Encompassing Love

by Richard Lord

  Tomorrow sat in the room for a long time, looking around it while she thought to herself about her behavior and the way she was a disgrace to the two people who had done so much to provide her with food and a place to sleep. Then, frustrated at her own loose tongue and having let the two down, she clicked.

  “All of you, you are welcome in Shang-tu!” Then she peered at the bandits that were blocking the way for the pilgrims that came night and day in hopes of building a dream. “There’s only three of you. I will let you run if you are wise enough to.”

  One looked at her and said, “Who the hell to you think you are, bitch?” She clicked and he fell to the ground without his life to follow him on the descent. The second swung and she grabbed his arm and then clicked. “This is desert. It’s night. Learn.” Then she vanished leaving him there.

  CHAPTER 23

  “At some point, I finally realized the duality could only be observed if there were a third party.” -- from the Book of Brian

  “You found me after all. What good does it do?”

  “I’ve known for a while. Persistence isn’t as secretive as you are.” Renfield says as he invites his own butt to the chair adjacent Brian. Then he takes a deep breath.

  “Loss for words?” Brian asks. Then he turns back to finish what he was writing.

  “Usually. Even while I’m talking.” Renfield quips.

  “Something you do a lot of.” Brian responds.

  “You’re the one who taught all of them to keep journals. Are you sure you don’t have more to say than you do, Brian?” Renfield looks at his grandson, remembering when he was very small and his mind reels at trying to guess at how old Brian is. “It was hard to get here. By now your dead, and this is very far before my birth. But, having been here before, I suppose it created a loophole.” Renfield explains.

  Brian turns, looking even more agitated. “A loophole in what?”

  Renfield looks at Brian with a corrective tone to his face, “Things aren’t the same. You know I’m not going to discuss that with you. I just wanted to spend some time with my Dad, I guess.”

  Brian chuckles at that and again turns and looks at Renfield, “Some quality time as a kid, huh? I had plenty of quality time with the person who actually did raise me. In fact, I had forever and no time at all. Thanks for dropping us off to spend so much quality time with Bob.”

  “The choice was what we thought was right. I’m still not certain it wasn’t. I know it couldn’t have been easy to spend so much time out of time, but you did have Persistence and the two of you seemed happy.” Renfield then added, “So your cousin is here somewhere, but I don’t hear her.”

  “She heard your mind as soon as you clicked in. She spends her time the way she does. Usually with her mind blocked to me too. Especially, though, to you.” Brian reported.

  “So I take it we aren’t going out for a night on the town singing Kumbaya in unison?” Renfield shoots back.

  “Why are you here? You are clearly uninvited.” Brian points out.

  “Well, you came to my place, in my office, often, and uninvited when you had questions.” Renfield notes.

  “Do you have a question? I thought you had all of the answers.” Brian doesn’t bother looking up from his writing as he makes the comment.

  Renfield studies Brian and then says, “It’s not a competition. We have the same goals, mostly.”

  “Yeah, mostly. It’s the where we don’t that I find distasteful.” Brian responds. Then he stops writing and looks upward on the wall in front of him. He thinks for a few moments and then turns around and addresses Renfield, “Something new. Something I haven’t seen or can’t see because I’m not able to be there. Why would I not be able to be whenever?”

  “I’d prefer not to discuss that. It doesn’t change anything and I just don’t want to discuss it with you. I came to ask you a question, not the other way around.” Renfield states.

  Brian looks at Renfield with suspicion, but he always suspects Renfield is up to something so he lets it go. Then he says, “Go on, it’s my place, but your show.”

  “When you are in this time, do you have a lover here?” Renfield spits out the question to avoid the awkwardness of it. He realizes that is counter-intuitive, but the question had to be asked.

  “Define this time. I’ve had two wives. When I am here I am simultaneously married to both of them. To my perspective one of them is dead, but I suppose I could always go back and visit.” Brian becomes even more sour as he speaks those words to Renfield.

