Alien Proliferation

by Gini Koch

  He held the phone away from his ear and looked bored. I could hear Jeff bellowing but couldn’t make out what he was saying. “Yeah? Go ahead, race off like a moron. The baby may be amazing and talented, but she’s less than a week old. She won’t remember you, and she looks just like her mother, so after a while we won’t be reminded of you at all, and I’ll treat her exactly as if she’s mine—she’ll call me Daddy, and I’ll be sure to spoil her and her mother. I think Kitty and Jamie will love it in Australia.” He hung up the phone and handed it back to me. “Expect your husband any moment.”

  Christopher handed Jamie to me again. “I can’t believe I’m going to have to do what I know I’m going to have to do.”

  I took Jamie, Christopher moved between Chuckie and the door. He caught Jeff as he came barreling through at hyperspeed and got him into a chokehold. “Stop it.”

  Jeff was snarling. “Let me at him.”

  “Why? What he did was the only thing that was going to make you listen.” Christopher tightened his hold on Jeff. “It’s adapted to my system, just like it did to yours. I’m stronger now, too. Do you want to spend the time to find out if I’m stronger than you while we have our people in mortal peril? And while your wife’s just holding it together? Or do you think you can wake up and realize there’s a reason we wanted you back here, first?”

  Jamie started to cry. I tried to comfort her, but it didn’t do any good. I was close to crying, too, so that might have been why. I saw Jeff pay attention to what we were feeling instead of being enraged. His body relaxed, and Christopher let him go.

  Jeff came over to me and took Jamie. He cuddled her and hugged me. “I’m sorry.”

  “Let’s get you into dry clothes. Where are the others?” I felt panicked that they’d gone to Paris already.

  “Here, girlfriend.” Reader walked in, Kevin and Paul right behind him. “Hard to catch up to Jeff when he’s doing the enhanced hyperspeed.” He grinned at Chuckie. “Gotta hand it to you, you sure know how to push his buttons.”

  Chuckie shrugged. “Some people make it easier than others.”

  “Look, everyone get into dry clothes, make sure your cell phones are charged, and then, for God’s sake, regroup here before you go racing off.” I figured it couldn’t hurt to remind them not to be foolhardy. I mean, better late than never.

  “Get weapons,” Chuckie added. “I’m sure we’re going to need them.”

  Christopher nodded. “Yeah. I can’t see much, other than the room they’ve got them in. It’s big, but I can’t tell how big. I can only see it because . . . of the bodies.”

  “Change, back here in ten minutes or less.” Jeff had his Commander voice on full.

  Everyone scattered, women included. I got the impression that Melanie and Emily were planning to come back. Well, like daughters, like mothers. Lorraine and Claudia were off fieldwork, but maybe their mothers could cover it. They were doctors, after all, and we clearly needed medical along.

  We went into the bedroom. I put Jamie down in the middle of the bed and helped Jeff get out of his jacket and shirt. I got a towel and started to dry him off. He took it from me, wrapped it around my back, and pulled me to him.

  “You’ll go to Australia with him over my dead body.”

  “That was Chuckie’s point.”

  “Yeah, yeah, fine.” Jeff bent and kissed me. I melted against him. When he finally ended our kiss I nuzzled into his chest and buried my face between his pecs, one of my favorite places to bury. Didn’t have time to bury in my other favorite place. He kissed the top of my head. “You’re staying here. With Jamie. Where it’s safe.”

  “It wasn’t safe for Christopher here.” I brought him up to speed fast on what we’d learned. “Chuckie will explain it all in fuller detail, I’m sure.”

  “I hate him. I really hate him.”

  “As I said to him the other day, I’m glad you’re both straight, or you two would probably be married.”

  “Hardly.”

  I kissed Jeff’s chest. “I wish everyone was safe. Because I know I can have sex now.”

  He laughed. “No one focuses on the priorities better than my girl.”

  CHAPTER 43

  JEFF PUT ON A DRY SUIT—the Elves never failed to produce. His long Armani trench coat was hanging in our closet. It looked great on him. Then again, everything looked great on him.

