Motherducking Magic (Bad Magic Bounty Hunter Book 1)

by Michelle Fox

  So mote it be.

  I held my breath, waiting to see if I was about to escape.

  Nothing happened. So mote it was not. Motherducker.

  The door held, and a nasty, crackling rebound zoomed straight for me. Power without an outlet was dangerous. Not wanting another headache, I dove to the floor and the backlash flew over my head and sizzled into the wall.

  "This blows." I returned to the bed and retreated into sleep again. I was going to be the most well rested prisoner the Witch Council had ever seen.

  Some time later, a shuffling sound jerked me out of sleep. I bolted upright, my heart revving, ready to fight. More shuffling. I clutched the blankets. Were there ghosts in the basement?

  The doorknob jiggled, and then something snapped. For some reason, I became afraid. It didn't sound like ghosts or even the Council Guard. As if I even knew what either of those should sound like, but something seemed off. I just couldn't place it.

  Instinct prodded me out of the bed and to the hinge side of the door. Whoever opened it wouldn't see me and I would have the advantage of surprise. Maybe. Assuming they weren't in communication with whoever watched the video feed.

  Which, with my luck, they would be. But I had to try, anyway. I wasn't going down without a fight. Or at least screaming 'boo' from behind the door. Something.

  The door eased open. "Sylvie?" A deep voice whispered my name.

  I didn't take the time for conversation. I launched myself into the door with everything I had, slamming it into whoever stood at the threshold. The door hit something soft and rebounded, pushing me back.

  Whirling around, I aimed for the door again, leading with my shoulder, but whoever had opened it, stepped inside the room and my momentum just shut the door with a loud bang. Worse, the lock clicked home meaning I was trapped with my uninvited guest.

  I spun around to confront the person now behind me, and froze as I registered who it was.

  "Vitor?"

  He threw up his hands and glared at me. "You just locked us in. For the record, I wasn't looking for a roommate."

  "What are you doing here?" I swatted at him, but he stepped back and pushed my arms away, careful to not touch the handcuffs.

  "Keep your silver to yourself." He smoothed his shirt. "Now, first order of business, are you done trying to kill me?"

  I narrowed my eyes."I don't know. Depends on what you say. How did you find me?"

  "The High Priestess has been keeping me down here." He waved at the wall to my left. "We are neighbors and my hearing is sensitive."

  "You mean, you've been here since you left my house?"

  He nodded.

  "Goddess. Was she going to leave you down here forever?"

  He shrugged. "She does not want anyone to know about the relic. Keeping me locked up ensures my silence."

  "What is with this relic? Isn't it like, just a pottery shard from the First Witch's house or something? She lived, what? A hundred thousand something years ago? What could possibly be left from that time? A fossil of her wand? What?" I paced as I spoke.

  "It is way more than that."

  I stopped mid-step and looked at him. "What do you know about the relic?"

  Vitor put his finger to his lips as he moved to the video camera. Jumping up, he yanked it from the wall, threw it to the floor, and stomped on it until it was in pieces. Kicking the remnants of the camera out of the way, he said, "Sheridon stole it from me."

  My jaw dropped. "You've seen this thing? What is it? What's so special about it?"

  "It holds power. Power the First Witch gave it."

  My eyes went wide. "Does the High Priestess know this?"

  He gave me a look. "What do you think?"

  "Oh wow."

  "So let us get out of here, yes?" He reached for me and I stepped back.

  "Why are you saving me?"

  "Because I need you."

  "For what? I'm a bounty hunter, and I'm not allowed to work in that capacity for anyone but the Triad."

  He gave me an exasperated look. "I do not need you for that."

  "Then why save me?"

  "Let us get out of here first. Once we are someplace safe, we can talk. It is going to be a long conversation. Now, come on." He went to the door.

  "But it's locked."

  He ignored me and punched the door. The metal bent but did not give, however, he kept punching, pushing the metal in until the lock failed.

  Pulling it open he gestured for me to step through. "Shall we?"

  I hesitated, spotting two guards sprawled unconscious in the hallway. Their helmets had been ripped off and thrown to the floor. "Did you kill them?"

