Dirty Little Secrets (Romantic Mystery) Book 1 in the J.J. Graves Series

by Hart, Liliana

  “That’s not true, Jeremy. I’ve known you my whole life. How could I not notice you?” I tasted the coppery tang of blood in my mouth and realized I’d been biting my lip to keep from screaming.

  ”But you didn’t want ME,” he said.

  “How was I to know you felt that way? You were so young. Hell, you’re still young.”

  “I’m a man, dammit. A flesh and blood man,” he screamed.

  “You’re right, Jeremy. I’m sorry,” I said, my self-preservation instincts kicking in. It was never a good idea to antagonize a sociopath.

  “That’s right. Show a little respect,” he said with a smile that sent chills down my spine. “You know, it was because of you I became a cop. Everybody knows how much you love Jack. How could I not want to get close to him to get closer to you? But it didn’t work out that way, so I had to find other ways of getting your attention. A murder here, a murder there. Different places. Different people.”

  He shrugged over the lives he’d destroyed as if they were meaningless. “It was all just practice for this one moment,” he said. “You’ll be my finest work.”

  He inched closer to me, his sweaty palm reaching toward my face but not touching me. I couldn’t help but shrink back with the fear that seized me.

  “Don’t be afraid, Jaye. Not yet,” he said. His damp finger slid down my cheek and bile rose in the back of my throat.

  “Don’t touch me,” I said. The calm I’d managed earlier had deserted me and my voice shook.

  “I apologize,” he said, his smile almost gentle—his eyes crazy. “It seems I owe you more than one apology. The saying is true. The past does always comes back to haunt you. Your parents’ death was very tragic. Devastating for the whole town. Most of all you. It was important for you to be alone, so you could realize that you needed someone to take care of you. But even then, you never saw me.”

  My breath caught in my lungs as I thought about what he’d said. My parents. “You killed my parents?”

  “Of course not,” he said, his Cheshire Cat grin a contradiction to his words. “The Pennsylvania Medical Examiner claimed their deaths were simply an accident. That’s not to say I didn’t help things along by tampering with the car a little bit. And it was just luck that that fool Floyd Parker printed the story about the double suicide and the jealous lover.”

  Jeremy’s crazed eyes turned thoughtful and he giggled. “You know what? It might have been me that gave Floyd the idea in the first place. I don’t remember exactly. All I know is that you packed up from the city and moved back to Bloody Mary. Just like I wanted.”

  I remembered the pain and loneliness after my parent’s death. I remembered the questioning glances of people I’d known my whole life wondering if my parents had really taken their own lives.

  “You know, Brody showing up in Bloody Mary couldn’t have been more perfect,” Jeremy said. “His curiosity made my job easier. Actually, everybody in this town made my job easier. Being a cop who people underestimate has its advantages. I was able to travel all over the county, choosing my prey carefully—watching—waiting. I watched you, Dr. Graves.”

  Sweat glistened at his temples and ran in rivulets down the side of his face. He ran his fingers through his damp hair, causing it to stick up it little spikes. “Aren’t you going to ask me why I picked the victims I did? Why I picked you?

  “Wh. . .Why did you pick them?” I asked, afraid I already knew the answer.

  “I met Fiona Murphy at a private club in D.C. one weekend. You could say it was a special club for people who enjoyed certain things when it came to sex. I’m not afraid to say that it scared the hell out of me when she recognized me.”

  I remembered what kind of things Fiona had enjoyed, and couldn’t imagine the Jeremy Mooney I’d thought I’d known doing those things.

  “It was our little secret,” he continued. “And you could say that Fiona and I had each other by the short hairs. Everyone in town thought George was an abusive husband, but I knew that it was Fiona who liked the abuse. She told me how she was planning to leave him because he wasn’t as harsh as he used to be. He was getting soft. And this idea started to form in my head.” He looked at me and smiled again.

  I was trying to listen to what he was saying and think at the same time, but I wasn’t having much luck.

