Tattered on My Sleeve

by Autumn Jones Lake

  Honey eyes peeking up at me.

  Fuck, I’m hard as steel now. Eight fucking miserable years later, and that memory still works every time. I snag a condom out of my left back pocket and hand it to Cookie. The fake-chemical scent of cherries reaches my nose as she rolls it down with her mouth. Christ, the tricks this bitch can do with that mouth of hers.

  Sweet motherfuck.

  Cookie takes me right to the back of her throat and stays for a second before bobbing up and down. Why Rock gave this bitch up, I have no fucking idea.

  Opening my eyes is a mistake. Trinity stares at me with wide-eyed pain all over her angel face. I stare back and cock my head in a way I want her to read as: You’re kidding, right? Teller and Murphy still have their hands and mouths all over her, and she’s, what? Hurt I’m getting some head?

  Fuck that.

  And fuck her too. I flip her off, and she finally takes her wounded kitten face elsewhere.

  Twisting my hand in Cookie’s hair, I push and pull her up and down my cock. She goes soft and lets me just fuck her face until I come. She looks up at me, and I smile.

  “Thanks, darlin’. You’re right. I do feel better now.” Lie. If anything, I feel worse, but that’s not Cookie’s fault. I give her a quick peck on the cheek, and she beams.

  She cleans me up and goes away.

  Perfect.

  Scanning the room, I don’t see the threesome.

  Oh, there they are, heading upstairs.

  Fuck-fuck-fucking bullshit!

  The front door opens, pulling my attention away from the nightmare headed upstairs. Rock, dragging in the bitch he’s been hard up for at least two goddamn years. She’s skinnier than I remember. Still has a nice rack, though. Must be drunk off her ass because she’s swaying and kind of dazed as she looks around the room.

  She smiles when Rock leans down and whispers in her ear. I guess she’s pretty. Still don’t see what all the fuss is about. Why we had to risk a war with the Vipers over her. Why my best friend is so fucking obsessed with her.

  Rock sees me and nods over the crowd. He looks like he just won the motherfucking lottery.

  Whatthefuckever.

  It’s good to see him happy. Maybe once he fucks her out of his system, he can get back to nailing club ass and tappin’ strippers like a boss.

  He pulls her over to my little pity corner, and she’s so out of it, I doubt she even notices me.

  “Everything good?” he asks, taking stock of my miserable, drunken condition.

  “Same old shit.” I point my bottle at Hope. “She okay?”

  He hugs her tight to his side. “Yeah, had a little too much to drink out with her friends.”

  She finally shakes her hair out of her face and looks at me with bleary eyes. Suddenly, her lips turn up in a big, dopey smile. “I remember you. You were there the day Rock tried to ruin my life,” she blurts out, then falls into uncontrollable giggles.

  My eyebrows shoot up at that, but I manage to contain my laughter.

  Nice work, prez. All righty then. Good luck with that.

  After we talk a few more seconds, he leads her upstairs. I’d like to go upstairs too. My head’s pounding and I’d like to go to fucking bed. But I know the three of them are up there, and if I run into them or so much as hear them, I might murder all three. And that would be bad.

  Why does prez let her get away with shit? She wants to be a whore, she should have to fuck in her own damn room. Downstairs. Away from me.

  To my knowledge, she’s never let any of the brothers in her room.

  Whipping out my cell phone, I send the guy who schedules my underground fights a text. Get me something soon.

  After what seems like forever, I get a response. Thursday. Address TBA.

  Sweet, I’ll unleash some of this rage in a nice and nasty underground fight. Hopefully, I can hang on until then.

  It’s hard to think with Murphy pressed against my back and Teller in front of me, nipping at my neck. We stumble into one of the free rooms—neutral ground—and Teller goes straight for my shirt, whipping it over my head and palming my breasts. Murphy slides his hands down the front of my pants, cupping my mound while he grinds his cock against my ass.

  I can’t get Wrath’s furious face out of my head.

  Fucking mad at me, when he had Cookie bobbing up and down on his dick in front of everyone.

  Jerk.

