Christmas Haven

by Hope White

  “Jules, stop. Suzy’s death was an accident.”

  “We don’t know that for sure. But if I’d gone to her house that night she wouldn’t have taken the boat out by herself. She wouldn’t have—”

  Morgan pulled her to his chest. “Shh. Don’t do this to yourself. That’s a heavy load you’ve been carrying, sweetheart. And it’s unnecessary.”

  She leaned back and looked into his eyes. “What kind of person abandons the people she loves? What is the matter with me?”

  “You didn’t abandon those boys, Andy and Dane, even though caring about them put you in danger.”

  “Great, I stick by strangers over the people closest to me.”

  “Look, Suzy did what she was going to do regardless of whether you went to her that night or not. You couldn’t control her decision any more than I could control yours to leave Port Whisper.”

  “But—”

  “Do you blame yourself for every runaway who walks through your door? Are you responsible for their choices?”

  “No, I guess not.”

  “But a part of you thinks you are.” Julie shrugged.

  “You felt guilty about Suzy so you chose a profession where you could save kids. I get that. But, Jules, at some point the people you love or the kids you counsel have to make their own decisions, they have to have faith in themselves and God for a better life. Suzy’s parents should have been there for her first and foremost, then her pastor, friends and neighbors. Her death was not your fault.”

  “It feels like it.”

  “You’re holding on to a lot of guilt that isn’t deserved. I’d suggest praying to God for forgiveness, but I suspect this is more about you forgiving yourself.”

  The thought of forgiving herself had never entered her mind.

  “We’d better go.” As he led her up the trail to the boat, her cell phone rang.

  “Hello?” she answered.

  Silence. Her heart slammed against her chest. Was it another threatening call?

  “Hello?” she tried again, glancing at Morgan.

  “Miss Burns, it’s Andy.”

  SEVEN

  Andy, the first missing boy. Julie’s heart leaped into her throat.

  “Andy? How did you get this number?” she asked.

  “I got it from Mr. Pratt. He said you’ve been looking for me.”

  “I’ve been worried. You disappeared and—”

  “I’m fine. Where are you?”

  “I’m visiting friends.”

  “Where, in Seattle?”

  “Andy, what’s wrong? You sound upset.”

  “I said I’m fine,” he croaked. “Are you coming back?”

  “Eventually, but—”

  “Here’s Mr. Pratt.”

  A few seconds passed.

  “I thought you’d feel better if you heard from Andy,” William said.

  “Is he okay?”

  “Seems good to me. I’ve got him set up to stay in a halfway house tonight.”

  “But he was missing for a week. Did he say where he was, what happened?”

  William hesitated. “He’s not saying much. I don’t want to press and have him disappear again.”

  “True. William, thank you so much for having him call.”

  “Sure thing. You take care.”

  “You, too.”

  Julie ended the call and glanced up into Morgan’s amazing eyes.

  “It was Andy. He’s okay.”

  “Then what’s bothering you?” he asked as they rejoined the group.

  “Something in his voice sounded off. He asked where I was and when I’m coming back. I’m worried, Morgan.”

  “One thing at a time. Let’s get back to town and go over your files again. The sooner we puzzle through this, the sooner you’ll be safe, and be able to return to Seattle and your kids.”

  As she sat across the desk from him, Morgan sensed Julie was a tangle of nerves. She’d been spooked on the island and he’d managed to calm her down. Yet he couldn’t take any chances, and asked Deputy Chief Scott Finnegan to go through fishing permits to see if he could track down who was driving the motorboat they’d heard.

  Morgan doubted her stalker would go to the trouble of renting a boat and following her out there on the off chance he’d get her alone. Yet by wandering off she’d been isolated, making herself an easier target than when she was surrounded by family and friends in Port Whisper.

  She wasn’t thinking clearly, thanks to the ghosts of her past. Morgan wished he could say the right words to help her release the guilt about Suzy, but he knew that kind of absolution had to come from inside a person’s heart.

