Lights on the Far Horizon Trilogy

by Stone, Sailor

  Obeying her passionate command was the easiest thing Tanner ever did and as the waves of her desire swept over him he pushed his own love deep into her and then he lost all track of time and space and then all he could hear was her deep breaths as she rested. He held her tight.

  27

  Lights on the Far Horizon

  Kinsey was dreaming. Bark and Jessie were waving to her from their father’s arms. And then someone was waking her. She knew it was a dream and she didn’t want to wake up. She wanted to go see them but the hand kept shaking her and then finally she opened her eyes.

  Her hotel room was bright with sunlight and she could smell the ocean. Anywhere you went on Bermuda, you could smell the salt of the sea. She liked that. Then she saw Tanner’s face. He was sitting on the bed next to her.

  “Are you alright? That was some dream,” he asked. He put his hand to hers and gently squeezed.

  “I miss being with my family, Tanner. I was about to be with you and the twins again. I miss my babies, Tanner.”

  Tanner stood from the bed, “Well, we have one more thing to do and then all of that can be taken care of. We’ll go see Bark and Jessie. Get up and get ready. Let’s go.” Tanner reached out and pulled Kinsey up from the bed by the hand.

  “Why so fast?”

  I want to take you to where I’ve been staying. I want you to see something.”

  “Okay, I need a shower first.”

  “I can help you with that.” Tanner led her into the bathroom and shut the door behind them.

  Kinsey had her arms around Tanner as she rode behind him on the scooter to the place he’d been staying as he had watched over her during the past week. The ride took them down winding roads then back up more winding roads until they came to a driveway that led up to a secluded place. Then, at the end of the winding drive, Kinsey found herself looking at a massive house that she thought might be a Bed and Breakfast Inn but when she asked, Tanner said it was only a house that he’d found on the internet and rented by phone.

  “Why so big? Especially since it was just you staying here?” Kinsey asked as Tanner led her to the front door.

  “That’s what I wanted to show you. Now come inside.” Tanner took her by the hand and led her through the door into a large open living room.

  “Surprise!”

  Tanner watched Kinsey as her mind tried to take in what just happened. Standing before her was her best friend Jessica and her husband Dale and their children. Next to them were Justin, Sammy and Carlton. Behind them were Chastain and Sicilee. Tanner saw her take them all into her vision then he saw her eyes drop to the two babies on the floor. Her boy, Bark, said, “Mama,” and began to crawl in her direction. Her daughter, Jessie, was too busy trying to eat her fist (baby spit rolling down her arm) to notice Mommy and Daddy coming through the door but Kinsey noticed her and Tanner smiled as big as he’d ever done in his life as Kinsey dropped to her knees and said, “My babies.”

  By the time Bark had crawled to her, Kinsey was a blubbering mess, and then as she picked her baby son up and hugged him she found she was in the middle of a giant hug herself as everyone in the room came to her.

  The more Kinsey smiled and the more she cried the more tears Tanner felt going down his own cheeks.

  A few emotional minutes later Kinsey asked, “Did everybody just fly over here to Bermuda?”

  To which Tanner answered, “They’ve been here all week, Kinsey. I’d never let you be too far from me and the twins. Jessica and Dale said they wanted to be here for you too. I asked your new friends you just made here in Bermuda to come over for this because I know how much they mean to you.” Tanner swept his hand across the room indicating to everyone standing before Kinsey, “These are the people who have waited for you to get better and also those who helped make you well. These are your people, Kinsey. All friends and family.”

  Kinsey stood over her babies, as they slept in the crib, and she said to Tanner who was standing next to her, “I love them so much Tanner. I promise to make up for the time I took from them. I’m a good mother; I just lost myself for a while.”

  “You’re an incredible mother. You had something to overcome and you did it. I’m proud of you.”

  Kinsey put her hand on Tanner’s hand as it rested on the rail of the crib, “How hard was it? Waiting for me to get better?”

