Once Burned

by Suzie O'Connell

  True to form, Evie immediately launched a lengthy inquiry into Lindsay’s relationship with Henry, and the more she learned, the more excited she became until Lindsay had to tell her to calm down.

  “Sorry, Linds, I can’t. I’m just too happy for you.”

  “Well, don’t get your hopes up too high yet.”

  “Too late.” She grinned, then hugged Lindsay again. “I just knew he’d be the one to help you unpack all that baggage you’ve been carrying around for the last eight years. You just wait and see, Linds. I bet you’ll have a ring on your finger before too much longer. And that sparkle in your eyes right now says a whole lot. You’re hoping I’m right, aren’t you?”

  “I’ve tried to enjoy the moment and not overthink this like I tend to overthink everything, but yeah, I’m hopeful. He’s great with Noah, and he makes me feel….” Lindsay glanced at Henry, who was currently talking with his twin and Skye about who knew what, though she suspected by their animated expressions that the topic was likely Skye’s new photography endeavor and the possible business venture for Lindsay. Damn, he was sexy. All the Hammond boys were, but Henry had a roguish flair that set him apart from his brothers, a wild and adventurous spirit that burned brighter in him than in either Nick or Aaron and drew her like a moth.

  “He makes you feel… what?” Evie prodded.

  “Everything,” Lindsay said simply, returning her attention to her friend. “Loved, adored, strong, capable, hopeful… everything.”

  Evie squealed quietly, and promised she’d leave Lindsay and Henry alone for now.

  Nick and Beth showed up then with their son Will in tow, and Lindsay watched Noah and his new friends while her discussion with Skye about the Ramshorn’s need of a caterer flirting with her mind. She wanted it, there was no doubt about that, but no matter how she tried to figure her way through making it work, all she found were the same walls and doubts blocking her. So, for the time being, she pushed it from her mind and focused instead on the love and laughter that filled the air around her.

  She loved her family’s holidays, but they’d always been somewhat small and quiet—just her parents, her Aunt Jeanie and her daughter Jasmine, her grandparents, Noah, and her. This noisy gathering was something new and wonderful, and she would love to get used to it. Her parents and Henry’s seemed to be kindred spirits, and Noah, Will, and Jessie were getting along fabulously as well. When Aaron and Skye announced their engagement, the congratulations and love offered to them washed over Lindsay as well. She could easily picture spending every Christmas like this, with these people.

  Henry found her hand and gave it a squeeze, then kissed her cheek. “Having a good time?”

  “I’m having the best time of my life,” she replied honestly. “I love this, and I love you.”

  “That’s good… because I love you, too. And so do they.” He leaned back in his chair and folded his hand behind his head as the gleam of adoration danced in his eyes. “Think about that for a second. Every single person at this table loves you, Lindsay.”

  “It’s incredible.” She leaned into his side, and he tucked his arms around her. “Noah’s right. This is already the best Christmas ever… or the best one yet.”

  He kissed her soundly with everyone at the table watching. “I like hearing you say that.”

  * * *

  It was one of those sharply clear blue and white days, and despite the bitter temperatures, Henry wasn’t ready to head back to the house yet and the reason why was now rolling down Aspen Creek Road. His horse shifted beneath him while he sat motionless and watched the familiar SUV pull up in front of his house. Even at this distance, he knew it belonged to Doug; the customized paint job—matte black with flake metal red scallops on the hood outlined in silver—was instantly recognizable.

  “This was a bad idea,” he said, suddenly queasy.

  “Too late now to change your mind,” Lindsay replied. “I’m guessing that’s them.”

  “Yeah.”

  “Who?” Noah asked.

  “My ex, her boyfriend, and their son.”

  “The son you thought was yours but wasn’t?”

  “Yep.”

  Lindsay glanced sharply at Henry. “You told him about that?”

  He winced. “Just the bare minimum that night you called Max to tell him about Christmas. I should’ve asked your permission before I did, and I’m sorry, but it proved a point.”