  One thing was for sure, her raw emotions triggered by the past were affecting her judgment. Which meant he’d have to think for the both of them in order to keep her safe.

  An image of what could have happened on the island if it had, in fact, been her stalker, flashed across his mind. When he’d found her she’d been completely vulnerable, lying on the ground looking…

  Dead.

  His adrenaline had spiked big-time when he’d first caught sight of her motionless body.

  Morgan rolled his neck and refocused on the papers in front of him. Did no good to go to that dark place again. As long as Julie was either at Dad’s house or surrounded by people, Morgan was pretty sure she’d be okay. Besides, there was no evidence that her stalker knew she’d temporarily relocated to Port Whisper. As long as they kept her location a secret, they were good.

  “What are we looking for?” she asked.

  “Connections to anything unusual or dangerous. Tell me about Dane, the boy who was abducted. What was his family like? Does he have any brothers? What’s his background in general?”

  “High-school dropout, but a very smart boy. I encouraged him to get his GED, but no luck so far.”

  “Parents? Siblings?”

  “Two brothers, younger, in foster care. His dad lost his job due to his drinking, and he’s been in and out of jail for minor stuff. His mom abandoned them when Dane was twelve.” Julie’s gaze shot up to meet Morgan’s. “Sorry.”

  “For what?”

  “His mom, your mom. I mean, if it brings back bad memories.”

  “I’ve moved on, Jules. I won’t lie, Mom’s leaving affected my entire life, but it’s pointless to hold on to the anger.”

  She glanced back at her paperwork. “Lecture alert.”

  “I wouldn’t dare. I remember how I hated lectures when we were kids.”

  Julie snapped her eyes up to meet his. “But we’re not kids anymore, are we?”

  It felt as if she’d punched him in the gut. She never missed a chance to remind him that their past was way behind them and it was irrelevant to the present.

  Too bad, she’d never convince him. Her life choices were born from events of her past, as were Morgan’s. You couldn’t deny the past; you had to learn from it. Somehow he’d make her understand that.

  As he strategized ways to soften her to the idea, he realized she was still staring at him with those golden eyes. He fought the urge to reach out and place his hand over hers, comfort her, let her know it would all be okay.

  And that he’d forgiven her.

  He snapped his gaze from hers and refocused on the folder in front of him. A part of him still didn’t want to forgive, but rather hold on to the fire of resentment, if for no other reason than to protect himself from what this woman could do to him…again.

  But she could only hurt him if he gave in to the dream of them getting back together and living happily ever after in Port Whisper. That was not even close to any kind of reality. He pushed the thought aside, and realized he needed to move on by whatever means possible. Yeah, how are you going to do that when she’s living under the same roof?

  “Did you find something?” she asked, eyeing him.

  His inner turmoil must be showing on his face. “Nope, just need more coffee.” He got up and refilled his mug. “Can I get you some?”

  “N
o, I’m good.”

  And she was. Still beautiful, smart and perfect in every way.

  Snap out of it, Wright.

  “What about Andy, the boy who went missing? What’s he like?” Morgan asked.

  “He’s guarded, tough.” She glanced at him. “Reminds me of you when you were his age.”

  “Getting into trouble, yeah, that sounds like me.”

  “No, I meant all that other stuff—how you made me laugh, how you acted like nothing bothered you, when I knew it did. Andy does that, too. He acts like everything’s okay when I know it’s not.”

  “Probably has to if he lives on the streets.”

  “Yeah, but he has a gentle side.” She fingered her silver locket. “He gave me this, even showed me the receipt to prove he didn’t steal it.”

  Morgan eyed the gift, a silver butterfly locket.

  “What pictures do you have inside?” He couldn’t help asking.

  “Actually, it doesn’t open, but that’s okay. The fact he used money he earned doing cleanup for the city means a lot to me.”

  “He appreciates what you’ve done for him.” Morgan settled behind his desk.

