Confrontation

by Sarah Holland

  'No, Bellamy,' Mark said flatly, striding past him. 'And if there are any calls for me, I'm not here. Is that clear?'

  'Yes, sir.' Bellamy watched curiously as Mark strode to the staircase, his hand around Caroline's wrist, dragging her after him up the sweeping staircase. 'Very good, sir.'

  They were on the long wood-panelled landing suddenly, and Caroline said with hoarse fury, 'You're taking me straight to the bedrooms, are you? I might have known it! You've made it clear all along that --'

  'I want to speak to you privately,' he said tightly, and pushed open a bedroom door, thrusting her inside forcefully. 'What's more private than a bedroom?'

  Caroline backed from him, her heart hammering violently, the double four-poster bed rising behind her and making her panic. 'No one would disturb us if we were downstairs! You just want --'

  'To ask you a few questions,' he said thickly, and locked the door.

  She stared through her lashes, her legs weak beneath her, so weak that she thought she might fall.

  Mark watched her across the room. 'Why did you break off your engagement to Stephen Daly?'

  She swallowed. 'That's none of your --'

  'Don't say it,' he said huskily, and walked slowly towards her, standing in front of her, looking down at her face with intense grey eyes. 'Don't tell me it's none of my business, Caro,' he said deeply. 'In fact—don't ever say that to me again. Ever.'

  'Why?' she asked hoarsely, green eyes bitter. 'Because you've forced us both into a marriage we don't want?'

  His face tightened. 'I thought you wanted marriage above and beyond anything else on earth?'

  She flushed hotly, lowering her lashes. 'I did.'

  'So what happened to change your mind?'

  She couldn't possibly answer that.

  He slid a hand under her chin, forced it upwards, the grey eyes narrowed. 'What happened in that cottage, Caroline?' he asked under his breath. 'And don't say I know what happened, because I don't. I was there, but I can't read your mind...' his lashes flickered '...or your heart.'

  Caroline tried to get away, panic erupting in her.

  'No!' he said thickly, holding on to her. 'You don't get away. That's why I brought you up here. Trapping you behind a locked door is the only way to make you speak to me.'

  'Don't, Mark!' she whispered, her shaking hands moving for support to his broad shoulders. 'I don't want to talk about it.'

  'Why did you change your mind about marriage?' Mark asked, remorseless as always. 'Why? You wanted nothing but marriage. Now, it's the last word in unreasonable behaviour.'

  'Marriage to you!' she said fiercely. 'That's all I object to!'

  'Your memory is failing,' he said thickly. 'You just broke your previous engagement—after a weekend snowbound with me. Don't tell me there's no connection, because I don't believe it.'

  Colour flooded her face. Suddenly, she couldn't stand it any longer, and her heart thudded fit to burst as she stared bitterly into his face and shook with the force of her emotions.

  'I don't want to talk about it!' she shouted hoarsely. 'Can't you get that through your thick head?'

  He looked at her in rigid, violent silence, his face dark red.

  Caroline gave a hoarse sob, and broke away from him.

  He caught her wrist and said thickly, 'Caroline, I'm in love with you.'

  Her heart stopped beating. The silence was acute. She had to struggle to breathe. Slowly, she looked round at him, but his face was averted, his hand like iron on her wrist as he looked away from her.

  Trembling, she said hoarsely, 'What did you say?'

  His eyes closed and his mouth tightened. 'I said I'm in love with you. I fell in love with you. You've changed my life. I want to marry you.' He gave a harsh laugh, looking at her, his grey eyes filled with bitter, savage emotion. 'How many different ways do you want it? It still amounts to the same thing!'

  She hesitated, her heart pounding fit to burst, then gave a hoarse cry of love and flew at him, her arms around his neck as she whispered, 'Mark... I fell in love with you, too!'

  'Do you mean it?' he whispered thickly, his arms going around her and holding her tightly.

  She was raining kisses on his face and throat. 'Yes, yes, my darling! I couldn't bear it when you just walked out like that without saying goodbye. It was like .having a limb amputated. I wanted to die...'

