Alien Proliferation

by Gini Koch

  “What if he hurts him?” Amy sounded panicked.

  “I think that’s the idea.”

  “But Christopher almost died. I know you healed him, but we don’t know if he’s really okay.” She sounded close to tears again.

  “Oh, sorry, got the ‘he’s’ and ‘him’s” confused. Trust me, Ames, your dad’s toast. Um, you want him alive? ’Cause if you do, Jeff’s going to have to stop Christopher.” I couldn’t, it would take a lot more strength than I had if ACE wasn’t assisting.

  She shook her head. “That man’s not my father. I don’t know who that man is, or thinks he is, but he’s not my father. My father loved me; he loved you, too. My father would never have done this to any of us, especially not me.”

  I didn’t know if she meant this figuratively or literally, and I decided not to care right now. I was quite clear about how evil people could be, but one of my parents wasn’t the Head Fugly. If Amy needed a little delusion to get through this, I wasn’t going to take it away from her.

  Christopher was beating the crap out of Gaultier. They were rolling around on the ground, but he was winning, not that I’d had any doubt.

  “That man died a long time ago, then.”

  “Yes, I think he did.” Amy took a deep breath. “Is it wrong that I want him to die right now?”

  “No. It wouldn’t be wrong if you wanted him to live, either.” I cleared my throat. “Of course, I sort of fall on the ‘kill ’em all and let God sort it out’ side of the house these days. Seriously, if you want him alive, I have to get Jeff, right now. Because Christopher is definitely going to kill him.”

  Christopher slammed Gaultier’s head against the ground. He was doing a lot of snarling—most of what I could hear in reference to Amy and what Gaultier had done to her.

  “No. I’m . . . I’m glad he’s going to kill . . . that man. If he didn’t, I’d have to.”

  I hugged her. “Then no worries.” At least, no worries right now. Figured we’d deal with emotional fallout later.

  “Why didn’t you marry Chuck?” Odd question, but I considered her mind-set and the situation, so maybe not so odd.

  “He asked at the wrong time. I was already too in love with Jeff to marry someone else.”

  “Chuck’s always been in love with you.”

  “Yeah, and I’ll always love him. He’s still one of my best friends. We just have to stay friends, but that’s okay. I think he’ll get over me.”

  Christopher had them off the ground and was slamming Gaultier against the wall. Apparently, this was a family move. I had to admit I always found it manly and impressive.

  “When did you know you were in love with Jeff?”

  “Oh, I realized it during the ‘my guy’s tied up and they’re trying to kill him’ portion of the festivities. Possibly because it says a lot when the bad guys have to tie your man up in order to do any kind of damage to him. But if you want the truth, I fell in love with him in the first minute I knew him.”

  “So that’s normal?”

  I managed not to grin or laugh. “Yes. You know, they make great mates. Really great. Sure, it’s an adjustment, being with a guy who knows what you’re feeling or how your body’s functioning or everything about you just from touching your picture, but it’s kind of nice, too. To have someone who loves you and understands you so well. And everyone has something to overcome. Plus, they really do recover quickly.”

  “No fights?”

  I managed not to bark a laugh. “Ah, sadly, plenty of fights. Might just be me and Jeff, though. James and Paul don’t fight much. I don’t think Brian and Serene do, either. Just depends on the personalities.” Lorraine and Claudia had had plenty of fights with Joe and Randy, but, as with me and Jeff, it didn’t mean they didn’t love each other or weren’t right together.

  “I suppose. Jeff seems like a wonderful father.”

  “He is. The kind that would die for his child, not hold a gun to her head.” Thought about something else. “The superpowers are pretty cool. Supposedly Jamie and I won’t die early from them. You get used to the talents, too.”

  “I saw you fight. I don’t think I could ever do that.”

  “No worries, don’t figure I’ll do that too often. Sometimes you have to break the rules to save the world, that’s all.”

  “I have no idea what you mean.”

  “Few ever do, Ames. Few ever do.” Gaultier wasn’t moving anymore. I got the impression he was quite dead. Christopher dropping him to the floor was an indication, too. “Oh, wow, there’s Jeff. Be right back.”

