Spider Bite: A Vampire Thriller (The Spider Trilogy Book 3)

by J. R. Rain

  At one point I bobbed to the surface and saw a group of soldiers camped along the shore and gathered around what looked to be a campfire. I recognized a couple of them—dead guys I’d fed on in the Civil War. The fire smelled of sulfur, so I kind of figured what was going on. They say “War is hell” and I guess it never ends.

  Lights came into view—electric lights—and the shapes and smells of some sort of civilization emerged. It was like a waterfront city, grimy but apparently inhabited, unlike the opposite bleak shore. Standing on a dock were several well-known politicians, and moored to a post was a yacht. My old pal Hemingway was sitting on deck, and he raised a toast in my direction, although nobody else seemed to notice me.

  Crowds milled around on the balconies of high-rise condominiums. Everybody seemed to be having a good time, and I wondered if maybe Hell had gotten an undeserved bad rap. If all these people had sold their souls or sinned their way into eternal punishment, it didn’t seem to be bothering them too much.

  But the next time I bobbed up and shook the water from my ears, I heard it—a girlish, keening shriek over a shallow technopop rhythm. Don’t ask me how I knew this, because it would be a long and embarrassing tale involving a concert feeding frenzy, but I recognized the “vocal artist”: Justin Bieber.

  A fitting soundtrack for the eternally damned, piped in from unseen speakers so that none might escape its annoying jagged-glass-in-bubblegum stylings.

  I became more determined than ever to rescue Parker/Maria from this place. No one deserved such torture, especially when they’d been taken by trick instead of earned through a lifetime of sin.

  I sank and jogged along the rocky bottom until I hit a concrete wall, then I climbed up until I was standing in this weird little city. It was almost like a bizarro version of Key West, with plenty of colorful characters streaming along the sidewalks dressed in period clothes from all ages—togas, tunics, saris, suits, and skirts. There were no cars here, apparently, but plenty of mopeds and motorized wheelchairs and a smattering of skater punks.

  The stores and shops looked at first glance like those you’d find in a touristy party town. But on closer examination, they were all closed, with a crazy assortment of tantalizing goods in the windows all beyond the purchasing power of the passing consumers. Lottery tickets, liquor, sex toys, cigarettes, candy bars, fireworks—all those temptations were apparently off limits. I was beginning to think the devil was even crueler than I’d imagined.

  I had no idea where Parker/Maria might be, but I had a tingling sense that she was here somewhere. In fact, I heard her: So, what took you so long?

  Our psychic link was back. This was a good thing.

  I can tell how much you missed me, she thought.

  Good grief, I didn’t want her reading my mind where Maria might overhear. This psychic link was embarrassing enough without Maria knowing about our intimate, personal lives. And about me being a merciless bloodsucker, although I did try to stick to victims who deserved it. I probably shouldn’t worry so much about what a dead person thinks of me, but I seem to run into more dead folks than living folks these days.

  I asked Parker where she was, and she said: I can’t hear you, I’ve got a Bieber in my ear.

  I’d successfully blocked out the squeaky pop noise, but Parker channeled it straight into my skull, where it would probably remain a stain for another ten centuries. But right now I just wanted to find Parker and then figure out how to get the hell out of Hell.

  I merged into the crowd, where no one paid much attention to a dripping-wet vampire in a leather jacket, and just focused on Parker. She led me like a lighthouse beacon toward a tall building that looked like a casino, with an oversized pool out front, big flashing dice hanging from neon arches, and plastic palm trees lining the street.

  I slipped inside, expecting a crowd, but the place was deader than Elvis. Blackjack tables, roulette wheels, and slot machines sat there silent and covered in dust. The place smelled like a cigar butt, or maybe just a butt. No Parker. But there was an elevator whose doors opened, and the button for the top floor was lit up.

  I can take a hint.

  I stepped aboard and as soon as I rode up thirteen floors, the elevator dinged and there she was.

  Only, she wasn’t alone. And I don’t mean she was with Maria, either.