  “Actually, no you can’t. We can’t change timelines anymore. What we’ve done is now set in stone. It is the only timeline now. I’m sorry, Brian.” Renfield watches Brian’s face for his reaction and adds, “Somehow you sensed that. You remarried.” Renfield looks at Brian and wonders how he can avoid the response Brian will give him. Then he watches as Brian turns back and begins to write again. He notes that Brian didn’t continue what he was writing, he wrote something on a different page and then set it above and to the right of the sheets of paper he was working on. Then he says, “You didn’t answer my question. I’m also curious as to when this is when to you.”

  “You’re always curious. So here’s something to think about: if you weren’t so curious maybe we’d all have normal lives.” Brian taps his foot on the floor once. He isn’t prone to nervous ticks, so even one is a sign that his agitation level is close to critical mass.

  “Did it occur to you that if I wasn’t curious we may not have existed, at all? Not to mention you failed to define normal. I’ve found that word requires a definition each time it is spoken.” Renfield noted the foot tap.

  “Normal, as in, not like us! Normal as in like most people! Normal as in not having to second guess every thing you do because of what effect it might or might not have! As in fucking Normal, Adam!” Brian begins to stand as he his shouting increases in level, “And who the hell said the world wouldn’t have been better off if we didn’t exist?” Brian, now standing and breathing with ferocity glares down at Renfield.

  Renfield simply looks at Brian’s feet. “We do, so it is, therefore how could it be if we weren’t?”

  “Are you done?” Brian’s legs ease in tension.

  Renfield notes the moment and before Brian can move Renfield grabs him to prevent his fall. “I love you. I’ll see you soon, but the next time you see me is not this me. It will be a before me. Just to give you a heads up that I won’t have known about this conversation because then is my past. For me the conversation hasn’t happened yet. But you will remember it which is why you ask me what you do later, to you.”

  “I get it. Why are you explaining this? I’ve been this way my entire life. I’m pretty darn sure I get it.” Brian pauses and then looks at Renfield. “Something is bothering you. You don’t want to tell me. If you can find me in time and space, you should know by now, I can find you too.”

  “Like I said, Brian, you can’t.” Renfield vanishes.

  Brian considers that Renfield seemed to have made more than the normal effort to get there. Then he thinks, “What did he mean by that bit about having been here before.” Then he thinks, “Did he say he loved me?” His mind reviews the conversation and he determines that none of it makes sense as is per usual in conversations with Renfield lately. Then he stands and throws his writing into the center of the room. He yells to the ceiling, “Why can’t I live life in normal chronological sequence!” He looks at all of his writings strewn around the room and calms as he picks up the pages and starts putting them back into order. Then he laughs at the irony.

  CHAPTER 24

  “At some point one just realizes things are pretty good. Then one finds Joy.” -- from the Book of Persistence

  “Brian said you don’t want to see me. I’m sorry, but I really wanted to see you.” Renfield stands wondering if he will receive an invitation to sit. He tries hard not to listen to her mind. He knows she won’t appreciate, given her mood.

  Persistence turns slowly,
not shocked by the visit at all. “So you just decided for me? That’s you Renfield, ever obnoxious and overstepping boundaries.”

  “Perhaps. Usually if I feel rushed.” Renfield responds.

  “What makes you feel rushed Renfield?” She approaches him and notices he doesn’t look well. She stops and ponders that for a moment. It doesn’t make sense to her since he can regenerate so quickly. Without thinking about it she turns her head and then realizes that it is obvious she doesn’t want to think about it and the shock of the realization left her mind open for a few moments and Renfield has already heard that thought. She runs back to him.

  “When is this for you, Renfield. You look considerably older than you did the last time I saw you. That means it’s been at least a century for you.” She reaches out her arms to give him a hug.

  Renfield’s eyes move up and to the corner as he calculates the time in his head. “Something like that. It appears you’ve been sticking around here, which would explain how you still have your youthful beauty.”

