The Undead | Day 25 [The Heat]

by Haywood, RR

  ‘Conceited.’

  ‘I meant I could have picked someone like that pig Donegal, but I like you, I like spending time with you. I love spending time with you.’

  ‘Sure.’

  ‘Neal. They have a virus that will kill 98% of the population. They also have a virus that can cure every disease and illness. We need to focus on that right now.’

  ‘Why do I need to focus on that?’

  ‘Because we need your help?’

  ‘We? Who is we? Is Albert a spy too?’

  ‘Of course, he’s a spy! He found the secret level.’

  ‘Oh, well that’s just great. Everyone is a spy. I’m the only one that isn’t a spy. I say are you and Albert… You know.’

  ‘Oh god no, Jesus no, I love Albert but no… He’s old enough to be my father…’

  ‘He’s very fit though.’

  ‘I told you, I like love handles and podgy bellies.’

  ‘Humph, mine are almost gone.’

  ‘Almost but not quite. I can still feel them.’

  ‘Get off. No, no we’re not having spy sex again. I feel used. Really, I do. Really, Camilla… If that’s even your name.’

  ‘It’s not my name.’

  ‘Get off! I said no… Don’t take your top off. No, please put your bra back on and… And er…Right…I see…I shan’t respond you know. I shan’t get an erection.’

  We had sex again. Which was the best one yet even if I do say so myself and Camilla even orgasmed this time. Well, she said she did, and she shuddered a lot, and I did ask if she faked it, but she said she didn’t.

  ‘It was real,’ she said, then asked me to get off as we needed to talk again. ‘We’ll need your help.’

  ‘What can I do?’ I asked, not in the sense of offering but more in the sense of panicking.

  ‘Influence the others. Make them see Professor Hussein is right. They’ll listen to you.’

  ‘They won’t listen to me! I think it’s gone too far for that.’

  ‘Neal. It has to be A. C will kill everyone. Influence them. Make them understand. Please. For me… And for Albert.’

  ‘Who do you work for?’

  ‘I really can’t say, Neal.’

  ‘Well how do I know you’re not the bad guys?’

  ‘Hmmm, that is a valid point, but in response I would say that no side ever truly considers themselves to be the bad guys, do they? Only the winning side can ever claim that trophy, and I’d rather be on the side that prevented 98% of the population of the planet being murdered by the release of-.’

  ‘Good gosh. You are far more intelligent than I originally thought, but er, well, on that note, I did tell you my research indicates the release of A could be far worse than the release of C.’

  ‘It’s not for us to play God. We have a clear moral responsibility. It’s up to people how they respond and what they do.’

  ‘Yes, yes you’re right of course.’

  ‘Please try, Neal. That’s all we want you to do. Just try and influence them to see reason.’

  ‘I’m not sure.’

  ‘I do like your love handles, I really do.’

  ‘I’ll have you know I am a man of integrity and wooing me with sexual favours will not win my professional opinion.’

  ‘But you will try? For me?’

  I pondered this, while staring into her eyes in a state of post-coital glow and mumbled that I would try. At which point she kissed me again.

  Signing off

  NB

  November 23rd

  What have I got myself into?

  Having been persuaded by Camilla, who is very persuasive I might add, I spent the day feeling like a damned politician, going from scientist to scientist trying to guide them towards choosing A over C.

  My concerns were that if I were too forceful or opinionated it would gain undue attention and seem odd but, in all honesty, it looked like things had gone too far and by lunchtime I expressed such a view to Camilla.

  ‘I really don’t think they’re listening to me,’ I said.

  ‘Try harder,’ Camilla urged me.

  I did try harder, I really did. But by the afternoon it felt I had made zero progress, so I retired to the gym hoping to converse with Albert and express my concerns directly.

  Albert was not there, and Camilla only stopped by briefly. She seemed rather distracted and quiet as she led me into a small room containing cleaning materials where we had sex. (I never thought I would ever be in a secret UN mountain facility, let alone have sex in a cleaning cupboard with a beautiful spy.)