  'You went into Daly's arms and burst into tears,' he said deeply, burying his face in her throat. 'I felt crucified. I wanted to smash him in the face, drag you away shouting, "She's mine, get your bloody hands off her!"'

  'I had to let him down gently,' she whispered fiercely. 'He'd driven all that way, gone to so much trouble.. .how could I just tell him point-blank that I wasn't going to marry him?'

  'When did you know?' he asked, raising his dark head to look down at her with those fierce eyes. 'When did you know you were in love with me?'

  'When they broke into our world,' she whispered, stroking his dark hair. 'It was such an intrusion, so shattering to our personal world.. .1 wanted to slam the door and stay in that cottage with you forever.'

  His hard mouth curved in a smile. 'Yes... I felt that. It was the same moment for me. I had no idea what was happening until then. But all the time, all weekend, I was being forced to see you as another person, not just a woman I wanted to make love to, but more than that— a woman with feelings and a history and thoughts and dreams and ambitions: you were so real to me, and the more time I spent with you, the more I could feel it happening ... discovery... falling in love...'

  'You didn't show it,' she whispered, staring. 'I was convinced you hated me more and more as the weekend went on.'

  'I was shaken by it all,' he said deeply, stroking her face with tender fingers. 'It was such an unstoppable process. I resented it, fought it, struggled against it. Then suddenly they broke into our world and I no longer had any choice; it was over. We were both going back to London, to the office, to a relationship that was so impersonal I wanted to shout and smash things at the thought of it.' He kissed her face. 'My darling, I couldn't bear it. I liked waking up beside you. I liked watching you cook for me, I liked looking after you when your ankle went, I liked talking to you at the drop of a hat...'

  She smiled tremulously. 'Yes... I liked it, too. I even liked your bad temper and your endless attempts to seduce me.'

  He laughed, drawling, 'I'm pleased to hear it! I can't believe you could be in love with me if you didn't like my touch.'

  Her eyes fell to his mouth. 'Oh, I like your touch,' she whispered, her heart beating much too fast. 'I like it... very, very much.'

  His breath caught sharply, and his eyes darkened. 'Don't tempt me, Caroline,' he said in an unsteady voice. 'I'll want to make love to you, and I mustn't do that. Not if you're to love me as I need you to.'

  She frowned, disappointed so deeply it was impossible to speak.

  'Darling,' Mark said huskily, 'I want this to be a real marriage. I want to be able to wake up beside you for the rest of my life. I want you to cook for me, talk to me, argue with me, throw things at me, slap my face when I go too far and slam doors at the end of a row. His grey eyes held teasing laughter. 'If you believe I only married you to get you to bed—how will you be able to love me that much?'

  'You... you mean you don't want to make love to me any more?' she said in hoarse agony, staring into his grey eyes, the prospect of it appalling to her. 'Mark...for God's sake, don't say that! I want to love all of you. I keep thinking about it, and I understand it now, I can see that making love is just that. It's the closest I can get to your soul. To give you physical pleasure will make my head spin. It's not just that I want you to make love to me.' Her heart thudded wildly. 'Mark...I want to make love to you.'

  He stared down at her, his hands tightening on her waist, and said nothing, but she heard and felt his heart begin to beat thuddingly against his chest, and her eyes slowly moved to it, encountering the strong column of his tanned throat, and suddenly desire fl
ashed through her like fire.

  Breathing unsteadily, she lifted trembling hands to his throat and began to loosen his tie.

  Mark was rigid, breathing thickly, staring as she slid that silk tie off with a swish and let it fall to the floor, her eyes darting back to his as she shakingly began to unbutton his shirt, exposing his hard-muscled chest, the black hairs that curled there, the heartbeat that thudded so hard beneath skin and bone.

  Dry-mouthed, she bent her head, her mouth moving seductively over his chest.

  'Oh, God...!' Mark bit out thickly, and suddenly he was pulling her face up to his, his mouth crushing hers, and they kissed like one person, desperate to get so close to the other that their souls merged along with their bodies.

  He lifted her in his arms, carrying her to the bed.

  'Are you sure about this?' he whispered hoarsely as he lay down beside her, breathing harshly. 'My darling, I'm prepared to wait. It's not vital to me to make love to you now. I want you like hell, but I want your love far more.'

