“Kali,” he muttered, feeling that hardness in his light worsen.
“You know she will tell them things,” Menlim said, his voice more gentle that time. “Things that could harm us. Things that could harm you, my brother...”
Terian did know that. He knew that cunt, all too well.
He owed her some things. Promises were made. Vows, even.
Vows she was long overdue to collect.
“You remember what I told you, Terian?” Menlim said, his voice softer that time, more gentle.
“You said you would give her to me,” Terian said, feeling that heat spread through his limbs, temporarily blotting everything else out. “You said I could have her, when this was done.”
“I did,” Menlim said, inclining his head. “I vowed it, brother. I vow it still...with every element in my light. With the light of my own son, I vow it...”
Revi’. He meant Revi’.
Thinking about this, about Revi’ and that bitch who took him away...
Terian felt pain course harder through his light, giving him an erection.
“Bring them to Dubai, beloved brother,” Menlim said, softer. “There is still some chance they will turn away from this. Bring them to Dubai...and then bring them to me.”
Terian nodded, feeling that pain worsen, heating knots in his belly and chest.
It had been so long. So long since he’d seen his brother...since he laughed with him, been with him in any way. So many things had happened since then. So many changes...
So many things had been broken and lost.
He needed him. They needed each other.
“They will come,” Terian said, his voice firm that time. He looked up at the aged seer, his voice holding certainty time, and a strength that had been absent from his words before. “They will come, brother,” he said, echoing that same density of truth. “I will make sure of it. And I will find them, before they can leave with what they want.”
Menlim nodded, his expression unmoving.
Terian felt some flicker of approval there, but wariness, too. Not quite skepticism, in the sense that he thought Terian was lying, or keeping more secrets, or even afraid. More like the old seer wanted something more concrete. He wanted more than vague assurances and placations, something that wouldn’t simply make his wantings sound more likely.
He wanted certainty.
Absolute certainty. Without a doubt certainty.
No waggy, smiley dogs. No pretend nicenesses. No speeches with swelling music and pounding cannons. No emotional catharsis and tearing eyes...
Mathematical certainties.
Perceptual shifts based on hard data and reliable equations...
“How do you plan to do that?” Menlim said, even as Terian thought these things, chasing them like rabbits in the deeper recesses of his mind. “What do you intend, my brother?”
Terian did know, though.
He knew exactly what he would do.
He knew Revi’, after all. He knew what Revi’ cared about...what motivated him. Even that prescient bitch with her lying words and whispering lies wouldn’t get in Revi’s way, not if Terian went after what his old friend really cared about.
Anyway, he knew something else.
He knew what the little bird would do.
He wished his sister, Alyson no harm...he loved her, too, so very, very much...almost as much as he loved Revi’ himself.
She was his Bridge...his precious Bridge...
Feeling a coil of colder anger off the old seer’s light, Terian suppressed that thought, too.
Daddy didn’t like sister Alyson. He didn’t like her one bit.
“You know she cannot be allowed to survive?” Menlim said, his voice dangerous that time. “We are clear on that, Terian? Because we have discussed this before, too.”
Terian frowned, but he nodded.
That pain in his chest worsened, but he nodded again.
He did know. He knew.
He knew lots of things...
“You mustn’t let yourself get confused, my wise brother,” Menlim said, softer. “I understand that your light feeds you more information than most. I also understand what family means to you. Truly. It is important to me, as well...more than you can possibly know. But you mustn’t let these things confuse you, beloved Prophet. Betrayals cannot be tolerated, my brother. Disloyalty and selfish agendas are the rot that eats civilization from its roots. There must always be that core of loyalty and sacrifice for the greater good that runs through us all...”
Terian continued to frown, thinking about this.
Menlim knew things, too. The father. He knew everything.
He knew more than Galaith.
Terian couldn’t hide things from the father. He knew he shouldn’t. He’d be a bad man, too, if he did. Like Revi’. Like sister Alyson.
The thought created a panic through Terian’s light, a momentary tilt that pulled him off his axis, leaving him walking in some other place...leaving powdered footsteps on the moon. He could see everything from up there. Everything.
Uncle-father-daddy...he was right.
He could see too much.
He could see his sister and brother, even, in that other place. They were struggling now. Power and love, light and truth. They looked for that truth inside their own minds, inside one another’s bodies...inside their skins and lights. They looked for it in Lily, in their friends, in their love for other people. They felt responsible.
They felt responsible for protecting their people, creating a future...
Pain whispered through Terian’s light.
He was all alone here. All alone.
Father was right.
He was lonely here. He needed his family.
Terian looked out the window, at the sun glimmering off the ocean, at the sand he could imagine he saw, swirling in eddies on the beaches across space and time.
He knew what she would do...Sister Alyson. Bridge. Light between worlds. Destroyer of the way things had been. Bringer of truth. Half-awakened prophet of her own.
It wouldn’t be long now.