  “Yeah, well, it wasn’t easy at first. He was rude and cynical. I didn’t take it personally, but after months of his attitude I’d finally had it and called him out. That was a big turning point. He looked at me differently after that, with more respect, I guess.”

  “He learned you weren’t a pushover.”

  “Yep, and I didn’t let him get away with excuses. I helped Andy and Dane find temporary work doing festival cleanup, and Dane got a job at a pizza place. There was real hope for him.”

  “Is, Julie. There still is hope for him.”

  “I guess. He’s strong and resilient. He could be okay.”

  Although she said the words, Morgan suspected she had little faith in their truth.

  “Did Andy and Dane know each other? We should have asked Andy if he’d heard from Dane.”

  “They were friends, but I sensed they drifted apart when Dane got the job at the pizza place. Andy, well, he never saw much value in getting a regular job. He covers pretty well, but I sense he suffers from low self-esteem.”

  “Which makes him a prime candidate for drug abuse.” Morgan tapped his pen to the folder on his desk. “What was Dane into?”

  “He was working on kicking his meth habit. He was really determined.”

  “Did he ever deal?”

  “I don’t think so. Where are you going with this?”

  “We have to assume his abduction had something to do with the drug culture. If he was a dealer, he had to get the drugs from somewhere and perhaps he was skimming off the top.”

  “No, I told you he had a real job.”

  “Jules, real jobs don’t pay as well as dealing drugs.”

  “He was coming clean, completely. He wanted a stable life, wanted to go back to school, get married, have children…” Her voice trailed off and she glanced absently out the office window.

  This line of questioning was upsetting her, so he backed off, closed his file and stood. “How about I take you back to the house? I’ve got some other police business I need to deal with. We can pick this up later.”

  “Okay, sure. I’m sorry if I’m taking you away from real work.”

  “This case is real work.”

  “I know, but I’m not even a resident of Port Whisper.”

  Morgan’s desk phone rang and he grabbed it. “Chief Wright.”

  “I’ll never get used to hearing those two words together,” Ethan joked.

  “Is that jealousy I hear in your voice?”

  “More like respect. I see what our chief of D’s goes through on a regular basis. I couldn’t do it. Listen, we got a lead on Dane Simms. Someone thought they spotted a boy fitting his description last night in Denny Park.”

  “Doing what?” Morgan glanced at Jules.

  “Running. That’s why the ID is questionable. But the kid was wearing the coat and baseball cap Julie described and was about his height and weight. Someone called 9-1-1 but he eluded the patrolmen. Thought you should know.”

  “So he’s alive, too.”

  “Too?”

  “The first missing boy, Andy, called Julie this morning from the Teen Life office. Said he was okay, but Julie sensed something was off.”

  “She might have to reevaluate if she’s overreacting about these kids.”

  “That doesn’t explain someone breaking into her office, and the threatening calls.”

  “I’m just saying, it’s possible they’re not related and your girlfriend might be into something she hasn’t told you about.”

  “She’s not… Never mind. Keep me posted. Thanks for calling, E.”

  “Think about it.”

  Morgan hung up and led Julie to the door.

  “You’re upset,” she said. “What did he say?”

  “They think they spotted Dane running through Denny Park last night.”

  “Running? From what?”

  “Not sure. Could he have been high and freaking out?”

  “No, I told you, he was clean. What else did Ethan say?”

  He opened the door for her and they went outside. “That Dane’s abduction might have nothing to do with whoever’s stalking you.” Morgan placed his hands on her shoulders. “Is there anything you haven’t told me, anything at all?”

  “Like what? Something illegal?”

  “No, that’s not what I’m asking.”

  “But the thought crossed your mind. Really, Morgan? You know me better than that.”

  “Ethan doesn’t. He’s asking the question.”

  “Is he? You sure?”

  “Jules, we need to explore all options here. Did you make someone angry or let someone down?”