  “Don’t worry, Mom,” Noah said. “He just told me that he’d been hurt by someone like Dad and Logan hurt you and that she made him believe he had a son when he didn’t. That’s all.”

  “What was the point it proved?”

  “That I needed to wait and give you two time to make sure you dating each other wasn’t a mistake like those other times.”

  “I suppose I’m going to have to get used to you two having these kinds of boy talks, huh?”

  “Yep,” Noah replied cheerfully. “Isn’t that a good thing?”

  Smiling, Lindsay nodded. “Yes, it is, and you’re going to need it more and more as you get older because I can’t teach you everything you’ll need to know about being a good man.”

  “I bet you could,” Henry said. “My mother taught me just as much or more than my father did.”

  “I bet she could, too,” Noah agreed. “But I bet having you both will be even better.”

  “Thanks, bud.” Henry glanced back at his house and sighed. “I suppose we should get this over with.”

  He touched his heels to his horse’s sides, and the gelding lurched forward at a lope. Lindsay and Noah nudged their mounts forward, following close behind him. The powdery snow that had made their drive from Washington so miserable and piled up almost two feet in the two days since their arrival churned beneath the horses’ hooves in glittering clouds. Lindsay was much more comfortable on the back of her mount than she’d been on her first horseback ride in August, and she hadn’t been exactly uneasy then, either. He liked they way she had settled right back into life here in Northstar and the way the strain that was her constant companion in Washington had fallen away again. Was that because she’d known only happiness and relaxation here, making it easier to forget the worries in her life? Or was it more than that?

  Those questions and the myriad of others he had about their future—the logistics of it, anyhow, because he was certain now that she and her son were his future no matter where they landed—would have to wait until he finally and firmly closed the door on his past. And that’s just what he intended to do today when he sat down with Mel and Doug. It didn’t matter what they had to say to him. He was done with that part of his life and moving forward into the next chapter.

  Of course, the real test would come when he saw Dylan again. No matter how hard he’d tried to push that little boy out of his heart, it couldn’t be done.

  “You all right?” Lindsay asked as they rode toward his house. “Because your face is about three shades paler than it was a minute ago.”

  “I’m not looking forward to this,” he admitted.

  “If it makes you feel any better, I’m not, either.”

  “No, it doesn’t make me feel better. It makes me feel worse because I shouldn’t be dragging you through a mess that should’ve been cleaned up before I even met you.”

  “You’re not dragging me through anything, Henry. I’m here for you just like you’ve been there for me since we first met.”

  They rode the rest of the way home in silence. Too soon, they had the horses unsaddled and turned loose in the corral behind the house and were climbing the stairs to the back deck, stomping the snow from their boots. Mel and Doug were out front, sitting in the warmth of the SUV, and Henry was both grateful and mildly surprised Mel hadn’t let herself in. He’d left the front door unlocked like he always did when he was home in the valley, and she was familiar with that habit of his.

  As Henry, Lindsay, and Noah shed their coats and the rest of their winter clothing, Henry addressed Lindsay. “If you’
d rather Noah not be here for this, we can call Beth to come get him. I’m pretty sure she was planning to be home all afternoon today.”

  “If that wouldn’t be too much trouble,” Lindsay answered, “I think he might like to hang out with Will for a bit. Wouldn’t you, Noah?”

  “Yeah, that’d be fun.”

  “We’ll tell you what happens later, all right, bud?” Henry said.

  The boy nodded, and Henry called Beth while Noah donned the coat he’d taken off only moments ago. Beth said she’d be there in two minutes. Henry waited until his sister-in-law pulled up beside Doug’s SUV before he walked to the front door to beckon his guests in. Doug climbed out of his vehicle and followed Beth up the front steps. She offered little more than a nod in greeting.

  “If it’s all right with you, I’d like to wait until Beth and Noah leave,” Henry said the moment Doug stepped inside right behind Beth.

  “I don’t think anything we have to say would be too much for him, but I understand.”

  “Thanks.” Henry shook Doug’s hand. “Good to see you again, man.”

  “Yeah. It is.”

  “Beth, thank you. We’ll be down to get him as soon as we’re done here.”

