she trust him enough to let go and jump into the biker life for good?

  NINETEEN

  I will never be the aggressor. Unless someone fucks with me. Then they will pay.

  SINNER’S TRIBE CREED

  “Mom. There’s someone in your bed.”

  Dawn awakened to Maia’s concerned face—her beautiful, angelic face—and Cade wrapped around her, his arm tight between her breasts, his head on her pillow, his erection pressed up against her ass. Thank God the covers were drawn around them.

  “Is it Jimmy?”

  “No, darling. It’s … Cade.”

  Tia joined her sister staring down at them and frowned. She was always frowning, which made it easy to tell the twins apart.

  “Why is he sleeping in your bed?” Maia asked.

  She could feel Cade chuckling behind her, his chest warm against her back.

  “Um … we’re having a … sleepover.”

  “Can I have a sleepover with Susie?” Maia sat on the edge of the bed. “Shelly-Ann wouldn’t let us have sleepovers but now that we’re home, I want a sleepover, too.”

  Cade ground his shaft gently against her ass and she choked back a gasp. “How about we talk it over at breakfast? You have to get ready for school. Both of you go brush your teeth and you can talk to Cade when he … gets up.”

  “I’m already up.” His breath on the back of her neck reminded her of their heated night together, and she shivered. “And I thought you locked the door.”

  “I did lock the door. You unlocked it when you went to get rid of the condom. I hope you remembered…”

  “Mom.”

  “Fuck.” Cade rolled away. “I think I forgot to…”

  “Mom.”

  “Christ. This is more stressful than a shoot-out.” He sat on the edge of the bed and scrubbed his hands over his face.

  “No swearing around the girls. And no more inappropriate behavior.” Dawn pushed herself up. She would have been totally screwed if it was Saturday and she had to work at the diner. With no one to look after the children, she would have had to take a few days off. And what about this afternoon when she had to work at the florist? Or tonight when she had to work at Banks Bar? She’d spent so much time dreaming about her children coming home, she hadn’t thought through the practicalities. Maybe because a part of her thought it would never really happen. And another part was convinced it was all a dream.

  “Mom.” Maia’s voice grew louder and Dawn’s eyes widened.

  “Pants.”

  “Door.” Cade reached for his jeans and Dawn threw herself at the door, just before Maia arrived.

  “I’ll be out in a moment, darling.”

  “Hell … I mean … damn, this is going to take some getting used to.” Cade pulled on his shirt.

  Dawn grabbed some clean clothes from her drawer and slipped on her robe. Her PJs were lost somewhere in the bed. Or maybe on the floor. “I need to take a shower. Are you going to be okay with the girls for a few minutes? You’ve never been alone with them before…”

  “I know everything about big girls,” he said. “I figure they gotta be much the same.”

  * * *

  After ten minutes alone with Maia and Tia, Cade revised his assessment of little girls. They were nothing like big girls. And the fact that they seemed totally immune to his charms this morning just made the situation worse. Winks and slow smiles, a slight drawl and a full-on swagger didn’t even come close to winning them over like he had at the zoo and the park. In fact, the harder he tried to engage them, the more cutting Maia became. Tia hadn’t said a word to him since he’d joined them in the kitchen. Maybe they didn’t like him sleeping over.

  “Do you have a car?” Maia sat on the counter and kicked her legs, her little heels banging against the dishwasher while Cade searched the cupboards for something to give them to eat.

  “Just my bike.”

  “Bikes are cool,” she said. “But men who don’t have cars are not cool. Real men have cars. That way they can get groceries when it rains.”

  “Good to know.”

  “I saw your bike when you came to the park.” She slid off the counter as Cade pulled out a box of cereal. “I liked it. Tia thought it was too shiny. Maybe you can give us a ride sometime.”

  “I don’t know if your mom would like that.” He found the bowls and filled them to the top. How much cereal did kids eat? He had no clue, but if he filled the bowls to the top they wouldn’t go hungry.