  "Just knocked their heads together." He gave an impatient wave. "If we are to escape, we must do it now."

  "You lead, I'll follow." I waved him ahead of me. This was my one chance to get the hell out of here. I wouldn't waste it just because it came from a vampire. Plus, he knew something about the relic. Maybe he was a lead I could follow to prove my innocence.

  Vitor took off at a fast clip, moving with a confidence that suggested he knew the layout of the dungeons very well. I lagged behind, taking a moment to search the guards for the key to my cuffs. The Goddess helps those who help themselves, right?

  I found a key, and finally free of the cuffs, I hustled after Vitor. The basement was quiet and appeared to be empty. We didn't encounter any other guards on our way up to the main floor.

  "Where is everyone?" We flitted down a hallway, up two flights of stairs to the main level, and across a living room with carpet deep enough to swallow shoes.

  "I would guess they are out looking for the relic." We approached a bank of glass doors leading to a stone patio. Vitor slid one of the doors open. "Come this way. If we go out the front, we will be seen."

  Vitor dashed across the patio and ran along the back of the property. I churned after him, hoping he wasn't going for distance. My cardio was more chasing Blart for five minutes than any real exercise. Already my lungs burned.

  We ran along the narrow strip of lawn that made up the backyard. It ended in an abrupt cliff, and in the dark, the water below looked like a smudge of ink, but I could still hear the waves from Lake Erie.

  I put on the brakes and gulped air. "We're not going down there are we? Remember, I'm not undead. I don't regenerate."

  "No. Over here." Vitor grabbed my hand and tugged me to a shoulder height stucco wall along the side of the property. He crouched down and then jumped over it.

  "I can't do that," I hissed at him. "I don't have vampire super strength."

  "I will help you." His hand appeared over the fence, at least a foot over my head.

  "That's not going to work."

  "I will jump back and carry you."

  "No. I got it." The idea of being in his arms made me nervous. It had been pretty weird the last time.

  "It is not a problem."

  "No. Really. Thanks. I can do this. Give me a sec."

  Stucco was rough, but not exactly a rock wall. Nevertheless, I tried to get my leg up somewhere over my head so I could plant it high up on the fence. I'd never been able to do the splits and wasn't one for yoga, so that went about as well as expected. My hamstring threatened to snap in half, and my foot didn't get past my chest.

  Backing up, I tried to parkour it. Not that I had ever taken a class, but I'd seen a video or two. Mostly on those shows that featured blooper reels. Now that I thought about it, every parkour dude I'd ever watched had face planted in a really painful way. Well, I'd just have to hope it worked out better for me because I didn't have any other choice.

  I put everything into my run at the wall. My gait lurched a little because my hamstring still hadn't forgiven me, but I persevered. When I neared the wall, I jumped and planted my foot into the crook between the fence panel and the large post anchoring it in place. That worked pretty well. I got halfway up the wall, at which point I kicked into the wall with my other foot and pushed myself up to the top of the fence.r />
  My momentum deserted me then, and instead of going up, I fell back into the grass. I did the math. Parkour wasn't going to happen.

  "Uh, Vitor," I called out from my spot on the ground.

  "Are you done being stubborn?"

  "I'm not stubborn. I am a strong, independent witch who can take care of herself. But probably you should come over and get me." I wanted out of there more than I wanted to avoid Vitor.

  It took him two seconds to jump into the High Priestess' yard, scoop me up and jump back. Screw parkour. I just needed a good vamp.

  Vitor set me down in the yard of another house. The windows were dark and I hoped that meant whoever lived there was either asleep or away.

  "Thanks." I took two steps away from him. I'd been far too aware of his hard chest as he'd clutched me close.

  "Let us go." He marched for the next yard.

  This fence had been built of pine in graduated lengths, which put a low point in the middle of each panel. Vitor, of course, jumped it with no trouble. Show off. I mounted it like a horse and heaved myself over to the other side, rolling in the grass.

  "I can carry you."