  “I’m happy to do it, Henry. Having Noah over for a while will give me a few moments of peace from Will. Poor kid’s going stir crazy today, and I just don’t have the patience for it right now.”

  Beth not have patience? Henry frowned. Something tickled his mind, but he didn’t have time to explore it right now. “Everything all right?”

  “Everything’s just fine, Hen. You worry about yourself, and I’ll see you in a bit.”

  After Beth and Noah left, Lindsay leaned close to Henry. “She’s not pregnant, is she?”

  “Not that I’ve heard,” he replied, glancing out the window to watch his petite sister-in-law climb into her truck. Lindsay’s question put a name to the something that had distracted him a moment ago. “It’s possible. Nick let it slip a while back that they were thinking about trying for another baby.”

  “Oh, how fun.”

  “You wanna move out of the way of the door, Doug, so I can get Dylan in out of the cold?” came Mel’s voice, jerking Henry’s attention back to the matter at hand.

  “Oh, sorry, babe.”

  Doug jumped out of the way, yanking the door farther open and then closing it behind Mel. She looked exactly how she had when Henry had left except that she watched him with uncertainty instead of grief and glanced at Doug instead of Henry for reassurance. Henry felt nothing but the mild recognition of an old friend, but he’d expected that. He’d expected what happened as soon as he shifted his gaze to the dark-haired toddler clinging to his ex, too, but there was a world of difference between the expectation and the reality. His heart thudded as he took in the familiar but changed features of Dylan’s face. His gaze sidetracked briefly to Doug, and at once, he wondered why he’d never seen the resemblance between them because it was unmistakable.

  I didn’t see it because I didn’t look.

  “Christ, he’s grown so much,” he murmured, reaching for Lindsay’s hand for support.

  Recognizing his voice instantly, Dylan turned his brown eyes on Henry and reached for him, and when Mel didn’t move any closer, he whined. “Dada!”

  “No, honey. That’s not daddy, remember?” Mel corrected. “That’s Henry.”

  “No! Dada.”

  Doug’s face fell and he started toward the door, but Mel grabbed his arm with her free hand and stopped him. “We knew this was going to be difficult.”

  “And why is that, Mel?” Doug snapped over Dylan’s increasingly louder shouts. At once, he held up his hands. “I’m sorry. I promised I’d work on forgiving that, and I’m out of line.”

  “Mama! Down,” Dylan demanded, reaching again for Henry with enough strength that Mel had a hard time holding on to him. “Dada!”

  “Ah, Jesus.” Henry pulled a chair out from the dining room table and sank onto it. He couldn’t do this. Dylan’s cries cut straight to his soul, and every nerve through his neck and shoulders spasmed with each shriek until he hunched over his knees and curled his hands around his head in a useless attempt to block it out. Lindsay perched on his knees, forcing him to sit straighter as she folded her arms around him. At once, with the soft heat of her body to remind him that he didn’t have to do this alone, peace flowed through him, and he marveled at her influence over him.

  “I know how much you love him, Henry,” she whispered, resting a reassuring hand over his heart. “I can’t watch it tear you up, so stop fighting it and just take him. Please.”

  Lindsay stood but left her hand on his shoulder, and he held his hands out to Dylan. The second Mel set the toddler on the floor, he made a beeline for Henry. Swearing again, Henry murmured, “He was barely walking last time I saw him, and now look at him.”

  Dylan launched himself at Henry, trusting Henry to catch him. He did, hugging the little boy close, eyeing Doug, Mel, and Lindsay. Doug averted his gaze, and the muscle in his jaw worked. Mel didn’t look any less pained, but Lindsay’s expression was difficult to read. She was obviously uncomfortable, but there was a light in her eyes that he thought might be pride or even maternal gratification that the man she’d chosen as a mate would also be a devoted parent.

  With Dylan once again the happy, smiling boy Henry remembered, the tension and awkwardness left them all, and they gathered in the living room to discuss what had brought Mel and Doug to Montana. Henry held Dylan, who jabbered away about his favorite toy, and Lindsay sat beside close beside them on the couch with her feet tucked under her and an arm draped over Henry’s shoulder. Her posture was outwardly relaxed, but the way she watched Mel was anything but.