  “It was more lonely than anything. I go through my days not only orbiting these children but you also, and I felt like I’d lost my best friend. I was lost sometimes because things would happen and I had no one to share it with or help me with it.”

  “I’ll never leave you like that again.”

  “I know that, but what I think has happened with this is I’ve got an idea for a book that can help other couples that are dealing with bad post-partum depressions.”

  Kinsey’s eyes lit to the thought, “A book? That’s a wonderful idea.”

  Tanner turned to Kinsey and said, “But I have to get your permission for it. You know me; I write from the heart and I’ll have to share some of what happened to you…and me…in the book.”

  Kinsey thought for a moment, “I’m okay with it. I plan on painting this experience as well. Like me, you’re an artist, Tanner, I can’t take that from you.”

  Tanner pulled Kinsey close, hugged her and said, “I knew you’d say that. I’ve been writing it here, late at night and in the early morning when I knew you were safe in your hotel bed.”

  Kinsey took a long look into her husband’s eyes and realized she needed to take care of him. She could see the exhaustion deep in the back of his eyes and she asked, “How much sleep have you been getting Tanner?”

  Tanner looked down to the babies, then away from Kinsey. Finally his eyes came back to hers and he said, “I haven’t slept in six months Kinsey; not more than an hour or two a night. I’ve been really worried about you. Not only that, I have this deep rage within me at that Russian, Dmitri. He tried to date rape my wife and I have to keep praying to God to help me calm the rage that burns in my stomach. If I met Dmitri right now I most likely would commit an act of brutal violence against him. I have to let that go and focus on you and the twins.” Tanner dropped his eyes from Kinsey’s, “Between my worries for you these last months and my anger at Dmitri I don’t know if I’m coming or going.”

  Kinsey knew her husband was about to break down and she also knew the last thing he wanted was to show his vulnerability this soon after working so hard to get her back in his life. On an instinct that came from years of knowing and loving her husband she switched the subject to something that could take the place of his exhaustion, at least for now, but still give her a way to care for him and let him unwind. “I think these two babies are down for the night Tanner. Why don’t you go to our bedroom and take off your shirt. I want to rub lotion on your scars. It’s been a long time since I did that for you and I want to see how they look. I need to make sure that I spend as much time with you as I do these two sleeping darlings.”

  Kinsey looked to the crib and the babies and when Tanner dropped his eyes to their babies, she said, “Come on now.”

  She took him by the hand and led him to their bedroom.

  Kinsey made love to her husband and then rubbed lotion on his scarred, dried-out back. He was asleep by the time she finished rubbing in the lotion and she left him in the bed just as he lay.

  She slept on a small sofa across the room from their bed and when she awoke, early in the morning with the sun just rising, she saw that Tanner had yet to move from the position on his stomach in which he’d fallen asleep. She left him asleep and made it downstairs to her children’s room just as they were waking.

  She gathered them in her arms and put them both on the changing table and changed their diapers. She let Bark play on the floor while she dressed Jessie then she picked up Bark and dressed him quickly before he became too agitated and began to make a fuss. Bark hated to be dressed.

  She took them outside to the back of the house. The view
was breathtaking. The house overlooked the sea from a high hill. Below, down a long trail, was a beach club, pool and restaurant. Beyond the beach, the sea spread out along the horizon as far as the eye could see.

  Kinsey saw Jessica watching her own babies as they played in the Bermuda grass by a picnic table and chairs. She was drinking a cup of coffee.

  “How do, friend? Mind if we come play with you guys?” Kinsey asked.

  Jessica lit up at seeing Kinsey and stood to greet her, saying, “Isn’t this nice? I’ve been waiting to talk to you about painting all week. I have so many places I want to take you. This island makes me want to paint so bad.”

  “Give me a hug, Jess. Let me know I’m still everything to you,” Kinsey placed her wiggling babies on the ground and both began to crawl toward Jessica’s two baby boys, “I was so bad to you and I miss you so much now.”