He knew that once she’d done it, he would have access to Revi’s light again. Real access. The kind of access that could change things between them all. The kind of access that could really fuck shit up...Terian thought to himself, smiling as he sat among those swirling dunes.
Alyson would hand him the keys to the kingdom...the magic keys.
The keys to Revi’s light.
It would happen soon now, too, he knew.
Very soon.
Very, very soon.
21
NEW EYES
WHEN I WOKE up next, my wrist was chained to the wall.
I looked at it, surprised, but too tired to care that much, really.
I noted Revik was no longer there, in the room with me. It didn’t feel like he’d been gone very long. I knew he’d have to be back before the clock ran down on him again...but some part of me hurt as I felt for him with my light and couldn’t find him.
I wondered where he was, and who he might be with.
Thankfully, that didn’t last long, either.
After tugging on my arm a few times to test the chain, I closed my eyes, briefly thankful I didn’t have to go to the bathroom. I noted the next time I blinked that Revik left me water in a container on the low table next to my side of the bed, along with a note I didn’t bother to read, since I knew he’d be back and that I didn’t need to know where he was until then.
I didn’t want to find out later if it had been a lie.
Pushing everything from my mind, I snuggled deeper into the covers that Revik must have pulled up around me at some point, since we’d lain on top of the comforter the last time I’d been conscious enough to know where I was.
The last thing I did was sigh...feeling myself breathe, my heart beat.
Somewhere in that, I slid back into unconsciousness.
THE NEXT TIME I opened my eyes, Revik was unlocking my wrist from
the wall.
I felt what might have been a flicker of discomfort on him. More than that, though, I felt a harder kind of determination, maybe even defiance.
Whatever it was that I felt, he didn’t meet my gaze as he opened the organic metal band. Once he had it undone, he reconfigured the wall to get the chain to retract, still avoiding my eyes. It occurred to me only then, in watching his face, that he hadn’t locked me up as some kind of erotic thing that time.
He’d actually done it so I wouldn’t leave.
I was still looking up at him, when something else crossed my mind.
I’d missed his birthday.
His birthday had been the day after we met Kali on that beach.
I’d planned things for him, too, just like I had the year before, when I missed his birthday when I got kidnapped by Cass. This time, we were going to have a party, up on the deck. Maygar was going to help me cook something for him. We’d joked about making him a curry-flavored cake...with bourbon in the batter. I had other presents for him, too.
I’d made a painting for him. I’d been working on it for weeks, mostly when he was locked up in here.
Reaching up, I touched his face.
His jaw hardened as I traced it with my fingertips, right before he turned, studying my face almost as closely as I studied his, but still without fully meeting my gaze. I saw tiredness in his expression, but also lingering nerves, what still verged on fear.
“Forget it,” he said, giving me a taut smile. “We’ll do it next year.”
I clicked at him reproachfully, but he cut me off before I could speak.
“...We’re still a few days away from the staging area,” he said, his voice gruff.
Still watching his face, I nodded, knowing what he meant.
He was talking about Dubai.
“Do they need me up there today?” I said.
There was a silence. Then he shook his head, once.
“Not unless you want to be,” he said.
Exhaling, I relaxed my muscles, lying fully back on the bed. I winced a little at my sore rear end, rubbing my wrist with the fingers of my other hand. My wrist didn’t really hurt, though, not like other parts of my body, and even those, I didn’t really mind.
“No,” I said, wincing again as I adjusted my body. “Not in the slightest.”
He looked at me directly that time.
“Good,” he said then, blunt.
From the way he said it, and the clicking sound he made under his breath after he spoke, I could tell he meant it. His anger still didn’t feel aimed at me, however. If anything, the feeling he aimed at me continued to verge more on caution. He looked at me almost like he didn’t know me, or maybe like he wasn’t sure whether he knew me or not...or maybe like he wasn’t sure which version of me he would be getting after last night.
“What about you?” I said, still studying his light.
He shook his head again.
“No,” he said only.
I could tell there was more to that answer, too, both from his light and from the slight hesitation after he said it. When he avoided my eyes again, though, I decided to drop it. At least for the moment.
I smelled coffee then, and food.
As soon as that much reached my awareness, my stomach made urgent little gurgling sounds. I looked past him, to the tray he’d left on the desk.
“Is that for me?” I said, smiling.
“Mostly,” he said.
I nodded, still looking over the contents of the tray, even as I felt him take the opportunity to look at me. I saw a bowl of what looked like blueberries. Next to that, a smaller bowl of what had to be yogurt...probably made of goat milk, considering how many of those we had on board. As far as I knew, we still had only one cow, a chubby black Holstein everyone called “Bessie,” originally as a joke but the name kind of stuck.
A small pitcher of milk or cream sat next to a tall, dark carafe of what I hoped was coffee. I knew the cream was also probably from a goat, but I didn’t mind that, either, since I was pretty used to it by now. Toast sat on a plate next to that, along with eggs and what looked like bacon but was probably some kind of substitute, given the rarity of real meat on board the ship. I even saw a glass of orange juice, probably left over from the frozen stuff we had.
