by Billy Taylor
He had a smug expression on his face as he left my trailer. I smiled at myself in the mirror before the make up staff flowed in once again.
I shot the coolest scene today. It’s the first time I’ve been filmed shooting someone! Jessica and Rachel or Eleanor and I, are hiding behind a desk while everyone is shooting at each other. An officer stood next to us is shot and killed. He collapses to the floor and drops his gun and it slides towards us, just out of reaching distance. There is only one guy left in sight. He notices the gun and then notices us. He quickly tries to reload his gun, but me being the brave character I am, slide out and grab the gun and shoot him. He drops to his knees and falls on his face. I’m sure there’s more action packed scenes, although in my opinion, it’s the best action scene ever.
July 22nd
This morning Eleanor rushed into my trailer in a giddy fit.
“He’s coming today! You’re going to love him August!”
She rushed out again before I could reply. I looked at myself in the mirror and shrugged. I’m excited to meet him, she’s told me a lot about him. I want to see if he’ll earn my blessing of dating Eleanor. It’s so weird speaking like this. Two months ago I read a magazine about Eleanor, envying her. Now two months on, we’re new best friends. The make up staff were still dabbing my face as I exited my trailer. They always go over the top with make up. It’s a nightmare to take off and irritates my skin. I paused in the middle of the car park, allowing them to finish. Then a black car came roaring into the car park. I’ve no idea what type of car, but it looked expensive and fast. Could it be Eleanor’s mystery man? The door opened. But to my surprise, it was Ethan. He’d come to surprise me! He had more of a tan and looked taller, somehow.
“Guys, Guys, stop for a second, please.” I said to the make up artists.
I immediately ran over to him. “Hey you!”
“August my dear, how are you?” He shouted back as he closed his car door. Where on Earth did he get a car? He hadn’t even taken any lessons or passed his test before I left. I gently hugged him to avoid covering him in make up. He was wearing one of the ties I bought him for his fifteenth birthday. A plain black tie that has a small white number sixteen in the bottom corner. Sixteen is Ethan’s lucky number, because both our birthdays fall on the sixteenth.
“Why didn’t you tell me you were coming?”
He looked down, “August, we need to talk.”
I frowned at him, “Why?” He only ever said we need to talk before revealing terrible news. Before he opened his mouth to speak, a call of, “Hey babe,” came from behind me. It was Eleanor. She walked past me, grabbed ahold of him, and stuck her tongue down his throat. NO, NO, NO. How could this happen? How did they ever meet! What? How? Why? What? WHAT!
I wanted to fall to the floor and cry. I felt like pulling Eleanor off him and punching her. I’m sure that would’ve been fine. Instead I stood and waited for them to stop kissing, disheartened and broken. Eleanor grinned, clutched Ethan’s hand and rested herself against him. She shrugged. “I didn’t know how to tell you, August. You two are close and I thought it would be best to leave it as a surprise.”
I forced myself to smile. Thankfully, someone shouted saying we were needed on set. Perfect timing. Of all the people in the world, she had to meet him. She was right when she said I was going to love him, because I am, in fact, in love with him. I needed to call Max. Normally, I’d turn to Ethan to discuss my problems with him, but since the problem is him, I can’t talk to him.
The day dragged by. Every second Eleanor wasn’t on set, she was kissing Ethan. God I hate her. Funny how tables turn isn’t it?
That evening, Eleanor insisted we went out for dinner. It’s my own fault. I’ve had well over a decade to tell him I love him, and now it’s too late. They’re going to get engaged, married, have kids. Of course, make me bridesmaid and Godmother. Just to rub it in more.
“So tell me, how did you meet?” I asked. I knew I’d regret asking, but I needed to know.
“Well, I was in New York after having my meeting with my agent and I went to grab a coffee. I walked into the first coffee shop I saw and was about to leave before I saw this handsome one sat at a table by himself. So I walked over and sat with him and he fell in love with me instantly and began to drool.”
“I didn’t!” Ethan said.
