For Life

by L. E. Chamberlin

  I know Grady’s okay with this. In fact, he’s more than okay. He’s been after me to talk to the kids since about the second week we were together. But I’m absolutely terrified of their reaction. And I’ve been putting them off in part because not including the kids means it’s just a bit less real. Now I have nothing else to hide behind. No escape hatch. I’m in this completely.

  I head to the living room and turn on the lamps. The kids file in with Grady on their heels, Caden looking bewildered and Chloe’s face as stubborn as stone. The kids flank me on the sectional while Grady sits in the recliner.

  Grady doesn’t mince words. “Your mom and I are trying to work things out between us,” he says, looking right at the kids, his face earnest. “And we would appreciate your patience and support.”

  Caden nods, completely clueless about what we mean.

  “We made a decision that we want to be together again, and we’re committed to that.”

  Chloe shakes her head angrily, but I can tell that Caden doesn’t quite get it. “What do you mean, ‘together’?” he asks, frowning.

  “Oh my God, you are so slow.” Chloe barks strangled laughter. “They’re together. Like together together.” She crosses her arms and turns her body away from Caden and I, toward the wall and Grady’s chair.

  It still takes Caden a few seconds, but then it dawns on him. “You mean getting back together? Like a couple?” He doesn’t look unhappy when he swings his gaze to Grady. “Dad, are you moving in with us?”

  “Oh my God!” shrieks Chloe, bursting into tears and drawing her knees up to her chest.

  I raise my hands and interject, “Let’s just all slow down a minute. What your dad is trying to say is—”

  But Grady has already begun to speak, far more calmly than I’m attempting to. “Your mom and I spent a long time not being able to be friends. That’s not what either of us wanted, especially for you two. We worked on some things when we were out in Delaware, came to an understanding. So now we’re trying to work things out between us to have a relationship again.”

  While Grady talks, Chloe unfolds herself, and now she glares at me, her face still red and her eyes puffy. Caden, on the other hand, looks intrigued. His eyes flicker back and forth between Grady and me, studying us as if seeing us for the first time.

  “I love your mom,” Grady declares. “That never changed. We were trying to figure things out a bit more before we told you, but—” he looks sternly at Chloe, “That wasn’t possible. So now we’re telling you as much as we can. We don’t know exactly what we’re going to do next. But the deal is, as soon as we make decisions, we’ll talk to you guys about it. And if there’s a family decision to be made, we’ll make it together. As a family.”

  Caden smiles shyly. “Cool,” he says. “I’m happy you guys are…” he trails off and looks back and forth at us. “Working on… whatever. I like us all being together.”

  Chloe glares at him like he’s the world’s biggest traitor and sinks further into her seat, as if she’s trying to disappear.

  My hands tremble so hard I have to set my wineglass down.

  “Cass, anything to add?” Grady prompts.

  “Yes,” I say, taking a deep breath and winging it. “I know you guys were both really little when your dad and I split up. We didn’t want to, but things just… Things were too much for us to handle back then. We were very young. But we’re trying now. Most people don’t get back together after they get a divorce, so we don’t exactly know what we’re doing. But we’re seeing a counselor, and maybe it would be good if we all talked to her together. All four of us.”

  Caden nods, but Chloe, predictably, rolls her eyes.

  “Chlo? Something to say?” Grady asks pointedly.

  She shakes her head and averts her gaze.

  “So… uh… is Dad staying here tonight?” Caden asks, looking at me. Chloe makes a strangled noise in her throat.

  “No, I’m staying at my place,” Grady says. “I just wanted to come over for a bit so your mom and I could talk to you two.”

  “Okay.” Caden looks back and forth between us before nervously asking, “So, this has been really cool and I’m happy for you guys and all, but is it okay if I’m excused? I kind of have a lot of homework.”

  I’m so relieved I could weep. Chloe might be coming undone, but Caden is taking this all in stride. I think even if we’d told him Grady was moving in tonight, he would’ve had the same reaction. He just needs the lay of the land and he adjusts to it easily.

