Risk of Harm

by Lucie Whitehouse

  He’d felt the shift in tenor, but misinterpreted it. ‘You all right?’ he said. ‘Is it Samir?’

  ‘Samir?’ She’d pulled back, looked at him. ‘What? It’s been fifteen years – eighteen.’ She’d caught him by the belt and tugged him in. ‘Get over here.’

  And yet it was as if by saying his name, Kev had summoned Samir, not the one whom they’d seen that night but the eighteen-year-old whose clothes had lain on his bedroom floor in a tangled heap with hers on those sixth-form afternoons, the one she’d shared beds and sleeping-bags with in any number of campsites and hostels across Europe and southern Africa. The idea that she would ever have done this then, slept with one of their friends … But that time was gone – long gone – and this was now. Kev was a divorcé and she was a single mother, neither of them had anyone else. If they wanted to be friends with benefits, who was it hurting?

  Chapter Nine

  Day Three was her first thought when she woke up. From here, the enquiry would get substantially harder. Witnesses’ memories would blur, and the team would start to grow frustrated and tired. The public outrage would continue for a few more days and then, failing progress, their girl would fade from view. It was human nature, the lure of the shiny new object, the disillusionment when things proved difficult. Within a week, two, if they were lucky, there’d be another murder in the city, another story for people to get angry about, and their girl would slide into oblivion. Robin thought of Martin Engel, the monumental work it must have taken to keep Victoria alive in people’s minds as long as he had. The list of the forgotten was infinitely longer.

  She looked at the clock – 5.53 – and then at Kev’s head on the other pillow, the dark hair tapering at the base of his skull. He was asleep, of course, like anyone sensible would be at this hour, his ribcage gently rising and falling. She was reluctant to wake him – before six; it seemed inhospitable – but would it be weird to slip out and leave him sleeping? No, he’d be all right with it, surely; he’d understand. And he knew his way around the house, knew where the coffee was if he wanted one before he went.

  She wondered if she should put the sheets in the machine before she went to work, though. Enjoyable as they were, these get-togethers, she didn’t need Lennie to know about them, and she was like a sniffer dog, always had been. ‘Have you been to the pub, Mum? Who was smoking?’ Once she’d come home after attending a scene with a body stashed in an airing cupboard and Len had physically recoiled. And she’d commented on Kev’s aftershave before. Not, of course, that that put her in any kind of minority.

  Her phone rang on the bedside table and she grabbed it. At this hour, it could only be work – had the duty team got something? But the screen said Natalie. Why the hell would Natalie be calling?

  ‘Robin?’ She sounded breathless. ‘Have you heard from Luke?’

  ‘No. Should I have?’ He hadn’t rung her in twenty years.

  ‘You’ve got to help me.’ Panic now, unmistakable.

  ‘What’s going on? Is it Mum and Dad?’

  ‘No! He’s gone nuts.’

  ‘What – who has?’

  ‘Luke! We had a row. Last night. I lost my cool and told him I wanted a trial separation and he … went mental.’

  Robin was momentarily lost for words. Separation – them? They’d been together since they were sixteen, they were fused at a molecular level. ‘What do you mean “went mental”? Are you all right? Is he there?’

  ‘No. He stormed out twenty minutes ago.’

  She felt a surge of frustration. Bloody Luke, months from his fortieth but still behaving like a toddler denied the big Lego. ‘Look,’ she said, ‘don’t worry about it. You know what he’s like. You said something you didn’t mean in the heat of the moment and he’s flounced off to make you feel bad – Luke classic.’

  ‘No, you don’t understand – he’s off his face! He’s been up all night drinking, he’s had at least half a bottle of Jack Daniels, and he’s taken the car – he’s driving.’

  Shit. And that explained why Natalie had called her.

  She pictured him careening drunkenly through town, an accident bound to happen. If it hadn’t already. What if he killed himself? Or someone else? God, he was so fucking selfish, it took her breath away. ‘Okay, Nat, listen,’ she said. ‘Call him and if he doesn’t answer, keep trying. When you get him, make him tell you where he is.’

  ‘Then what?’