  'Take both,' she whispered, her fingers stroking his bare chest, and then she started to push his shirt and jacket back off his broad, muscled shoulders.

  He shouldered out of them, his face dark red with desire, and threw them to the floor. He came back to her, and his mouth covered hers with a deep, demanding kiss that shook her to her roots. She moaned, running her hands over his chest and spine and shoulders and stomach, revelling in his harsh gasps of pleasure. His hands unzipped her dress, tugged it down to the waist, covered her breasts, unleashed them from the lacy bra, stroking them as she gave long shaking moans of pleasure as his fingers stimulated her erect nipples.

  'Love me...' she said thickly, clutching his dark head as they kissed. 'Love...'

  Mark's heart slammed violently and he tugged her dress off completely, sliding between her slender thighs, his hair-roughened chest clamping against her as his hands unhooked the lacy bra she wore, and dropped it to the floor, rubbing her breasts as she stroked his chest, bending his dark head to suck her nipples and feel the wild slam of her heartbeat.

  He shed his clothes with urgency, coming back to her naked, and she moaned in delirium at the sight of him, her hands moving over him as she whispered, 'Let me touch you... let me make love to you...'

  Mark stared down at her, sweat sheening his skin as her fingers sought and found him and he gave a long, low strangled cry of pleasure, then closed his eyes, drawing ragged breaths as she stroked him, staring at him in a longing to show her love physically, make love to the man, give him everything she possibly could that would pleasure him...

  He bent his head suddenly, kissing her fiercely, and his hands stripped her until they were both naked, sliding together, their limbs tangling, and the excitement was so fierce that Caroline was aware of a blood-beat in her body of such violent frenzy that it could only explode, shatteringly, soon, very soon...

  'I love you!' Mark bit out thickly, and she felt the thrust of him sliding inside her as his fingers gripped her tighter and he moaned hoarsely, 'Oh, God, Caro...I love you like crazy...'

  She cried out in agonised pleasure as their bodies merged, and suddenly he was moving against her, possessing her utterly, filling her with that heavy maleness, completely her master, driving into her again and again, his face dark red with desire, eyes glittering, breath coming in harsh, rapid gasps and she felt the excitement explode, sending her spasming all the way back down through that build-up of exquisite tension, clutching blindly at him as her body found hot, wet liberty impaled on his, and she heard his groans of disbelieving pleasure as he watched her face contorting and her body writhing, until his body was catapulted into violent ecstasy and it was her turn to watch.

  Later, he said against her damp throat, 'Now I know why I was so overwhelmingly attracted to you. I must have been in love with you from the very beginning.' He lifted his head, sweat on his lashes. 'I just didn't recognise it. Didn't want to. I've hated the thought of love and marriage all my life. I was bound to kick and punch it when I met it.'

  Caroline laughed huskily, stroking his sweat-gleaming throat. 'And I've always hated the very men I'm sexually attracted to. It's.. .it's about as close as you can get to another person—isn't it?'

  He smiled. 'Yes...' Then jealousy blazed in his eyes. 'What do you mean? You've felt this way before? About other men?'

  'Not like this,' she reassured him huskily. 'Never like this. But I have occasionally met men I felt an attraction to and I've always avoided them like the plague.'

  'What does that make me?' he drawled wryly.

  'It makes you the one who changed me forever.'

  His black lashes flickered. 'Did you really never want to make love with Stephen Daly?' he asked, a trace of savage jealousy in his voice.

  'I didn't even want to kiss him,' she confessed with a sigh. 'To be honest, I think I started to get involved with him as an escape from my feelings for you. I was so aware of you, Mark, so intensely excited by you every time I saw you...'

  He smiled and kissed her mouth lingeringly. 'The minute I saw you put that swine's ring on your finger at the Ritz...' He shook his dark head, eyes wry. 'My God, I felt waves of the most intense jealousy. I can remember looking across the restaurant at you and wanting to kill you, to kill you both. I felt like a savage. How I controlled myself, I'll never know.'

  'You were rather savage that night,' she said softly, watching him through her lashes.

