by JoAnn Durgin
“Look,” Josh said, standing and moving over to her, “it was a mistake for me to come over here tonight. We’ve had an emotional week and we’re both tired. But I missed you today, Winnie. Missed Chloe. There wasn’t an hour that went by that I didn’t look at the clock and wonder what you were doing, what you were thinking. I wondered what new words Chloe was learning and wished I could be the one reading a book to her.” He stepped closer. “You know as well as I do we have a deep connection. Call it shared history, call it romance, call it sparks, call it chemistry, call it whatever you want.”
Taking hold of her arms—enough to keep her still but not hard enough to hurt—he forced her to look at him. At least she didn’t fight him, and he prayed she knew he’d never hurt her. “Call it Chloe.”
Staring at the carpet, he gathered his thoughts. His hands slid down her arms, releasing his hold. “You know where to find me if you want to talk,” he said. “I’ll try my best not to call you or see you, although that’s not what I want. Selfishly, I want to spend every waking moment here in Houston with you and Chloe before I go back to Louisiana and I don’t have much time left. To be honest, I should have gone back several days ago, but it’s like somehow I knew I needed to stay. Something kept me here. It’s difficult to find out something like this and then stay away. But, like I said, I’ll take whatever you have to offer. No more, no less.”
Her eyes were wet. “I’m not asking you to love me, Josh.” Winnie looked more vulnerable than he’d ever seen her. Her voice was quiet, her lips taut.
“And all I’m asking is the opportunity to let me love you.” He tweaked her chin. “Like it or not, you and I are tied together the rest of our lives. Now that I know about Chloe, I’m not about to let her go. I’m not going anywhere, and I’m not walking away from my responsibility as a father. You can push me out of your life if you want, but there’s no way I’ll ever let her go. That’s not a threat. It’s a promise.” Turning and heading to the front door, he paused to see if she followed.
“I just need time to think,” she said, coming to stand beside him. He hated the thought of leaving her and Chloe behind when he went home to Baton Rouge. The whole concept of home didn’t make much sense any more. At least getting back into the routine at the firm would restore normalcy and help him regain some perspective. Problem was, he dreaded it all.
“This is all too overwhelming. My quiet, simple life has been turned upside down in a matter of days,” Winnie said. When her eyes met his, they softened.
“Tell me about it.” Josh moved in before she had a chance to protest and captured her lips, trying to convey with his kiss what his words hadn’t accomplished. She didn’t push him away, didn’t deny the simmering passion beneath the surface as his hands moved around her waist, pulling her to him. Winnie slowly crawled her hands up his chest—a move he knew was uncalculated but did things to him she couldn’t begin to comprehend—and moved them to the back of his neck, fingering the curls at the base of his collar. He loved it before, he loved it now. She’d been an innocent in San Antonio, and she was still an innocent in all the ways that counted most.
“Josh.” He’d heard about women whimpering and thought it was some silly term coined for drugstore romance novels but the sound escaping Winnie’s lips—still on his—could only be described as a whimper. It was one of the most incredible sounds he’d ever heard, but this needed to stop before his thoughts got carried away any further than they already were.
Trying not to be abrupt, he pulled her hands away from his neck, being as gentle as he could. He stepped back, kissing one open palm and then the other. Based on her reaction, that gesture did something to her. He wasn’t sure which of the two of them trembled more, and it wasn’t from fear. Desire in human form had a name, a face. For his sanity, he needed to leave now and pray he stayed strong. In that moment, he understood more than ever what Sam meant about geographical distance sometimes being the best thing. Didn’t make it any easier, but it was for the best.
“I’ve never forced my affections on a woman and I’m not about to start now, but your kiss didn’t lie.” He planted another soft kiss on her cheek. “That one’s for Chloe. Good night, Winnie.”
Although he didn’t look back as he opened the front door and walked to his car, Josh knew she watched him, hopefully wishing that—one of these days—he wouldn’t have to walk away ever again.
Chapter 22
Saturday, Early Morning
Lexa paced the kitchen floor and chewed her lower lip. “What do you suggest we do?”