  “Anyway, I began seeing Fiona pretty regularly.”

  “You were the one she was going to run off with?”

  “Yeah, she played right into my hands. I already knew about George, and what kind of person he was, so the scene wasn’t difficult to stage. It just took patience and timing. Fiona had a secret that no one in town knew about except for me and her husband—to an extent—but even he didn’t know what she really liked. She was an interesting woman. It was pretty slick police work by Jack to find the house in Nottingham. I tried to delay the results as long as possible, but Colburn was looking over my shoulder the whole damned time, afraid I was too stupid to understand the information I had.”

  I knew the only chance for survival I had was to keep him talking. Since he’d put the gun away I was slowly putting distance between us inching my way towards the door. Surely Jack or someone would check on me at some point. Amanda Wallace still needed to be transferred to the other funeral home. Maybe Harvey Wallace, beating down my door in anger, would be the one to save me.

  “What about Amanda Wallace?” I asked.

  “That’s an easy one. It didn’t take very much digging to find out she was having an affair.”

  “But she was pregnant!” I shouted, anger finally starting to replace the fear.

  “I know,” he said. “That was her secret. I almost left her alone when I realized half the town already knew she was having an affair, but then I followed her to her doctor’s appointment. She drove all the way to Caroline County to see her doctor just so she wouldn’t run into anyone she knew. She thought her secret was safe.

  “She met with her lover several times a week, and when I followed her to the hotel I knew the time was right. I went up one of the fire escapes and avoided the cameras. I had photographs of her and Colburn, and I threatened to send them to her husband. I told her I’d find a way to let him know about the baby. She let me right in the door, offering me anything I wanted to keep quiet. She really wasn’t as satisfying as I thought she’d be. She didn’t struggle nearly as much as Fiona did. Fiona had a lot more fight in her.”

  “How did you find out about their connection with Dr. Hides?”

  “Actually, both of them seeing him was just a coincidence, but once I started seeing Fiona I worried that she’d tell him about me. And it turns out I was right to be worried, which is why I took the file. Dr. Hides held the secrets to a lot of people’s lives in that locked cabinet of his. I took Amanda Wallace’s file because I wanted you to be surprised about the baby. Surprises are good. Don’t you think, Dr. Graves?”

  “I think you’re bonkers. You’ve killed god knows how many people for years just because you had some pathetic, school boy crush on me and wanted me to notice you. Well, I have news for you. I would have never noticed you that way. I’m only interested in men.”

  I expected the crack of his hand across my cheek and braced for it, but that didn’t make the pain any less. He’d been right when he’d said he was stronger than he looked. My head whipped to the side and blood filled my mouth.

  Jeremy took a few deep breaths until the rage left his face. “Naughty, naughty, Jaye. You’re not going to make me angry by taunting me. You should know by now that I have exquisite control.” He moved closer to me, and I automatically backed up, but the wall loomed closer behind me. I was out of room.

  “And of course Dr. Hides was a liability because he knew all about me, so he had to go. Did you know he was blackmailing Fiona? For a little over a million dollars and her services for free just to keep her secret. He wasn’t able to get as much from Amanda Wallace, but he was blackmailing her too. That put an interesting twist to things, I think. I
know you and Jack thought that it was him all along. I was watching you when you found him. I laughed my ass off at the expression on your face. I’ve watched you a lot, Dr. Graves. Bet you didn’t know that.”

  “No, I didn’t.” When the phone rang, I think it surprised both of us. We stared at each other to see who was going to make the first move.

  “I think we’ll just let it ring. If I had to guess I would say that’s Jack. That woman from the boutique got a good look at me when I was with Fiona. Who knew? Nosy bitch. I would’ve had to take care of her eventually, but I would’ve made it look like an accident. Jack’s probably just now gotten a description of me from the woman, but he won’t make it all the way from Nottingham in time to save you. He does so want to be your hero.” Jeremy sighed dramatically. “Ahh, young love. Of course, I’ll have to kill him too because he’s found out my secret.”