  She laughs at her Grandfather, “Oooh, will you marry me Prince Charming?” She moves over to the table on the balcony and pours herself a glass of wine and offers one to Renfield.

  As usual Renfield waves a hand, but he adds, “Do you have water? I’m parched.” He can’t help but consider the thoughts that lead to that question and for a moment he hears her thoughts.

  “Well you’re no longer trying to keep your location secretive. Tell me about your when.” Persistence sees Renfield smile and she adds, “Of course, I’m assuming - the desert and no I can’t hear you. I’m not even sure I would want to if I could.” Persistence turns and looks out past her roses to the city below. She breathes in deep through her nose as if she is smelling the city, its wonder and beauty.

  “Ha! I’ve not been some time you have been, Persistence, but nice try. I sometimes forget how acute your smelling is. Well, not so much that as your ability to identify smells with places and times. Smell is actually the number one sensation when it comes to bringing back memories.” Renfield notes she did not choose to make an effort to get him water.

  “Thanks for the lesson, professor.” Persistence shakes her head at him as she leans closer to him. “What is this visit about, Renfield?”

  “You. And Brian, of course. Brian is still Brian, how are you?” Renfield replies as he leans toward her in response.

  “I’m quite well, obviously and Brian isn’t Brian. That’s why I try to avoid him almost as much as I avoid you.” Persistence comments. Then she adds, “How is my mother?”

  Renfield forces his body to relax so that he doesn’t react to the question. He has no intention of discussing that matter with Persistence. “We haven’t spoken in a while. I did however notice that those roses are beautiful. That particular variety was grown in Europe. But thousands of years from when we are now.”

  “Small luxuries. Brian brought them for me, but you already knew that. Are you using me to find Brian in another time now?” Persistence leaned back as she asked.

  “Persistence, I’m just pointing out that you aren’t the only one who can gauge based off of information in your environment. I did not come to have a hostile conversation with you at all. In fact, quite the opposite. I just wanted to spend some time with you.” Renfield leans back and then he looks over the balcony at the beautiful city below and he too breathes in the air deep. “It is relaxing, I’ll give you that.”

  “You seem to have a question, Renfield, so ask it.” Persistence begins to feel agitated.

  “Oh, yes. Well, I’m not sure I formed it before coming. I really did want to see you. I do love you Persistence. You are unique and I am proud to be your grandfather.” Renfield remarks.

  “Yeah, Brian and I noticed by the way you…”

  Renfield cuts her off saying, “Enough. I’ve already heard the speech from the other Bobbsey twin.”

  “Does that make me Nan or Flossie?” Persistence inquires while narrowing her eyes at her grandfather.

  “It’s just a figure of speech. If I were to choose sometimes I might even say Edith.” Renfield replies.

  “Who was she?” Persistence asks, genuinely wondering.

  “The mother. The author names her only once, I think. I barely remember the books. I’m actually surprised you caught the reference. I’m not sure it’s considered popular culture or even that interesting. At least, not enough that I recall much of the stories.” Renfield shifts his focus to a far off place and it is clear in his eyes that he is trying to remember when it was that he read those books.

  Persistence watches him. Something is clearly wrong with him. She begins to worry. For a man who has lived so long, he always had a remarkable memory and details were something he was certainly good at. “Let me get you that water. It slipped my mind. I’m sorry Renfield. I didn’t mean to be rude.”

  Persistence stood and walked inside and Renfield again looked out over the city and again sniffed the fresh air if it. As Persistence walked back onto the balcony she put the water down and watched as Renfield gulped at it. She noted this was again, not like him.

  “When have you been Renfield? You seem tired. You still look fairly young. But it’s clear that you’ve aged.” Persistence observes.

  “Yeah. I don’t know, maybe a century, if I add it up. Not that long.” At saying that he realized how that sounded to Persistence. He wanted to apologize immediately, but realized that would only add insult to injury.

