A Penny's Worth

by Nancy DeRosa

  Dolores huffed, “Again with the sarcasm, I can’t stand it any more.”

  Perched on a solitary stool in the middle of the kitchen, Aunt Bess, exasperated, put her hands up in the air. “Leave her alone already Dolores. Let her do what she wants. It’s her life.”

  Whirling around, Dolores snapped, “Don’t get involved, Bess, it has nothing to do with you. She’s not your daughter and you don’t know how she can be.”

  “How can I be Mom?” Penny asked in a steely voice.

  “Stubborn.”

  Penny’s father Ron finally piped in. “Penny, you’re getting to an age where maybe you shouldn’t be thinking of a career change. Before you know it, you’ll be wanting to plan a nice nest egg for your retirement.”

  Feeling her stomach clench, she took a sip of seltzer. Right Dad, never form an opinion on your own, just parrot Mom like you always do. It felt like two fists were slamming into each other in the pit of her stomach. Both of her sisters-in-law were watching her, waiting to see her reaction. This made her literally bite her tongue so she wouldn’t lose her temper. As calmly as possible she addressed her father. “I’m not planning on retiring for a long time Dad. I’m not ready to throw in the towel just yet.” She looked around at her family. “I thought you all would be happy for me. Don’t you think I’m too young to close up shop so early? Why do you have such low expectations, and why for God’s sake do you expect life to offer me nothing but frozen dinners and Fernfair elementary school?” She turned around and stalked to the front door. She slammed it and walked toward her car with tears streaming down her face.

  With a smile, she remembered Aunt Bess following her with a sausage and cheese calzone in her left hand. “Don’t let that woman get to you Penny,” she had declared. “She’s like one of those cats who sits on your chest and sucks the air out of you. Go for it, I’m proud of you.”

  As she sat in the front office reliving this awful memory, Penny knew this was not the time to be thinking about it. She already felt a compelling urge to bolt from the room. She pressed her hand down on her left knee to stop her foot from shaking. Her foot went steady until she took her hand away. The chair was creaking from the rapid little movements.

  She knew her family would never support her in any attempt to create a better life. She had already learned this from past experience, but now that she had taken a step toward changing her life, her family’s reaction made her all the more certain that they would not be supportive.

  Breaking into Penny’s dismal thoughts, the receptionist called out cheerfully, “Dr Kittles will see you now.”

  The knots in her stomach clenched even tighter. Briskly, she walked into the doctor’s office.

  She worried that her attempt at a smile would turn into an anxious frown as she eyed Dr Kittles. He was a burly fellow with a kind smile. He had a big head, a big beard, big eyebrows, and a thick lion’s mane of salt and pepper hair. She pictured Neanderthal Man, but quelled that thought as she shook his hand. His eyes held warmth, and intelligence. She immediately felt at ease.

  “Hello Ms Marins,” Dr Kittles said amiably as he took a seat behind his desk. “I understand you’re looking for a position here as a nurse?”

  She tried again with the smile. She was so nervous, she wanted to jump out of her chair and dash out of the office never to be seen or heard from again. What the hell am I doing here? she thought, as the panic welled up.

  Roaming over Penny’s resume, Dr Kittles cleared his voice. “I understand you’re a registered nurse.”

  “Yes I am.”

  “You took a position at Fernfair Elementary and have been there for quite a number of years.”

  “Yes I have.”

  “Now you would like to work at a hospital?” He looked up from her resume with a penetrating stare.

  “Yes I do.”

  “It’s been a while since you ran an IV or took blood pressure, checked vitals or gave an enema.” He smiled as he stated the last procedure. “Shall I continue with all the other requirements?”

  She knew she had to speak now or forever hold her peace. “I think my grades in nursing school will reflect on how well I mastered those procedures, Dr Kittles. You don’t forget how to do them, it’s just like riding a bike.” Without thinking, she blurted out, “You would never forget how to perform surgery even if you hadn’t done it for a while, right?”