Glancing at the clock on the wall, Winnie noted it was almost seven. They had a full day ahead of them, especially since getting the phone call late the night before imploring them to take this last-minute catering assignment. A huge one that would normally take days—if not a couple of weeks—to plan and execute. The payoff? If they could pull off this event for the large Houston corporation with any degree of success, it had the potential to generate a steady stream of sizable and profitable contracts.
“Please have a little faith in your partner.” Somehow, Winnie managed to sound more confident than she felt. “You know, you’ve adopted Sam’s habit of chewing his lip.” Inside, she was quaking, too, but she wasn’t about to cave into the pressure. At least one of them needed to stay strong, and it would help take her mind off the whole situation with Josh and refocus her energies. “It’s just another job, sweetie. Repeat after me: we can do this.”
“But it’s so last minute and such a large reception,” Lexa said, looking at her as though she’d lost valuable brain cells. “It’s official. I’ve lost my mind. Tell me why in the world did I ever say yes? I’ve got a baby and a husband and I can’t just drop everything in my life to chase some catering job that may or may not be the end of our business.”
Winnie smiled and nudged Lexa’s mug across the counter. “Do me a favor. Sit down and take a long, slow sip of this coffee. Then take a bite of one of these peach tarts.” She took one from the tray and put it on a napkin between them. “They’re to die for, if I don’t say so myself, and this is the reason we do it.” She watched as Lexa took a sip of the coffee and nibbled the tart. “Besides, it’ll help pay our bills for a couple of months and bring us more potential clients than we’ll know what to do with. That’s a good problem to have.”
She sipped her coffee, enjoying the last few quiet minutes before they’d start to work with furious ambition. “I feel sorry for the poor caterer who backed out or lost this job. This fiasco is certainly not going to be a coup for their business, but they’ve called on us, and we need to take the opportunity and run with it. Fly with it and not look back. Think about it,” she said, draining her coffee and taking the mug to the sink, running water over it. “The way I see it, it’s the best thing that could have happened to get our name out there.” Leaning back against the counter, she crossed her arms.
Lexa finished her coffee and the eyes she turned on Winnie were wide, almost frightened. “Promise me one thing.”
Winnie nodded. “Sure. Anything.”
“We need to hire more help as soon as possible.”
They’d talked about it, but the need hadn’t been pressing until now. She’d mentioned it to a few of the young mothers at church as a part-time opportunity but hadn’t yet made any firm commitments. Neither one of them had any way of knowing this job would drop into their laps like manna from Heaven.
Lexa’s words brought her back to the present. “For now, what do you suggest we do about the party tonight?” she asked. “Should we make some calls to the ladies at church? Promise them anything they want, short of my firstborn?” Her smile looked nervous.
“I’ll call Marta and Gayle,” Winnie said, forcing a calm into her tone. “I’m sure they’ll help out if they can. Cassie might be able to help, too.”
“Good idea.” The lines of tension on her friend’s forehead relaxed. “I know where we can probably find two handsome servers. We just have to treat them real nice
and give them lots of loving or whatever they need.” She ignored Winnie’s withering look. Standing and carrying her mug to the sink, she turned to face her. “Desperate times and all that.”
“I don’t think so,” Winnie said. “Josh and I need some time. I refuse to ask him to help. No way could I pass off something like this without making me sound like a clingy, needy woman desperate for his attention. It’s the worst kind of ploy. Do what you want with Sam, but I couldn’t respect myself in the morning.”
“Oh, get over it. What’s to think about?” Pushing her long, blonde braid behind one shoulder, Lexa’s hands traveled to her hips. Winnie had seen this stance more than a few times, the stubborn defiance etched into her friend’s pretty features. Lexa stared her down, those aquamarine eyes sparking with deep emotion. No wonder Sam could never resist the little fireball. “The way I see it, we don’t have a choice today. This is our livelihood.” She dropped her hands and turned. “Fine. If needed, I’ll beg Sam and he’ll ask Josh.”
