The Reluctant Cowgirl

by Christine Lynxwiler

  “No, you don’t—” It was too late. Melissa was several yards down the sidewalk.

  Crystal turned back to Brad. Before she could speak, he thrust a fresh bouquet in her hands.

  “Daisies. Your favorite.” He gave her that slow grin that used to melt her heart. Funny how fake it looked now. Tina had been right all along. “I remembered.”

  “Thanks.” She looked down at the flowers. Way too little, way too late. “You know—”

  He held up his hand and stepped closer. He reached out and touched her lips with his finger. “Don’t talk.”

  She jumped back. “No!”

  He looked stunned. “You’re not still holding a grudge, are you? We had something really special.”

  Her stomach rolled. “No, we didn’t. We had nothing special at all.” She knew. Because she’d had something really special. And given it up. What she’d “had” with Brad didn’t even begin to compare. “I’m sorry you wasted your money.” She pushed the bouquet back to him.

  He didn’t take it and the flowers fell to the ground. He gave her a mournful expression. “Look. I’m sorry that happened with Sabra.”

  She stared down at the daisies scattered on the sidewalk then brought her gaze back up to meet his. “Brad, I accept your apology. But you and I have no future. So please don’t waste your time, either.” She spun on her heel and walked quickly down the sidewalk.

  After a minute, she glanced back. He was gone. Hopefully for good.

  ***

  “Push me, Daddy.” Beka’s sweet voice was tinged with irritation.

  He jerked his mind back to the present and reached out to push the swing. “Sorry, honey. I was thinking.”

  “That’s okay,” Beka called over her shoulder as she went up in the air. “I like to think.”

  I don’t, Jeremy thought sourly. He’d thought his life would be perfect if Beka were just home. And it was in so many ways. But Crystal had been gone one week today and he couldn’t stop thinking about her.

  His phone rang, and he retrieved it from his shirt pocket. “Hello?”

  “Jeremy, it’s Patti.”

  “Oh, hi.” She’d had Beka over to her house a few times to play after school and had gotten his number in case of an emergency. But this was the first time she’d called.

  “I was just thinking ... I know it’s Saturday night and you might have plans, but I thought you and Beka might want to eat supper with me. I’m making spaghetti.”

  Beka’s favorite. “That’s really nice, but I think we’d better just stay home tonight. Thank you, though.”

  “Oh, okay. I’ll talk to you later then.” She hung up quickly.

  He felt bad. But he knew Patti was asking for more than supper. And it wasn’t fair to make her think that was a possibility. Because the truth was he had nothing left to give.

  CHAPTER 31

  When Crystal walked into the kitchen Sunday morning, Tina had a piece of toast halfway to her mouth. She froze with it there. “Good morning.”

  Crystal smiled. “Good morning.”

  “I’m afraid to hope, but does the fact that you’re wearing a skirt and carrying a Bible mean you’re going to church with us?”

  “If the offer is still open.”

  Tina grinned. “Of course it is. Zee’s gone to get the keys.”

  Crystal smiled. In spite of the fact that her grandfather in Texas spoiled his only granddaughter, Tina was frugal. But she and Zee had splurged on an old car they only drove on Sundays. “I don’t want to get to church looking like a tumbleweed,” she’d said more than once.

  “I’m so excited.” Suddenly, concern clouded Tina’s eyes. “Listen, our congregation is a little different. It’s probably not what you’re used to.”

  “Aw, c’mon. I’ve lived in the city for seven years. Surely you don’t think I can be shocked.” Considering Tina’s and Zee’s penchant for unusual hair coloring and piercings, she could only imagine. But she wasn’t going so she could gawk. She was going because she was tired of being alone. And she had a strong feeling Tina and Zee would be moving to Texas soon. Being in Shady Grove had made her remember what it was like to have a church family. It would be nice to find that here.

  Tina smiled up at her husband as he walked into the kitchen. “Crys is going with us.”

  “Cool.” Zee gave Crystal a fist bump.

  “She thinks no matter what our congregation is like she won’t be shocked.”

  Zee drew his brows together. “You didn’t tell her?”

  Tina shook her head.

  Crystal laughed ... a little nervously, she admitted to herself. But she wasn’t going to give Tina the satisfaction of begging to know what it was that was so shocking about their congregation. They’d discussed the Bible enough over the years that she knew it wasn’t anything too outlandish. So she’d have to just wait and see.

  In the car, Zee headed north. And just kept going. After half an hour, Crystal looked at Tina to see if she was worried, but she and Zee were holding hands and acting as relaxed as if they were out for a Sunday drive. Crystal smiled at her thoughts. Obviously, they were out for a Sunday drive.