  I changed Jamie’s diaper. She was going to need to eat soon. I hoped it could wait until everyone left. I picked her up and considered that I also needed to give her a bath and do all those other good mommy things I was most likely failing at. I’d been on the ball a couple of days ago, when nothing much was going on. Add life-threatening dangers, though, and I was already in need of assistance.

  “Oh, by the way,” Jeff said as he took Jamie from me and cuddled her. “Why did you send Harlie after me?” The Poof popped out of the trench coat pocket and mewled at me. Poofs really had amazing abilities.

  “To protect you.”

  “It’s a Poof, not a machine gun. There’s only so much protection they can provide. Keep Harlie with you and Jamie. That’s an order. And, before you can argue, we’re in a Field situation, and that means you are required to obey me because you report to me.”

  “That’s so cute. When you get back, you can try to order me around again. The only time it works is when we’re having sex.”

  He grinned. “I like ordering you around best then anyway.” Jeff wrapped his free arm around me and kissed me deeply. “She’s too young for you to leave her, and it’s too dangerous for you to bring her. Remember that, baby.”

  “I know, Jeff. I’m not an utter moron.”

  “No, but you’re brave and impetuous. You have to sit this one out, baby.”

  “I guess.” I heard people coming into the Lair. “Showtime, Jeff.”

  He sighed. “Yeah.” We walked out of the bedroom. He kept his arm around me and held onto Jamie. I knew he didn’t want to leave us, and it occurred to me that he probably hadn’t wanted to come back here because it would be harder to go to Paris for him now. Felt worse and just totally in love with him at the same time.

  Did a nose count. We had Chuckie, Christopher, Kevin, Tito, Reader, Gower, Naomi, Abigail, Melanie, and Emily, all looking ready to go. I anticipated Jeff’s words.

  He pointed to the four women. “No. You’re all staying here.”

  “Jeff, women can vote these days and hold jobs.” Did my best not to sound sarcastic. Failed, if Chuckie’s fast grin was any indication.

  “Yeah, I know. They can also get killed. However, not tonight. We have Amy already in danger and covering the female side of the house.”

  Melanie and Emily exchanged looks with me. “Jeff? Who’s going to do medical?” Emily asked it calmly, but I could tell she was angry.

  “No one. We’re getting in, grabbing our hostages, and getting out.” Jeff sounded like he believed that.

  “Right. Uh, just how do you think you’re going to do that? Christopher has only a vague idea of where they are.” And I knew how our team’s luck ran.

  Jeff shrugged. “We’ve worked with a lot less.”

  I looked right at him. “Name a time.”

  There was a lot of silence in the room. I looked around. All the men were doing a good job of not looking at any of the women. Melanie and Emily crossed their arms and glared at Jeff. Not up to Christopher’s standards, but still, pretty good.

  “You’re not field trained,” Jeff said, trying to maintain authority. But, these were mothers he was having the stare down with—they’d had a lot more years with authority than he had. “It’s dangerous.”

  “You take our daughters all the time,” Melanie said calmly.

  “Kitty does. I don’t. I never approved having female operatives.” I could tell Jeff knew how that sounded as soon as it left his mouth because I saw him wince.

  “The C.I.A. has female operatives,” Naomi said. “In fact, if I recall, the head of the P.T.C.U. is a woman. Why
, I think she’s your mother-in-law, if memory serves.” Wow, everyone had a sarcasm knob. I was impressed.

  “Angela’s trained.” Jeff was grasping, I could tell.

  “Are you saying we aren’t?” Emily’s voice was at that dangerous, silky level, where any man who opened his mouth was going to be in trouble.

  “Uhhh . . . ” It was clear Jeff had come to the same conclusion I had.

  “Jeff, you need to have medical. I know I’m not going. I hate it, but I’m clear. But right now I think you need all the backup you can get.”

  Christopher closed his eyes. “Tim’s hurt, not life-threatening, yet.” He jerked. “Oh, God, they’re dissecting our agents’ bodies in front of Tim, Amy, and Michael. Not sure why, but the three of them look horrified.”

  Jeff looked at me. “You want to let your best friends’ mothers go along with us why?”

  “Because you need us,” Melanie said. “We know it, and we’re going. It’s that simple.”