  “She lets us do what we want because she doesn’t get to see us very much. That’s Jimmy’s fault. He’s a bastard.”

  Cade found milk in the fridge and filled up the bowls. “I thought you weren’t allowed to swear.”

  “It’s not a swear if it’s true and that’s what everyone calls him. Even Shelly-Ann. Jimmy’s a bad person. He hurts people. He hurt Mom and us. He hurt Shelly-Ann, too, because she lost his money, but then she remembered Mom had it so he left her alone.”

  Was that the money Mad Dog was after? Why hadn’t Dawn told him about it?

  “You call him Jimmy, not Dad?” He put the bowls on the table and puffed out his chest. Success. This wasn’t so hard after all.

  Maia fiddled with the strap of the bag slung across her shoulder, a small black beaded purse with a skull emblazoned on the front. “Just because we’re related to him doesn’t mean we have to call him Dad. He doesn’t act like a dad. Dads look after you, and take you places, and spend time with you, and make sure bad things don’t happen. Plus, Jimmy hates us. He tells us that every time we see him.”

  Lost for words, Cade stared at Maia. He didn’t have the heart to tell her good dads were few and far between. His dad sure wasn’t one of them.

  “Sucks,” he said, for lack of anything better to say, or any wisdom to impart.

  “Spoon.”

  “What?”

  “Spoon,” Maia said. “Are we supposed to slurp the cereal out of the bowl?”

  “Maia. Manners.” Dawn appeared in the doorway wearing a filmy white blouse he could almost see through and a short, tight skirt that hugged every delicious curve of her body. Her hair was loose and partially dried, the soft golden curls hanging just above the crescents of her breasts. His groin tightened and he turned away to get himself under control.

  “You got some sweats, babe? Maybe a sack?” He turned on the cold water and splashed his face. “We’re a dress-down kinda club. Like hide-all-the-good-bits kinda dress down, especially when you’re in public or there’s brothers around.”

  “Why is your face red?” Maia chewed her cereal staring at him with the kind of gaze that could send a man to his knees. Christ. If they were his, looking as pretty as they looked now, he’d have to barricade the door when they were teenagers. He couldn’t imagine how his brothers with teenage girls handled the boys who came around. He’d probably just fire off a coupla shots and keep the bastards away.

  “It’s … hot in here.”

  Tia lifted an eyebrow but said nothing. He had a feeling that he’d just been judged and found wanting although he didn’t know how. After all, he’d managed to fix them breakfast.

  “Gotta get going,” he said. “Got some work to do. See you later, ladies.” That got him a few smiles and g
iggles. At least he hadn’t totally lost his touch.

  Dawn followed him to the door and leaned against the wall while he pulled on his boots, her folded arms highlighting the delicious curve of her breasts.

  “You working at the florist this afternoon? And then at the bar?”

  “Yes.” She ran her hand through her curls and her blouse opened just enough to send all his blood rushing to his cock.

  Fuck. He had to get out of here or he’d be dragging her back to the bedroom and the kids would never make it to school.

  “It all happened so fast I never thought about child care,” she said. “But I just called Martha, a retired neighbor who lives a couple of houses down the street. She used to watch the girls for me before Jimmy took them away. She said she could come over today.”

  “I’ll look after them this afternoon.”

  Dawn hesitated. “You? Are you sure? I mean…”

  “I got them breakfast. No one died. I can handle a coupla hours.” He dug into his pocket and held up his hand. “And I got a key. I’ll make sure Tank and T-Rex are outside watching the block. You can trust me, sweetheart.”

  Her face lit up with a smile that almost stopped his heart, and she leaned up to kiss his cheek. “They get out of school at three-thirty. They’ll need a snack. No treats.”

  “Might have to feed them some sugar to keep them sweet, so I won’t make any promises.” He wrapped an arm around her waist, pulling her against him. His cock throbbed and he groaned.