  Kinsey found herself wrapped in the arms of her crying friend. She cried also and when the tears were all gone they sat down and watched their children play and they talked.

  “Can you tell me about your new friends?” Jessica asked, as she sat down.

  Kinsey nodded, took a seat in a chair next to Jessica and answered, “I met them all over here in Bermuda. Sammy brought me out of my shell and he made me feel good enough about myself to keep healing. It’s hard to get out of bed when you’re depressed but I had no choice with him, I knew he was waiting to do something with me. Justin is like a little brother to me. He needed both me and Sammy. He still does actually, and getting him back with his fiancée is something I mean to do.” “But how can you help him find her? I was talking to Sammy last night and he said she’s probably hiding and working on some island in the Caribbean. There’s a lot of islands down there.”

  “Tanner has an idea and I like it. We tried to call our friend Bill and see if his yacht is close by, but it’s way over in the Mediterranean, in port in Monte Carlo, so we can’t use that, but then Tanner thought to letting Justin use our sailboat, the Naked Sunset, and going island hopping in it. I think Tanner even wants to go with him if Justin can stand to wait a few weeks.”

  “Why would Tanner do that? He just met him.”

  “I think that, like me, Tanner sees in Justin how he and I were those many years ago, searching for each other. He wants to help Justin find his fiancée. Finally learning where Dmitri may have dropped her off notwithstanding, Justin is angry right now. The love of his life was taken from him without any kind of closure. Both Tanner and I get what he’s feeling and we want to help him.” Jessica stooped down to take a stick from the hands of her son before he tried to eat it and then she asked, “And the two girls, Sicilee and Chastain, what about them?”

  Baby Jessie had made her way to Kinsey’s leg and then used it to stand. Kinsey picked her up and placed her in her lap, “They risked everything helping us find out what happened to Trisha and then they helped Sammy find me when Dmitri had drugged me and taken me back into the cabin. Justin, Sammy and I owe them big time and there is no way they could ever go back on that yacht. Dmitri might hurt them, or do something to them that’s even worse; I wouldn’t put anything past him. Sammy and I are looking to find them jobs. Either in Charleston or Hollywood, it’s up to them though where they choose to live.”

  Jessica put her hand over to Kinsey’s and held it, saying, “You are better, Kinsey. You have always put others first in your life. Then you went away from us. But I know you’re back when all you talk about is helping others. It’s good to have my friend back.”

  Kinsey smiled, “Let’s go take some pictures this evening after we put the children to bed. We can get some of the good evening sunlight as it shines across this island.”

  “I can’t wait.” Jessica answered.

  After Jessica and Kinsey had made the babies lunch and fed them Kinsey went upstairs to check on Tanner. He was just starting to wake as she slipped in the door to their bedroom and she went immediately to the lotions and took one and climbed on the bed next to Tanner and began rubbing it on his back as he came to consciousness.

  “This is a great way to wake up,” he said through half closed eyes.

  Kinsey kissed him on the back of the neck. “How do you feel?”

  Tanner went quiet for a moment, then he answered, “I feel like a new man. How long did I sleep?”

  Kinsey didn’t answer, instead she worked on getting the lotion deep into Tanner’s burn scars. After a few minutes she was finished and she said, “You slept about twelve hours. But if that isn’t enough I want you to keep resting.”

  Tanner sat up on the bed, “I feel good Kins. We are in Bermuda. I’m going to make sure we enjoy the next week here. We are a family again and I want to celebrate.”

  Kinsey smiled, “We are a family again.” She stepped from the bed, “Let’s invite everyone down to the beach for the afternoon after the twins wake up. Let’s get Dale and Jessica, their little boys, Sammy, Carlton, everyone, and go drink beer and play with the babies and just… and just be together.”

  “Not wanting to be alone, Kins?”

  Kinsey laughed, “The last person I want to be with is me. I’m tired of me. I want to leave the dark me behind and I want to be with my babies, my husband and my friends.”

  “Then let’s do it. I’m starving.”