  Lucifer stood there with his jackpot grin. “Welcome to my world, Spider.”

  The entire floor was one big penthouse apartment, all the walls consisting of glass. The place had all the nicest things, stolen from mankind over the centuries: King Louis furniture, lost paintings of Da Vinci and Renoir, golden relics from Egyptian kings. I had to hand it to him, the guy sure knew how to live.

  Parker stood beside him like she belonged there. I couldn’t sense Maria anywhere, which was a little weird, but I had bigger worries at the moment.

  Lucifer had home-court advantage, he had my girl, and he had a serious ego going for him, as well as thousands of years of experience.

  All I had was...

  Well, all I had was that I was Spider. Hell, I’d take those odds any day.

  Chapter Twenty-three

  I considered my options and realized I didn’t have many. The next best thing to options is information.

  “Parker’s not dead,” I said. I could see that clear as day. The others I had seen along the River Styx were clearly passed on. Most I could see through, and many sported their actual wounds. Hell, one of the soldiers had been missing half his head. “So this can’t be Hell.”

  “Perhaps,” said Lucifer. “Perhaps not.”

  “Don’t let him fool you, Spidey,” said Parker. “We’re in a sort of weigh station.”

  “Weigh station?” I said. “Don’t you mean ‘waystation’? And did you say Spidey?”

  She shrugged. “It felt like a Spidey moment.”

  I guess it was inevitable that the nicknames would start up. I was already ruing the day she’d start calling me “Webhead.”

  I like that, she thought.

  Shit, I thought.

  Parker grinned as more words appeared in my head: Oh, and Maria wants you to watch your language.

  Oh, brother.

  Meanwhile, the devil was watching us curiously. “Ah, I see you two can communicate telepathically. How charming. It must be real love.”

  “Something you wouldn’t know about, I’m sure,” I said. “And what’s a weigh station?”

  He grinned. “Better to show you.”

  He raised his hand and the wall of windows behind him flickered briefly, then disappeared altogether. The opening revealed a dark room that just might have been a tunnel. I could hear gurgling and splashing, too. Indeed, in the background I could now make out the flowing black water...and the image of a dark figure poling a flat barge. That would be, of course, Charon. The demigod who transported souls from the land of the living to the land of the dead.

  Now I watched as a small group of entities—I knew they were entities because I could see through them as well. And, like the soldiers I’d seen on my way into the Weigh Station, many had suffered fatal accidents.

  But unlike those I had seen coming in, these spirits were hesitant, nervous, perhaps.

  “Watch,” said the devil.

  I did, looking past the Prince of Darkness’ rather wide shoulders. One of the entities stepped into the center of what appeared to be the world’s biggest scales. As he did so, the structure—which was made of stone—rumbled slightly...and then began moving. The platform the entity was standing on rose slowly, higher and higher...as it did so, the entity faded from view.

  “Damn,” said Lucifer, commenting on the events I was watching. “I tried like hell to get that one.”

  I think, perhaps, my mouth might have dropped open. That’s when the next entity stepped forward. The scale shimmered and shifted, and then did not move at all.

  “Purgatory,” I said.

  “Very good, Spider,” said the devil. “Now, let’s watch this next one.
I’ve had my eye on her for quite some time.”

  Indeed, a cute woman in her early twenties stepped forward. I noted that her throat had been slit and there was a bullet wound over her chest. Yeah, someone had killed her dead.

  The scale shifted and began moving. Down. The girl looked around wildly and tried to jump off, and just as she did, she disappeared, screaming.

  Satan smiled broadly at that. “Really, was there any doubt? She was one of my favorites. I loved her work.”

  He waved his hand and the wall appeared again, and I couldn’t help but shiver.

  “Now,” said the devil—he was, I noted, still shivering with pleasure at his latest prized soul—“Where were we?”

  “We were leaving,” I said. “And since we aren’t in Hell, then you can go fuck yourself.”