  “What’s wrong?” Dawn’s eyes lit with amusement. She knew damn well what was wrong.

  “You. Too sexy. Waking up this morning with your little ass grindin’ into me … seeing you dressed like this. Too much.”

  She twirled a curl around her finger. “I thought when you saw me with the kids you’d wonder what the hell you were doing with a mom of two when you have a club full of sweet butts fighting for your bed.”

  He heard the waver in her tone. Saw her vulnerability. And yet nothing could have been farther from the truth. He cupped her face between his hands and leaned down to kiss her. He wanted to tell her how beautiful she was to him, inside and out, and how the fact she had kids made no difference to him. He wanted to tell her how he loved her sweetly rounded curves and how he liked the idea she had created such beauty with her body. But he suspected it wouldn’t come out right. He wasn’t an eloquent man. So he just said, “You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.” And then he kissed her again and walked out the door.

  * * *

  “This here’s an axle.” Cade pointed out the part on his bike to his two attentive young students, sitting side by side on the grass in the back lane behind Dawn’s house. T-Rex and Tank were parked in the alley, close enough he could hear them snickering.

  “You have those tattooed on your chest,” Maia said. “I saw them this morning. And wings. Blue ones.”

  “Well, now. You shouldn’t be looking at my tat. It’s not for little girls to see.”

  “Why?”

  Cade gritted his teeth. Over the last few hours he’d grown to hate that question. Maia had an uncanny ability to detect when he was trying to be evasive and called him out every time. Who knew seven-year-olds could be so smart?

  “Some things are for grown-ups to see and some things are for little girls to see.”

  “Why did you get it if everyone can’t see it? You have another one on your back, but it has cuts on it. Why did you need two?”

  He scrubbed a hand over his face. Why did he need two? Every full-patch got a Sinner’s Tribe tattoo, usually on his back. It represented a lifelong commitment to the club. But the second tat had been all his. The wings for freedom, blue for the sky, and the axles for his bike. No ties. No commitments. No one to answer to. Just him and the bike and the open sky.

  “’Cause I wanted it just for me and for people I wanted to share it with.”

  “Not us?” Her mouth turned down and Tia’s mouth turned down, too. One voice with two faces. Maybe one day Tia would trust him enough to talk to him. He hadn’t lied when he told Dawn he thought she had a lot to say.

  “Fuck. Don’t look at me like that. You’ll break my goddamn heart.”

  Maia’s eyes lit up. “You swore in front of us. Let us see your tat or we’ll tell Mom.”

  Christ. Blackmailed by a seven-year-old. And with witnesses. He’d never live it down.

  “Okay. Just for a minute.” He removed his cut and tugged his shirt over his head. The two girls stood to stare at his tat.

  “Can we touch it?”

  “No.”

  Maia frowned. “Why? Are you poisonous?”

  “Not that I know.”

  She stood up on tiptoe and poked his chest. Cade froze. What the hell was he supposed to do now? He lunged forward and the girls shrieked and ran away.

  “Hey, Cade. You’re losing your touch,” Tank yelled. “Girls are supposed to run toward you.”

  “Fuck off.” He pulled on his shirt and cut and grabbed a polishing cloth. Dawn was due home any moment and he’d already run out of things to do. They’d watched TV, played a video game, and eaten the box of donuts he’d brought with him. But when they asked him to play princesses, he took them out to help him with his bike instead. Bike polishing had seemed a safe and useful activity. Now he wished he’d put on that princess crown.

  “Can we sit on your bike?” Maia rested her little hand on his seat.

  Cade shook his head. “Only a biker sits in his saddle. His old lady rides in the pillion seat.”

  “Is Mom your old lady?”

  Unable to resist her pleading look, he lifted her onto the pillion seat while he scrambled for an answer to her question. She was so small and light he was almost afraid he would crush her with his big hands. “You’ll have to ask her.”