“Wow,” I said, propping my upper body on my elbows. “You went all out.”
He moved closer to me on the bed, his expression still unmoving. I watched his face, still feeling strangely cautious with him as he leaned closer, sliding a hand into my hair. He didn’t move from the bed for a few seconds as he caressed it back from my face, sliding his fingers deeper into it behind my head and massaging the back of my skull.
“Do you feel okay?” he said, his voice gruff again.
I nodded, looking up as he touched my face with his other hand. I felt his light merging into mine, the longer he sat there, almost like he couldn’t help himself. When I didn’t keep him out, he sighed again, and I felt that relief in his light grow more intense again.
He got up a few seconds later, but only long enough to pick up the tray and bring it back over to the bed. Once he stood over me, he motioned with his fingers for me to move back, to give him space to put it down, then waited for me while I complied. Once I’d scootched back far enough, he set the tray right on the mattress, on the side nearest to the night table. Then he climbed over it and me, to lay behind me so he wouldn’t be between me and the food.
Or more to the point, between me and the coffee.
He grunted a little. I heard the humor in it that time.
I was already pouring coffee into one of the ceramic mugs as he settled his weight behind me. He slid under the covers as I poured cream then added honey, which I hadn’t even seen in its small, glass jar behind the cream. Once he was under the comforter and sheets, he wrapped his arms around me, coiling a hand back into my hair from behind and caressing it away from my face and neck. He pressed against me as I popped a few blueberries into my mouth, and I felt him sigh again, that relief more prominent in his light.
He just lay there, coiled around me, his face resting on my spine and the back of my neck while I ate. I found it pretty distracting, I admit, especially when he started kissing me, using light in his tongue and lips, pausing every few seconds to press his face against my skin. When he still didn’t say anything, I focused back on the tray, going up on one elbow so I could pour a refill of coffee and then munching on a piece of what tasted like turkey bacon.
He wrapped his arm around me tighter, crosswise that time.
He pressed his whole body against me and I felt him, hard against the back of my thighs. Pain seethed off his light even as I noticed, catching my breath, but also bringing a rush of affection. I leaned back against him, and felt another pulse of pain leave his light.
“So are you going to tell me?” I said, tilting my head back to look at him.
I only caught a bare glimpse of his face, just because the angle was weird.
“Tell you what?” he said. His fingers were massaging my back again.
“The damage,” I said, taking another sip of the coffee. I nearly sighed in ecstasy at the taste. Between that and the backrub, I was feeling pretty much in heaven about then. He’d brought me real espresso mixed with water, and he’d made it damned strong, the way he knew I liked it. I gestured vaguely with a hand, taking another long sip. “...You know,” I said, putting down the mug carefully, so I wouldn’t spill a drop. “...Whatever pieces I have to pick up from all this. With the planning of Dubai. With Balidor and Kali and...I don’t know, whoever.”
He let out a low grunt, gripping me tighter.
“None,” he said.
I looked back at him for real that time, meeting his gaze. “Meaning what?”
“You might need to apologize to Jon,” he said, quieter.
I winced, and he held me tighter.
“It’s all right, Allie. I shouldn’t have said that.”
He didn’t let
go of me, but shifted his weight slightly, so he lay more on his back. I noticed that his black hair was getting longer again, even as he shoved a lock of it behind one ear.
“I took care of the rest of it,” he said.
When I only looked at him, he shook his head, clicking at me softly.
“Don’t worry about it,” he said. His fingers tightened on my back again, even as he began massaging the muscles there again slowly. “I mean it...and don’t worry about Jon. He’s not mad at you. He’s mad at me. A lot of people are.” Swallowing, he tilted his head in a shrug. “I covered you in the planning meetings. I made them wait on anything where I thought you might have an opinion. They’re working on multiple scenarios right now. You’ll have something to work with before we get to the staging...I told them to leave you alone until then.”
He paused, and another pulse of pain left his light. Shaking his head, he pulled me closer, wrapping his arms tighter around my body.
“Allie, do we have to talk about this right now?” he said.
I shook my head, lowering the mug again after another sip of coffee.
“No,” I said. “Is Lily okay?”
He gripped me closer, his mouth firming against my neck.
“Not really, no,” he said, his voice quiet once more, but softer. “She knew something was wrong. You should go see her. Soon, I mean.”
I felt my mouth tighten as I thought about his words. When I felt him waiting for me to acknowledge them in some way, I nodded, exhaling.
“Okay.” I looked back at the tray, and realized I was pretty full already, even as I took another few blueberries out of the bowl, popping those into my mouth, too. Chewing, I glanced back at him again.
“Do you want to come with me?” I said. “Or should I go alone?”
“I want to come,” he said.
When I started to slide off the bed, moving carefully so I wouldn’t tip the tray off the side, he caught hold of my arm, pulling me back down.
“I didn’t mean right now, Allie,” he said.
Allie's War Season Four Page 105