  “The first thing is this,” Mel said, slipping a manila envelope out of her diaper bag. She leaned across the coffee table to set it in front of Henry. “I decided to let Tam’s friend buy me out of the salon. You were right. I’m not cut out to be a business owner, and now that I’m back to being just a stylist, I’m so much happier.”

  Henry opened the envelope and pulled out a certified check. Instead of the nine thousand six hundred she still owed, it was for exactly ten thousand dollars. Frowning, he read the sticky note on it. What I still owe plus some interest. It was paper-clipped to a sheet of paper that was a fairly simple, straightforward letter stating that Mel had repaid in full the ten thousand dollars he’d loaned her. There was a space for him to sign and also a place for the document to be notarized. Dylan made a grab for the paper, and Henry held it out of the toddler’s reach.

  “That wasn’t my idea. Stephanie—she’s Tam’s new partner—wanted everything in writing.”

  “Smart woman,” Henry remarked. “We might be able to get this notarized in Devyn tomorrow if we leave early enough.”

  “You don’t have a problem signing it?” Doug asked.

  “No. Why would I? It’s a smart move on the new partner’s behalf. I might’ve gotten my money back sooner if I’d been as smart and set specific repayment terms and had it recorded somewhere other than my safe deposit box.” He dropped the paper on the table and paid Dylan a moment of attention before turning back to Mel and Doug. “All right. What’s the other thing?”

  “Well…” Doug began. “Like Mel told you, we’re back together, and we’re trying very hard to make our relationship work this time. Things are going pretty well, too. We still have some things to work out, but the important thing is that we’re trying. You were right about that, too. It wasn’t a lack of compatibility or issues we couldn’t overcome.”

  “That’s great, Doug. I’m happy for you. But what does that have to do with me?”

  “We have a proposal for you,” Mel said. She gripped Doug’s hand and glanced at him for reassurance. When he nodded, she met Henry’s gaze. “We’d like you to be Dylan’s godfather.”

  Henry wasn’t sure which emotion hit him first—the relief that he wouldn’t have to say goodbye to Dylan forever or the d
read that he would always have that tie to Mel and the pain of learning that Dylan wasn’t his son. He stared blankly at her for almost a minute before stammering, “Wh-what?”

  “I—we—know you’d take good care of him if anything were to happen to us,” Mel explained. “And… we want to have a reason for you to stay in Dylan’s life because you were one of the biggest parts of it. We don’t want either of you to lose that bond.”

  “And this has nothing to do with money?” The words popped out of his mouth, bypassing his censor, and he immediately felt like an ass for asking but didn’t apologize or attempt to take them back. He had to know.

  “I can take care of my own family,” Doug replied a little too coldly.

  “I never doubted that,” Henry bit back. “What I doubted was when or if you’d man up and decide you should.”

  “Henry,” Lindsay said gently.

  That one utterance averted what would have quickly spiraled into a firestorm of accusations, and Henry inhaled deeply, then let it out. “Sorry.”

  Mel stared at him with unveiled surprise, but she said nothing. Instead, she steered them back to her proposal. “What do you think? Will you do it?”

  Henry didn’t respond. On the one hand, saying yes meant he wouldn’t have to fight to keep his love for Dylan buried, but on the other, he was moving on with Lindsay and making plans to secure their future, and he didn’t want any tie with his past to damage that.

  “Henry?” Doug asked.

  “I can’t make a decision right now,” he answered. He scrubbed his hand over his face and took a deep breath, but it did little to relieve the heavy weight of weariness. He should just say no because, if the tension that sapped his energy was what it would bring him, he didn’t want it. “I need a couple days to think it over and talk it over with Lindsay. In the meantime, why don’t we plan to get this notarized tomorrow morning?” He lifted the letter briefly off the table.

  “I guess that’ll have to do for now,” Mel said. She stood and tried to take Dylan from Henry, but the little boy wouldn’t have it.