  'I went home and raged for hours, trying to tell myself I didn't give a damn what you did or whether I never saw you again in my life, but of course I did. I cared far too much. I'd been after you for months, and suddenly I knew I had to have you, no matter what the cost. That's when I came up with that plan. To get you to Cornwall, make you admit you wanted me to make love to you, and then offer to make you my mistress.'

  Her eyes narrowed. 'Yes, I was very offended by that offer.'

  'I know,' he drawled with a grimace. 'It was stupid of me. I knew perfectly well you weren't my usual type of woman. Ladies like Venetia Blake and her predecessors were only too eager to go to bed with me. I didn't have to offer them apartments or fast cars, although I did occasionally buy them diamonds and --'

  'Stop it,' she said thickly, her hands tightening on his broad shoulders. 'I don't want to hear about it, Mark! My God, what do you think I'm made of? Stone?'

  'I'm trying to explain how --'

  Angrily, she pushed away from him, saying hoarsely, 'I'm jealous of them! All of them! Any woman who's made love to you before is a threat because I did this out of love, and I believed you did it out of love and I can't tolerate the thought of --'

  'Darling,' he said deeply, holding her, pushing her face into his damp throat where a pulse still beat, 'you have no need to be jealous of any of them. I didn't love them. I just wanted to go to bed with them.'

  'Was Venetia your mistress?' she asked thickly, pain flooding her in waves.

  'No,' he said wryly, and drew back to look at her in silence for a moment before saying thickly, 'Caroline, I hate to have to admit it, but I haven't been able to look at another woman since the day you walked into my office.'

  She watched him jealously through her lashes. 'Is that the truth? Or are you just trying to make me feel better?'

  'It's the truth,' he said deeply. 'You rammed into my bloodstream from that first day, and no other woman has attracted me since. I kept Venetia hanging around for a number of reasons, mainly because I've been a complete bastard with women all my life. But also because I couldn't bring myself to admit I felt so much for you.'

  'Poor Venetia...' she said with a pained frown.

  'Don't feel too much compassion for her,' he drawled wryly. 'She's in love with a French count who just married a film star and left Venetia without a backward glance. I didn't hurt her by keeping; her around. In fact, I probably helped her get over the count.'

  Caroline studied his hard, handsome face. Love washed over her in waves so strong that she suddenly felt weak
with it, her eyes moving over her lover, her love, her soulmate.

  'I remember the day I first looked into your eyes,' she said huskily. 'I remember it so clearly. That instant recognition...'

  He smiled slowly, saying deeply, 'My twin soul. But we're in such different bodies, my love.'

  'I suppose,' she said softly, 'that's why we're built to blend.'

  He kissed her mouth lingeringly. 'You will blend with me forever, won't you? Marry me, I mean. I'm sorry it wasn't a serious proposal when it came, but I was desperate to stop you leaving me, leaving the firm. I was so heavily in love with you and I had to hold fast to the belief that it had happened to you, too, in that snowbound cottage. I couldn't let myself believe for one second that you had felt nothing. I would just have died of the pain...'

  'Of course I'll marry you,' she said huskily, kissing him. 'But only because it's the way it's done.'

  'No white dress or orange blossom?' he teased.

  'They're irrelevant,' she said softly, love filling her. 'All that's important is your soul and mine twinned together forever. Marrying you is just a way of announcing that joint love to the rest of the world.'

  He smiled. 'Funny how everything changes when you fall in love. The oddest things suddenly make sense.'

  She laughed and kissed him, burying her face in his neck.

  He stroked her hair tenderly. 'We could have children, too...' he said carefully.

  She felt even weaker with love. 'Oh, darling, yes. Children...'

  He expelled his breath unsteadily. 'Thank God for that! I was afraid for one minute you would tell me your feelings about children had changed and you wanted to wait—or, worse, not have any at all.'

  She raised her head to look at him. 'No, Mark. My feelings about children have changed—but it's a deepening, not a reversal, like the way I feel about marriage.' A smile touched her mouth and she said softly, 'I see children as creative lovemaking now. Our souls and bodies in a magic fusion that creates life.'

  'Darling,' he said unsteadily, his eyes darkening, 'let's make life.'