  My pants get kicked to the side after Murphy works them down my legs. After I get Teller out of his clothes, I fall back against him. He wraps his arms around me, sliding his hands into my panties to tease my clit. My hips jerk against him, so he retreats. Murphy kisses me, tangling his fingers in my hair while I work his clothes off. My eyes flicker open. We left the door open. Not the first time.

  Murphy works my panties off. I should be embarrassed about how turned on I am, but they love it, so I’m not. He presses in, moving those fingers slowly over my sensitized flesh.

  At my back, Teller steps away. The rough and familiar drag of the nightstand drawer opening excites me even more. He tosses some condoms on the bed and stretches out over the comforter, watching Murphy work me over. Murphy has me pinned tight to him but angles our bodies so Teller can see exactly what his friend’s doing to me.

  “Fuck.”

  “Yeah.” His husky voice vibrates against my jaw, sending heat through me. He grins while pressing kisses over my face and down my neck.

  Teller reaches out his hands to me, pulling me on top of him. With one hand behind my head, he pulls me to him for a kiss. A deep, hard, demanding kiss. His other arm bands around me, pinning me tight to him. I’m hyperaware of his cock nestled against me.

  “Stop teasing me, Trinity.” He groans with a smile.

  Taking my hands, he pushes me up and helps me sink all the way down his shaft.

  “Fuuuck, that’s good, girl.”

  Ever patient, Murphy waits, fisting his cock as he watches us. This might be easier on my knees with one behind and one in front, but they know I don’t do that. Over the years, they’ve never complained or made me feel bad about it.

  Releasing one of Teller’s hands, I pull Murphy to me and eagerly lick the head of his cock. I circle him with my tongue, suck, and pull him in my mouth. Teller’s hands cup my hips as he starts rocking me up and down. Eventually, we find the right rhythm.

  Briefly, my eyes flutter open, and I notice a woman standing just outside the doorway, watching us. That’s nothing new. Rock tugs her away, yells at us and slams the door shut.

  I wake a few hours later, cuddled in Teller’s arms. He’s sound asleep. Murphy’s long gone. He never stays. I’m an expert at extracting myself from Teller’s embrace by now. Wrath’s the only man I’ve ever happily slept beside for an entire night. I tug on my clothes and press a quick kiss to Teller’s cheek. Closing the door quietly behind me, a low voice breaks the silence.

  “Have fun?”

  Fuck.

  I turn and find a furious-faced Wrath leaning against the wall opposite the room I just left and want to die. With arms crossed over his chest and anger pinching his face, he looks tired. I want to reach out and touch him, or offer anything besides this angry glaring thing we’re doing.

  The soft moment sours, and I square my shoulders. “Yes. Did you?”

  His jaw clenches and he shakes his head. “No. Not at all.” He pushes off the wall and storms down the hall, slamming his door shut without another word.

  Whatever. I’m not going to cry. He can’t make me cry anymore.

  He had his chance. Why does he keep punishing me?

  When I get downstairs, I tiptoe over a few sleeping bodies and make my way to my room. Locking the door behind me, I grab a quick shower and then crawl into my own bed.

  Alone.

  As usual, my eyes pop open much earlier than I’d like. Knowing I’ll never get back to sleep, I dress quickly. The dining room’s empty, but any minute one or two of the guys will be in there. I should at least get coffee s
tarted.

  Teller’s in the dining room first. He pulls me into his lap and gives me a quick kiss on the cheek. “Where’d you disappear to?”

  I ruffle his hair with my fingers. “My room.”

  “Hmmm.”

  “What do you want for breakfast?”

  “Would you be mad if I said you?”

  I laugh his words off and kiss his cheek. “Tell me or it’s eggs and bacon for you.”

  He sighs and gives me a gentle shove off his lap. “That’s fine.”

  Hoot, one of the prospects, is already in the kitchen, gathering supplies for me. He has the griddle going and plates lined up.

  “Thanks, kid.”

  He grunts at me. I don’t think he likes being called kid. Whoops.

  I hear more people out in the dining room and stick my head out to see Bricks. He’s almost never up here, so I wave to him. He waves back and sits with Teller. Ducking back into the kitchen, I grab two mugs and the now-full coffee pot and head out.

  And stop dead in my tracks.

  Wrath’s sitting next to Teller.