  It was just after I had finished, and while still coupled with Camilla that she whispered in my ear.

  ‘I can’t tell you everything, Neal, but I need you to trust me. Do you trust me?’

  I said I did and that I hoped I could.

  ‘Good,’ she whispered and kissed me again. ‘Albert is going back down there tonight.’

  ‘Okay,’ I said carefully, suddenly feeling very worried.

  ‘He wants you to go with him.’

  I was right to feel very worried.

  ‘He doesn’t know what to look for.’

  ‘I am a statistician. I don’t know to look for.’

  ‘You can read data and you know how data is stored.’

  ‘Right. Did I say I was just a statistician?’

  ‘You did. Just be ready later. Wear sport shoes in case you have to run.’

  ‘Run? I never said I was going. I’m a stati-.’

  ‘I know you’ll do the right thing. Sex with you is so good, Neal. Honestly, I can’t stop thinking about you. I want us to be together when this is over.’

  ‘Really?’

  ‘This isn’t easy for me to say but I… I think I’m falling for you, Neal.’

  ‘Oh.’

  ‘You are so lovely, I’m mad about you. Be ready for Albert and wear sports shoes.’

  Camilla then said she had to get back to work and rushed off after giving me another big kiss and telling me how much she is looking forward to being together after this is over.

  I fretted, as you do, at the prospect of sneaking about a secret facility with a spy and tottered out of the cleaning cupboard, and thought about going for a swim then decided I should rather keep my energy for whatever awful night-time adventures awaited me

  I must admit, although I was terrified, it felt exciting in a surreal way, and besides, Camilla had said she was in love with me, and already my head was filling with dreams of us living in a little snow-covered cottage somewhere remote, by then of course I would be a rugged spy too with a beard like Albert’s and muscular arms that bulged in my sleeves.

  I had those thoughts in mind as I walked back through the lobby only to be stopped by Alexander who asked if I had a moment.

  ‘Dr Barrett, have you got a moment?’

  ‘Of course, how can I help?’ I asked, already panicking a little inside.

  He came closer, eyeing me with what I took to be great suspicion before speaking in a low voice. ‘I want to show you something, Dr Barrett.’

  I swallowed, or rather I gulped, when he motioned for me to follow him behind the reception desk.

  ‘It won’t take long,’ he said while leading me on. We walked by several staff members including Camilla.

  Alexander showed me into what I took to be his office. He closed the door, smiled at me and told me not to worry. ‘Really don’t worry.’ He then crossed over to the wood panelled wall, tapped something and smiled again when a section of the wall moved swung silently inward. ‘I think you will be pleased to see this, follow me, Dr Barrett.’

  The blasted man then showed me the blasted secret level that Albert had blasted well found.

  We went down a flight of stairs to a brightly lit complex of laboratories and offices while all the time I was convincing myself he knew about Camilla and Albert and the sex in the cleaning cupboard and would be feeding me to a tank of disease infected zombie piranhas.

  ‘The Panacea is real,
Dr Barrett,’ Alexander said, sweeping into the room marked A through which we could see another room containing all manner of creatures held in tanks and cages.

  ‘Is it now?’ I whimpered while wishing I had sports shoes on as this seemed a good time to do some running.

  He then proceeded to tell me that all of the creatures in this section had been given the Panacea, and subsequently had been exposed to all manner of nasty things but were all living healthy lives.

  ‘As you can see, they are alive and well.’

  I cannot actually recall exactly what I said in response due to staring about the place looking for the trapdoors that would drop into the piranha tank.

  ‘You are the only one to maintain such a cool head, Dr Barrett.’

  ‘I was what now?’ I asked, not having heard what he said before that.

  ‘Neal!’

  ‘Argh what!’ I turned quickly on hearing my name being called to see a chap called Andrew Jackson. Andrew and I knew each other from the circuit of conferences.

  ‘I heard you were here,’ he said with a big grin, shaking my trembling hand. ‘I’m a lab technician on this one.’