  “Well, Renfield you’re either blessed or cursed or both.” Persistence responded.

  “So have you met anybody?” Renfield asks Persistence.

  “You mean romantically. A few. No one who moves me. Yet. Well one, but he and I are not…” Persistence blushes and then turns to Renfield, “So have you?”

  Renfield responds, “It’s complicated.”

  “My thoughts exactly. I don’t think we want to discuss our relationships.” She laughed and looked back out over the city with wandering eyes as she took a sip of wine. “Sometimes I miss you. Given our lives, I’d say you did pretty good by us. It’s just easier to be angry with you when you’re gone.”

  “There’s that.” Renfield replies. He adds, “You weren’t too bad of a granddaughter either. Plus who else would push Brian off that cliff?”

  They both laugh at that and then they sigh in unison. They sit for a while in silence as the sun begins to descend.

  CHAPTER 25

  “I don’t think he had it in him to give up.” -- from the Book of Brady

  “Brady!”

  “Shit!” Brady’s hand jolts at the shock and then his coffee spills over the rim and lands on his leg. “Shit!” He wipes at it as if it will cool down if there is less of it, but the damage is done. “What are you doing here? I thought we agreed no contact. Click us someplace before someone sees you!”

  Renfield grabs Brady’s arm and they click out to the alley way near the busy street and walk out into the street to speak with the cloak of the throngs of people around them. “One of the guys who works for you, Johnson. Can you run his genetic line if I get you a sample?”

  “Define can, Renfield. I could if it wouldn’t create a storm of heat on my neck that would end with me not having a job. Then neither of us would even know the results. That kind of thing would be noticed. I‘d ask why you care, but you’re beginning to look old, man. So I’ll assume you have something going on up there that I don’t want to know about. I’m not the guy to help you with it, if that’s what your thinking.” Brady holds out an arm to lean against the corner. “Why are you looking at me like that? Something is more than the standard, your let down look you give me when you have some hair brained scheme.”

  “Like you said, it’s a different when for me and I’m older. I’m not going to discuss it, but you owe me!” Renfield notes that his voice went very low with the emotions he was feeling. He was trying extremely hard not to react in any way that would possibly change Brady’s mind in helping him and he
knew the person he was talking to had no idea what, nor should he know what, Renfield was so insanely angry about when he looked at him. “File it under a different name. I’ll give you the names and identifier number as soon as I have the samples.”

  “Nice try, super man, but I did catch that it just went plural. There is no way I am doing that with a fellow officer and then take the risk a second or third time.” Brady shakes his right leg out as if he were working out a cramp and then looks back at Renfield.

  “Yes. You will because you know I wouldn’t ask you if it weren’t important.” Renfield feels his own eyes flash a look and tries again to control himself.

  “When will you have it to me?” Brady asks.

  Renfield clicks away and then reappears fast enough that it is noticeable to Brady he was gone, but the casual observer wouldn’t process what they had seen, even if they were looking directly at him. “Your lunch, sir.” Renfield hands the paper bag to Brady.

  Brady feels the weight of the bag casually and draws the conclusion that there are only two samples inside as well as the credentials Renfield mentioned. “Who’s the other one?”

  “Someone you’ll never know. Don’t get lost in wondering, it doesn’t effect you.” Renfield replies.

  “Okay. Why are you acting so strange, man? I thought we were buds. That was how I got roped into this to begin with.”

  “That was a long time ago for me, Brady.” Renfield replies but notes a hint of a growl in his own voice and decides he needs to dial that back. “Obviously, it works out, right? I’m older, so you know…”

  Brady looks at him oddly and says, “No, I don’t know. But you know. So when do you expect the results. You know who I have to file this with. A snail could move a mountain faster than they’ll work on this, assuming the credentials you gave me are not linked to a crime, which, just to be clear, would create a nightmare scenario and again, a path to disaster for my career. Furthermore that would mean neither of us knowing what the results were until my trial.”