  The big buildings gave way to more trees and smaller houses. Until finally, Zee took a right at a small street and a right into a gravel parking lot. A tiny white frame building sat in the middle of the lot. Tina looked over at Crystal and smiled. “I’m sorry for making you sweat it. But you have to admit, this is definitely different than what you’re used to.”

  “It reminds me of when we’d go visit my granny and papa and go to church with them,” Crystal said wonderingly as she climbed out of the backseat.

  Tina nodded. “That’s why we started here a couple of years ago. I was homesick, and this is exactly like the tiny little congregation my grandmother took me to.”

  “Just wait until you get inside,” Zee said. “It’s like stepping back in time.”

  At the top of the steps, Tina stood back and let Zee open the door. He motioned Crystal to follow Tina in.

  Several men and women stood in the foyer talking. Their faces lit up when they saw Tina and Zee. “You did come back,” a bald man said and nodded toward his gray-haired wife. “I told Lila I wouldn’t be surprised if you honeymooners got to Texas and decided to stay.”

  Tina shook her head. “And leave y’all? No way.” She pulled Crystal forward and introduced her.

  Every one of the forty or fifty members, including the preacher, shook her hand and told her how good it was to have her. Or at least it felt like it. She was shocked, even though she’d said she wouldn’t be, but she’d never felt more welcome.

  By the time the preacher got up to speak, Crystal knew why Tina and Zee loved it so much here. The fervor of the worshippers, young and old, couldn’t be denied. The songs were old—most she hadn’t heard since she’d visited her grandparents’ church as a child—but the zeal was new and fresh. She breathed in an easy breath and opened her Bible. She was glad she’d come.

  Twenty minutes later, Crystal stared at the scripture, the print slightly blurry, as the preacher recounted Jesus’ parable about the son who had taken his inheritance and gone to the far country. She rubbed her eyes with her knuckles. She’d heard this story so many times when she was young. And she hadn’t really forgotten it. She just hadn’t thought of it in a long time.

  The preacher stepped out from behind the pulpit, his voice low and filled with passion. “Can you see the Father watching? Waiting for His beloved child to return? Oh, don’t kid yourself. He knows all the things that happened in the far country. But He just yearns for His child to come home. To let Him make everything right. And when He finally sees His long-lost child, what does He do?” The preacher paused and Crystal clutched the edge of the padded pew. “He runs to meet him,” he said, almost in a whisper.

  His eyes scanned the congregation’s faces. “Today, if you need to come home, He’s watching for you.”

  Crystal’s ears were ringing as he made his final pl
ea to anyone who needed to come. When everyone stood and began to sing, the words of the old song pierced the shell around her heart like a surgeon’s knife. “‘I’ve wandered far away from God.’” She drew in a breath. “‘Now, I’m coming home.’” Her legs trembled and she thought she might have to sit down. “‘The paths of sin too long I’ve trod.’” As the congregation sang, “‘Lord, I’m coming home,’” she stepped into the aisle.

  Tears coursed down her cheeks, but in that moment, she knew, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that God was running to meet her.

  ***

  “Daddy, can I go home with Grandma and Grandpa?” Beka smiled up at him in the church parking lot. “Please.”

  “Honey, we were there all afternoon.” And he’d enjoyed spending time with his parents. But he’d planned for him and Beka to go home after the evening service. He’d hoped to get her into bed early so he could have a little time where he didn’t have to pretend that everything was okay.

  “But Grandpa said he’d show me Snowball’s kittens again if I go home with them.”

  His mom rested her hand on his shoulder. “We’d love to have you both, but we figured you might could use some down time.”

  He put his hand on Beka’s head. “Okay, you can stay for a couple of hours. But no complaining when I come get you. You’ve got school tomorrow.”

  “That’s right,” a voice behind him said. “And I hear your teacher is really mean.”

  Patti walked up beside them.

  Beka giggled. “You are not mean!”

  “Oh. Well, that’s good to hear. But you still have to get your rest.”

  “Okay.” Beka curled her arm around Jeremy’s neck and squeezed when he bent down to give her a hug and a kiss. “I love you, Daddy.”

  “Love you, too, Little Bit.”

  He watched her skip off between her grandparents. It still wasn’t easy to let her go. But he was learning.

  “It’s hard being the one left behind, isn’t it?” He looked up to see Patti smiling.

  “It sure is.”

  “Want to go get a Coke or something?”