  Just like Grady, I think, gazing at my children’s father, his elbows on his knees, smiling at his son.

  When Caden heads up to his room, Grady turns to Chloe, who’s picking her fingernails and refusing to look at us.

  “Chlo.”

  She keeps picking for a few beats, then looks reluctantly at Grady.

  “Remember what we talked about?”

  She pauses, then nods slowly. “Mom,” she begins, her voice sounding aggravated and rehearsed rather than truly apologetic, “I’m sorry I snapped at you.”

  I catch her gaze and hold it. “I always want to be honest with you, Chloe. And I’m sorry if you felt left out or betrayed. I didn’t want you to find out like that. Neither of us did.”

  Her eyes fill with tears and her lip trembles, but she doesn’t speak.

  “We were always going to tell you. I wasn’t trying to be sneaky.”

  “It was just a shock,” she says, and this time her words are absolutely sincere. “It just felt like… like everything in the world was different all of a sudden. Uncertain.”

  I want to hug her, but I hold myself back. Instead I reach over and take her hand in mine. “I’m sorry, sweetie.”

  She doesn’t quite hold my hand, but she doesn’t pull away from me, either, which is shocking. After a moment I squeeze her fingers and let go, surprised at the lump in my throat.

  “I have homework, too,” she says, rising slowly from the couch. “I guess I’ll go do that.”

  CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE

  Cassie

  Grady watches me, not moving, until he hears Chloe’s door close, and then he moves to the sofa, twining his fingers in mine as he leans in for a kiss.

  I melt into him, relieved. “So that wasn’t awful.”

  “No,” he murmurs. “Not awful at all.” He rubs his knuckle across the apple of my cheek and my tension starts to ease.

  “When did you get to be so good at laying down the law?”

  He laughs. “About the first time I had them both for the weekend and Chloe challenged me about the kind of sandwich I made her.”

  “Oh, that girl.” I sigh. “Is it wrong to say I’m happy it’s not just me?”

  Grady grins. “She’s not easy, our Chlo.”

  “Do you think she’s going to be okay, though?”

  He hears the worry in my voice and cuddles me close. “She’ll be okay,” he reassures me. “You know how she is. She’s going to sulk around the house, probably write a song about how much she hates us for ruining her life, and then tomorrow she’ll be fine again.”

  “I hope you’re right.”

  “She’ll be fine, Cass, really.”

  “If you say so.”

  “I say so,” he says.

  I scowl at him. “You’re a bit bossy, you know.”

  “Yep.” He cups my face and whispers, “What can I do to put a smile back on this beautiful face tonight?”

  Heat courses through my veins at the innuendo and I shift on the sofa, suddenly restless at his words.

  “Did you have something in mind?” I breathe.

  “As a matter of fact…” He brushes his lips across mine and I quiver at his touch. “I was thinking we might say goodnight to the kids and then lock ourselves in your room for a bit.”

  I’m scandalized and draw back in shock. “You mean have sex with the kids here?”

  He looks at me as if I’m insane. “I seem to remember a lot of sex taking place under the same roof as o
ur kids when they were small.”

  “But they were little! Now they’re… What if they, you know…” I blush and can’t get the words out.

  “What if they hear you begging for my cock?” he teases.

  My face flames. “Oh my God, that’s not even funny, Grady. I’m being serious!” I have a horrible vision of Chloe fuming in her room as theatrical moans rise through the floorboards beneath her.

  “So am I.” He waggles his eyebrows at me. “Maybe I’ll have to gag you.”

  “You’re shameless!” I flare, trying to shove him off me, but he holds my wrists fast.

  “Cass, come on. This was going to come up at some point. We’re adults. Adults have sex. We’ll be discreet, but I’m not going to wait until both these kids are in college to make love to you under the same roof as them.”

  “I didn’t mean that.”

  “But you did mean not when they’re here.”

  I did mean that. But I realize that’s absolutely ridiculous. I bite my lip and say nothing.