  ‘I don’t know what this one is,’ I told him clearly. ‘I don’t know anything. No one has told me anything.’

  ‘Right,’ he said slowly. ‘Anyway, great to see you again.’

  ‘It is a small world indeed, Dr Barrett,’ Alexander said. ‘The connections we make in life often come back to us.’

  Well that comment certainly increased my paranoia substantially. I could tell he knew I had just had sex in the cleaning cupboard, and that any minute now we’d be led into a room with Camilla and Albert tied to chairs while big burly henchmen stood about laughing.

  ‘This way please, Dr Barrett. Just through here and please may I say in advance how sorry I am to show you this but-.’

  I almost blurted right then that I had nothing to do with it and Camilla seduced me but then saw we were back in a corridor heading towards a door marked C that was covered in all manner of bio-hazard warnings.

  ‘I’m afraid this is very unpleasant to see, but we won’t be close.’ He stopped me in an ante-room next to a window through which we could see a sealed and clearly sterile laboratory filled with glass tanks, and cages containing the same types of creatures as before, except these were all rabid looking beasts. Rats with red bloodshot eyes squeaking angrily while trying to run up the sheer sides. Monkeys with the same eyes but with clawed hands and lips pulled back showing their teeth. Some were attacking their habitats to get out while making the most awful of noises, and I did notice one cage where they were all gathered together drooling.

  ‘That is C, Dr Barrett. You must be wondering why I am showing you this?’

  ‘Oh gosh, not really, I’m fine.’

  He smiled and gave me a studied look. ‘You are a very cool customer indeed, Dr Barrett, and I suspect there is more to you than meets the eye.’

  ‘There really isn’t,’ I told him.

  ‘You are the only scientist here that has not joined either Professor Donegal or Professor Hussein, yet you from all of them can accurately predict the outcomes for the release of either. Why is that?’

  ‘I’m a statistician.’

  ‘I meant why are you not expressing a view?’

  ‘Oh right, er… Well, I always thought science was about impartiality. I’m very impartial me. Not on any sides. No sides. Not me.’

  ‘Of course. But you must have an opinion.’

  What a blasted awful situation I was in with rabid zombie creatures all screaming the place down and a sinister man asking sinister questions. I didn’t know what to say and that blasted silence went on while I fretted, and worried, and tried to think.

  ‘As I thought,’ Alexander said as though I had just proven something. ‘You have an iron core running through you, Dr Barrett, which is why we need you on board.’

  ‘Right,’ I gibbered.

  ‘Big shock,’ he said, holding his hands out with the palms facing me. ‘But then, something about your reaction suggests you already knew.’

  ‘I didn’t know.’

  ‘Of course not, but you worked it out, didn’t you? Yes, I think that is the case. Our project is real, Dr Barrett and my offer to you is to remain working with us when the upstairs project comes to an end.’

  ‘I er…’

  ‘You need time to think. Of course, you do. Mull it over, Dr Barrett. What an exciting opportunity though. To be here when we change the world. Naturally I know you will not breathe a word.’

  ‘No,’ I said weakly.

  ‘Good man!’ he patted me manfully on the shoulder. ‘I knew the first time we met that you had some wits about you. I can only apologise for leaving you amongst the angry mob upstairs, but we need them to leave here thinking the whole thing was a disorganised over-funded waste of time. Come on, I’ll show you back.’

  ‘Was that it?’ Camilla asked me later in my room while Albert took my heater off the wall in case anyone questioned why they were there so late.

  I nodded and said that was it. ‘That was it,’ I said.

  ‘Jesus. It’s real,’ Camilla said as though to herself, but she looked at Albert as she said it. ‘I mean. We kinda guessed, but…’

  I nodded sagely. Trying to appear both knowledgeable and comforting at the same time, and I must confess that it was only then that the reality hit me. The Panacea exists. All of us scientists assumed they either had one, or something close to it, or they were nearing completion. But Camilla was right. Having the confirmation was incredible, but what struck me most was how blasé Alexander was about it.

  ‘He was rather casual about the whole thing actually,’ I remarked.