  “She is,” Maia settled on the seat. “We saw her leather vest. It says PROPERTY OF CADE. That means she belongs to you.”

  “I guess that’s right.” He lifted her off and held out his hands for Tia, but she shook her head and backed away.

  “So if Mom belongs to you, we belong to you.” Wise beyond her years, Maia continued with the awkward conversation despite Cade’s less-than-forthcoming answers.

  “It’s not really like…”

  “So you have to protect us.” She cut him off. “You have to look after Mom and us because that’s what you do when someone is yours.”

  Cade dropped to a crouch in front of the two little girls. “I’ll protect you and your mom. If something bad happens and you need me, I’ll be there.”

  “Even from Jimmy?”

  “Even from Jimmy.”

  Maia cocked her head to the side. “Promise.”

  “You have my word,” Cade said. “A biker’s word is his bond. That means you can count on it.”

  She smiled, the same devastating smile as Dawn. “Then I won’t tell Mom you swore at Tank and T-Rex.”

  “Thanks.”

  “Since we’re yours, can we have our own bikes so we can ride with you?”

  Cade closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He so knew what was coming.

  “No. Even if you were old enough to ride, I wouldn’t let you have a bike.” He polished the chrome until it gleamed in the sunlight.

  “Why?”

  “Because they’re dangerous and I promised to protect you.” He braced himself to be called out on his hypocrisy but she just kept going.

  “What about a leather vest? I want one that says PROPERTY OF TREVOR.”

  He squirted more polish on his cloth. “Who’s Trevor?”

  “My boyfriend. He pulls my hair in class and chases me around the playground at lunch.”

  Cade put down the bottle of polish, his brow creasing in a frown. “Does he live nearby?”

  “No.”

  “I’ll come by the playground tomorrow. Point him out to me and I’ll make him stop.”

  “I don’t want him to stop.” Maia put a hand on her hip and gave an affected sigh. “
Don’t you know anything about girls?”

  He thought he did. Apparently, he was wrong.

  * * *

  “Mommy.”

  Dawn waved to Maia and Tia from the back lawn. She’d been watching Cade polish his bike with her girls ever since she got off the bus and her heart warmed at how well they got on together. Even Tia, although she didn’t talk, stayed by his side.

  A family. Just like you always wanted. Jimmy’s taunt flitted through her brain. She bet he’d never imagined she would have a family like this, albeit a temporary one.

  Or was it? Their talk last night was all about a future together. But they hadn’t addressed the elephant in the room. What would happen when it was all over? Was he really thinking of becoming a one-woman man and settling down?

  Tank and T-Rex were chatting at the far end of the lane, looking less than enthused that they’d pulled guard duty. Dawn crossed the grass and stepped out of the small gate separating her property from the back lane. She’d taken the evening off so she could spend time with the girls, and she could hardly wait to tell them.

  She closed the gate behind her, startling when she heard the rev of an engine. A black van sped down the lane so fast it left a trail of dust behind. Cade reached out and yanked the girls to safety. Dawn froze when the van screeched to a halt. Moments later the back door opened and a body rolled out and onto the gravel.

  Shocked, Dawn could only stare as the van took off down the lane, racing full tilt at Tank and T-Rex. They scrambled to safety and then took off after the van, the rev of their engines echoing through the alley.

  Maia and Tia ran across the road and into her arms. As the dust cleared, Dawn took in the body, now slumped beside Cade’s bike, with the letters MD spray-painted on his back. She knew that sign. MD for “Mad Dog.” Her muscles went taut and she shoved the girls behind her.

  “Go inside.” Dawn tried to keep her voice from wavering. “Go to your bedroom and lock the door.”

  “But is he okay?” Maia tried to look back over her shoulder. “Should we call 911?”

  “No. Cade and I will look after him. Inside. Now.” She hadn’t meant to shout, but the words came out in a rush of fear.