  ‘I’m going to go and find him. Tell him you can talk it all over but not like this. He has to stop, wait for me then come home and sober up. Ring me back as soon as you can – I’ll get in the car.’

  When she ended the call, Kev was awake and looking at her. ‘What’s going on?’

  She picked her trousers off the back of the chair and shoved her feet in as she explained.

  ‘Bloody hell.’ He threw the duvet off and swung out of bed. ‘I’ll come with you.’

  ‘Kev, I’m police, I don’t need …’

  ‘Don’t be daft. Chuck me my shirt.’ He caught it and pulled it on.

  ‘Seriously, I’m fine, you really don’t have to …’

  ‘He’s driving, right? Off his face?’

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘At the very least you’ll need someone to drive his car back then, won’t you?’ Checkmate. ‘Come on, let’s go.’

  ‘I’m heading for Stratford Road,’ Robin said. ‘Pure guesswork but if he’s as drunk as she says, he probably couldn’t cross town without being stopped. I think he’ll have headed out.’

  ‘Has he done this before, then?’

  ‘No.’ But actually, she wouldn’t know if he had. She was the last person Luke or Natalie ever confided in, and her parents wouldn’t tell her, either. Their mother would protect him – ‘From your judgement, Robin. You’re so hard on him’ – and Dennis never volunteered anything that might be inflammatory; their relationship was enough of a bonfire.

  ‘Not that I know of,’ she amended.

  ‘How about Natalie – the separating thing? Is that normal for them? Do they fight like that?’

  ‘I don’t know.’

  From the corner of her eye, she could see Kev’s knee jiggling. ‘How old’s their boy now?’

  ‘Six months.’

  The phone rang through the Bluetooth, making them both jump.

  ‘I spoke to him.’ The voice from the dashboard shook. ‘He’s out in the country somewhere near a pub called the Durham Ox – he can see it. Or saw it – I don’t know, he wasn’t making total sense …’

  Robin glanced at Kev, Could you …? but he was typing it into Google already.

  ‘Is he still in the car, Nat?’ she asked.

  ‘I don’t know.’

  ‘Is he moving? Is he still driving?’

  ‘I don’t know!’

  Kevin tapped his phone and a map loaded. He nodded at the dashboard: Can I?

  ‘Natalie,’ he said, ‘Kevin Young here, I’m an old mate of Robin’s from back in the day, don’t know if you remember. I’m with her in the car, bit of moral support. I’ve got the Ox – it’s in Shrewley, all right? Little village, and we’re not far off – Rob guessed he’d come out this way so we’re heading in the right direction – ten minutes, fifteen, not long. Have you got anyone with you?’

  ‘Only Jack. He’s in the kitchen, in his highchair. I’m trying not to cry, it upsets him, but …’

  ‘Where’s your mum?’ said Robin. ‘Can she come over?’

  ‘She’s in Gran Canaria, on holiday. And my brother. They all are.’

  Twenty minutes later, Birmingham was behind them and they were speeding on country lanes between fields lush with June grass, hedges and ivy-wrapped trees shivering their leaves in the breeze. Her heart was in her mouth; every time they rounded a corner, she expected to see his car in the ditch or ploughed up against a tree, Luke slumped over the wheel.

  A speed camera on the way into Shrewley – she slowed down in the nick of time. The village started as a series of large detached prop
erties set in sizeable gardens but quickly shaded into a jumble of smaller, modern houses crowded against the pavement. Even at thirty-four miles an hour, they were out the other end in a minute. The place was empty, or still asleep, not so much as a dog-walker in evidence.

  ‘Pub should be any moment now.’

  ‘He’s probably long gone,’ she said, ‘that was twenty minutes ago. He could be miles away.’ But as they rounded a curve in the road, she saw her brother’s silver Ford Focus, apparently undamaged. ‘Oh, thank Christ.’

  Kev pointed. ‘Look.’

  Fifty yards ahead, in a gap in the trees, a dark-haired man in jeans and a black fleece – yes, Luke – was sitting on a stretch of brick wall, his back to the road, head bent towards his knees.

  Another wall lined the other side of the road, another gap in the trees.

  Kev enlarged the map. ‘Shit, Rob, it’s a railway bridge. He’s over the tracks.’