  He considered it. She seemed like a really nice person. But she wasn’t the one for him. “Um, Patti...”

  Her face reddened. “It’s okay if you don’t.”

  He watched his parents’ truck pull out of the parking lot. “I just can’t.” He closed his eyes for a second, praying for the right words. “You’re sweet and caring. And very pretty.” He smiled at her. “But I’m in love with someone else.”

  Her answering smile didn’t waver. “Crystal McCord.”

  He nodded.

  Her brows drew together. “I thought she moved back to New York.”

  “She did. But unfortunately, my heart can’t let go.”

  She reached over and touched his hand. “I understand.” Her eyes were filled with compassion. “Two years ago, I lost my fiancé in Afghanistan.”

  Jeremy squeezed her hand and released it. “Patti, I’m so sorry.”

  She nodded. “Everyone is.” Her smile was sweet. “Still, that doesn’t bring him back.” She bit her lip. “Now don’t take this the wrong way. But the only reason I’ve ... I guess you could say ... ‘pursued’ you is because my sisters are driving me crazy badgering me to get back out there before I’m too old.”

  Jeremy shook his head. “Don’t listen to them. You can’t be older than twenty-five.”

  “You win the prize. I am twenty-five.”

  “Patti, you need to listen to your heart.” He remembered telling Crystal that same thing. And her heart had led her away from him. But he knew it was sound advice. “You’ll know when it’s time to get back out there. And when it is time, you’ll have no trouble finding the right person.”

  Patti kissed him on the cheek. “Thanks. Don’t forget to take your own advice.”

  As he got into his truck, he thought about what she’d said. He knew one thing. His heart wasn’t letting go anytime soon.

  CHAPTER 32

  Crystal didn’t know how she’d let Melissa talk her into this. She’d only wanted to go home and rest. But Melissa had insisted that she was having a few of the cast members over to unwind. And that it would be very low-key. Just a few people talking about the play and hanging out. So here she was at Melissa’s “after rehearsal” party.

  The music was so loud she could feel the bass drumbeat. She leaned up against the wall and tried to shrink into it as people crowded around her, some moving to the beat, some just talking. Everyone but her seemed to be having fun. But then she’d mostly come to give the newlyweds some time alone at home.

  “Hey.” The guy standing over her had to yell for her to hear him.

  She glanced up into soulful brown eyes.

  He stepped closer. “You don’t look like you’re having much fun. Want to get out of here?” The smell of alcohol on his breath made her pull back.

  She shook her head. Not with you anyway. “No, thanks.”

  He sipped from the drink in his hand then held up his glass. “Want one?”

  She showed Mr. Clueless her Dr Pepper can. “No, I’m good.” Melissa had assured her there wouldn’t be alcohol served, but Crystal knew from experience that didn’t stop people from bringing their own.

  He pointed toward a small open spot in the crowd. “Want to dance?”

  “No, thanks.” Was she going to have to hit him over the head before he took the hint and buzzed off? He was a good-looking guy. She recognized him as being in the ensemble. He probably picked up a girl at every party he went to.

  “Let’s go for a walk.”

  “I’m a little tired.” She wasn’t any older than anyone else, and they’d rehearsed all day, too, but tonight she felt ancient.

  “Oh, come on. Loosen up.” He grinned, showing perfect white teeth. He reached for her arm to pull her away from the wall.

  She shrugged his arm away. “Back off, okay?”

  “Well, okay. You don’t have to be so snarky. I don’t beg a girl to be with me. I don’t have to.” He turned and walked away. At least she hadn’t actually had to hit him over the head, but it had been touch and go there for a second.

  She glanced at the clock on the wall. Had she been here only an hour? It felt like days. Okay. Fifteen more minutes and she was out of here. That would have to be enough “alone” time for Tina and Zee. They hadn’t asked for it anyway.

  She went into the kitchen where it was a little quieter. Melissa and her roommate were fixing trays of appetizers. She helped out for a few minutes while she drummed up an excuse for making her exit. Melissa looked disappointed when Crystal told her she was leaving, but she didn’t argue.

  As she walked back through the party, she saw that the perfect-teeth guy had moved on to the girl who played one of the other sisters. He had his arms wrapped around her and she was pressed against him as they barely moved in time to a blues tune.

  When Crystal finally got back to Tina and Zee’s, they were in the kitchen eating ice cream.

  “What are we celebrating?” she asked as she walked in.

  Tina laughed. “You know us too well. We just made the final decision. We’re moving to Texas.” She held up the carton of Rocky Road. “Want some ice cream?”