  Squaring my shoulders, I’m determined not to let him intimidate me. I set a mug in front of Bricks and Teller and pour their coffee.

  I can feel Wrath’s eyes drilling holes in me, but I don’t turn to him until I’m finished.

  “Do you want coffee? Breakfast?”

  For a second, he looks like he’s going to say something nasty, but he just nods. I set the coffee on the table, run to get a couple more mugs, and return.

  “Breakfast should be done in a few minutes.”

  I’m hoping some of the other girls wake up soon so they can take over kitchen duty. As much as I’d like to knock Cookie out after last night, she’s usually a big help in the mornings. I need to get the hell out of here for a few merciful hours.

  Stash calls Hoot downstairs to help him with something, so I get stuck bringing out the tray of food for everyone. I concentrate really hard on not dropping everything all over the place. There’s a reason I used to tend bar and not waitress. I see Rock and toss him one of my standard silly greetings and set down everyone’s plates.

  My breath catches and my cheeks sizzle with heat when I notice the woman sitting next to him. The same woman who stopped to watch us last night. You’ve got to be kidding. Of course she’s with prez. The tray rattles and almost falls out of my hands. What a horrible first impression.

  Wrath chooses that moment to embarrass me by pulling me into his lap. I introduce myself to Hope. She doesn’t seem to remember me, but I’m still freaked-out-mortified. I shouldn’t care. Nothing she saw was outside the realm of normal around here. But she’s new, and I get the feeling by her squeaky-clean demeanor, she’s not familiar with MCs at all. She offers to come help me, which really sets my nerves jittering. No way is the president’s girlfriend setting foot in the kitchen. She’s nice and asks for something simple. Either she doesn’t remember last night or she’s too classy to mention it. Both suit me fine.

  Just before I open the kitchen door, Wrath’s big voice reaches me. "You know how she got the name Trinity, right? All three holes—"

  "Wrath! The fuck?" Rock snaps.

  The slight good mood I’d worked myself into is ruined after hearing that from Wrath. Dickhead.

  I’m sure he didn’t think I’d overhear it, and somehow that makes it even worse.

  The last person I want to see this morning is of course in the dining room. Teller. My fists itch to knock him the fuck out. At least Bricks is here as a buffer so I don’t kill the little fuck.

  Make that the second-to-last person I want to see.

  Trinity flutters out of the kitchen with coffee and a smile for everyone. Glad she’s looking so chipper and satisfied this morning.

  Even more fantastic, Rock’s girl is still here. She’s sober this morning and looks freshly fucked, only adding to my bad mood. Prez fawns all over her so much we all have to pick our jaws up off the table.

  I’m barely paying attention to what’s being said. Hope’s fucking clueless and annoying. Touching Bricks like that with her man sitting right there. The fuck?

  Trinity steers clear of me when she returns and sets a giant box of cereal and a gallon of milk on the table. It strikes me funny since Rock’s bitch is so fuckin’ skinny she probably couldn’t eat that much in a month.

  "Jesus Christ, Trin, how much ya think she’s gonna eat?" Because I’m so fucked up, my lame attempt at a joke just sounds mean. Rock eyes me like he’s deciding which boot he wants to shove up my ass.

  “It’s fine. Thank you, Trinity. I’m starving,” she says with a friendly smile, ignoring the rest of us.

  I have to give Hope credit. She’s a classy girl and not the stuck-up bitch I expected her to be.

  Ain’t I one big fucking contradiction? Here I am giving Trinity a hard time, yet I’m happy Rock’s girl is so nice to her.

  Anticipating Trinity’s next visit to our table divides my attention. Hope’s still yapping to Bricks. He wants to hire her to handle his ex-wife’s latest family court drama. Don’t see why not.

  “It’s safe now. Vipers are in the fucking gr—” I start to tell her.

  Rock’s fist slams into the table, rattling everything on the surface and startling Hope. “Are you fucking high?”

  Whoa. I assumed he’d explained some of this shit to her by now. Guess not. I’m just jamming my feet in my mouth all over this morning.

  And I know just who to blame for that.

  Trinity.

  She’s got me so fucking messed up after last night and then running into her earlier.