“Well, it took you at least four or five attempts to finally say something to me.” Eleanor said, nudging him. Ethan blushed in embarrassment. She continued, “We sat and drank coffee together and I asked him out to dinner that evening, since he didn’t have the courage to ask me. I think the brace on his arm was too tight and affected his speech.” She lightly punched him. I scoffed once. You know the scoff you do instead of laughing. That scoff.
“What were you doing in New York?” I asked.
“Can’t tell you, top secret stuff.” Ethan replied.
I frowned at him, but accepted his secrecy.
“He didn’t even recognise me! It wasn’t until someone asked to have a photograph with me that he asked if I was famous or not! He came into his own when he did a couple of magic tricks for me. I found it so cute. I wasn’t expecting him to be as good as he was!”
Eleanor went on for what seemed like an eternity. “Oh, and we went ice skating and we went to movies and round museum’s and walked around the park!” I swear she listed every activity possible. “And we made love under the stars whilst camping.”
That was when I choked on my breadstick and nearly passed out. I just wanted to head back to the hotel and sleep. When I eventually climbed into bed after an exhausting and demoralising night, I could hear Eleanor and Ethan having sex. I glanced over at Ethan’s clock, 12:22am. That was definitely my cue to exit my room and find something else to occupy me. I wasn’t sitting and listening in. I walked into the reception and called Max.
“Hello.”
“Max, it’s August.”
“Hey! How are you?”
“Have you spoken to Ethan?”
“Not since he left for New York. Why?”
“Why did he go to New York?”
“He went to buy something. I’m not sure. Why are you asking me this?”
“I’m in love with him, Max.”
“Well it’s about time!”
“Shut up! He’s seeing Eleanor Walden. Well right now he’s seeing a lot of her.”
“Holy shit really? Good on him!”
“Max how is that helping me!”
“Sorry. You’ve had forever to tell him, August. How long have you had these feelings? How did he even meet her?”
“It’s been like this for a while, but I only admitted it to myself recently. Ethan meeting Eleanor is irrelevant right now.”
“Ah, August you should have said something. I can’t believe he’s banging Eleanor Walden, though. She’s my dream girl.”
“Inappropriate right now, Max. Thanks for your helpful support anyway.”
“How is filming going?”
“Well, it was going great.”
“I see. I’m sure they won’t last long, and then you’ll be able to tell him.”
“Yeah, you’re right. Thanks Max.”
“You’re welcome. I hope you’re ok, Bye.”
“Bye.”
I suppose I can’t expect much from Max. He’s not the best on giving advice. He speaks his mind. I decided the advice he provided wasn’t good enough. So I called my Mum. Mum always helps in uncomfortable situations. I waited as the phone rang and rang, nervously preparing my confession.
“August, is everything ok?”
“I’m just going to get straight to the point, Mum. I’m in love with Ethan.”
“Well it’s about time!”
“Why does everyone keep saying that?”
“Well, we’ve been waiting God knows how many years for you to admit it, sweetie.”
“He’s seeing the biggest actress in the world right now.”
“Oh great! Wait, is that you?
”
“No it’s not me you fool, Eleanor Walden.”
“Fair play to him, he’s not done bad there has he.”
“Mum, how is this helping me?”
“I’m sorry, sweetie.”
“Ok I get it I should have told him sooner!”
“I’m still half asleep August. Let’s speak about this later, ok?”
“Ok. Bye.”
The message was clear from Max and Mum. It’s about time I admitted I loved him and too late to finally tell him. Just the news I wanted to hear.
August 8th
Ethan only stayed two days. He didn’t say where he was going. We barely spoke to one another since he arrived. Luckily for me, they required me on set throughout most of the day. Ethan and I both knew there was awkwardness between us. Maybe we need time apart, or to be alone and talk. Right now, I want to hurry and finish the movie. That way, I can focus on my personal life. I’m sure these feelings for Ethan will fade. I’m trying to persuade myself that it’s only jealousy.