  “Which means what, once every two or three weeks?” He shakes his head and tightens his grasp on my wrists. “Not happening. Fuck that.”

  He’s right, but I’m annoyed about him being right on the heels of him being the calm, collected parent who just made everything better tonight.

  “Are you sulking right now?” he asks, incredulous.

  “No,” I lie, looking away.

  “You are so cute when you try to lie to me,” he chuckles, capturing my mouth with his and kissing me until I’m gasping under him. “Can we go say goodnight to these kids now so I can get to work putting that smile on your face?”

  My entire body sizzles. “Yes.”

  * * * *

  I light a few candles in my room and brush my hair while Grady says goodnight to the kids. I’ve already been up to say goodnight. We agreed that until we actually live together we’ll continue to do things as we’ve been doing them. Each of us has goodnight rituals with the kids that neither of us want to give up, and my bet is the kids - especially Chloe - don’t want to give them up, either.

  When he returns to me and locks the door behind him a little shiver runs through me at the gleam in his eye.

  “Candlelight, huh?”

  “I figured we might want to see what we’re doing.”

  “Got that right,” he growls, stalking toward me. “Why are you still dressed?”

  His words send a lightning bolt of desire through me. I fumble with the buttons of my sweater while Grady snatches his shirt off over his head and hastily undoes his belt, his eyes never leaving me.

  “Slow, baby,” he murmurs, even though he’s stripping off clothes as fast as he can. At his command I deliberately take my time with each button, then let the cardigan drop off my shoulders and slip to the floor.

  Then Grady’s sitting on my bed, cock in his hand, watching me slide my jeans off my hips with dark intentions in his eyes, and I don’t want to move slowly, so I start to hurry again. Just like that he takes his hand off himself.

  “No fair,” I protest.

  “Slow,” he reminds me, and I caress myself as I pull my clothing off my body, nice and slow like he wants.

  “Better.” He’s touching himself again, and I am so distracted by the sight of his hand wrapped around his straining shaft, the gleam of pre-cum oozing from the tip of his erection, that I stop moving altogether. My mouth is dry, but it starts to water when I anticipate the salty taste of that first little drop. I lick my lips as I stare at his busy hand, my fingers hooked in the sides of my panties.

  “You can have a taste as soon as you’re naked,” he teases. “Just as long as you don’t rush it.”

  I sigh in frustration and bend from the waist as I turn and remove my last article of clothing the way I know he wants me to: ass facing him, so he can watch. Sure enough, I’m rewarded by a soft groan from behind me as my underwear slithers past my ankles. When I turn to look at Grady his eyes are hooded with desire for me, and I crawl up the foot of the bed, between his thighs, my butt in the air.

  “If you really want to put a smile on my face,” I purr, “you’ll let me take over.”

  He grins and folds his hands behind his head as I dip my mouth to his inner thigh. I trail a line of kisses up to his groin, stopping just short of the crease of his leg, then repeat the same kisses on the other thigh. He squirms below me as the tip of my tongue makes contact with his balls. And then I’m savoring the musky smell of him as I suck one into my mouth and follow suit with the other. I tease him then, nibbling the underside of his shaft, swirling just below the head of his cock with my wet tongue, tasting the slit.

  “Swing those legs around my neck,” he says hoarsely, and I glance up from between his thighs to see the hungriest look on his face. An answering chord of desire rings through me as I straddle him.

  I’ve always thought of this indelicate position as the purview of younger people. When Grady and I were in college we did it, of course. I remember eating lunch with Ariel and some of my other friends after Grady had spent the weekend, and when she asked me slyly how we spent our time I bit my pretzels into the shape of a six and a nine and slid them together in the middle of the table, eliciting peals of laughter from my college girlfriends.