  “Us, too,” Naomi said.

  “Absolutely not.” Chuckie’s voice was calm, but I’d heard that tone from him before. He meant it. “You two aren’t going anywhere any more than Kitty is. You have no training for anything like this, no experience, and this isn’t the operation to learn on.”

  “They might be able to find everyone.”

  Chuckie gave me a long look. I knew he was angry. “They might be killed, too. Or captured. Why don’t we take the baby along, Kitty? She’s worth a lot to whoever’s in charge, I’m sure.”

  “We could also argue about this for the next several hours and lose more of our people. Or, we can go.” Jeff wasn’t arguing with Chuckie. I didn’t want to fight both of them. Besides, Jamie needed to be fed.

  “Fine. You’re the ones in charge. I’m on maternity leave. I get it.” Everyone, to a person, geez, to a Poof, turned and stared at me, in obvious shock.

  Jeff gaped at me. “Who are you, and what have you done to my wife?”

  “I don’t like it, okay? I’m just accepting it.” Ungracefully, but at least accepting it.

  Jeff stroked my neck. “You’re sidelined for your safety and Jamie’s safety, not because you’re not a good leader.” He looked back at the Gower girls. “I agree with Reynolds. You two aren’t going anywhere.”

  “What about us?” Emily looked ready to keep on arguing.

  Jeff sighed. “I’ll concede, only because it may take us longer than we want to find them and medical could be an issue. I’d like to remind the two of you, though, that we have a chain of command, and you’re at the bottom of it. You’re not married to me, so don’t think you’re going to order me around and have it work the moment we leave this room.”

  Melanie nodded. “Agreed.”

  “Yes.” Emily gave me a sympathetic smile. “We’ll do our best to cover your side of the operation.”

  “You mean you’re going to get into trouble, fall from a great height, and ignore everything Jeff, Reynolds, or I say?” Christopher’s snark was back, just in time for the offensive. How nice.

  “Whatever. Let’s get going. Everyone get to the launch area.” Jeff kissed me, not nearly long enough. “You behave,” he whispered in my ear. “We’ll be back as fast as we can be. I love you, baby.”

  “I love you, too.” I held him as tightly as I could. We broke apart; he kissed Jamie and handed her gently back to me. Then the A-Cs each grabbed a human, and they all took off, leaving me and the Gower girls to hold down the boring fort.

  CHAPTER 44

  I HEAVED A SIGH. “I need to feed the baby.”

  “We’ll help.” Naomi seemed as let down as I felt. “I guess they’re right. We don’t have any field experience, and you have the baby.”

  “Yeah, it just sucks.” I went into the bedroom, and they came with me.

  Abigail cocked her head. “You know, maybe you should change, just in case.”

  “I look that bad?”

  “Well, the outfit’s a little baggy now.” She grinned at me and went into the closet.

  Did the torpedo thing. Naomi was a great help. Abigail rummaged for clothes for me. “You want your usual jeans and a T-shirt?” she asked from inside the closet. “Or a sweater? Or, wow, you have an Aerosmith thermal. That’s what you want, isn’t it?”

  “Have you been shadowing me for like all my life?”

  “No. Chuck talks about you all the time. I mean, all the time. All. The. Time.”

  “Doesn’t that get old fast?”

  Naomi shook her head. “I think it’s helping him get over you.”

  “Talking about me constantly? Sounds like just the opposite to me.” I was getting worried about Chuckie. What if Christopher was right and he never did get over me? I loved him, and I wanted him to have a good, happy life. How could he do that if he remained romantically in love with me forever?

  Naomi took Jamie and burped her in between torpedo switching. “He’s been in love with you for over half his life now. And he’s been in love with you, not what he thinks you are or would become, but as you were, for every stage of your life.”

  “Great. I feel like the worst woman in the world now, thanks ever.” Took Jamie back, put her on torpedo two. She ate like a horse. Of course, her daddy was hung like one, so maybe that was why. Started thinking about sex with Jeff, managed to drag my mind back to the present situation. Sort of wished I hadn’t—my old buddy Guilt was making a surprise reappearance. Guilt loved the idea of Chuckie never finding anyone else, because Guilt really enjoyed its career.