  When Hope runs upstairs, I think it’s the perfect time to get out of here before I say something else I shouldn’t.

  “Stop right there, asshole,” Rock growls at me.

  Asshole, yup. That’s me this morning.

  “What the ever-loving fuck is wrong with you?” Rock asks.

  “Prez, I thought she knew at least a little bit.” Even to my own ears, I sound like a whiny cunt.

  He continues his rant. “Well, she doesn’t. All this shit is new to her, and if it’s all right with you, I’d like to break her in slowly, got it?”

  I smirk because he’s going to have his work cut out for him breaking his little Cinderella into MC life. She’s clueless as fuck. But I keep my opinion to myself because I’m not in the mood to take a punch to the throat right now.

  “Yeah, sure,” I answer.

  “And treat Trinity with some respect, would ya?”

  My chest tightens at that. I’ve been a real asshole this morning. The fact that Rock even has to say that to me outlines how awful I’ve acted.

  Next to me, Teller snorts with laughter.

  Rock pins him with a hard stare. Good, at least the pressure is finally off me. “What’s so funny?”

  “Everyone’s had a piece of Trinny,” Teller says.

  What. A. Dick.

  Considering he and Murphy just worked her over less than eight hours ago, that’s a pretty dickish thing to say. It surprises me coming from Teller. He’s not usually such an asshat.

  Rock’s not amused. As much as the motherfucker gets around—or got around—you’ll never hear him talk shit about a chick he’s nailed. “So fucking what? She tossed your homely ass a pity fuck. Be grateful, not a dick about it.” He all but snarls at Teller.

  Teller snaps his yap shut. That’s the way shit works ‘round here.

  “Rock’s right. She’s a nice girl, and she does a lot for the club,” Bricks adds.

  Oh, shut the fuck up. “Ass-kisser,” I grumble.

  Rock’s clearly done with us and stressed from having Hope out of his sight for five fucking seconds. He gives us all a behave-or-I’ll-kill-you stare and takes off.

  I’m out next, except I’m not sure where to go. I don’t want to run into Rock and Hope in the common room, and I don’t want to run into Trinity in the kitchen. But I can’t stay here either. I’m a goddamned trapped animal.

/>   Trinity, ironically enough, makes the decision for me as she slowly approaches our table. “You guys need anything?”

  Teller flicks his gaze up and smiles. “Just you, babe.”

  Fucking asshole.

  To my utter shock and delight, she shuts him down, moving away to sit next to Bricks.

  “Haven’t seen you in forever. How’s Winter?”

  Bricks is one of those faithful types. Won’t lay a finger on Trinity. I still need to get away from all of them.

  Sparky’s in the living room, having a shit fit because Rock hasn’t been downstairs to discuss tonight’s drop yet.

  “Brother, we’ve got hours. Chill the fuck out.”

  Sparky huffs and flails his way to the basement door.

  Rock has been gone a while now. I take a look around outside. His bike’s still here. Hope’s keys are in my pocket and her car is parked on the side of the building. They’ve got to be here somewhere.

  The sound of crunching leaves alerts me that someone’s coming in from the woods. Rock strolling back with his girl. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out what they were up to out in the woods. Her hair’s wild and pine needles are sprinkled all over her sweatshirt. I smother a laugh. Surprised the poor bitch can even walk. Prez has a year’s worth of fucking to take out on her ass.

  Because I’ve been properly scolded by my president for my shitty behavior this morning, I’m determined not to make any smart remarks that make Hope uncomfortable.

  Yeah, we’ll see how that goes. There’s a first time for everything.

  “Hey, guys.”

  Hope’s reddened lips curve into a smile. She really is a nice woman. It’s hard not to smile back. I hand her the keys to her car, and Rock glares at me. Goddamn, can’t do a fuckin’ thing right today.

  Careful not to reveal more than I’m supposed to, I remind him, “Prez, we got that thing this afternoon.” I catch his warning look and keep my yap shut.

  He turns Hope away and they murmur to each other. I kick a few stray pebbles while I wait. Glancing up, I catch the lick of pink flaming across her cheeks.

  She finally leaves, and I can tell Rock’s pissed about it.

  "Tell me again why I put up with these Green Street dickwads?" he asks.