  They were thirty feet away. She stamped on the brake before they got any closer, not wanting to startle him into a sudden disastrous movement. Half a bottle of JD – at least half a bottle – more than enough to throw his balance off. Her hands gripped the wheel. ‘What’s he playing at?’

  ‘I dunno. Just … take it steady.’

  Robin took a fortifying breath, opened her door and got out. Luke had given no sign of hearing the car and he didn’t seem to hear her door close, either, unlike the pair of rooks that burst from the top of a tall pine and nearly gave her a heart attack. An uneasy feeling stirred in her stomach – the breeze was gone and the air felt unnaturally still.

  She approached slowly, the scratch of her shoes loud on the loose gravel. ‘Luke.’

  He jumped as if she’d woken him up and she flinched, hand automatically reaching out even though he was too far away. Behind her, she heard Kev get out of the car.

  Luke bowed his head further, chin almost touching his chest, then turned. God, his face. Wrecked was the word that came into her head. Drunk, yes, definitely, but more than that. He looked distraught. She made eye contact and the vulnerability she saw shocked her. She’d never seen it in him – he’d never let her see. As if he’d read her mind, his face hardened and he turned his back.

  She stood completely still. His body seemed to exude a force field: Don’t touch me. What should she do? She couldn’t grab him, she couldn’t risk him moving to avoid her.

  Luke shifted, put his hands on the wall either side of his body. Holding on or bracing to propel himself forward? His legs dangled. Robin’s heart thumped, blood rushing in her ears.

  ‘Come to push me off?’ He spoke into the empty space in front of him. ‘My just deserts for ruining your life?’

  ‘Don’t be daft.’

  ‘Daft. Oh yeah, that’s me, isn’t it? Daft. Stupid.’

  ‘Mate.’ Kev appeared alongside her. He took another step forward. ‘Why don’t you come down from there? You’ve had a few, haven’t you?’

  ‘Oh, look, it’s Kevin Young. The big man. What the fuck are you doing here?’

  ‘I want to help. Your wife’s beside herself – you’re scaring the daylights out of her.’

  Luke snorted. ‘Couldn’t be bothered to come.’

  ‘She had to stay with Jack, she couldn’t bring him here,’ said Robin. ‘She’s in a real state, Luke. Come on – come down. Please. It’s only an argument – people have them all the time. If anything happened to you, she’d be devastated.’

  He was rocking, his body moving back and forth, backlit by the sky. Then, breaking rhythm, he tipped his head forward, looking between his knees and for a split second, she thought he was falling forward, letting go.

  ‘Luke!’

  He rocked backwards. ‘Fuck off. Leave me alone.’

  Robin tried to think: if he was a stranger, what would she do?

  ‘You need to talk to her, Luke,’ Kev said, taking another small step closer. ‘If you fall off there, you’re never going to sort things out, are you?’

  Luke swayed. ‘You fit to give advice? Your wife left you, didn’t she? And what are you doing with this tart so early?’

  ‘Yeah, my wife left me,’ Kev’s voice was calm. ‘Doesn’t mean yours will. And my girls still need me, like your boy does. I see them all the time. They’re with me three nights a week, every week, holidays, too – they’re with me half their lives.’

  A snort. ‘Half.’

  ‘It’s a lot better than nothing, which is what you get if you fall.’

  ‘Who’s talking about falling?’

  He raised his head. A moment later, Robin heard it, too, a faint beat, getting louder. Nearer. Then she saw what he’d seen first: a train, a yellow-faced grub emerging from the line of low trees at the bend, coming up the track towards them.

  ‘Luke,’ she said, and now her own voice was shaking. ‘Come down. You can sort this out but not like this – you’ve had too much to drink, you’re not thinking straight.’

  He raised his head and looked over his shoulder at her. His eyes shone with a mad exhilaration. His arms stiffened.

  The train was two hundred yards away.

  ‘Luke,’ she said. ‘Please!’

  A hundred. Fifty.

  She charged forward, arms outstretched. ‘Luke!’

  The word was swallowed, unheard. The train streamed under the bridge, taking her knees with it. The ground shook, the air filled with diesel and the roar of the engine, so loud she covered her ears, squeezed her eyes shut. Please.