The first month of filming is over and the second is about to undergo. The final day of filming has been set for the twenty-seventh. Three more weeks. How time has flown.
I need to straighten things up with Eleanor. We’ve lost our sister like relationship, now we only chat about the film. I don’t want her to think I hate her. At this moment in time, I do, I really do. But I can’t blame her, she’s chosen the right guy who makes her happy, which is what she deserves. I just wish she could’ve found someone else.
On set today, I’m thrown through a glass window. Well, it wasn’t real glass. The glass was replaced with sugar glass. I believe that’s its official name. Real glass would hurt, a lot. Sugar glass is a really delicate glass they use for most action films and it breaks really easily. A man picks me up and throws me through the windowpane. They placed this huge beanbag cushion on the other side so I would land safely.
“Action!” Stanley shouted.
Then this guy called John, grabs the top and bottom of my jacket, picks me up, and throws me through the glass. During this I’m trapped in an uncontrollable laughter.
“I’m so sorry,” John kept saying. He felt really bad for throwing me through the glass. He thought he was being too rough.
“Don’t be silly, this is fun!” I replied.
It took us many takes to perfect it because we couldn’t stop laughing for the first few. When I say we, I mean myself. I hope they place those takes of me laughing in the credits at the end, if there’s any. The window replacement people weren’t too appreciative of my laughing as you can imagine. They must’ve hated me. Most of the cast and crew saw the funny side of it. It was good for everyone to have a little laugh and release some stress. Sometimes people forget that you need to have fun.
August 9th
Stanley came into my trailer again this morning. I really thought he’d shout at me this time for laughing throughout the whole window scene.
“I’ve noticed you’re behaving a little odd lately, August. You’ve not been yourself. Is something wrong? If there is you can tell me.”
I shook my head. “I’m fine Stanley. I’m sorry for laughing yesterday.”
Stanley stroked his chin, deep in thought. “Don’t worry about that, everyone found it very amusing.”
I giggled. “Everything’s fine Stanley, you needn’t worry.”
“So the fact that your co-star is sleeping with your best friend isn’t bothering you at all?”
My face dropped. “Why can’t you call it dating?” I snapped.
“There’s my answer.” He said, raising his eyebrows.
I placed my head into my hands and moaned. “Come on, talk to Stanley. What’s wrong my lovely?” He placed his hands on my shoulders.
“I love himmmmm.” I murmured through my hands.
“Are you sure its not because you don’t want to loose your best friend?”
I brought my head from out of my hands and checked my make up in the mirror. “I don’t knowwww.” I sounded like a child.
“Ahhh.” He paused. “Well, I have experience in this field August. I too am stuck in this lagoon of friendship with someone we know.”
At first I didn’t care if he had been in my position or not. But I realised who he was speaking about. Ms. Andrews, well Jasmine.
I turned and faced him. “Really? Did you ever tell her?”
He shook his head. “When the time came to tell her, I was too late. She’d already found someone.”
I walked over to my trailer door and locked it. I didn’t want anyone barging in on our heart to heart conversation. Stanley found a seat on the chair I was sitting on. “I’ve always been afraid of telling her.”
I could see he was disappointed with himself. But I burst into laughter, which probably wasn’t the most appropriate thing to do.
“What’s so funny?” He asked before joining me in laughter.
“Don’t take this the wrong way, but I thought you were gay!”
He stopped laughing and shook his head. “Wow, thanks August! Great confidence boost right there!”
I stopped laughing. “I’m sorry! You always seem flirty with the male producers! Why don’t you tell her? It’s never too late, Stanley.”
Stanley scrunched up his face. “I can’t August. What if she says no or doesn’t feel the same way? Or even worse, thinks I’m flirting with the male producers like you!”
I knelt down beside him after laughing. “You won’t know if you don’t try, will you? If she doesn’t feel the same way you can play the school kid card. I was only joking or my friend dared me to do it.”