  ‘He can be anything he wants,’ Albert said. From all three of us he seemed the least surprised. But then he did strike me a very pragmatic man. ‘He’s got the cure for everything. He could fuck a nun, and nobody would give a shit if he said he has a Panacea.’

  ‘So why all of this then?’ Camilla asked. ‘Why run this project?’

  ‘Because,’ Albert said while putting the heater back on the wall. ‘They haven’t decided what to do yet. Seems to me they’ve cobbled something together, realised what they’ve got and thought oh cock it, now what?’

  ‘Okay. That’s good then. Right?’ Camilla said, looking to Albert for guidance. ‘Then we’ve still got time.’

  Albert grunted while holding the heater in one hand and screwing it in place with the other. ‘Maybe.’

  ‘The project is split, Frank. I mean, quite frankly the results are split,’ she said, glancing at me quickly then back to Albert as he rolled his eyes. ‘It’s fifty fifty. Half want A, half want C. That’s it! That’s why they want Neal. Bloody hell.’

  ‘Bloody hell what?’ I asked, not quite liking where this was going.

  ‘You can still influence them,’ she said to me. ‘Neal, they don’t know what to do. That’s why Alexander told you. That’s why he wants you on board. To help them decide.’

  ‘Right. And again. I’m just a statistician,’ I said while that sinking feeling in my belly sunk even further.

  ‘Neal,’ she said.

  ‘No,’ I said.

  ‘Neal,’ Albert said.

  ‘No,’ I said again.

  ‘Neal!’ they both said.

  I didn’t bother replying. What’s the point? Between Camilla’s seduction and Albert’s toothy grin and manly shoulder pats and winks I don’t stand a bloody chance.

  Albert left a few minutes later. Damn him. He’s just so likeable.

  Camilla stayed back. We had sex and she orgasmed again. She even said it was a multiple orgasm, and that I’m the best lover she’s ever had. She whispered into my ear as I got drowsy and told me we’d be together and start a new life after this. Just me and her in a little cottage somewhere. We’d have children and never get sick.

  All I had to do was make sure they released the Panacea, and not the other one.

 
Signing off

  NB

  November 24th

  I have to be quick. Things are happening now, and I need to get this down while my thoughts are fresh.

  Professor Hussein sought me out this morning after breakfast when I had isolated myself in a quiet study room.

  I was nervous. Downright frightened even. I just wanted some peace. The walls were starting to close in on me. I was feeling trapped and starting to imagine the weight of the mountain above us. There was no way out. No air. No escape.

  ‘Dr Barrett,’ Hussein said from the door, startling me from my thoughts. My tea and toast remained untouched on the desk by my side. I wanted to tell him to bloody well sod off. But even that level of confrontation just isn’t me. So, I sat quietly and meekly and said nothing at all as he sat down. ‘You are well today?’ he asked me.

  ‘I’m fine. How can I help you?’

  He paused for a moment and checked the door before shuffling to get closer. ‘I am worried. I think maybe it is real. The panacea. Why do all of this for hypothetical research?’

  ‘Gosh. I see,’ I said while his dark eyes bored into my soul. ‘Well. I think we’ve all had similar thoughts since arriving.’

  ‘What do you know?’ he asked me.

  ‘Me? Oh, very little. Haha! I couldn’t even find my own bathroom this morning. Gosh no. I don’t know anything. Nothing at all. Absolutely nothing.’

  He stared at me for a very long time until I thought some wee might come out.

  ‘I am worried,’ he finally said. ‘If they have it? What will they do? There are only two choices now. A or C. We cannot release C! It is out of the question. You agree with me, don’t you, Neal. You agree with me.’

  ‘I’m not here to give opinions, Professor. I’m here to present my findings.’

  He made a noise in his throat and sat back with a blast of air from his nose. ‘I respect your position, Dr Barrett. But I fear there are other plans at work here. Dark plans, and I want to know who is on my side when the time comes.’

  ‘When the time for what comes?’ I asked before my brain could tell my mouth to shut up.