  And with that, I reached over and took Parker’s hand and yanked her free from the Devil, who let her go willingly enough. The room was just a room again. I pulled Parker back toward the elevator and once inside, I pressed “L” for lobby. Just as the doors closed, I caught the devil grinning at me.

  * * *

  “He’s not going to let us escape that easily,” said Parker as the elevator continued down.

  “Why? What dog does he have in this fight?”

  “You showed him up,” said Parker. “He has to save face. Plus, I don’t think he likes you.”

  “Well, he can go—”

  “Yes, we know what he can go do,” said Parker. “And Maria doesn’t approve.”

  “I could give a sh—”

  “Spider,” Parker warned. “Anyway, remember, this is a Weigh Station, not Hell. Lucifer is not all-powerful here.”

  “Good to know. Either way, we’ve got to get out of here,” I said, as the elevator moved with agonizing slowness. In fact, was it getting slower and slower?

  “Speaking of which, how did you get in here?”

  “I have mad skills.” I pushed the elevator button again, harder this time.

  “What sort of mad skills?” Then she caught it in my thoughts. “Teleportation, huh? And since when could you do that? And why aren’t you teleporting us out of here now?”

  “I can only teleport myself, and when I do, I’m depleted.”

  “Are you depleted now?”

  “More than you know.”

  She looked at me, raised her arm, and peeled back the sleeve of her blouse. “Then hurry, dammit.”

  Like any good vampire, I didn’t need to be told twice. My fangs sprang out even as I lowered my face. I sensed Maria’s displeasure, and I couldn’t give a damn. And when I finally raised my head, dripping blood, the elevator came to a stop. The doors opened.

  “Ah, hell,” I said.

  Chapter Twenty-four

  We were back in Key West. The real Key West.

  The lobby was the one in the hotel where Parker and I were staying. And sitting there on a sofa beneath a plastic palm tree, leafing through rumpled magazines, were Dylan and the Count.

  “Where’s Maria?” Dylan said, jumping to his feet.

  “Right here,” said Parker, but she was speaking in Parker’s voice.

  “Maria?” said the Count, peering into Parker’s eyes as if searching for a diamond ring dropped down a sewer pipe.

  Parker frowned and touched her cheeks with both hands, then felt along her skull. “Hmm. This is weird.”

  I had a bad feeling about this. I rolled my eyes back to the elevator we’d just exited. The car was going up. I watched the floors tick off until it stopped at Number Thirteen.

  “Don’t tell me,” I said to Parker.

  I don’t have to. Just read my mind and get it over with.

  I did, and there was no Maria anywhere. I wasn’t sure if she’d been grossed out by my feeding or if the Devil had somehow plucked her out of Parker’s head as we descended. One thing I was pretty sure of—out of the entire group of us, Maria was probably the one who least deserved to spend eternity in Hell. But nobody ever said life was fair. Except maybe the Devil, and he’s a liar liar pants on fire.

  “What did you do with her?” Dylan said.

  The Count clenched his fists as if he wanted to put another beatdown on me. That would have been a bad idea, considering I’d just fed and was feeling my bloody oats. And I didn’t want to waste it on anyone but the Devil.

  “What if we just let her stay there?” I said, knowing it was hopeless.

  “No way,” Dylan said, rushing for the elevator. The Count raced him, and they shoved one another like two kids battling over the last seat on a carnival ride.

  Spider, Parker thought.

  I sighed. Okay.

  By the time I got there, the elevator doors had opened, and there was the massive scale. The Devil had played quite a trick. We could return, all right, but we’d have to risk our immortal souls. I felt pretty good about my own odds, but I didn’t want the souls of these amateurs on my conscience.

  Then I had an idea.

  “Look,” I said. “I don’t have a soul. Parker is pretty pure in general, besides having been possessed by a demon that one time. Dylan, you seem like a good guy, even if you’re not too bright. And, you, Count, what big sin have you ever committed besides keeping the corpse of a dead woman as your love slave? I mean, can that really even count as a sin? It’s not like anybody really got hurt.”