Stanley smiled and stood. “I’ll make you a deal, August. I’ll tell Jasmine, but only if you promise to tell Ethan, when he’s no longer with Eleanor. Let’s face it… she’s useless at relationships. I’ll admit the last one wasn’t her fault.”
He offered his hand for me to shake in agreement.
I rolled my eyes at him. “Fine, you’ve got a deal.”
A knock came at the door. “Are you guys finished yet?”
Stanley unlocked the trailer door and opened it. “Do we look finished?”
A huge bundle of apologies came from outside the door. Stanley turned, smiled and winked at me. “Back to work, August.”
He re-opened the door and stomped towards the station. He’s the best.
August 16th
Today is my nineteenth birthday. It’s upsetting I can’t spend it with my family. They always spoil me on my birthday. Instead, I was thousands of miles away sat feeling sorry for myself in my hotel room, staring at Ethan’s clock. I’m living the dream, doing what I love. But I can’t help feeling empty and alone. Mum woke me at 5:00am, calling me to sing happy birthday. As you can imagine, I wasn’t too impressed with her. I growled at her down the phone.
“Oh stop being a grumpy bum.”
“It’s 5:00am Mum. I think you can allow my grumpiness.”
Then there was a knock at my hotel door. “Mum someone is at my door, I’ll speak to you later ok?” She then said three thousand things at once. Why do Mum’s randomly shout all these things to you at the end of phone calls?
“Ok sweetie happy birthday, call me later, promise I’ll come visit soon, I love you, I hope everything is going well, say hello to everyone for me, don’t forget to take plenty of photos for me. Bye, bye, bye, bye.”
It was too early to be dealing with phone calls and people at my door on my birthday. I rolled off my bed and kept the covers wrapped around me as I stumbled downstairs and dawdled to the door. I begged it not to be everyone waiting on the other side ready to shout surprise! I looked hideous and just wanted to sleep. I pawed at the door with my eyes closed in search of the handle. I swung the door open to find Eleanor stood with a huge grin on her face and a bouquet of flowers in her arms.
“Good morning birthday girl, rise and shine.”
I wanted to slam the door on her and return to bed to tell you the truth, and almost did. I s
quinted at her. My eyes were still half asleep.
“Can we talk? I was hoping we could get Breakfast together. Sorry it’s so early, I couldn’t sleep.” She said with a puppy dog expression on her face.
“Sure, let me get ready.” I replied, waving my hand at her to come in. She shuffled past me and placed the bouquet on the table. Then planted her behind on the edge of the sofa with a grin on her face. “Let me have a shower first and then we can go down.” I mumbled. “Ok!”
“Since you found out about me and Ethan, I feel like we’ve been drifting apart. We always clicked before. We were like sisters. I don’t want you to think I will affect your friendship with Ethan.” Eleanor said as I poured my tea.
I appreciated her saying this because it was true, every word.
“Ethan’s never had a girlfriend before, and I don’t know how to react to it and I didn’t speak to Ethan at all when he was here.”
Eleanor smiled and grabbed my hands. “He adores you, August. We both do. Nothing will change! You and I will see more of each other, that’s all.”
I accepted everything she said like a grown up best friend who wasn’t in love with her boyfriend would.
“August, can I ask you something?” Eleanor asked with a serious stare.
I thought this was it. The moment she asked if I love him. What am I supposed to say? I can’t lie to her. “Sure.” My bottom lip started to tremble.
“When you last saw Ethan was he having nightmares?”
I immediately relaxed, but was concerned about the question she had asked me. “A week before I left we fell asleep watching a movie and during the night he jolted me up with his arm. He said he had a nightmare and he didn’t want to talk about it.” I stared down at my teaspoon. This means that Ethan has been having the same reoccurring nightmare for two months. That’s a worrying amount of time. Maybe we needed to get him help.
“He did the same with me. Woke me up during the night, but he refused to talk about it, too. Do you think we should get him a psychiatrist?”
It was an odd conversation to be having with Eleanor, but it was nice to finally talk to her about Ethan. There isn’t anyone else I can think of (other than me) that I would rather see Ethan with.