  "I know, but I got this." I jumped to my feet, and we made our way to the next fence, which was a standard chain link. I forced the toe of my boot into the metal diamonds and climbed over. I smiled when I didn't fall.

  The fence after that though, was made of smooth wood planks that soared taller than the stucco fence.

  "Can't we just head for the front yard?" I tugged at Vitor's sleeve.

  "We might be seen."

  "You saw her house. No one's there. Who's going to see us? They don't think the relic is in this area, do they?"

  He shrugged.

  "Come on. They're off chasing Sheridon and no way is he here." I didn't wait for Vitor's permission and made my way toward the front of the house whose yard we'd invaded. After a moment's hesitation, he followed me.

  The cul-de-sac the High Priestess lived on was quiet, the only illumination from staggered streetlights. A dark moon lurked overhead in a sky with fast-moving clouds. The wind danced around us, full of energy. A storm rumbled out over the lake, the lightning looking more like tiny sparks than bolts of fire. It would rain later, but for now we would be dry enough.

  We hiked our way to the main drag, a four lane road that connected the burbs to the heart of Cleveland. From there I used my phone to call Ryde, a car service I used sometimes. "Don't flash your fangs and tone down the undead thing 'kay?"

  "Why?"

  "Ryde only wants humans for drivers and clients." Some people didn't want to be stuck in a car with someone who wasn't like them. Normally I thought that was discriminatory bullshit, but given everything going on, it made sense. I wouldn't want to be caught between me and the High Priestess either. Of course, that was exactly why I used them. She would be looking for me everywhere but in the human lane.

  The car, a blue sedan, eased alongside us, its blinker flashing yellow in the night. The passenger window whirred as it went down and the driver leaned over to get a look at us. "You call a car?"

  "Yes." I gave my best 'I'm harmless and give big tips' smile.

  "Where to?"

  I looked at Vitor,who looked at me. "Do we have a plan?"

  "We need someplace to talk."

  "Okay. How about Devil Horns?" I named the only club I knew down in the Flats. All the human nightlife happened down there. Even better, the police kept a close eye on it, denying entry to supernaturals. "I know a back way in."

  "Sure. Get in." The locks clicked, and the driver motioned for us to get inside. I gripped the handle, ready to pull the door open.

  I didn't get any further.

  A line of old muscle cars pulled up behind the Ryde car, tires squealing. Headlights from cross traffic hit the eyes of the occupants and they gleamed as yellow as the blinker on the sedan waiting for me to get in.

  "Shit." I looked for a place to disappear.

  "Anyone you know?" Vitor murmured behind me.

  "Just a bunch of shifters."

  "They seem to be looking for you."

  The shifters stepped out of the car. If I didn't do something, we'd be stuck with them. I had no idea what they wanted. Maybe the High Priestess had sent them. Whatever it was, I doubted they were my friends. I wasn't high status enough for an alpha to give two shifter shits about me.

  I yanked the car door open just as the Ryde driver pulled away from the curb. I lost my grip on the handle and the car zoomed off, the back door flapping open and shut as it went.

  "Hey!" I shook a fist at the taillights.

  So much for a quick exit. Or an easy one. My current option for an out involved making it through a line of shifters who could lift cars. My leathers were good, but they weren't that good. Witches had magic. Shifters had strength. Vampires had immortality. We were designed to complement each other, but that meant we also knew everyone's weakness.

  A shifter, larger than the rest, stepped forward, a streetlight unmasking his face. "Hello, Sylvie." It was Tex, the same bald alpha I'd run afoul of at Alpha's Grill. He looked even angrier now.

  I edged back. "Oh. Hey. How'd you know I was here?"

  He tapped his nose.

  "Seriously? My scent is that strong?" I sniffed at my armpit and only caught the smell of roses from my natural deodorant.

  "I know your smell. More importantly everyone's looking for you, but not everyone can be a friend." He pressed a hand to his chest. "You're lucky we found you first because we're all your friends here."

  "You kicked me out of the bar." I put my weight on one hip and crossed my arms.

  Vitor sidled up to me, his voice soft and his fingers hard on my elbow. "We need to get out of here."