  “Don’t. Chuck understands.” Naomi sat down on the bed next to me while Abigail brought my change of clothes over. “He won’t let you go, ever. But that’s not a bad thing.”

  “Uh, how? I mean, how does him being obsessed with me equal not a bad thing?”

  “He’s not like Brian was.” Abigail sat down on my other side. “Kevin told us about that. Now, Brian was obsessed and not over the real you. Glad you worked that out with him, because he and Serene are so into each other.”

  “Mutual obsessives obsessed with each other. Yeah, match made in Heaven or Hell, depending. Heaven, in this case, thankfully.”

  “Right. But Chuck’s not obsessed with you.” Abigail took Jamie and burped her this time, while I started to change clothes.

  “What you two are saying sounds obsessed to me.”

  “No, he’s just thorough.” Naomi sounded thoughtful. “He accepted that you were marrying Jeff, and why, over a year ago. The moment you two were married, his focus was to make sure you were going to stay married, happily.”

  “Okay, I can buy that. I mean, he told me he could be married with a ton of kids and would still do what he could to keep Jeff on his toes. But I don’t see how this focus on me is moving him on to someone, anyone, else.”

  “I do,” Abigail said calmly. “Before, he didn’t talk about you at all, to anyone.”

  This was true. Chuckie was a very private person to most. Until a year and a half ago, really, to anyone other than me and his parents. “So?”

  “So he didn’t talk about you because he was keeping you to himself, locked away, where all the things you did that he loved, or made him laugh or feel special, all your shared experiences wouldn’t be shared with anyone else. They were his, and yours, alone. And if you’d picked him over Jeff, they’d still be his and yours alone.”

  Naomi nodded. “But because you didn’t pick him, he’s actually letting you go by talking about you. It’s not like he talks about your past together to just anyone, but we’re close to him. He tells us about you, and because he’s opened that locked part of himself, it’s also relaxing the hold you have on him, so to speak. The more he tells us about you, the more the romantic love part fades.”

  “The friend part’s still there,” Abigail said quickly. “He’ll never stop loving you as his best friend. But I think he’s already well on the way to not loving you romantically any more.” She grinned. “Based on the fact that I know by heart how many times you
made him listen to Aerosmith’s Toys in the Attic and Rocks albums until you made him agree they were the best rock albums of all time.”

  “And then you made him choose which one was best between the two,” Naomi added with a laugh. “And then argued about how he was wrong.”

  “I just think Toys in the Attic is a little better,” I mumbled.

  “We know,” Abigail said. “Trust us, we know.”

  “Which is why we know it’s helping him,” Naomi said.

  “I hope you’re right.” I wasn’t convinced, of course, in part because Guilt liked the idea that Chuckie was talking about me because I’d broken his heart.

  “Give it time,” Naomi said. “He’ll work his own way out of it into where he should be. Don’t worry, don’t push him. The harder you push for him to find someone else, the harder he’ll resist it.”

  “Yeah, sounds like Chuckie.” I contemplated whether to tell them, but I figured they might know anyway. “He was alone on Christmas.”

  “We know. We invited him to be with our family. Our mother still likes to celebrate it. He didn’t want to. We understood. I think his parents did, too.” Naomi laughed. “They know he’s working through the situation in his own way.”

  “You’ve met his parents?”

  “Oh, yeah. Chuck doesn’t treat us like lab rats. And I think he wants to keep an eye on us, so no one else can treat us like lab rats.” Naomi checked Jamie’s diaper.

  “Or worse,” Abigail said darkly. “I’ve heard some fights he’s had with others in the C.I.A.” She shook her head. “I wish Jeff and Christopher and the rest of the guys would stop treating him like the enemy. Sometimes he’s the only friend we have.”

  “Yeah. Your diplomats pulling this stunt is one of the worst things for A-C safety, too. Earth governments don’t like it when the crafty aliens try to take over the world.” I sighed. “So, what’re we going to do to try to keep our minds off worrying?”

  Naomi shrugged. “Your family’s still in the library, I think. Why don’t we go there? Might at least distract us.”