  I zipped over to the other doorway, then turned and watched. I mean, why not? Jeff came up behind me and pulled my back against his chest. I leaned against him, heaved a sigh, and let my body relax. I was down to merely really tired, which was a nice improvement over exhausted. White stood next to us.

  Christopher turned to Amy and stalked over to her. “Are you alright? Did he hurt you?” His voice was shaking. She started to cry, and he reached for her. Amy flung herself into Christopher’s arms and buried her face in his neck. He held her and rocked her while he stroked her back. “It’s okay, I’m here. I won’t ever let anyone hurt you.”

  “When did you know?” Jeff asked me quietly.

  “Oh, when we got Richard back from Paris. He was defending her, snarling at my mother over her, it was kind of obvious once I thought about it.”

  “I didn’t pick up any of this. I thought she was going to end up with Reynolds.”

  I managed not to snort a laugh. Didn’t want to ruin the romantic atmosphere, particularly since Christopher had moved Amy’s head so he could kiss her. Nice kiss—at least she seemed to like it, if her body melting against his was any indication. He was good, as I recalled. Not up to Jeff’s standards, but I had a feeling Amy might not agree. Not that I was going to let her test Jeff out.

  “Baby, I call that wishful thinking on your part. Chuckie and Amy will be civil after Operation Confusion, but the best we’ll ever get is mildly friendly, potentially the exchanging of small gifts at the holidays to show willingness. And you didn’t pick it up because Christopher can now hide his emotions from you, and Amy was doing the same thing I did when I first met you—telling herself there was no way she’d fallen in love with some guy just by looking at him.”

  “You really fell in love with me the first time you looked at me?” He sounded like he didn’t believe it but hoped it was true.

  I turned and looked up at him. “The moment you smiled at me, I was hooked, and by the time you told me your name, I was yours.”

  Jeff picked me up, and I wrapped my legs around his waist. He kissed me, and finally we could take our time and let it be a real kiss.

  CHAPTER 68

  “BOY, WE LEAVE TO TAKE CARE of things, and everyone’s making out.” Tim sounded like he was laughing.

  “Well, hard to call it everyone.” Reader was definitely laughing. “I mean, you and I are not making out, because our mates are elsewhere.”

  “Jeff and Kitty always make out,” Jerry said.

  “I see Christopher bagged the latest hottie,” Michael said with a sigh.

  “How do you boys think I feel? I’ve had to watch them far longer.” White cleared his throat. “Ah, Jeffrey? I need to speak with my partner for a moment.”

  Jeff ended our kiss slowly and with clear reluctance. “How did this happen?” He set me down gently. “How did my wife end up turning my uncle into a field operative and her partner?”

  “I’m just good that way. What’s up, Mister White?”

  “Oh, I just wanted to discuss a number of possibilities with you, that’s all.” He looked around. Christopher and Amy were still kissing, quite passionately.

  “If they start to go for it, we all leave the room.”

  “Ah, not exactly where I was heading, Missus Martini, but I appreciate your version of discretion.”

  “Any time. By the way, are we sure you guys found all the bombs?”

  “Well,
Gaultier’s dead and we’re not blown up, so we’re betting on us.” Kevin grinned. “I have to admit, it’s never dull working with Centaurion.”

  Tito gave me the hairy eyeball. “When was the last time you fed your daughter?”

  “Geez. Sheila had a freaking electric milking machine. I pumped out a dairy’s worth, Mom said they had plenty left.” My breasts indicated they didn’t care.

  “Uh-huh. Mister White, can we either have the discussions back at Dulce or have Missus Katt bring the baby here?” Tito was back to full Doctor From Hell mode.

  “Oh, this won’t take too long.” White took my hand and led us out of the ballroom. “I just want to show you the Embassy. I don’t believe that in all this time you’ve ever been here.”

  “No, though Jeff and Christopher have told me about it. They liked it here.”

  “I know. There are actually seven floors, and as you may have noted, it covers a full city block.”