  He put his head back and laughed. “Well I do think I would be a bit rusty, but eventually it would come back to me. And in your case things have changed since you last did your clinical training. Many of the procedures are done differently now. You would have to take refresher classes and seminars on how to perform even the most basic of clinical procedures.”

  Again without thinking, she blurted out, “Of course I would do that, I really want this job. I’m a good nurse and I want to help people. Maybe that sounds corny, but it’s true and I’m committed to being as good as I was when I came out of nursing school.” She sat back in her chair and added, “I’m aware that there’s a nurse shortage here. All you have to do is give me a chance. You’ll know in one day if I’m up to muster or not. I’ll attend all the lectures here and I would be able to specialize in any area you want me to.”

  Dr Kittles laughed again. “You’re quite ambitious aren’t you?” His expression changed and he didn’t say anything for a long moment. Eventually he looked up and smiled. “I’m giving my recommendations to the nursing department for you to work alongside Nurse Reins. If your interview goes well with her then we will be able to see what you’re made of.”

  Penny wanted to jump up and down with happiness. Luckily her social filter just stopped her in time: a little voice calmly informed her that she’s still in the interview and it can all still go wrong, even in these last few seconds. Concentrating hard, she clasped her hands together, stood up and said, “Dr Kittles you won’t be sorry thank-you so much for this opportunity.”

  Skipping toward her car, Penny was so excited that she wanted to scream out he liked me, he really, really, did.

  Penny felt something land on her left shoulder. She looked down to discover that a bird had just dropped a huge pile of bird crap on her new navy blazer. She had always heard that it was a sign of good luck to have a bird poop on you, and she felt this sign was telling her that she was worth so much more than that. She looked up at the sky with a huge smile on her face and said a soft thank-you.

  Chapter 11

  New job and new career: Check (or very nearly, anyway).

  Reach out and transform social life: Definitely next on her to-do list.

  A few days after her interview, Penny took Winston to the new doggy park that had just opened up a few blocks over. The park should be a perfect place to meet new people. Strangers with dogs always stop to chat, and surely (Penny thought) they’ll have a strong commonality right from the start.

  Stepping outdoors, she thought the day looked picture perfect. She was happy to have a destination. She was antsy sitting around the house. The day after next she was to have her second interview with nurse Reins. The anticipation of this meeting was unbearable. She knew if it did not go well she’d have no shot of working at Wayside Hospital.

  Strolling down the street, she thought of the Recital at Fernfair and the handsome doctor. It was his face that drifted into her mind when she was alone in the dark trying to fall asleep. She couldn’t help thinking of the brief encounter she had with him.

  Winston’s excited bark brought her back to reality. “Calm down Winston,” she said softly. “We’re almost there and you can play to your heart’s content.”

  Staring up, the floppy-eared Beagle seemed to have understood. But he tugged at his leash as they approached the entrance to the doggie playground. The park was jam packed with owners and their canine friends.

  She immediately spotted two Labrador retrievers, a miniature collie, a German Shepherd, two pugs, three bull dogs, and a huge assortment of mutts. As she approached the middle of th
e fenced-in area she noticed a miniature toy poodle, shaking uncontrollably, pressed up close against its owner. The lady must be insane to bring such a little dog into a park with all these big intimidating dogs.

  Penny had a strong urge to point out to the owner that she should put her dog in the smaller fenced-in area with the other smaller dogs. She examined the woman more closely. She looked tough. A small black tattoo of a snake on her left wrist warded Penny away like the colourful blotches on a poisonous toad.

  Better to leave people with snake tattoos alone, she told herself, just to be on the safe side.

  Off his leash, Winston bounded joyfully into the folds of the other dogs. His arrival set off a commotion: she could just picture their doggie conversation: “Ah, some new blood to join our play, eh Major?” They all ran around in circles vying to get a sniff of the new doggie on the block. Penny grinned: they were just like children. She loved watching dogs at play. How adorable they are, she thought fondly with a quick jolt of happiness.

  “Hey you stupid mongrel, get the hell off of my dog,” someone screamed.

  She was torn from her sentimental thoughts to find Tattoo Lady bending down to pick up her little poodle. To her growing dismay she also noticed that the woman was pointing at Winston. “Whose dog is that?” she asked sharply.