  “I bet you are, Tanner. You get ready and I’ll go make you something to eat. See you in the kitchen.” Kinsey made her way to the door and left Tanner to get ready for the beach.

  By early afternoon everyone had made it down from the house to the beach. The surf was up and Tanner, Dale, Carlton and Justin were out trying to tuck themselves inside the liquid barrels as they rolled over the island’s reef and on toward the shore. Kinsey was delighted that Justin and Carlton were surfers, for it gave both them, Tanner and Dale something in common.

  Kinsey and Jessica were using cameras with telephoto lenses to snap photos of the men as they shined glistening and wet in the bright sunlight.

  Every now and then Kins or Jess would turn back to the beach behind them and make sure Sammy was okay taking care of the children. To Kinsey, with the three boys and Jessie all trying to crawl in different directions in the white sand, it looked like he was trying to herd cats and not doing well with it.

  Babies loved Sammy. Kinsey knew children were attracted to kind and gentle adults and Sammy was showing both qualities in excess as the children all spent the morning at the house trying to get him to play with them. He relented when they got to the beach and Kinsey could see by the beaming smile on his face as he ran from one child to the other, trying to contain them, that Sammy had found something besides a woman’s hair that he could lose himself within while finding pure joy in doing it.

  When the four men surfing finally came out of the water later that afternoon, Sam met Carlton, tired and happy as he walked from the water, at the edge of the shore and said, “I want a baby.”

  Kinsey and everyone else laughed as Carlton looked back at Sammy like he was nuts, “What?” he asked right back.

  Sammy reconsidered, then said, “I at least want to be a babysitter or something.”

  “Why don’t you work with babies in an orphanage or a boy or girl’s home? It’s very rewarding.” Jessica said, stepping up next to Sammy.

  Sammy looked at Carlton, like he needed some kind of validation to his new found love, and said, “I could do that. Maybe I can help them play or something.”

  “Children’s homes are always needing help,” Jessica said, “Anything you do for them is much appreciated. I volunteered in one when I was in college and I loved every moment of it.”

  “That’s it. I’ll do it in L.A. I can’t wait,” Sammy said as he noticed Bark, crawling on his hands and knees, making a break for the water, “Oh, dear! Barky, get back from that water this instant.” Sammy ran to the water’s edge and caught Bark by the top of his swimsuit just as he was getting wet.

  Later that afternoon, Kinsey went with Jessica and Sammy to put the babies down f
or a nap. Sam had become interested in everything about raising babies and he stood back and watched as Jess and Kins changed the children from their wet and sandy suits and into something more comfortable for sleeping.

  Bark, Jessie and Jessica’s oldest son, Kenny, were put down in their cribs and asleep in minutes. Jessica’s youngest son, Eric, was fussing and Sammy insisted on trying to rock him to sleep.

  When Jessica and Kinsey came out from the room Dale was walking by outside in the hall.

  “Where you going, honey?” Jessica asked.

  “Change my board shorts. You want to help me?” He gave Kinsey a wink.

  Kinsey knew what the wink was for and laughed.

  Jessica looked at Kinsey who nodded yes then back to Dale, “I can do that. We might be a few minutes, Kinsey, don’t wait up.”

  Kinsey laughed again and made her way through the large house. She stepped onto the porch of the house and looked down to the beach below. She could see Tanner pulling the surfboards up high on the white sand, out of the reach of the waves, and then he made for the beach club restaurant just to his left down the beach.

  To Kinsey he looked like the perfect male. There was something about his body that it seemed to be built to fit hers perfectly. Everything about him matched her tastes and desires in a man. She grabbed her camera from the porch table where she had set it down earlier and headed down the long path to the beach below to meet him.

  She saw Tanner in the open bar. He had a beer in his hand and the orange light of the setting sun was shining on him and the bar around him making the conditions perfect for a photo. He had yet to see her so she stayed out of his line of sight and worked herself into a position where she could take his picture with the bar and the sea in the background as the sunlight lit up his face and the inside of his eyes.