Agatha Parrot and the Heart of Mud
Page 5
“It would help me,” said Martha. “Even if she just fills the gap where Danny was.”
So Bella borrowed Danny’s jersey and pulled it on over her top. “You stay at the back with Martha,” said James. “If the ball comes near you, don’t try anything clever. Just try to kick it to one of us.”
When the yellows saw great big Martha walking back into position with the little person running alongside her, they all burst out laughing.
“Ignore them,” said Martha. “They’re only boys.”
Motley blew his whistle, and the game started again.
Tinky tonk
Tiddly plop
Tick tock
Went the clock . . .
But then suddenly something exciting happened! The ball landed by Martha. Two yellows came charging over, so Martha ran off, keeping the ball close to her feet. The yellows chased after her, but when they realized she was too big and too quick for them, they threw themselves forward and grabbed onto her jersey. Martha kept going and pulled them both along. Her shirt was stretching and stretching . . . and then a loud voice drowned out everything else on the field—
“HEY, YOU TWO!” screamed Martha’s mom. “GET YOUR HANDS OFF THAT NEW SHIRT!”
But they didn’t let go, and Martha didn’t stop running. Martha’s mom put two fingers in her mouth and made a huge loud whistle noise. Everybody stopped and looked at Martha’s mom.
“IF YOU TWO DON’T LET GO, I’M BENCHING YOU!” she shouted.
Motley came running over.
“Did you whistle?” he demanded. “You’re not allowed to whistle. I’m in charge.”
“Oh, are you?” said Martha’s mom. “Then, if that jersey gets ripped, you’ll be the one mending it!”
“I warn you, madam!” said Motley. “Any more talk like that and I’ll pack the goals away.”
Now everyone was staring at Motley and starting to laugh. In the meantime, the ball had rolled away and was sitting on its own in the middle of the field. I ran down the sideline to get close to where Bella was standing.
“The referee hasn’t blown his whistle,” I told her. “So the game’s still going!”
Bella ran off like a bullet—WHIZZ!
She’d gotten the ball halfway to the goal before the yellows realized what was happening. Everyone suddenly charged after her, but she was miles ahead.
“Pass it!” shouted James, trying to catch up. “Pass it to me!”
Bella completely ignored him.
There was only the yellow goalkeeper in front of her. He saw her coming and came out to dive on the ball, but Bella was moving so fast that he missed. She just ran straight into the goal with the ball rolling along in front of her.
WAHOO, GO, BELLA!
BIG HUGS AND HIGH-FIVES!
The Ending
It was late by the time we got home, so Auntie Zoe and Bella had to get going quickly.
We were all standing out by the car. Bella was ready to go, but Auntie Zoe is an auntie. The rules for aunties state that you can’t leave until you’ve given everybody a big hug.
First she hugged James, which was funny because he got a lipsticky mark on his cheek. Even if your auntie is Auntie Zoe, a lip sticky mark from your auntie is NOT COOL—ha ha, love it, love it!
All the time she was hugging James, Dad was stroking his head so he was all ready for his big hug. Ha ha! Nice try, Dad. He did get a very big hug but NO lipstick. Aw, poor Dad! Boo hoo hoo.
Normally Tilly runs and hides from things like auntie hugs, but for Auntie Zoe she’d climbed onto the fence, so she was all ready for it.
I got the best hug, because Auntie Zoe whispered to me that she was doing a fitness DVD and maybe maybe MAYBE I could be in it! Wahoo, I might be famous. Pass the champagne, darling—slurp, burp, WHEEEEE!
And then Auntie Zoe gave Mom a hug, and they both started crying.
But all this hugging wasn’t the most exciting thing happening on Odd Street that night! Just as they were driving off, I saw Bella give James a shy little wave through the car window . . . and James gave a little wave back! Crazy times.
So we all went inside, and Mom took me and Tilly upstairs to get sorted out for bedtime and school tomorrow and putting socks and pants in the wash and all that stuff. I was just coming down to get a glass of water when I heard James’s voice in the living room talking to Dad.
“You know Cousin Bella?” said James. “I just remembered, she sent me an email. Do you think it’s too late to send a reply?”
It was WAY too late, James!
“Er . . . that depends,” said Dad. “What did you want to say?”
“Nothing much,” said James. “Just being nice and friendly.”
Now, this is VERY private. I don’t want you laughing at James. He might be a boy and horrible and all that, but sometimes he does things right. You can only read this if you promise not to laugh or tell anybody.
Promise?
Okay, here it is:
Hi, Bella,
Thanks for being on our team. It was a really good goal.
Matt says that I have to ask if you’ll come and play for us again. I hope so.
Good luck with stuff.
Love from James
Gosh, how exciting! I know what you’re thinking.
Will James and Bella ever meet again?
Will they get married?
Will they go and live in a little cottage by the seaside?
Will he go bald?
Will they have 10000000 kids?
Will they all look like James—even the girls?
URGH!
What a horrible thought to end the story with, but don’t worry! I promised Bianca I’d put her zebra facts at the back of the book, so at least that’ll take your mind off it and leave you with nice thoughts, ha ha!
But right now, you have a choice. Since the story is over, you can EITHER have the normal ending like this . . .
THE END.
. . . OR if you think that’s just a little boring, you can go for the mega-crazy BELLA sort of ending. It’s on the next page. So are you ready?
Take a deep breath, and here we go . . .
THANK YOU my DARLING READER for reading my little story!
OODLES and DOODLES of LOVE and HUGS to YOU forever and ever and EVER.
See you sooooooon!
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
XXXXXXXXXXXXX. . . . pause for breath . . . XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
(I think all books should end like that, especially schoolbooks—ha ha, awesome!)
Bianca’s Facts About Zebras
Bianca told me about a million zebra facts, so these are just a few of them, and I put in a WRONG fact for fun!
Can you guess which one I made up?
There are three different types of zebras, and they all live in Africa. There are mountain zebras (the smallest), grassland zebras (the mediumest), and extra-stripey zebras (the biggest).
Every zebra has a different pattern of stripes.
Zebras are black with white stripes, NOT white with black stripes.
You can tell a zebra’s mood by its ears. (Warning! Ears backwards = bad mood.)
Zebras won’t let anybody ride them. So if you see somebody on a zebra, then it’s probably really a horse wearing pajamas.
Zebras sleep on their backs with their feet sticking up.
Baby zebras can run when they are one hour old.
Polar bears can make themselves look a little like zebras! That’s because polar bears have black skin under their white fur. So if a polar bear borrows Dad’s razor and shaves some lines of fur off—TA-DA!—it’s got an instant zebra costume! They could probably look like pandas, too, if they wanted.
So which fact is made up?
Answer: Number 6 is completely made up because zebras sleep standing up. By the way, number 8 could be true! If anybody says they’ve never seen a polar bear wit
h stripes shaved in its fur, you can say maybe they HAVE but they thought it was a fat zebra. It’s an easy mistake to make.
Visit www.hmhco.com or your favorite retailer to order the book.
MiddleGradeMania.com
About the Author
KJARTAN POSKITT lives in Yorkshire, England, just down the street from the real Odd Street School! The author of many children’s books, Kjartan is also a children’s television presenter and musician.
Learn more at www.kjartan.co.uk
About the Illustrator
WES HARGIS is the New York Times best-selling illustrator of several picture books, including When I Grow Up by Al Yankovic. He lives in Safford, Arizona.
Learn more at www.weshargis.com