  But when Grady squeezes my hips and covers me with his mouth, I realize he’s chosen this position strategically - both as a means of keeping me distracted so I don’t think about making any noise and as a way of keeping my mouth busy so I can’t. I moan softly around his hard flesh as he feeds on me, his tongue working me in different, wonderful ways from this angle. I try to hover, but he presses my full weight on top of him, pinning me to him, so I’m smothering him between my thighs and he’s lodged deep in my throat, as deep as I’ve ever taken him.

  I suck him firm and fast, until he can’t keep still or quiet and groans against my wet flesh, his fingers biting into my hips. He’s thrusting against my face, begging for me to pick up the pace, so I do.

  Despite our frantic movements, I can feel everything he’s doing to me, the flicks of his tongue against my clit, his breath hot on me, his mouth closing over my entire sex, savoring it. His fingers knead my ass as he devours me with a hum of satisfaction.

  Grady’s heels dig into the mattress as he braces himself to thrust harder into my mouth, and I’m so overwhelmed by my impending orgasm that I don’t have time to worry if I can take him deeper - I just do. I suck furiously, my cheeks hollowing, my tongue making greedy noises that sound foreign and animal. My body is quivering and my mind goes a bit fuzzy as I gorge myself on him.

  A tortured, feral sound escapes his throat as he fights back his climax, waiting for me to come first, and that’s all I need. Everything but the explosion of pleasure in my body disappears. I suck him to keep from screaming, and the second I start shuddering, he floods my mouth. I swallow every last drop.

  CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO

  Cassie

  “Your board VP sucks,” Sandra declares over her sour grapefruit martini when I fill her in on everything that’s been happening at work. “That woman is just evil.”

  “She kind of is,” I agree.

  Sandra and I are having drinks after work at one of my favorite restaurants. The second I saw her I realized just how much I’ve missed her, and I’m thankful she reached out to me, because I’m not sure I could’ve been the bigger person.

  “Do you know she e-mailed me to ask if I’d sent the file to the printer’s? First of all, I’m a professional, and I told them I was going to do it that day - which I did. Second of all, I’m giving them an amazing discount. They can suck it.”

  “Thank you again for that.” I feel a bit guilty, even though I never asked her for a discounted rate. In light of our argument, though, it feels wrong.

  We grumble a bit more about the Dragon Lady, and then Sandra stops and gets serious.

  “I just want you to know, Cass - I’m really sorry for what I said to you the last time we got together. I
had a long talk with Dr. Gaul about it, and I get that I was just projecting my own fears onto your situation. Grady is nothing like my ex, and I realize that.”

  “He isn’t,” I agree. “And thank you. I will say it made me think. I still decided you were wrong. But I thought about it, anyway.”

  “How are you guys?” she asks, her voice tentative.

  “We’re really good. So good.” I nod. “We’re still not sure about when we’re going to make this official in terms of cohabitation, but that’s the plan, eventually.”

  “I really am happy for you. You look great, by the way.” She makes a circling motion toward me. “Whatever’s happening there’s working for you.”

  “It’s all the sex,” I say, trying not to be so smug. “Now I know why you’re so relaxed all the time.”

  She barks a strange laugh and takes a big swallow of her drink.

  “So no more trainer?”

  She shakes her head vigorously. “He’s gone. You don’t want to know.”

  “Sorry to hear that. But you have the new one.”

  “He’s gone, too.”

  “Already? What do you do to these poor men?”

  Sandra shrugs. “The thing about guys that young is they’re a lot of work. A lot of responsibility. And I don’t want to have to raise my own lover. I think I might go just a little bit older next time around. I have my eye on one of my clients. He’s a lawyer, maybe thirty. Definitely not the settling down type.” Just then she remembers something. “Oh! And I never got the chance to tell you. Remember that guy I was saying I wanted to set you up with? From Pilates? Gavin, the British guy?” She waits for my nod of confirmation, then continues. “Well, I went over to talk to him, and I mentioned you, and do you know what he said to me? You would not believe this man!”

  “What on earth did he say?”

  “He said, ‘I can find my own dates, love, but if you decide to give out your number I’m interested.’ Can you believe him?’”