  The phone stopped ringing, and I wanted to shout in frustration and beg for my life all at the same time.

  “Now I think it’s important that we talk about your secret, Dr. Graves. You’re a fascinating creature. It’s really no wonder that I wanted you.” His smile was admiring and sinister both at the same time. “I wonder what the people of Bloody Mary would say if they found out you’d killed a man,” he said.

  Up until he’d said it out loud I’d thought he’d been bluffing about knowing my darkest secret. It wasn’t one I’d want anyone to find out, even if I wasn’t around to know they were talking about it.

  “You know the evidence against me was inconclusive,” I said calmly. “That’s why it was in a sealed file, and I was able to keep my job at the hospital.”

  “Just because they couldn’t prove you did it doesn’t mean they don’t know you did. Dr. Givens would have loved to see you rot in jail. Did you tell yourself it was a mercy killing? To end that man’s life because he was suffering and begging at the end? Did you cry for him?” He asked. “Did you?” he demanded.

  “Yes. Yes, I cried for him,” I screamed. I was crying now, wishing for things that couldn’t be and a life I’d never really lived. “But I would do it again because he thanked me as he went to sleep that final time. He was finally at peace after so many months of unbearable pain. He was my friend.”

  “Do you kill all your friends? Is that why you have so few?”

  “No, but I wouldn’t mind killing you right now.”

  “Tsk, tsk. Don’t forget your Hippocratic Oath. Again,” he said. “I’m afraid we’re going to have to hurry this along. I’d like for you to be good and dead when Jack gets here, so it has more of an impact. He loves you. Did you know that? I’m a trained observer. He’s loved you for years, but you’re oblivious to anyone’s feelings but your own as usual.”

  “Jack’s never been interested in me that way. We’re just friends.”

  “Don’t kid yourself, sweetheart. Just because he would screw any woman in the state of Virginia doesn’t mean he doesn’t want you. But he’ll keep screwing those other women because he knows if it’s ever you he’s with it’s going to matter and those tom cat days will be over. It’s a shame neither one of you will get to figure it out. Now,” he said all business. “How should we do this?”

  “How about you leave and get a head start, because Jack is going to tear you apart when he finds you.”

  “It’s good to see you can keep your sense of humor at a time like this. You could at least make this interesting. I’ll even give you a handicap.”

  I stood there looking at him, not sure what he wanted me to do.

  “Run, dammit!” he said, slapping me again across the same cheek as he had the last time. I didn’t take time to feel the pain. I just ran. I sprinted out of the study to the front of the house. All I needed was to reach the door.

  I heard his footsteps behind me and knew I’d never make it. He took me down with a tackle around my knees, and I wrenched my shoulder as I hit the floor. The faces of Fiona Murphy and Amanda Wallace went through my mind, frozen forever in death, and I remembered what he’d done to them.

  I screamed—guttural, animal sounds produced from true fear—and fought with everything I had left inside me. My nails clawed the side of his face and my knee desperately tried to find a clear shot to the groin, but he was strong. He rapped my head hard against the floor and addled my senses long enough to pin me down so I couldn’t move at all. My left eye was almost completely swollen shut, but the other one widened in horror as he pressed his full weight against me.

  He laughed close to my face so spittle reigned down and covered my blood soak skin. “Don’t worry, Dr. Graves. There’s just not enough time for what you’re thinking. Dirty girl. Though you have no idea how often I’ve thought of the two of us together that way.”

  I reduced myself to begging when I saw the void he’d spoken of enter his eyes. He put his hands around my neck and began to squeeze. My air was cut off immediately and my lungs burned. Dark spots danced across my vision, and my legs jerked in reflex. My attempts to remove his hands were easily dodged and only made him squeeze harder.

  I knew it was over for me—would have known it even without seeing the look of triumph on his face. But I had one final moment of satisfaction before I died—when I heard the sound of Jack’s voice and saw the red splatter of blood across Jeremy’s chest and neck. The warmth of his blood on my face was the last thing I felt before darkness claimed me.