  The group looked at one another, more confused than wounded by my words. “So we’re not prefect, but we’re not all that bad,” Parker said.

  “Right,” I said. “So I say we stick together and tip the scales in our favor.”

  “You mean...” the Count began.

  “Yes. We all step on at once. Let our good balance out the bad, and we’ll be right there in Purgatory where we can kick the Devil’s ass and grab Maria once and for all.”

  “I like it,” Parker said.

  “Come on, no time to waste,” Dylan said, grabbing The Count’s arm and dragging him onto the scale. Parker and I jumped on right after them, and all four of us stood looking at each other, waiting for the elevator to close or the scales to swing up or down.

  Nothing happened for several seconds. Then the back wall of the elevator car dissolved and there was the Devil, much as we had left him a short time ago. Only now Maria was by his side, looking fit and young and glowing with health, the way she’d been before her fatal illness. The Count gasped audibly and Dylan involuntarily licked his lips. Even I was getting an eyeful, until Parker mentally nudged me in the ribs. She was pretty damned cute. No wonder guys were willing to fight to the death over her.

  “So, you’re back,” the Devil said. “Just like old times.”

  “Your idea of Purgatory is the only thing that’s old,” I said. “Repeating this dance over and over again.”

  He shrugged and smiled sadly. “I have plenty of spare time.”

  “Let Maria go and we’ll call it even,” I said.

  “Look, I just brought her back to life and restored her to her prime,” Lucifer said. “I made an investment here. This is my Big Casino. I can’t just go around breaking even. I have to gain. I have to win.”

  If he wins, you lose, Parker said. You knew it would come to this. You’re a threat to him. Because you don’t have a soul, you don’t have to worry about what he thinks of you. And that scares him.

  I was kind of relieved she was back to being Parker rather than Parker/Maria. Because I could cuss again in peace. I’m going to ram his pointy pitchfork so far up his ass he’ll be singing like a Bieber.

  But you can’t do it with innocent bystanders around, she thought. He’ll use them against you.

  Smart woman. I didn’t let her hear that thought, though. She was hard enough to handle as it was.

  “Okay, Lucifer,” I said. “I know what you really want. And I say let’s up the ante here.”

  Lucifer smiled. “I didn’t know you were a gambling man.”

  “Play it my way. You know the bruja who put the love spell on Dylan?”

&n
bsp; “Ah, yes. We’ve wined and dined many times...so many lost little children, so little time.”

  “Have her release Dylan from the spell.”

  “No!” Dylan shouted. “I love Maria. I don’t want to not love—”

  “Done,” Lucifer said.

  Dylan blinked. “Where are we? Who are you people?” He ran his eyes over Maria’s lithe figure, the way any red-blooded heterosexual male would, but there was no real spark there beyond the usual frat-boy lust.

  “Parker, what’s happening?” Dylan asked.

  She pointed. “Take the elevator and wait in the bar, Dylan. Have a flirtini or two while you’re there. We’ll be along soon.”

  Dylan nodded, eyes bright at the thought of alcohol waiting. “No prob.” He looked at me. “Is this your boyfriend?”

  “It’s complicated,” she said. “I’ll explain later.”

  After Dylan left, the Count got excited, as if he finally had Maria all to himself. He tried to take her hand but she backed away from him. I was contemplating how to trick the Devil into taking The Count out of the picture when the Devil turned the tables.

  “My turn,” the Devil said. “I gave up Dylan, now you give up Parker.”

  “Shit,” Parker said.

  “Please don’t curse,” Maria said. I have to admit, I liked her better when she didn’t talk.

  I wasn’t all that eager to lose Parker, because she was a clever ally and we worked well together. But I had a feeling the Devil really would hurt her somehow, and then I’d get all vulnerable and do something stupid, and that would be that. Despite being a gambler, I wasn’t willing to take that chance.

  “Okay,” I said. “No Parker. But you don’t get her soul. She gets to leave.”

  You’ll live to regret this, she said, heading for the elevator.

  If I’m lucky. But I’m not really alive anyway, you know.