  “Yeah, it’s impressive.” I hadn’t noted, of course. I had an eye for certain details, but not the ones that everyone else seemed to.

  “The basement is, of course, for storage and the main gate. The ground floor is where business is normally conducted, main parlor, diplomatic offices, group kitchen and dining area.”

  “Uh-huh.” I had no idea why he was telling me this. We were at an elevator. Got in, he hit the button for the seventh floor.

  “I’ll mention that the alarms do not go off if you stop the elevators midway. Also, the Embassy has more than one set, on opposite sides of the building.”

  “Classy, and thanks for the tip. Richard, why are we taking a tour?”

  The doors opened, and he led me out. “We normally have up to six diplomatic families living here at any given time. Needless to say, those families need their own privacy. The top three floors are divided in half—one half each is given to a diplomatic couple or family.”

  “Check.”

  He walked us through this particular half. It was huge—easily bigger than my parents’ house. Nothing compared to Martini Manor, in that sense, unless you realized there were five other set-ups just like this one. Huge master bedroom with all the niceties, including a tub for six and a shower for twelve in a bathroom bigger than the Lair. Wondered if they’d used the same architect as the Mandalay Bay but decided now wasn’t the time to ask.

  “The soundproofing is excellent.”

  “Good to know. They have the A-C Elves here, too?”

  “Of course.” He cocked his head. “Jeffrey still hasn’t told you how that’s done?”

  “Nope. You want to tell me?”

  Apparently I sounded too eager. “Sadly, no. I’ll leave it to him.”

  “But you’re my partner now. Partners are supposed to share those key secrets.”

  “In a sense.” Several other bedrooms, living room, library, what I thought was a den, family kitchen and dining room, playroom, some other rooms whose purpose was unclear. You could house a family of eight here with no issues at all. “I’d like to mention that as Mister Reynolds and your mother have pointed out, our diplomats function at least as much as lobbyists. It would be beneficial, I believe, to have some diplomats who could actually tell a believable fabrication, now and then, at any rate.”

  “Better hire some humans, then. You all still can’t lie to save anyone.” Well, other than Camilla and the Chosen Few, but they weren’t figuring into the equation at the moment.

  “Note the lovely view.” I picked up the sarcasm.

  “Yes, lovely. Look, snow. Snow is nice if I don’t have to be in snow.”

  “Are you chilly? We can turn up the new invention we have here, called the heater. We also have air conditioning.” White’s sarcasm knob went to eleven, too.

  “No, I’m fine. Why are you showing me this?”

  “The fourth floor is a gym and entertainment area. The third floor houses staff, including medical and security. The second floor, as you saw, holds the ballroom, as well as music rooms and some salons given over to Washington parties and such.”

  “Fabulous set up. Impressive in all the right ways. Uh, nice drapes. What reaction are you going for here? I’m just curious.”

  “And dense. Though I mean that in the best way possible.” He sighed. “The entire A-C Diplomatic Corps has, ah, disappeared. We cannot function in this country or world without diplomats and lobbyists, nor can our own government function without them.”

  “Oh, got it.” He smiled. “We need to find the right folks to move into the Diplomatic Corps. Got it. What about Paul and James?”

  White closed his eyes. “How does Jeffrey not strangle you?”

  “I beg your pardon?”

  He opened his eyes. “Jeffrey was very happy living here. So was Christopher. You and Jeffrey are new parents. I would like to point out that your baby is less than a week old, and you have not seen her for more than a few minutes for the last many hours. Christopher has, I truly hope, found the right girl who is both not in love with his cousin and able to look past his indiscretions.”

  “Indiscretions?”

  “Drug addiction.”

  “Oh. Well, yeah. I mean, Ames did her share of pot, don’t let her fool you.”

  “Uh-huh. Good to know. I’ll be sure the smoke alarms are up to spec.”

  “Dude, she doesn’t smoke now.” It was, however, another reason she and Chuckie didn’t get along. He’d been there when she’d offered me a joint. I decided Jeff wouldn’t like me thinking about that incident.