  “I live a pretty dull life, Morgan. Every day I fight an uphill battle to help street kids, I go home, eat and sleep. Then it all starts again.”

  “Who would benefit from you being out of the picture?”

  “No one. I mean, I guess a few of the junior counselors, if they wanted to move up in the food chain, but honestly, Morgan, the money’s not worth hurting me over.”

  “Someone’s trying to scare you away. You having problems with anyone at work?”

  She rubbed her forefinger and thumb against her locket. It appeared to be a touchstone, something to ground her. He wished he’d given it to her.

  “Well, there’s Helen but no, she’s all bark and no bite.”

  “Last name?”

  “Sutter.”

  He pulled a notebook from his pocket and wrote it down. “Do you know where she lives?”

  “Morgan, I’m sure she’s not involved. I mean, she’s resentful of my position, but—”

  Morgan looked up. “Resentful how?”

  “I sense she’s jealous that I connect so easily with the kids. She’s more of a mother type and tends to lecture, so they shy away from her.”

  “Does she have children of her own?”

  “She has a daughter. Her son died when he was a teenager. He got drunk and wrapped his car around a tree. Sometimes I feel like she’s in this line of work to make up for not being there for him. It’s so tragic, but it wasn’t her fault.”

  Morgan wondered why she couldn’t give herself that same kind of compassion and understanding in regards to Suzy.

  “Has she ever made threats?”

  “No, nothing like that.”

  “Where does she live, Jules?”

  “Seattle. Ballard, I think.”

  “I’ll check it out.” Morgan walked her to his truck and opened the door. “Let’s get you home.”

  Later that day, Julie and Edith had just started preparing supper when Lana called to check in, heard Mom was making her specialty—baked honey-nut chicken, broccoli and herbed biscuits—and invited herself over.

  Mom had spent the day reorganizing, cleaning and washing windows to let in the light. The house almost felt warm and welcoming
. Almost. The dark walls and cherry furniture still cast a bleak shadow throughout the downstairs living area. Julie knew that wouldn’t last long if Mom had her way. Julie could just see Mom tying up her hair in her red bandanna and getting to work with a bucket of paint.

  “Lana said Ashley might be joining her, and where Ashley goes, Sketch follows.” Mom shot Julie a smile over her shoulder as she put the biscuits in the oven.

  “Should we call Morgan and ask if that’s okay?” Julie asked.

  “He won’t mind. He’s very gracious that way, although he’s been a bit cranky lately. Company will cheer him up.”

  “He’s worried about his father, huh?” Julie rinsed broccoli spears in the sink.

  “No, actually, I think he’s made peace with the Lord about his father’s condition. He’s been more guarded since you came home.”

  “Why? I can’t hurt him. He hates me.”

  “He could never hate you, sweetie.”

  “It’s okay, I deserve it.”

  Mom turned off the water and with two gentle hands to her shoulders, turned Julie to face her. “Stop beating yourself up. We all make mistakes, and we’re forgiven through the Lord’s love.”

  “Do you think I made a mistake breaking up with Morgan?”

  With a sigh, Mom rubbed her hand down Julie’s arm. Just as she was about to speak, the back door burst open and Lana breezed into the kitchen, Ashley right behind her.

  “Smells good,” Lana said, cracking the oven door.

  “Hey.” Mom grabbed a dish towel and snapped it at Ashley’s backside. “No peeking. I just put those in.”

  “The chicken looks amazing, too.” Lana smiled.

  “What can I get you girls to drink?” Mom offered.

  “I’m good,” Lana said, flopping down at the kitchen table. “I overdid it on the cider.”

  “How about you, Ashley?”

  “Do you have any hot chocolate?”

  “I think Caroline dropped off cocoa in her care package yesterday. Let me see…”

  As her mother dug into one of the two grocery bags, Julie sat next to Lana, and Ashley joined them.

  “How was the rest of your day?” Julie asked.

  “Fan-tastic. Most of the tourists came into the snack shop for lunch, which kept us busy.”