  “He’s mine,” Penny stated meekly, her heart pounding.

  “Your mutt just bit my dog,” Tattoo growled as she roughly held out her dog’s little hind leg. There was blood. Penny glanced worriedly at Winston who was happily running around in circles with one of the pugs. Winston had decided right at that moment to put his head close to its private parts.

  “I don’t think it was my dog, he has never bitten a person, or an animal ever,” Penny stated evenly. The blood was coursing in her ears. She already knew this interaction would not have an attractive outcome.

  Snake Lady laughed harshly. “Oh, so you’re like every other stupid imbecile that says, oh it’s not my dog, he never bites, oh, it wasn’t my kid, he doesn’t throw rocks.” She took a menacing step toward Penny. “I’m sick of people like you and let me tell you something lady a dog never bites someone until it does bite someone.” She shook her fist—it blurred the air like something out of a 1970s pop video—and bellowed, “It’s as simple as that.” She pointed a finger at Penny and added, “Your stupid dog took a piece out of my Cookie.”

  Hell’s bells, but Penny didn’t want to get beat up at the dog park. That would rate as the lowest moment in her life; somewhere below Sea Level, she reckoned. She took a deep breath, her subconscious supplying the mantra: I can defuse this. I can. “Did you actually see my dog bite your dog?”

  Snake Bitch scoffed; it was a disgusting sound, like a tetchy hippo blowing its nose. “I didn’t need to see it happen. It was pretty clear which mongrel was closest when she yelped out in pain.”

  The inevitable crowd had gathered. Back in school, someone would have been shouting “Fight! Fight!” But these are civilised adults: they don’t shout it out loud. They merely think it. They were obviously waiting to see who would threw the first punch.

  Penny put her hand out in a pleading gesture. “Did anyone see who bit Cookie?”

  Taking a step back, the growing crowd offered nothing. Penny was on her own.

  “Look miss, I’m so sorry that your dog was bit, but you can’t say for sure it was mine, and anyway, as I said before, my dog is not aggressive and he would not bite a little dog for no reason.”

  “Are you saying my dog asked for this?” Snake Woman screeched, holding Cookie closer to her chest.

  The blood from Cookie’s hind leg had gotten all over the woman’s coat and her rising terror was quickly replaced with a wave of compassion. The woman may be crazy but she clearly loved her little dog, and Penny could relate to that. She had to do this, regardless of the circumstances.

  She took a deep breath.

  She stepped closer to the woman and gingerly touched her jacket. “What can I do to help Cookie?” she asked. “And if it was Winston who bit your dog then I am terribly sorry. From now on, I will watch him closer when he is with other animals.”

  Penny swore she could see the tension lift up and out of the woman like a departing Anger Demon. Her body relaxed, her face softened, and her voice trembled as she said, “Cookie’s so little, just look at her, the poor thing is shaking.”

  Quickly patting Cookie on her head, Penny offered to drive the dog to the vet’s. She offered to pay for the coat to be cleaned and any vet bill. “Whatever I can do, please tell me,” Penny added.

  “Well maybe, you know,” the lady drawled—slightly confused, probably unused to being placated, “I can’t say for absolute certain it was your dog. I didn’t see it exactly happen, so I’m not going to press charges or anything, but you should keep an eye on him.”

  Penny was relieved to see the bleeding had stopped and the cut did look minor.

  With Cookie clutched tightly under her arm, Snake Lady left the park. With a great sense of relief, Penny knew the altercation was over, and she was the one responsible for nipping it in the bud.

  The fight was over, so the crowd, losing interest, drifted away. Enough of the doggie park for one afternoon, she decided… the re-energised social life can wait for another day. She leashed up Winston.

  As she walked up to the exit gate, an older man stopped her and said, “I was impressed with how you handled that, like a real lady you did. Gretchen is a live wire and that situation could have gotten out of hand in a split second. That crazy woman and her crazy dog live in my building and the both of them are always looking for a fight.”