Enough talk. It was time to focus on the daunting task staring them in the face. Grabbing her clipboard, Winnie pulled out the notes she’d made after answering Lexa’s frantic call the night before. She hoped her scribbles were decipherable since she’d been reeling from Josh’s kiss at the time. It was amazing what the man could do with the sheer power of one kiss. Her cheeks grew warm. It wasn’t the time to think about that now.
“Please don’t tell me you’re pushing Josh away,” Lexa said, pulling out baking trays. So, she’s not going to give up. Under normal circumstances, it was one of her partner’s best traits. “You can’t allow pride to stand in your way, Winnie. Besides, Josh is a peach.” She paused, one hand on the refrigerator door. “Everything around here is always about peaches, huh? It’s that ridiculous obsession of Sam’s. It even has me consumed with thinking about them.”
Winnie stared through blind eyes at the list. “There’s an awful lot to admire about Josh.” She stopped short of uttering the word love. “This—whatever it is with him—is still so raw and fresh. I’m not sure at this point how we can even think about a future together.”
“Now you’re talking complete nonsense. Why not? Give me one good, valid reason.”
“Spoken by the woman who could write the book on falling in love in eight weeks or less.” Regretting the sarcasm in her tone, Winnie took a deep breath and lowered her voice. “One big consideration is that Josh lives in Baton Rouge. He has a flourishing career as a very successful attorney, not to mention all the good work he does for the community. Plus, his family lives nearby and he likes to fly off for hurricane relief efforts as often as possible.”
“Those are just details and you know it.” Lexa waved her hand in dismissal. “Mere excuses. You know what I think?”
“Not really, but I don’t think I have a choice in the matter.” She lowered the clipboard to the counter, pulled out a counter stool and sat down again. “I’m listening. Get it out.” She waved her hand. “You won’t rest until you do.”
Lexa’s brows knit together. “I think you want to explore a relationship with Josh, but you’re scared to let anyone into your life. You’ve had to raise Chloe on your own with very little help and certainly no help from a man. You’re scared to let him get too close because you’re reluctant to relinquish any control over your life, and especially Chloe’s. You’re doing a spectacular job with her, but you can’t be everything to that child. All I’m saying is, don’t be afraid to open yourself up to love.”
“Well, thank you for that psychological analysis,” Winnie snapped. “You of all people know how important it is I don’t mess up with Chloe. My childhood wasn’t normal by any stretch of the imagination and my primary concern has to be on giving my child what I didn’t have.”
Lexa stared her down. “Seems to me that should include giving Chloe a stable father figure. After all, Josh is—”
Winnie let out an exasperated sigh. “Don’t you think I’ve thought about all that, Lexa? Think about if you had Joe on your own and were raising him without Sam beside you, holding your hand, singing him to sleep in the rocker while you rest.” She ignored Lexa’s frown at that pointed barb. “Put yourself in my shoes for one little minute and I think you might have a whole different perspective. It’s a lot to consider and—”
“No, that’s where you’re wrong.”
“About which part, exactly?” They stared at one another for a long moment.
“Whoa! Do you two need a referee?” Sam pushed open the swinging door, yawning, still in his sleep shorts and T-shirt. “I could hear you from the living room.” His newspaper was rolled in one hand, his glasses perched on the end of his nose, his hair disheveled. He kissed his wife’s cheek. “Morning, beautiful girl.”
Winnie turned away, averting her eyes. It was all good and well they felt so comfortable around her to be affectionate and playful, but it stung her heart even more since Josh came to town. “Oh, we’re not really fighting, handsome cowboy,” she said, sliding off the counter stool and retrieving her purse. Sam looked amused at her use of Lexa’s pet nickname for him, but Lexa frowned. Great, the woman still isn’t done.
“Sam, this is nuts,” Lexa said. “Maybe I missed my calling, misread the signs from God or something.” She started opening cabinets, pulling out pans and baking utensils. When she got stressed, she went to work, busying herself to keep her mind occupied.