  "Can you take them all?" When he didn't answer, I shook off his hand. "So we're screwed." Glancing over my shoulder, I verified we'd been surrounded on all sides. Yup. Super screwed. I pretended it wasn't true and stood tall. "What do you want, Alpha? I'm kind of busy."

  "The relic."

  I tried not to roll my eyes. "Everyone wants it. Tell me something new. What do you know about it?"

  "We heard you had it."

  "And who told you that?"

  "There's a reward for your capture, but," he edged closer to me, "between you and me, I don't turn my friends in to anyone."

  "Great. Don't turn me in. Now, if that's all, I've got places to go." I made to brush past him to the open sidewalk beyond, but he put out an arm and stopped me.

  "We're not friends just yet." He caught me by my jacket, fisting the leather in his huge hand and dragged me back in front of him.

  "Just tell me what the deal is." I unfurled his fingers one by one, reclaiming my jacket. "I'm a witch not a mind reader."

  "Give me the relic and I'll give you the protection of every pack worldwide."

  I blinked. "Worldwide? You can promise that?"

  He nodded and smiled at me.

  "But what are you going to do with it? It's not your magic." There were three separate but equal branches of the supernatural, and never the twain shall meet. That had been the First Witch's intent, or so the history books said.

  "The First Witch made us. Her magic is our magic."

  "Huh. Okay. Whatever. Listen, I don't have the relic. I never had it. I don't even know what it is exactly, do you?"

  His eyes narrowed. "Lies will kill our friendship."

  "What lies? I'm not lying." Exasperated, I threw up my hands. "Why does everyone think I have it or know where it's at?"

  "Just tell him the truth." Vitor stepped forward and inserted himself into the conversation.

  "What truth?" I froze and gave him a look full of what-the-duck.

  "Where to find the relic."

  I gave him the side-eye."I don't know where to find it."

  "Fine. I will tell him." Vitor squared off and faced the alpha with a calm expression. "I know where the artifact is. You do not need her."

  "What are you talking ab
out?" I shook my head. "You've been locked up by the Witch Council for the last few days."

  "You can stop lying, Sylvie." Vitor gave me a hard look, trying to tell me something, but I wasn't fluent in nonsense.

  I threw my head back and shouted it as loud as I could. "I. Am. Not. LYING."

  "Where's the relic? Whoever tells me is my friend." The alpha looked from me to Vitor, his eyes bright and hungry and feral yellow.

  "It is out-of-state by now." Vitor pointed to the horizon. "Somewhere by Chicago."

  The alpha frowned. "That's it?"

  "I will tell you more when we were closer. It is a good way to keep a friend like me alive, no?" Vitor raised an eyebrow and stared the alpha down.

  A huge hand pointed to me. "What about her?"

  Vitor shrugged. "She is nothing to me."

  "Don't sugarcoat it or anything," I muttered under my breath. Then a little louder, I added, "Jackass."

  Vitor shot me a cold glare. "Leave her behind. She will just slow us down. She is worthless."

  "Do you ever say anything nice?" I jammed my hand in my pocket, fingers curling tight around my phone. As vampires went, Vitor was the most insufferable one I'd ever met.

  Tex nodded after a second. "Very well." He jerked his head in the direction of his green muscle car. "Get in." One of the shifters with him scurried to open the door.

  Vitor moved to leave and I followed him, a plan coming together in my mind. Lurching forward, I grabbed Vitor to keep from falling, and took the opportunity to slip a hand into his pocket and leave a little present.

  "Sorry. I tripped." I backed away, both hands up as Tex crowded me, his eyes glittering a dangerous shade of gold.

  The pack melted away, slipping into their fancy, fast cars and then roaring off into the night. I stood alone on the sidewalk, confused and annoyed. What the hell had that been about? Vitor had said we needed to talk, and he'd made a point of saving me only to trash talk me and ditch me the first chance he got? I shook my head as I started the long walk home.

  Good thing I'd dropped my cell phone in his pocket. He'd told the shifters he had the relic, which meant I would be tracking his sorry, dead ass with my phone.