  She smiled at the elderly man and his miniature Collie. “Well I’m glad I was able to defuse it. I wasn’t hankering for a black eye.”

  Patting Winston’s head, he smiled back. “A fine woman such as yourself would never deserve that.”

  Smiled demurely, she waved goodbye. Walking home, she felt proud. She knew she had changed another negative experience toward her favor. She looked up at a bird flying overhead and it made her smile. She couldn’t resist saying out loud, “Come on little birdie, take another crap on me. I can use all the luck I can get. I’m Penny and I’m worth so much more than that.”

  Chapter 12

  Nurse Reins sat like a grizzled old albatross behind her clean white desk. Penny was daunted; she looked tough. Reins’ eyes were too small, giving her a shrewd look. Her frizzy gray hair made her look unapproachable; and the multitude of wrinkles upon her face, which should give her face warmth and character, instead made her seem intimidating.

  Penny sat opposite her desk and fidgeted uncomfortably as Reins stared her out for a long, uncomfortable moment.

  Finally, her new mentor broke the silence. Her voice was pinched and a little hoarse. “I don’t normally work alongside anyone, and if it weren’t for Dr Kittles’ recommendation I wouldn’t be doing this.”

  Taken aback with this disclosure, Penny tried to compose herself. “Uh, well, thank-you for doing this Ms Reins. I hope it won’t be too much of an imposition for you.”

  Drumming a pencil on her desk, Nurse Reins curtly added, “It’s been a long time since you’ve performed any of the necessary procedures that are required in a hospital setting, but given that you do have RN requirements we’ll see what you remember.” She dropped the pencil with a clang, stood up, and motioned for Penny to follow. “You’ll be working on the oncology floor. We need nurses there the most right now.”

  “Of course,” Penny chirped, hoping she didn’t look panicked. Her heart had begun to pound at the thought of Nurse Reins breathing down her neck, watching her with those squinty little eyes. She knew she had no choice but to do as she was told. Penny wanted this job badly, but the fact she’d be working in oncology was something of a bombshell.

  That initial trepidation, made physical by the nervous clench in the pit of her stomach, never let up. Nurse Reins barely left her side. Throughout the long and stressful day, Pen
ny successfully took numerous blood pressures, monitored patients’ temperatures, administered medications, and checked blood counts. The last blood count she checked was for a young woman who was to have her first chemo session. Penny was about to learn how to administer the Chemotherapy. She tried to listen very carefully to Nurse Reins’ instructions.

  “Make sure you are always close at hand if your patients need you, Ms Marins,” she cautioned curtly. “Monitor very carefully when the chemo is being administered.”

  “Oh, of course.” She nodded vigorously.

  She assessed her patient to be about thirty-five. Her name was Charlotte Munsen and her chart displayed advanced breast cancer. Penny’s heart went out to this woman, who wore a stricken look upon her face as she watched Nurse Reins administer the chemo through her IV.

  Charlotte Munsen noticed Penny looking at her. She rolled her head dejectedly in Penny’s direction. “I can’t believe that I actually have cancer, let alone that I’m in a hospital getting chemotherapy. What the hell happened? Just last month my husband and I were talking about having a baby.” Tears sprang to her eyes.

  “I don’t blame you. Who in their right mind would want to be doing this? I can’t think of anyone.”

  Nurse Reins looked at Penny in surprise. Uh-oh; she realized she may have said the wrong thing.

  Charlotte Munsen burst out in laughter. “That’s the first time anyone has made an honest statement since I was diagnosed.” She snorted and continued, “The damn cancer has spread and all I hear is don’t worry, everything will be fine.” She looked over at the chemo machine and said softly, “I’ve got so much I still want to do. Everything is not fine and I don’t know what I’m going to do.”

  Walking closer to the woman’s bed, Penny replied, “You’re going to do just what you’re doing, fight with all you’ve got to get well again.” Taking the woman’s hand, Penny smiled down at her. “I don’t see a speck of defeat in those eyes and I’ve seen people face some pretty dim prospects and come out on top. I’m telling you the truth when I say I’ve got a really good feeling that you and your husband will be revisiting those baby plans. “