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  It was the irritating beeps that rang frantically in my ears that told me I wasn’t dead. Or wasn’t dead anymore, at least. I’d been there, seen what the other side had to offer before life was so cruelly forced back into my body. At least There I’d been at peace, with no pain. Here there was unspeakable pain. Brody was gone. And the anguish from that memory was worse than any ache in my body. But somehow I was still here. Was it my fault Brody was dead? Because I hadn’t trusted him enough? Because I hadn’t let myself love him enough? Those weren’t questions I was ready to answer just yet.

  It was Jack’s voice I finally heard that made the beeps slow back down to an easy rhythm. It was his hand holding mine and his voice that was choked with emotion.

  “You gave me a scare, Jaye. I thought you weren’t going to make it,” he said.

  I opened one eye slowly, but things were still fuzzy. And I knew before I tried that speaking would be pointless. Jack’s eyes were bloodshot and his smile strained. Several days of beard growth on his face made me wonder how long I’d been in the hospital.

  “You’re not going to be able to speak for quite some time,” he said. “He crushed your windpipe, and there was some hemorrhaging along the brain. So no singing or autopsies for you any time soon. Maybe all that time they spent on you in surgery will help that tone-deaf problem you have.”

  I smiled as best I could and squeezed his hand just because it felt good to be alive, even if there was unspeakable pain and a long road ahead of me. The morphine started to work, and I slowly went back under. The last thing I heard him say was enough to let me rest in peace.

  “I got him for you, Jaye. I got the bastard who did this to you. You can rest easy now, and I’ll be right here when you wake up. I’m going to be here from now on.”

  The End

  Please enjoy this excerpt of A DIRTY SHAME, book 2 in the JJ Graves series! It comes out on October 30, 2012!

  Chapter One

  There was something about the dark.

  The way it surrounded completely—a gentle embrace that comforted with a soft sigh and a delicate touch. The way it could intimidate and threaten, so the blackness was almost debilitating.

  The dark wielded power.

  But to me, the darkness was a place to hide—a place to bury my face when it was covered with tears, and a place to huddle protectively when the nightmares came lurking. And they always lurked. The darkness was a place to escape when life invariably turned to shit.

  My name is J.J. Graves, and the darkness had become my friend over the past months. So it seeme
d fitting that I wait until that blackest time of the night to slink my way back home—to the place that had left a bitter taste in my mouth and sweat coating the palms of my hands. To sneak back into the town that had raised me and gossiped about me with equal fervor.

  I jerked at the wheel of the old Suburban and pulled to the side of the road on the outskirts of Bloody Mary, Virginia. I lowered my head to the steering wheel and took a few desperate breaths that did nothing to relieve the tightness in my chest. The windows steamed slightly and the sound of harsh breathing echoed in my ears. I tried to ignore the pounding inside my skull and the way the heater couldn’t quite chase away the chills that wracked my body, but it was no use.

  “Come on, Jaye. You can do this.”

  My voice was still hoarse and low, though the pain had been gone for several weeks. The doctors said to be patient. That things would return to normal the more I let myself heal. But I wondered how anything would ever be normal again when all I could think about was the blood that had coated the floors of my childhood home—violent splatters that gleamed like the black center of a Burmese ruby as death tried to claim me. I still heard the deafening sound of the gunshot and felt the blood that rained down on my skin like scalding tears in my dreams. It was easy to forget how hot fresh blood was. It was always cold by the time I had my hands in a body on my table.

  Jeremy Mooney had taken something from me that day, when he’d had his hands wrapped around my throat. I couldn’t say exactly what it was he’d taken. I only knew I was different now. I’d watched him murder a man I’d been intimate with—a man I’d told myself I could love if I only allowed it. Guilt and self-loathing ate at me because I hadn’t known if I could really be in love with Brody, while feelings I couldn’t put into words were forming for Jack—the man I’d called my best friend. The guilt still ate at me. And I’d been avoiding Jack because of it.