  “Oh, what a relief. Am I getting through?” His expression reminded me of my mother’s during Operation Fugly, when she was desperately trying to get across that Christopher was snarling at me because he was interested, not just a total jerk.

  “Erm. No. Not so much. I’m not good with the regular people innuendo.”

  “Perhaps I’ll call Mister Reynolds and ask him to translate it into comic-book-speak.”

  “I’m good with that. Of course, Chuckie’s done some innuendo I didn’t catch, too, so it probably won’t work.”

  I heard a chuckle and turned around. Jeff was leaning against the wall, arms crossed. He looked amused and possessive. “She needs some things spelled out. Baby, he’s trying to suggest we retire.”

  “But I just got him as my partner!”

  White laughed. “I’ll be happy to still partner with you, Missus Martini. I just believe it might be wiser to do so as, ah, more undercover agents, if you will.”

  I looked back to Jeff. “No clue. Sorry. Densest girl on the planet. What are you two talking about?”

  Jeff laughed. “Uncle Richard wants us to head up the Diplomatic Corps, baby.”

  CHAPTER 69

  “EXCUSE ME?”

  Jeff grinned. “Well, us and Christopher. Who’s now got a girl who comes from money. So as soon as we race them down the aisle, we’ll have someone who actually knows the ins and outs of how to set the table and plan the menus and do the fancy invitations.”

  I let this one settle in. “Who else?”

  “Who do you suggest?” White asked.

  “You, for sure.”

  “I’m willing. It will be much easier for Paul if I’m not underfoot.”

  “Paul and James can’t be diplomats?” I was whining, I could tell.

  Jeff sighed. “Baby, the gates. James can get to you in three seconds. Besides, the Pontifex has a residence here, too.”

  “Things were always far too turbulent to use it when Theresa was our head diplomat.” I heard regret, so much regret, in White’s voice. It dawned on me why he wanted us here. To give Jeff and Christopher’s children the chance at what their fathers had never had—a stable life without fear.

  “Doreen grew up here, and she and Irving hate the desert.”

  “A wise choice. I’m sure she’ll bravely carry on her parents’ work while we desperately search for them to no avail.”

  “You’re actually the best liar, too. Wow, Richard, you totally rock.”


  “Really, baby, stop lusting after my uncle. It bothers me on the same level you saying my dad’s hot bothers me.”

  “You worry too much. So, we need two other couples?”

  “Yes, two or three, depending on what official role I take, but not all the positions need to be filled at this moment. As long as we can announce that you and Jeffrey will head up the Diplomatic Corps in the Colemans’ absence, all will remain reasonably calm.”

  “Who’s going to head up Field, Imageering, and Airborne, though? Let alone Recruitment?” I looked at Jeff. “I can’t imagine you willingly taking orders from someone.”

  He shrugged. “I can take them from James.”

  “Seriously? You’ll put a human in as the head of Field?”

  “And as the new head of Airborne, yeah. Tim deserves the promotion.”

  “Considering we’re all pretty much alive because of him, yeah.”

  “More because of you and Richard, but I’ll give you we’d be in a lot of trouble if not for Tim.”

  “We’d be like dead. But fine. So, who’s going to head Imageering?”

  Jeff coughed. “I can’t believe I’m going to say this, but . . . Serene.”

  “You’re high.”

  “No. She held out against Al Dejahl’s mind control. Gladys couldn’t, but Serene, Lorraine, and Claudia could.”

  “But she has a baby coming, too.”

  “You’re arguing against us putting a woman in a position of power?” Jeff sounded shocked.

  “No, not so much. I just thought this was a ‘protect the babies’ move.”

  “There are always going to be babies,” White said quietly. “Some will have to grow up faster than others, some will not.”

  “Plus, with almost no parasites showing up, Imageering is going to have to work more closely with the other government agencies. It’s already become a less active position—Christopher was complaining about it a few months ago. Then he started shooting up and his focus changed, but since he’s clean now, I think we’ll hear him whine about it soon.”

  “Geez, Jeff, he was tricked into it.”