“You didn’t miss your calling. My earlier psychology comment aside, you’d make my psychologist-of-the-year list any old day,” Winnie said, musing aloud more than anything else. “You’re actually uncanny at figuring people out, what makes them tick, how their parents warped their lives, that kind of thing. Not that I don’t appreciate it.” Winnie raised her head as both Sam and Lexa turned to look at her. She gulped. “Did I say that out loud? Sorry.” She ducked her head, sat back down and put her purse beside her as she started to work on the list of supplies and ingredients.
Lexa blew out a sigh. “At least in financial planning, I had time to prepare for client meetings and presentations. Things were orderly, planned, and rarely were there unexpected surprises or last-minute panics, but now I get a call at ten o’clock one night, and then we’re expected to serve a buffet-style dinner for two hundred people the following night?” She threw her hands in the air. “It’s madness!”
Sam’s smile lines deepened and Winnie shot him a look. Humor would be ill-advised, but somehow the man always knew how to calm his wife. “Lexa. Baby.” Putting both hands on her shoulders, he tilted her chin. “This is a job like all the others. You take it one step at a time, and skip a few steps if you can. Call in your helpers early, if they can come. I’ll offer my services, and if he’s not working, I’m sure Josh will help, too.”
He darted a glance at the clock on the kitchen wall. “I’m going to grab a quick shower and then come back down, so have your list ready.” His look encompassed them both. “Hopefully, you’ll have your differences settled by then. Keep in mind I’ll probably have Josh with me and I don’t think you want him to hear your discussion.” He paused on his way out the door. “Are those peach tarts I see?”
Winnie waved her hand with a small smile. “Help yourself. I made them especially for you, Captain TeamWork.”
“And that’s why I love you so much.” He winked at his wife as he took one from the tray. “Hang onto her, Lexa. She’s a keeper.” Murmuring his thanks, Sam popped the tart in his mouth with a sigh of satisfaction before disappearing into the living room.
“Listen, we’ve only got a few minutes so here’s the thing,” Lexa said, planting herself beside her at the counter. “I could better understand your reluctance at giving up control if it was anyone other than one of our TeamWork guys, but we’re talking about Josh Grant.”
Winnie fumbled in her purse for her new tube of lip gloss. Her lips were dry, but more than that, she needed something to do to avoid Lexa’s penetrating look. Mrs. Lewis had perfected it. Must have something to do
with living with Sam. Not much got past these two.
Lexa stepped closer to where she sat at the counter. “Does this have anything to do with Josh’s past?”
Winnie paused in the middle of slicking on the gloss. She rubbed her lips together and shook her head. “You know, you’d think it would, but it really doesn’t.” She rolled the tube of gloss in her hand before looking back at Lexa. “Josh has been nothing but honest with me and I believe him. He’s done his time, paid his penance, all that.” Her flippancy quotient was set at high today and the day had barely begun. Turning her head, she blew out a breath.
“Josh is falling in love with you, Winnie. Actually, I think he’s already there, and he fell in love with Chloe at first sight, even before knowing—” She stopped and her eyes grew wide.
Winnie’s heart skipped a few beats. “You know?” It wasn’t really a surprise and, in reality, a great relief to get it out in the open. The last few days had certainly been full of revelations. Definitely a “Dear Diary” week in the annals of her life.
After a long moment, Lexa nodded. “That’s why I never had to ask.”
“Are you shocked? Disappointed in me?” She released a light groan.
“Banish the thought. How could I ever be disappointed in you?”
“Because—”
Chloe’s voice came through the monitor from Joseph’s nursery. She’d carried her upstairs thirty minutes ago, still asleep, after arriving at the house, nestling her in the toddler bed Sam recently assembled and set up in the corner of the nursery. Although they didn’t say anything, Winnie suspected it was for Chloe. “Joey,” her daughter said, “my mommy has a new friend named Mr. Josh. He’s sleeping here in your house right now. He’s handsome like a prince and he loves my mommy. Then I’ll have a family, just like you.”
Winnie clamped a hand over her mouth, willing the tears not to fall. “I don’t know if I can deal with this today.”