  When she opened them again, Luke had gone from the wall, the spot where he’d been sitting just a patch of empty sky.

  In her horror, it was a second before she registered him hunched into the angle between the wall and the pavement, arms tight round his knees, a foetal ball.

  Chapter Ten

  When they hauled him to his feet, the fumes on his breath were enough to anaesthetize a horse. Between them, they took almost all his weight as they steered him slowly towards the car. It wasn’t cold but he was shivering, and his face was so pale she thought she could see his skull underneath. Kev took off his jacket and helped him into it while she opened the door. He slumped sideways into the passenger seat as if the bones had gone out of his legs.

  As she moved to close the door, she heard another car. She looked up and her heart sank.

  Warwickshire Police.

  The uniform at the wheel had the door open before the engine was off. He was twenty-five or six, spring-loaded, Show me the fire. ‘Everything all right here?’

  ‘Fine,’ she said, positioning herself between him and the door. ‘Thank you.’

  ‘We had two calls from the village. A silver Ford Focus driving erratically, then we heard someone was up on the bridge here, appeared to be in distress?’

  Robin showed him her badge. ‘DCI Robin Lyons, Force Homicide, West Midlands. I got here a couple of minutes before you.’ She nodded backwards. ‘He’s my brother. He had a row with his wife, he’s a bit upset. We’ll take him home, get him sorted.’

  ‘PC Harris,’ he said, unintimidated. ‘What’s your brother’s name?’

  ‘Luke. Luke Lyons.’

  ‘I’ll have a word.’ He took a pointed step around her, walked to the open door and crouched. ‘How are you doing, Luke? All right?’

  Luke made a non-committal noise.

  ‘Can you confirm your name for me? This is your sister and …?’ He glanced up at Kev.

  ‘Kevin Young,’ Kev said. ‘A friend.’

  ‘You’ve had a few drinks, Luke, haven’t you? How did you get here?’

  Silence.

  Harris looked at Robin, eyebrows up.

  ‘He drove,’ she admitted.

  ‘Right. I’m going to have to ask you to take a breath test, sir, okay?’ Standing, he made a move towards his car for the machine but Robin put out a hand.

  ‘PC Harris, could I talk to you?’

  He gave her a look – Really? – but reluctantly followed her a few steps away before planting his feet. />
  ‘Look,’ she said quietly, ‘my brother’s in a state, you can see that – your caller said he was in distress.’ She looked back and lowered her voice again. ‘His wife wants a separation – she told him last night. He’s gutted – we’ve just managed to talk him down off the wall. Obviously he’s had a lot to drink, but my point is, a drink-driving charge, now, another big problem? Honestly, I don’t know how much more he can take.’

  She made eye contact and held it, pulling on the full force of her rank, hating herself for it. Intimidating a junior officer – Jesus. ‘He’s never done anything like this before – I’ve never known him get in the car after a drink. Also,’ she said, ‘he’s not actually in his car, is he? Or, in fact, anywhere near it. That’s his,’ she pointed. ‘This one’s mine.’

  Seconds passed but then Harris blinked. ‘I’ll take a look at it. If there’s any sign at all he’s hit anything or if we get any reports in later …’

  ‘Thank you,’ she said.

  Kev drove them all back. She’d opened her mouth – hadn’t he come to bring Luke’s car home? – then stopped. It didn’t matter, it could stay where it was, they could pick it up later. She didn’t want to be alone with Luke and she didn’t trust herself to drive at the moment, either. The keys jangled as she handed them over.

  ‘You all right?’ Kev asked quietly.

  ‘Yep,’ she said automatically. Then, ‘Bit frazzled.’

  He put a hand on her shoulder and gave it a squeeze. ‘Let’s get him back. Where are we going?’

  Luke sat mute in the passenger seat, arms wrapped around his body, staring through the windscreen as if he could see the apocalypse on the road ahead. After a couple of minutes, once they were on the main road, Robin got out her phone. Her hands were still shaking as she went to recent calls. She was about to hit ‘Natalie’ when Luke spun around, eyes blazing.